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Poll Question : Folder or Scruncher
Choice Votes Statistics
Folder 24 54 %
Scruncher 20 45 %

Toilet Etiquette Options · View
matt55
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 3:07:36 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/31/2013
Posts: 374
Location: Atlanta area, United States
This thread is prejudiced as there is no acknowledgement of corn cob users whatsoever. Shame on you all!
sprite
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 3:13:14 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 13,640
Location: My Tower, United States
matt55 wrote:
This thread is prejudiced as there is no acknowledgement of corn cob users whatsoever. Shame on you all!


WellMadeMale
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 3:15:45 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,213
Location: Cakeland, United States
Pfft... youth ~

You are all obviously rookies.

Anyone over the age of 39 knows that for the best hygiene, one is supposed to defecate during the morning shower...and stomp any particulate matter that won't dissolve in the scalding, high pressure shower spray - down the drain with your heel.

Never with the ball of your foot. The heel!

I am almost embarrassed that I must keep educating such a sizable chunk of the Lush population about matters such as this.

Anyone who wishes to thank me for this and all future insights may donate a year long Gold subscription to a friend of your choosing.

What I really want to know is what you ladies do about those annoyingly persistent Tiny.Cotton.Balls... angry7

If ya can't beat 'em... pay someone to do it for you.
Ruthie
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 3:23:30 PM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 10/21/2010
Posts: 2,176
Location: United States
DikDango wrote:
A Simple question, when you have finished at the loo, do you fold or scrunch the toilet paper?


I usually hide it.
hornyforUnow
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 4:43:51 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 12/17/2012
Posts: 9
Location: United States
fold it..... But my big bitch is why cant she put the seat back up when she is done
sprite
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 4:51:18 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 13,640
Location: My Tower, United States
hornyforUnow wrote:
fold it..... But my big bitch is why cant she put the seat back up when she is done


hornyforUnow
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 5:41:23 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 12/17/2012
Posts: 9
Location: United States
thats awesome
Coco
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 5:49:12 PM

Rank: Story Lover

Joined: 7/22/2011
Posts: 4,108
Location: Fantasy City, United States
I don't know why I'm laughing at this thread, this is some funny shit! HAHA

Dancing_Doll wrote:


I don't have a method. I just throw the toilet paper roll on - whether it's over or under is totally up to chance. I'm always surprised that people care one way or another (well, I guess the cat thing is a legit reason).

I'm also a hyper-meticulous - probably a triple or quad wiper. Often I'll finish with a cleansing hygiene wipe too for that sparkling fresh feel.


Always! I always use a cleansing wipe. I carry them with me wherever I go.


Dancing_Doll wrote:

My major pet peeve (way more than toilet seats left up) are men who don't replace toilet paper on the roll. I HATE this. Even worse when I don't live there and have to go searching under the sink or asking for toilet paper because it's gone. Keep it up for the guests in your bathrooms, boys... Don't make me use your bathtowel. clown


I've been known to do this and I am not ashamed of this fact. If you don't like it, too damn bad, have the paper handy.

BelleduJour
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 5:50:41 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 1,508
Location: Canada
sprite wrote:


anyone who says otherwise is not only wrong, but they're aliens (and probably don't own cats). :)

Lfunny Lapplause

BelleduJour
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 6:00:22 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 1,508
Location: Canada
Okay, just realized I spelled toilet as toilette - ugh! I guess the French girl in me needed to make her mark kekekegay

CleverFox
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 6:50:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/25/2012
Posts: 463
Location: United States
WellMadeMale wrote:
Pfft... youth ~

You are all obviously rookies.

Anyone over the age of 39 knows that for the best hygiene, one is supposed to defecate during the morning shower...and stomp any particulate matter that won't dissolve in the scalding, high pressure shower spray - down the drain with your heel.

Never with the ball of your foot. The heel!

I am almost embarrassed that I must keep educating such a sizable chunk of the Lush population about matters such as this.

Anyone who wishes to thank me for this and all future insights may donate a year long Gold subscription to a friend of your choosing.

What I really want to know is what you ladies do about those annoyingly persistent Tiny.Cotton.Balls... angry7


WMM, you are such a hillbilly, ROFL.

As a scientist I would usually propose a double blind experiment to find out whether folding or scrunching works better but I am not touching this with a 10 foot pole.
kylie_kained
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 7:25:21 PM

Rank: Detention Seeker

Joined: 8/17/2010
Posts: 994
Location: Over your Knee Screaming and Kicking!, United King
BelleduJour wrote:
Okay, just realized I spelled toilet as toilette - ugh! I guess the French girl in me needed to make her mark kekekegay


The idea of toilet paper is surely to make sure your clean and not leave marks?
















VanGogh
Posted: Wednesday, May 22, 2013 8:53:01 PM

Rank: Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado

Joined: 2/10/2012
Posts: 2,762
Location: Vancouver, Canada

I'm a free spirit ... scrunch / fold when the mood takes me.

Though, I am with Sprite on the anal-aspect of the roll flows from the top, not the bottom (cats!!)

I just WISH some people would have some type of toilet etiquette and FLUSH after use, for god sakes!!

