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Why do the nice guys always get passed over when girls are looking for a guy? Options · View
Redwolf
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 8:34:52 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/27/2009
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Location: NothWest, Indiana
OK, girls why do most girls pass over the nice guy for a bad boy?

Carpe Diem

Red out
Catnip
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 9:28:53 AM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
Hm...
Don't know... I've always prefered the not so very bad guys.
Infact I've never ever hooked up with an arse...
Though I've always been around the lads and know very little about girls.Think

Anyhow it might be the fact that the bad boys tell you they'll make your dreams come true while the nice ones say they will try.

OrionTat
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 2:19:46 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/9/2008
Posts: 312
:: walks away from this tread like a ticking time bomb ::

Red you must have missed before when someone else brought up this topic or one similar. You won't find a good answer here. You have Landed in the one place in the world where every woman picks the nice guy. Weirdest and hardest to achieve demographic group every. LOL
Guest
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 3:05:59 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
It's not necessarily that I like "bad" boys but, I like a man that's a real man and not some simpering whiner. He has to have strength of character, muscles in his brain as well as his arms and use both. Never or rarely show fear. If he does something whether right or wrong take responsibility for it. Jesus, I don't have enough room to put all the reasons here.
Redwolf
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 4:37:51 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/27/2009
Posts: 1,008
Location: NothWest, Indiana
Thank you all for the replies.

Carpe Diem

Red out
Catnip
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 9:35:23 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
Hihi
They all have long hair when I leave them and most likely a beard.
I have my standards, if they dont look like it when I meet them they sure
(even though I never try to turn them into it)
all look like members of Dr. Hook, when Im done!


Lisa
Posted: Sunday, April 05, 2009 11:41:25 PM

Rank: Moderator

Joined: 3/3/2009
Posts: 5,190
Location: Victoria, Australia
Maybe women with self-esteem issues choose abusive bad boys, because they don't feel like they deserve to be treated any better. Or they could just be after a project and want to see if they can be the first woman to change him.

Bad boys seem like they'd be high maintenance to me, but I haven't been out with one before. Maybe I'm missing out!
Zafia
Posted: Monday, April 06, 2009 8:37:11 AM

Rank: Lush Legend

Joined: 4/13/2008
Posts: 5,209
Location: Shoe Heaven
I'm with you Lisa.....toast

"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."





Guest
Posted: Monday, April 06, 2009 11:36:44 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
chicks dig bad boys because they want to be the one that changes them...they exciting and non boring etc etc...I've had both bad boys and good boys...the trick is to find a good guy with a hint of wickedness(like mine)
Guest
Posted: Monday, April 06, 2009 1:33:12 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
Redwolf wrote:
OK, girls why do most girls pass over the nice guy for a bad boy?


are you a nice guy, Red??
smiler77
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 12:33:21 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 12/11/2008
Posts: 172
Location: United Kingdom
chefkathleen wrote:
It's not necessarily that I like "bad" boys but, I like a man that's a real man and not some simpering whiner. He has to have strength of character, muscles in his brain as well as his arms and use both. Never or rarely show fear. If he does something whether right or wrong take responsibility for it. Jesus, I don't have enough room to put all the reasons here.


Spot on!!! The nice guys that get overlooked at times.. are sometimes the mousy type... nothing to do with them being too nice.. there's no such thing.. in my opinion anyhow.


A Professional Writer is an amateur who didn't quit"
DBarclay
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 11:18:01 AM

Rank: Mr Nobody

Joined: 2/28/2008
Posts: 946
Location: Florida, United States
Bad boys ..umm Some of the Brit here will know who The Kray Twins were...
After being sentenced for life ... they received hundred of letters a day from women
wanting to know them better ...as most convicted killers do ...


Guest
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 12:06:53 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
But Ronnie was gay!!!
DBarclay
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 12:25:56 PM

Rank: Mr Nobody

Joined: 2/28/2008
Posts: 946
Location: Florida, United States
Loislane wrote:
But Ronnie was gay!!!

correct ..but that never stopped the letters arriving
they though they could change him ...
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 1:18:58 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
Like the menendez brothers here. One of them ended up getting married in prison.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 1:27:44 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 534,748
I find that weird..why would you want to marry someone in prison...people are weird
Zafia
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 2:07:02 PM

Rank: Lush Legend

Joined: 4/13/2008
Posts: 5,209
Location: Shoe Heaven
chefkathleen wrote:
Like the menendez brothers here. One of them ended up getting married in prison.


Exactly that was still crazy to me....I mean I like a bad boy every now and then but I draw the line at murderers....LOL!


Very well said Lexykins....hello1

"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."





Catnip
Posted: Tuesday, April 07, 2009 2:11:32 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
"noone is understanding him."
"there's more to a person than his actions"
"we could be like bonnie and clyde" <----my thoughts xD
The things going on in a womans head when she decides she wants a convicted man is most likely, in my opinion, that she either wants to find out what goes on in that persons mind and her interest in the "dark" side of the humanity makes her think she loves the man, or might aswell cause her to do so in an honest way, or she's tired of living her everyday life with her everyday people, everyday job everyday everything and thinks that if she gets someone who do thoose dangerous things she will be living on the edge and for once feel that she actually is alive.

