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Keeping Your Mouth Shut or Speaking what is on your mind. Options · View
Headsupmax
Posted: Tuesday, December 18, 2012 8:20:42 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 11/25/2012
Posts: 22
Location: Canada
Knowing when to speak up and when not to is almost an art. From a personal perspective, I've been both right and wrong in both situations. You pays your money, you takes your chances.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, December 18, 2012 9:06:50 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
I always speak what's on my mind. If people don't like it then they can go fuck themselves. I'm a very blunt person. If you ask me to speak the truth to you, I'll do it. Dr. Phil is a pansy compared to me.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, December 18, 2012 10:44:19 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
Speak your mind. It keeps you from going nuts!
swpmexec
Posted: Friday, December 21, 2012 3:33:47 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/4/2012
Posts: 102
Location: Ask, United States
Discretion is the better part of valor ... or so it is said. I do both. The trick is when to understand the limits of scenarios to which decision you make. Most of the time people know where I stand. That said, I am also tactful and couch my meaning carefully.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, June 08, 2013 7:51:05 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
Speak my mind tell it like it is it opens the air if someone doesn't like it too bad
Guest
Posted: Sunday, June 09, 2013 7:32:46 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
Speak my mind.....perhaps a bit too much
BelleduJour
Posted: Sunday, June 09, 2013 9:43:37 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 1,508
Location: Canada
I have always been the 'good' girl - the one that did what I was told, rarely spoke back, played all the roles that were expected of me and always wore a painted smile whilst doing it, I spoke when spoken to, remained steadfast polite and never rocked the boat regardless of anything.

Fucking torture! Thankfully I finally woke up and realized what a crock of shit that was and is. I think it is important to stay true to yourself and speak your mind even if others may not always see your point or be comfortable with your opinions. I agree that some people talk simply because they love the sound of their own voice or love to stir the pot but if you really have something to say, SAY IT!

One of the beautiful things I love about getting older is that I have low tolerance for bullshit anymore and have no issues with letting people know it. I'm also a woman with a brain and have my own opinions and I'm not afraid to share them. Of course, there is a good way to go about it and a not so good way and I always choose to be classy about speaking my mind but speak it I shall.

paul_moadib
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 12:10:57 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/31/2013
Posts: 454
Location: Docking bay 94
In England, I have often found a lot of people tend to keep a tight lip for fear of upsetting others on matters of opinion. Not always, but it is common.

I find that people from mainland Europe tend to speak their mind a bit more without fear of what other people think.
Soleillalune
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 1:38:43 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/29/2013
Posts: 2,030
Location: If I was in your pants you'd know, United States
evil4 I used to blurt out everything right away, which sometimes made things worse. Now I try to think a bit before speaking my mind, but with me it must come out or it may come out in a more evil way

MasterJonathan
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 3:22:40 AM

Rank: Gentleman Master

Joined: 3/6/2013
Posts: 1,067
Location: God's Deep Freezer, United States
You should speak your mind, but do so in a way that is polite, understanding of the other person's opinion, and kind-hearted. However, that is often more easier said than done. I have never been the type to bottle things up and while I try to be nice, I have been the asshole on more than one occasion.

iWoMan
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 11:33:56 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/9/2013
Posts: 389
Location: United States
This one has gotten me in trouble more than once. I usually speak my mind.
Guest
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 12:07:55 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
like they say, pick your battles. the insignificant stuff i disregard, it means nothing. but with important issues i speak up. i discuss in an effective non-threatening way. i want others to listen to me, hearing me is not enough
curious3045
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 8:22:24 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/9/2012
Posts: 7,632
Location: Midwest, United States
Most of the time,,, unfortunately, I speak my mind
_foxxylady101_
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 9:16:08 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 12/30/2011
Posts: 99
Location: Somewhere in, United States
If I am at work, I keep my mouth shut as to not get me in trouble or get me fired. If I am outside of work around friends, or in a relationship, I speak my mind and say what I have to say. My friends know that if they don't want to hear what I have to say, don't ask my opinion.
Guest
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 10:19:40 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
I am the same way, I normally keep my mouth shut. But lately, I have been speaking my mind. Every person has a limit and I think you did what was right. If people don't like what you have to say it isn't your fault. You cannot please everyone. Keep your head up and don't let them bother you.
Guest
Posted: Monday, June 10, 2013 10:43:24 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
Speak you mind!
mowerman05
Posted: Tuesday, June 11, 2013 1:05:11 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 11/19/2012
Posts: 50
Location: Ashland, Ohio, United States
usually best when i keep my mouth shut, its been shown time and time again that nobody wants to hear or cares what i think......
Dudealicious
Posted: Tuesday, June 11, 2013 6:55:17 AM

Rank: Wise Ass

Joined: 11/12/2010
Posts: 5,340
Location: The center of the universe, Canada
Magical_felix wrote:


It's not about keeping things bottled up or speaking your mind. It's about knowing when to shut up or speak up. The same idea can be stupid on monday but genius on tuesday, depending on when and where you said it and to who.


