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Really bad poetry - how to guide Options · View
Kylie69
Posted: Thursday, February 01, 2007 8:32:38 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 12/15/2006
Posts: 13
Here's a guide to writing bad poetry - help

I like this guy's writing too - v funny: http://reallybadpoetry.livejournal.com/
CaptainPants
Posted: Friday, February 02, 2007 9:37:23 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 1/21/2007
Posts: 19
Why would anyone want to learn how to write bad poetry? There's enough out there already!

Fun post though!
SusanEngland
Posted: Sunday, March 04, 2007 2:04:28 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/21/2007
Posts: 458
Location: England
Hi Kylie - an interesting and amusing site - thanks.
I've never tried writing poetry - seems a very difficult and at times ethereal medium
What struck me about several of them was that the writers seemed to think that writing short statements equalled writing poetry. Not that I know anything about it. Just a thought.
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Guest
Posted: Thursday, May 05, 2011 6:39:53 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,672
This needs to be a sticky post! And anyone wishing to post poetry should be required to read this prior to...I guess I was always taught that unless you were born in Shakespeare era, leave rhyming for songs. Whether this is true or not, I now have a difficult time reading rhythmic poetry.
Unfortunately for me, I am guilty of writing short statements and then hoping it will magically turn into good poetry. sigh...I guess I'd better go back and start editing my poems. :-)
thanks for sharing!
Guest
Posted: Thursday, May 05, 2011 8:26:58 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,672
"This poem is not so much a train wreck or a car accident as it is that scene in "Armageddon" when a piece of the giant asteroid destroys downtown Paris."

Now that, is funny.
DirtyMartini
Posted: Thursday, May 05, 2011 9:38:59 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,722
Location: Right here on Lush Stories...
You know, I checked out that "how to" guide to writing bad poetry in the first link...

Just want to mention that no guide to writing really bad poetry is complete without mention of text speak in poems...

You know..."2b or not 2b" or "u r so beautiful 2 me"...

And yes, I have seen it...I have to admit I'm on a few poetry sites as well...and if you really want to see the written equivalent of an asteroid hitting Paris check out some poetry sites sometime...

And the second link, with Professor Roy and his Amazingly Bad Poetry Journal I just happened to check to make sure none of mine were mentioned...

I have to say...so far, so good...icon_smile


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Jillicious
Posted: Thursday, May 05, 2011 10:44:06 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/28/2009
Posts: 1,292
Location: United States
Quote:
"Vogon poetry is the third worst in the Universe. The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent, of his poem, Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning, four of his audience members died of internal hemorrhaging, and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council, survived by gnawing one of his own legs off... The very worst poetry in the universe died along with its creator, Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Sussex...

--Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy


I doubt anyone could beat the awfulness of Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings.
DirtyMartini
Posted: Thursday, May 05, 2011 10:52:37 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,722
Location: Right here on Lush Stories...
Jillicious wrote:


I doubt anyone could beat the awfulness of Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings.


I wasn't familiar, so I had to look it up...
http://waitingfordorothy.blogspot.com/2005/05/worst-poetry-in-universe.html


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
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nicola
Posted: Friday, May 06, 2011 6:52:58 PM

Rank: Matriarch

Joined: 12/6/2006
Posts: 24,877
Location: Sydney, Australia
Priceless laughing9
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