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abc news storyCNN news storyThe cliffnotes version.. Coy was a born one of triplets, a boy at birth. According to Coy's parent, Coy "behaved like a girl since 18 months old". As Coy grew she always dressed and acted like a girl, even in school. In kindergarten (she's in 1st. grade now), she used the girl's restroom. However, in December her school informed her parents that she is no longer allowed to use the girl's restroom. She may only use the boy's restroom, gender neutral faculty restroom, or the Nurse's bathroom. The school district says they are accommodating Coy's needs while at the same time taking the needs and concerns of other students and parents as equally important. Coy's parents and the Transgender Legal and Defense Education Fund believe Coy's civil rights have been violated. Touchy issue. Obviously, 6yrs old is too young to have any sort of surgeries to alter the genitalia of anyone. And in 1st grade it may not be a big issue for anyone but as Coy grows older and his body develops, how will "normal" girls feel about having a girl with male genitalia in their restroom? The school is kinda caught in the middle. How can the school be sensitive to Coy's needs while at the same time shielding other kids from some of life's realities that they may not be ready to deal with? Did they do enough to accommodate her needs enough or should they have just left things alone? Better to make the change now than in 3rd, 4th, or 5th grade?
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Rank: Penguin Wrangler
Joined: 12/25/2010
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I believe the school has done a great job accommodating Coy's needs, given the circumstances. The needs of one student shouldn't override the needs of all the others. Despite her actions and psyche, Coy is still physically a male. So this is a conundrum indeed. How do we keep Coy's civil rights intact without violating the rights and privacy of the other students? And what happens when Coy gets older and has to change in the locker room for P.E.? Should she be allowed to change in the girl's locker room? I hate the way this is gonna sound, but the well being of an entire group of students shouldn't be pushed to the side to accommodate the needs of one. I'd like to see how the parents of the rest of the students feel.
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If only people were more understanding. This girl has a hard life ahead.
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niceguy89 wrote:If only people were more understanding. This girl has a hard life ahead. for once, we agree on something. :) here's the things, like SWW said, there's more than just the girl (and yes, i consider Coy a girl) involved here. as she and her classmates get older, it will become an issue - sexuality will be discovered, and frankly, the comfort level of young girls having to share a locker room or a bath room with someone they see as a guy, would be very difficult at best. i think that the school is doing it's best to treat this in a respectful and thoughtful manner in regards to everyone involved. that said, i would hope that, the students themselves, as they become aware enough and mature enough eventually take in on themselves to solve this dilemma - how cool would it be if the girls at her HS all sat down with the principal and said 'hey, we're ok with this, Coy's a girl, let's try to come up with a solution, such as X" ? maybe, they'll surprise us, i mean, at that point, Coy will have been living among the general population as a girl and they might just see her as such? this is a tough one, honestly, for everyone. kind of breaks my heart a little.
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I think that in these cases you have to be square and say that it's up to biology. If your biology says male, then you have to use the men's bathroom. The reason I think so is to actually protect transgenders. If you say "Ok, so he wears girl's clothes, then we'll let him use the girl's bathroom and locker room for PE". Before you know it you have some fucked up boys that show up in girls clothes and say "I just grew the confidence to show who I really am". You could end up with the case that transgenders gets suspected as nothing but pervs who wants to get free acess to the ladies' rooms. It's a difficult case, but I think it's really sad that a 6 yo have been put in the middle of this. Coy should be living in ignorant bliss and just be told to use the gender neutral bathrooms. When he gets older and all the girls in the class goes "Sure, she can change with us." then let Coy change with the girls.
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What is society’s reason for separating the male and female restrooms currently? Is it because mentally males and females tend to think differently, is it because they are physically different, or perhaps it’s a comfort issue, just knowing that the people around you do the same things?
Comfort and physical obviously he gets shot down on, the way people think is a bit harder to do, because once you start making one exception you’d have to make some sort of test to test people that want to use the opposite sex’s restroom.
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foxjack wrote:What is society’s reason for separating the male and female restrooms currently? Is it because mentally males and females tend to think differently, is it because they are physically different, or perhaps it’s a comfort issue, just knowing that the people around you do the same things?
Comfort and physical obviously he gets shot down on, the way people think is a bit harder to do, because once you start making one exception you’d have to make some sort of test to test people that want to use the opposite sex’s restroom.
I think it has to do with degrees of shame. Growing up I was taught that penis is a dirty word. Penis ,until I left the church, was evil and nasty. Led to think that having a penis made me a bad person. That boys only wanted to hump and grind. That if adults with rules didn't stop me I'd rape everyone and everything. Girls are sweet angels and boys are satan spawn. Now I know that penis is just a body part. Thanks to a good sex ed class in high school. I understand just how close minded my family and church community were with "private parts". If you are raised wrong you make bad mistakes. Like thinking that a girl with a penis is bad or different. In fact she is just another human. One that needs more support but will get more ridicule.
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It's a very dificult decision to make the School is trying to be politicaly correct but on the other hand the girl in question because to all intense and purpose that is how she see's herself has rights also. By alienating her to be using special toilets makes her stand out as a freak being not recognised as either gender. As far as I can see this would be called mental abuse something that no School should encourage let alone take part in. Maybe the correct way forward would be to install a disabled toilet at least then she would fit in to an explainable section children tend not to judge like many adults do and many would just accept that the girl had a dissabilty and just not question what it might be. As such she is disabled from using either the boys or the girls toilets.
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Eh, tough titties. Everyone has some kind of cross to bear. She'll just learn it younger than most.
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Magical_felix wrote:Eh, tough titties. Everyone has some kind of cross to bear. She'll just learn it younger than most. Of such compassion teen suicides are made.
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I find it kind of funny that the parents weren't in this with dressing the kid as a girl. But then maybe in their house the children run things and the parents are the ones who need their hand held when crossing the street. Sounds like someone wants their 15 minutes.
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