As much as it pains me to agree with this guy, he nailed it. ^This^

The night that changed my life, a four part series of a married man lusting after his co-worker

Guest
Posted: Wednesday, June 26, 2013 3:27:29 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
i heard a saying years ago that sums it up

"that which doesn't leave the lips, doesn't come back to bit you on the ass"

i bottle it up
adagio_sabadicus
Posted: Friday, September 06, 2013 5:56:11 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/24/2013
Posts: 1,246
I usually speak, as I see the truth...not always right but some things just fly in the face of good common sense.
LaneyHearn77
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 5:06:31 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/4/2014
Posts: 116
Location: United States
I typically bite my tongue and keep my mouth shut. I do speak up when need be but try to think it through and do so diplomatically. I have been pushed to my limits a time or two or even three and blew up but didn't really regret it. I warned the people to back off....their fault the didn't heed my warning. Fools. Haha


*******************************************************************************************

Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss.
F. Scott Fitzgerald

BluRootz
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 6:04:16 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 4/1/2014
Posts: 95
Location: Albuquerque, United States
You have to be able to do both. Some people are more conservative then others and we should respect that.
keoloke
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 6:22:58 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/12/2010
Posts: 560
Location: United States
I feel that I got to do both. The real issue is when to speak and when not. If I never do speak my mind I find to have and keep lots of friends and acquaintances, at a price.

If I do.. ahhh I might lose some, so I got to weight the issue versus the human.

I try to remember that when the word is out.. is out

When you find a simple way to handle this.. please let me know.






Choose n Practice Happiness

Life is simple; we are what we eat and what we read. Talk is superfluous.
Dreamer90
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 6:27:20 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 12/29/2013
Posts: 232
Location: Stuck in 68, Germany
I tend to speak my mind very clearly. It actually is hard for me to bite my tongue and not say anything. It's something I'm still learning.

LASARDaddy
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 6:52:27 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/22/2013
Posts: 586
Location: Windsor, United States
I do believe that "a bitter truth is better than a sweet lie" but there are times when you have to modify that. The problem comes in knowing when that is.

For kids I would NEVER quash an idea or attempt at something new. That can kill all of their drive to try new things. With mine I encouraged their independence and there were many screaming, toe to toe, go to hell fights around my house. Eventually every one off them learned that while the cop is standing there writing the ticket is ABSOLUTELY NOT the time to call them a pig.

For older people they live in a child's world some times and I treat them as such. I do not want to destroy whatever they have left of happiness in their life. That would make me not like myself at all. Others too but also a pure judgement call.

Pretty much I'm capable of saying anything to anybody including any deity you can think of.

I control "ME" though, not my ego, so it's always a considered thing when I say anything. On here? You're all adults, you use your minds (some much better than others) so anything is possible.

Courtesy, consideration and kindness go a very long way in my world.

Besides, it's all just an opinion.
mentalcase
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 7:33:13 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 320
i have kept my mouth shut for years, but I am trying to speak my mind more and more.
People have kept things from me, and lied to me. I want to speak the truth as much as possible, tell them what I think
1LovelyKinkyKitsune
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 7:48:02 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/5/2014
Posts: 497
Location: w/my ONLY mate ♥ N/A ♥ plz do not ask
If I try to bottle things up or if I do it for too long it only hurts me. I have to find the right words though. I saw my father internalize and do that all his life and then explode and have heart problems and health issues because of it. It kills people. It is like letting life strangle you and doing nothing about it. It is a terrible place to be in. I have been on both sides of the fence. I fall somewhere in the middle though. I do not always say anything or feel I have to and I try to be pick and choose my battles. I do not have to be right and I do not have to have the last word. I look at people who speak so fabulously candid, with a humble abandon to themselves and are so articulate and concise and just feel a sense of awe. I want to applaud those who are so real and valuable in their humilty! Most people can offer some value if only they WILL talk, if only they would dare to. It could be life changing. I know words are double-edged tricky bastards that can cut, but they can also heal.

Please do not shut up. ONLY if it is good to do so at THAT time, and only is there IF there is nothing to be gained... otherwise I try to contribute and have something to offer. I try very hard not to say things uneeded or that I regret, but I have learned that I still hold far more in than I should and than is good sometimes.

It is learning when to speak and when not to.
It is better to be real. At least no one can accuse me of not knowing how I feel and where I stand. One of the biggest blessing offered to me, after a long long time, was people teaching me to speak truth, love, and being as real as possible to one another. It made a HUGE difference in my life.


Guest
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 8:54:59 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 474,002
I mostly keep very, very quiet. A lot of the time I may agree with someone's belief or oppose it. In situations like that, I'll tell him or her one to one so it doesn't explode into a flame war. I find that I'm far more articulate talking to someone specific about something specific, and we can see each other's way of thinking. There are times I want to explode in anger (quite often after work; it's an intense-stress job) and often I become angry when someone rubs my nose in a belief I don't share, not knowing I don't share it and clearly not caring.

At any rate, I wouldn't support someone's actions or beliefs just to get along with them. I don't like to be liked THAT much that I'll be a yes-man to anything. (I tried that on one job and the boss just thought I was stupid.) But I REALLY hate it when someone hates me after liking me before until I disagreed with them.
SexyTnMama
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 8:55:15 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/14/2014
Posts: 160
Location: West Tennessee, United States
:) I love this question! I believe that as an adult, as an American, as a Mother, as a taxpayer...shall I go on? I have earned the right to stand up and speak my mind and I do so. I don't give one good gol damn about what others might think or say about my stance on a subject. If I believe in something, I'm going to say so and fight for it. When I see wrong being done or an injustice being perpetrated, I'm going to yell like hell and try my best to correct the situation. If people don't like it, too fucking bad. They can go fuck themselves.
Truemalduke
Posted: Thursday, April 17, 2014 9:22:03 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 1/24/2014
Posts: 84
Location: The Fourth Dimension of Dreams
While I am a firm believer in speaking the truth, even if it is an unpleasant, sometimes it is better to keep your mouth shut lest you make a bad situation worse. Its difficult to judge, though.


Of course, if someone can't handle the truth, that's their problem.

Just keep wallowing in your own chaotic insecure delusions.
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