Plus I'm allowed to fuck your wife.

When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? by George Carlin

...a uniquely flavored kernel ideal for kettle corn. It is rumored that after munching a fistful of kettle corn prepared this way, a popular member of Lush was so…

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." - Woody Allen

naked man named Spider who sat down beside her if she could lick him since he looked so delicious.
"Yes, you may," he replied excitedly, then stood in front of her and....

which was probably the wildest latex-glove water-balloon fight that ever took place in this hospital. The puddles of water had dried overnight but there were still fragments of...

Visually, neatly trimmed is the most erotic for me. But with the lights out, shaved or waxed.

Nobody in my life knows that I write erotic stories and share them here. It's my own little secret.

Yes, I am definitely turned on by my own stories. If not, then I would not bother writing them down. Hotbabeuk pretty much described my writing process:

I write the story in my head over the corse of many days, sometimes weeks. Then when l'm totally happy with the general story I start writing it down. I never write it in one night because l think it can be rushed doing that.

I really take my time, and generally end up masturbating and the end of each session. If I don't then that tells me it's not good enough. How can l expect it to arouse the reader if it fails to arouse me?

Happy Birthday, Gem! I wish you all the best.

I write for myself but at the same time I do make an effort to please the reader. I regard my stories as acts of sex.– set up and character development being the foreplay – the culminating action, the deed itself – and my reader as my partner. I always want to please my partner.

My stories are all personal fantasies of one sort or another that have turned me on. At any given time when my mind is not occupied with the real world, I will have the fragment of some fantasy floating in my brain. Writing gives me the opportunity to explore where these fragments might lead. I usually don’t know how a story will end until I sit down and begin to write it. Once begun my stories almost write themselves.

While I do not write for votes or comments, I do very much appreciate when a reader takes the time to give me their feedback. I post my stories for others to read and getting that feedback is the only way that I know someone is actually reading. And of course, it is nice to know that someone out there is getting turned on by what I wrote.

The party was in full swing when Karen joined her friends on the far side of the dance floor. The DJ, in the middle of a 60s playlist, had the crowd rocking to Sly and The Family Stone while I sat at a table at the edge of the dance floor and busied myself in polite conversation with the table’s occupants who I had just learned were relatives of the bride. I had discreetly tucked myself...

Added 12 Sep 2011 | Category Group Sex | Votes 11 | Avg Score 4.91 | Views 4,694 | 10 Comments

Kneeling in front of Megan, I took her foot in my hand while the crowd around the dance floor began to cheer and chant. I looked up and met her uneasy smile with my own. The mob that encircled us was obviously anxious for her to uncross her legs and for me to begin the ritual. I stalled for time, allowing the bridesmaid the opportunity to gracefully part her legs – if she chose to do so –...

Added 26 Jul 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 14 | Avg Score 4.93 | Views 3,542 | 8 Comments

Eolfica hid behind the dense tangled brush and watched the small gray hare leap away. “It is your lucky day, little one,” she called after it. “I am not so hungry today that I would kill—” She stopped herself in mid-sentence when she saw the blood on the leaves of the thicket. Looking down, the lone huntress saw the impression of a large boot on the mossy forest floor. She...

Added 22 Jun 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 11 | Avg Score 4.82 | Views 3,541 | 7 Comments

Felicia pushed one button after the other on her car radio in search of the right song to listen to. It was late. Exhausted after a long day of work, she was relieved to finally be on her way home. Before she had been able to settle on a song, a muffled musical chirp emanated from her purse on the seat beside her, signaling that a text message had just been received by her cell phone....

Added 02 Jun 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 24 | Avg Score 4.95 | Views 9,506 | 17 Comments

The party was already in full swing when Nancy and her friends arrived. The Victorian ball gown that she had found in the trunk in her grandmother's attic fit nicely after a few custom alterations by a seamstress friend. With the addition of having her hair set in long hanging banana curls she felt like the perfect Scarlet O'Hara. She adjusted the mask that hid the upper half of her face...

Added 18 May 2011 | Category Supernatural | Votes 22 | Avg Score 4.85 | Views 3,384 | 5 Comments

Synopsis of Part One & Two: Miriam finds an old lantern while working for an antique dealer. It is a special lantern – one with a handsome genie residing inside who has the ability to grant any three wishes made by its possessor. Miriam makes her first and second wishes and they are fulfilled beyond her expectations. Miriam put her cell phone down on the small glass-top table and...

Added 11 May 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 14 | Avg Score 4.79 | Views 3,661 | 7 Comments

Laura stood sideways in front of the full-length mirror and stared over her shoulder at her reflection. Very much aware that her 40th birthday was approaching, a frown creased the corners of her mouth and wrinkled her brow. As she inspected her profile, she inhaled deeply, pulled in her stomach, and lifted her breasts with cupped hands. “I remember when…” she thought out loud with a...

Added 06 May 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 24 | Avg Score 4.91 | Views 5,255 | 5 Comments

Synopsis of Part One: Miriam finds an old lantern while working for an antique dealer. It is a special lantern – one with a handsome genie residing inside who has the ability to grant any three wishes made by its possessor. Miriam makes her first wish and it is fulfilled beyond her expectations. Neeeep! Neeeep! Neep! Neep! Neep! The loud electronic sound penetrated the wall of...

Added 02 May 2011 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 7 | Avg Score 5 | Views 2,880 | 2 Comments

Miriam had worked for an antique dealer for the past three years. Her job mainly consisted of visiting estates that her boss had purchased at foreclosure auctions and searching through those buildings for valuable antiques. She always found her job interesting but there was one particular day at work that she would never forget. She had been rummaging through a large attic in an old...

Added 27 Apr 2011 | Category Oral Sex | Votes 7 | Avg Score 5 | Views 4,648 | 2 Comments

After skinny dipping the lone camper steps out of the shallow stream at her campsite. The midday sun is hot and, being so far from civilization here deep in the woods, she sees no harm in lying naked upon her open sleeping bag and letting the warms rays of the sun dry her off. She lies there staring up at the swaying branches of the towering trees above her and listens to the sounds of...

Added 26 Apr 2011 | Category Voyeur | Votes 13 | Avg Score 4.85 | Views 7,044 | 7 Comments