Its quite simple really. You agree your boundaries outside the bedroom, and role play inside. D/s is all about respect on either side - giving each of you what you both want. He obviously either wants to be submissive, or to allow you to be dominant, and deserves full respect for that.

Being more dominant can mean a range of things - from initiating sex more often and making him feel sexually wanted, calling the shots during sex (ie. position changes, controlling the tempo hard/soft), more directed dirty talk (eg. "lick my like this", "fuck me harder" etc) all the way up to full scale BDSM or strap-on.

I think a lot of times, guys are just tired of always being the ones having to get the sexual ball rolling and always being in control of how the sex play progresses, especially once you're in a longer term relationship where the initial hot sex starts to settle down. They want to feel like you want them sexually, and are willing to take charge to get it.

Without really knowing what he's into, you could start by maybe pinning him down, tying him up or blindfolding him, sitting on his face/grinding on it, directing things by being on top more, talking dirty and telling him the things you're going to do to him or make him do to you. I think the vast majority of guys would love that and definitely wouldn't see it as being at a 'disrespectful' level of dominant. From there, you can maybe open things up more and talk - communication is always key - and find out what he has in mind or what he'd like to try next.

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