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Is Fantasising the same as cheating? Options · View
GunGirlJess
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 5:37:42 PM

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God, I sure hope not, or I'm a raging cheating whore bag!!!
1LovelyKinkyKitsune
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 6:05:20 PM

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Unlike what the person said above me, I am NOT, lol, what she said (even jokingly said). I don't have my thoughts drift to another man. I'm not saying it isn't normal, though, and I know many people do even when reading or watching a movie or looking at a magizine (not to mention porn and things), whether or not it is a real person, someone you know, or someone you make up in your mind, or a celebrity, etc. I guess it is cheating mentally but not physically. People can argue that all they may, but if you are married for a long time and the only thing that gets you going is the thought of someone elses face and you no longer think of your spouse while makimg love to them, then that is still sad. I feel like lotality goes beyond the most obvious action, it may or may not be different, and some may not count it, but it counts for something with me.

BadGirl76
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 6:14:31 PM

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Your imagination is your imagination, nothing more and nothing less. If thoughts were policed, we would all be in jail. I don't think there is a person in the world, that is of age, that has not fantasized about someone. No mater if you are in a relationship or not, as long as you don't act on them with another person then how can it be cheating.

I personally share my fantasies with my hubby and he with me. Sometimes it leads to role play and most of the time to better sex. Share your fantasies and what you like with your partner.

It all comes down to communication.

...I thought that maybe a new life, a different life, wouldn’t be so bad. But where the hell did I put the receipt, and could you return something that was over twenty years old? Where do you go to get a new life when your old one has you so puzzled you don’t know how to fix it? Wish I knew.
-Anita Blake

Newest stories: The Trials of First Love
GunGirlJess
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 6:15:50 PM

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Fantasizing is one thing, and not just defined as 'the only thing that gets you going' or even necessarily something that you do while you are with your current partner (thinking about someone else). It can happen at any time of the day or night, with or without your partner present, and it can even be ABOUT your partner. Especially if there are things that you WISH your partner would do but they won't. Thinking about them doing things with you/to you (whether they actually will or not)
It doesn't exclusively mean that you are thinking of anyone and everyone BUT your partner. And it sure doesn't only mean that you are laying there pretending someone else is f*cking you. ;)

1HornyHungryOkami
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 6:16:48 PM

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Joined: 3/5/2014
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1LovelyKinkyKitsune wrote:
Unlike what the person said above me, I am NOT, lol, what she said (even jokingly said). I don't have my thoughts drift to another man. I'm not saying it isn't normal, though, and I know many people do even when reading or watching a movie or looking at a magizine (not to mention porn and things), whether or not it is a real person, someone you know, or someone you make up in your mind, or a celebrity, etc. I guess it is cheating mentally but not physically. People can argue that all they may, but if you are married for a long time and the only thing that gets you going is the thought of someone elses face and you no longer think of your spouse while makimg love to them, then that is still sad. I feel like lotality goes beyond the most obvious action, it may or may not be different, and some may not count it, but it counts for something with me.


Maybe it depends to some people and I do like what you said My baby and I have to agree on what you posted. I do think it depends on the persons mind, but you know me how I fantasize about you everyday I dont think of anyone, but you lol. ;) <3

drillsarge2
Posted: Monday, May 05, 2014 7:19:06 PM

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This really depends on your worldview. Start by defining the backdrop for cheating - that we are in a committed relationship with another. Then worldview is critical. In the Christian worldview the answer is yes if you are thinking about making it with another rather than your spouse (or your "common law" spouse). The gospel is so specific - just thinking about another (lust) is considered the same as actually having sex with the fantasy partner. Of course, in this worldview the whole point is recognizing that we are not capable of being "without sin" on our own. Since I call myself a Christian and I am on this website, I recognize I am failing on a regular basis...sobering.
Guest
Posted: Thursday, May 08, 2014 6:32:30 AM

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of course not.
purpleshade
Posted: Thursday, May 08, 2014 8:41:26 AM

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Reprehensiballs wrote:
If I have a fantasy about great sex with an imaginary (or even real) girl, is that cheating?


If you fantasise about eating a cream cake, you get all the pleasure, but you will not put on any calories.

If you fantasise about other women, you will get pleasure, but none of the risk associated with extra marital or adulterous affairs!.....