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Guest
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 7:36:13 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,672
I fold for the first wipe and scrunch for the second. The toilet paper has to be over, not under and the toilet seat must be put down after every use. The toilet seat issue is just one of those things you don't argue with a woman over. It's a potential relationship killer! Men, just out the damned seat down.

This also seems like a good place for me to have my hand washing rant. It pisses me off when I see folks washing their hands improperly. You see, a lot of people put the soap in their hands and then wet them, thereby washing the soap away and not getting a proper lather. What should be done is the hands wet first, then soap applied, lathered and then rinsed thoroughly. The hand washing doesn't stop there though. Some folk just take a small swipe at the towel and then wipe the rest on their jeans. Make sure you also dry properly, getting right into all the wee nooks and crannies. Getting this correct is of utmost importance. Though, if you've got no bog roll, it's fine to forgo the washing and drying until you get a clean towel in there: You never know who's been wiping what on that damned towel.

Stay clean y'all.
overmykneenow
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 10:36:23 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/8/2010
Posts: 968
Location: United Kingdom
What about those mucky girls who wipe their asses by reaching through their legs rather than reaching around the back?

Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.

Why not read some stories instead
crazydiamond
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 1:15:50 PM

Rank: Clever Gem

Joined: 7/17/2011
Posts: 2,285
Location: Exactly where I should be!, Canada
overmykneenow wrote:
What about those mucky girls who wipe their asses by reaching through their legs rather than reaching around the back?


Only bloody YOU would know this! hahahaha bunny

Shylass
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 1:21:15 PM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,591
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
crazydiamond wrote:


Only bloody YOU would know this! hahahaha bunny


I was going to ask him, what about the mucky lads who don't wipe at all, but just turn their pants inside out the next day? bootyshake


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

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crazydiamond
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 1:24:33 PM

Rank: Clever Gem

Joined: 7/17/2011
Posts: 2,285
Location: Exactly where I should be!, Canada
Shylass wrote:


I was going to ask him, what about the mucky lads who don't wipe at all, but just turn their pants inside out the next day? bootyshake


haha yeah i was silently avoiding that one confused1

any woman who've done laundry, with men in a household, has had to wonder about this fucking messed up phenomenon.



Nikki703
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 2:33:28 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 12,329
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
I am more of a wrapper. I just wrap it around my hand a few times. But I still use way too much TP. Better to use too much than too little, right? I am very anal (no pun intended) when it comes to hygiene.

And as far as OVER or UNDER, totally by chance
Poppet
Posted: Thursday, May 23, 2013 4:24:39 PM

Rank: Sweetest Cricket

Joined: 10/5/2012
Posts: 5,145
Location: You Inspire Me, United States
sprite wrote:
when you come home to an entire roll of TP that's torn up and strewn from the bathroom to the kitchen, you'll get it. :)


I use to own cats, never had the issue, but it reminds me that the window in my bathroom gets the best "breeze" and I have this issue if I don't put something on my TP. lol

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mr_canuck
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 1:15:55 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 11/18/2012
Posts: 57
Location: Canada
I saw this thread earlier today. I just took a dump and took note that I first fold it and then scrunch it. Anxious
crazydiamond
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 1:32:30 AM

Rank: Clever Gem

Joined: 7/17/2011
Posts: 2,285
Location: Exactly where I should be!, Canada
mr_canuck wrote:
I saw this thread earlier today. I just took a dump and took note that I first fold it and then scrunch it. Anxious


Thanks for the update. TMI bunny

Jack_42
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 2:14:17 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/21/2009
Posts: 978
Location: Prague, Czech Republic
Whilst marrooned in the Libyan desert as a member of the RAF the boredom was so intense that we would have conversations encompassing every subject possible. This thread is reminiscent of those days which to be honest I would rather forget as for years afterwards I would have nightmares that I had returned to a view of a flat horizon with nothing in between in any direction you looked. However it also reminds me of a story about a middle eastern singer of note who wanted to extend her career in the west but found it too disturbing whilst singing to western audiences as she thought of them all using (in her opinion) the disgusting procedure of using toilet paper.
popyourcherry
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 3:14:36 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/17/2010
Posts: 1,146
Those who write on toilet walls
roll their shit in little balls.
Those who read these words of wit
eat those little balls of shit.

Sirene_Jaune
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 3:31:11 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/6/2011
Posts: 771
Location: In my mind, Australia
I scrunch or fold. You can be like Miranda Sings who shows you how to use Toilet Paper.





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Jack_42
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 5:13:05 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/21/2009
Posts: 978
Location: Prague, Czech Republic
This takes toilet humour to a new dimension. But I don't think I want to go there.
emersonbosworth
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 6:24:56 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/9/2013
Posts: 230
Location: United States
I first read this on a shithouse wall in the train station in Spokane, Wa in 1952

popyourcherry wrote:
Those who write on toilet walls
roll their shit in little balls.
Those who read these words of wit
eat those little balls of shit.

SeaCreature
Posted: Friday, May 24, 2013 8:30:58 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 11/30/2009
Posts: 42
Location: United States
This thread completely dismisses the people who use the necks of geese and swans.
trinket
Posted: Monday, May 27, 2013 8:03:01 AM

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hornyirishman
Posted: Monday, May 27, 2013 8:30:48 AM

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Location: Where the ladies live, United States
Wait, What about the three sea shells? No one mentioned the sea shells!

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