X.
Elyouseewhy
Posted: Thursday, May 08, 2014 1:07:04 PM

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No, cheating is when you cheat on somebody, fantasising is about experiencing a pleasure or other feeling using the power of the mind.
Guest
Posted: Thursday, May 08, 2014 9:11:02 PM

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I dont believe so. Its healthy to imagine and to feel pleasure from outside thoughts. Having a fantasy isnt always based on sex and yet we call them dreams and they seem to be accepted by the masses. I suppose its a individual choice to know where you draw the line, but for me when involving a fantasy and sharing it with another in chat its fine.
asleep
Posted: Thursday, May 08, 2014 9:31:16 PM

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I can have a fantasy and perhaps share it here on LUSH...but that (**&^& skillet would bust my head open if my wife knew.

http://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/exit-33-trust.aspx

captainkirkland
Posted: Wednesday, May 14, 2014 7:34:00 PM

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Fantasizing is a natural part of being a human being.
Sthrnfire85
Posted: Wednesday, May 21, 2014 2:13:29 PM

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If it is then im screwed.
ericahope
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 2:34:51 AM

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Reprehensiballs wrote:
My wife and I both have fantasies yet have remained (physically at least) faithful for the last 25 years. I just wondered about people's take on this.


In my opinion, the thing that makes something "cheating" is that you're going behind your partner's back against his or her wishes. So if your wife doesn't mind that you fantasize about things that don't involve her, it's not cheating.

I hope I've interpreted your question correctly, because it appears some other people are interpreting it differently. They've answered it as if you wanted to know whether fantasizing about someone other than your partner is morally wrong or whether fantasizing about someone other than your partner will/could create problems in your relationship.

Answering that "fantasizing is natural and normal and we all do it; therefore it's not cheating" doesn't really answer the question (not to mention it's illogical). There are lots of things that come naturally to us that we all do that aren't okay. Being greedy or prideful is natural, but it doesn't make it morally acceptable.
dpw
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 5:11:49 AM

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WSCLG wrote:
Is fantasizing the same as cheating? For the most part, I have to say no. But, it depends to an extent. If all you do is fantasize about others whilst making love to your partner, then it kind of means you're not into them so much. At that point I would recommend you take a step back and think about what it is you really want versus what you have. Amazingly, most people realize that what they have is way better than any fantasy.

Now - having said that - if you and your partner fantasize together, well then - relax and enjoy the ride, eh?

This is by far the best post.
If you fantasise about being with someone else, you are cheating. You're partner assumes that you are having sex with them. If you're thinking of somebody else that's cheating them of the truth.
If you are fantasising about your partner, that is fine.
GingerCat
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 7:12:53 AM

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I don't think it is cheating. As long as you make no effort to act on those fantasies it definitely isn't cheating.
B0swell0x
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 8:03:11 AM

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So define the difference between dreaming and fantasising?
Leigh65
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 2:32:33 PM

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Location: Atlanta, United States
It can be, yes...it depends on your mindset. Do you admit your fantasies or keep them secret from your lover?
Magical_felix
Posted: Sunday, May 25, 2014 2:43:56 PM

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Joined: 4/3/2010
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Location: California
No it's not the same as cheating. Fantasizing is normal and everyone does it.

Where it gets troublesome though is if your partner or yourself is fantasizing about the same person every time they/you think about sex. Your partner may not be physically cheating but if there is another person they are constantly thinking about then you have a bit of a problem in your relationship, especially if this person is someone your partner interacts with. I know that if I was constantly thinking about another girl instead of the girl I was with then I would feel like I was faking it with my partner and it's really not fair to them. I would feel very guilty.







BluOrchd
Posted: Tuesday, June 03, 2014 3:40:30 PM

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Nope, that's why it's called fantasizing
Barrone
Posted: Tuesday, June 03, 2014 4:50:46 PM

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LOL No Way!! Is fantasizing about cheating cheating?LOL

Swimming in my pond, waiting for some Lush Lovelies:) I'm Sexy, and I Know It!!
Barrone
Posted: Tuesday, June 03, 2014 4:53:17 PM

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I love your luscious lips Blue Orchd:) Mmmm...fantasizing:)

Swimming in my pond, waiting for some Lush Lovelies:) I'm Sexy, and I Know It!!
Loves_to_Lick25
Posted: Thursday, June 05, 2014 11:28:34 AM

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no fantasys are great
Feisty
Posted: Thursday, June 05, 2014 4:11:09 PM

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Location: Central Coast, United States
That would make all of us cheaters wouldn't it? Everybody fantasizes at some point. Seems like a silly question to me.
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