But, what would I know... *cough* I've never been interested in anyone imprisoned.

fetishdoll
Posted: Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:42:41 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 3/10/2007
Posts: 42
Location: United States
Because the bad boys have hot girlfriends who like to make out while they are dancing in order to turn him on...make out with another girl that is.

Oh sorry, not the answer you are looking for. evil4

Seriously though, I have a great book for you "Meeting the Master" by Elissa Wald. It remains one of my all-time favorite books on submission to this day. The very first story in, "The Initiation" is about a woman who falls in love with a very strong and confident "Nice guy" but half way through she starts to get obsessed with trying to make him be bad. Finally she starts to fall for a bully that her boyfriend is enemies with. What is so fantastic about these stories?

First, there is almost no sex in any of the stories yet I find them extremely erotic.
Second, it's an almost clear window into the mind of a woman who CRAVES submission.

I agree with all the statements in this post but you are all strong, confident, and beautiful women. I would dare to guess that none of you have even a remote problem with finding a man (or woman). If you do it's only because men are morons (no offense) Whistle
But, generally speaking, men like submissive women and submissive women, generally speaking, like assholes. Elissa does a fantastic job of opening that mind up to the reader in her stories. I've read her book several times and found myself amazed at her talent and her ability to reach inside that mind and explore all the aspects of submissiveness.

Also watch "The Secretary", another amazing view into the mind of a submissive woman, written by a woman and I think directed by a woman as well. You'll like it, there are boobies in the movie (watches all the men rushing out to netflix).

I feel it's important to note that real submission doesn't mean abuse. It's a horrible world out there for those who think differently. I think that's part of why I like both of the above. Both women ultimately explore what it's like to be submissive in a world that doesn't understand that behavior. I find that both of the above do an excellent job of taking the uninitiated down the confused and often heartbreaking road of a submissive in an abusive and terrifying world.

Anyway, sort of got off topic a little but I think you'll find some answers there.

* bows head and awaits my spanking *
fetishdoll
Posted: Friday, April 10, 2009 7:51:03 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 3/10/2007
Posts: 42
Location: United States
Sorry I confused you. It's pretty simple, I was talking to the women who have replied to the original post when I said,
"I agree with all the statements in this post but you are all strong, confident, and beautiful women. I would dare to guess that none of you have even a remote problem with finding a man (or woman). If you do it's only because men are morons (no offense)"
They've all said things (hince the "all the statements") that I think are true but they are all strong confident and beautiful women so of course they would be attracted to a strong, confident, and intelligent man. However when it comes to why some women like aggressive and even "bad boys", I thought it would be a good idea to look into the minds of some women who have written about it. SOOOOO, then I went into suggesting the book and movie. I thought it was pretty clear but I guess it wasn't. Sorry I lost ya.

Cheers!
jimyzgrl
Posted: Friday, April 10, 2009 7:55:59 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 3/24/2009
Posts: 21
Red, speaking for myself, I am with a bad boy, who is actually on parol from prison right now. Why? You will ask next, but the fact is, that he was nice to me. But he is a bad ass. I think most of what first attracted me to him (besides his looks and not to sound shallow), but was his confidence. He carried himself strong. But yet he does treat me like a princess, so I can say, he is a nice guy too right?? I don't think its the whole acting like a dick to women that attracts them. I think its confidence. You can take an average guy, but if he's got confidence in himself, I'm sure women everywhere are crawling all over him....

I don't know,,,those are just my thoughts...

I'm new to this forum thing, hope didn't offend anyone. I really like it on this site!

hello2
Zafia
Posted: Friday, April 10, 2009 8:39:45 AM

Rank: Lush Legend

Joined: 4/13/2008
Posts: 5,209
Location: Shoe Heaven
Welcome Jimysgrl and thanks for sharing you make a very interesting point.....confidence is key

hello2

"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."





MMonroe
Posted: Friday, April 10, 2009 6:20:19 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/10/2009
Posts: 1,893
Location: United Kingdom
I agree with Jimysgrl. 'Bad boys' tend to be more confident, sure of themselves, can look after themselves and you. I like to feel protected by my fella. I also like that he sticks out from the crowd, is his own person and doesnt care what others think.

I'm hoping that the guy i'm with at the minute is all these things whilst still being a 'nice guy'. we'll see!



*Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?*



AppleOfYourEye
Posted: Saturday, April 11, 2009 1:27:03 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/19/2008
Posts: 101
Location: Pacific Ocean
I've dated one great guy, a lil rough around the edges but still a total gentleman, the rest have been jerks in disguise as good guys. I'm not really the thrill seeker or a very daring woman, so dating someone who was that way probably wouldn't be the best thing for me or him. But to be fair I think the reverse happens too, men tend to pass over the nice/good women as well. I was even told one time that I am great wife material but not good girlfriend material. I never understood that (if anyone does please let me know what that means).

Any woman who wants the real deal wont care if the guy is a bad boy or a nice guy she will see him for what he is and be accepting of him, good and bad.



Apple
mrplow
Posted: Sunday, April 12, 2009 6:04:28 PM

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Joined: 1/5/2007
Posts: 1,030
Location: Here and now
I want to see Lexy get in the bath with fetishdoll.
Rembacher
Posted: Sunday, April 12, 2009 6:35:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/16/2008
Posts: 1,106
AppleOfYourEye wrote:
I was even told one time that I am great wife material but not good girlfriend material. I never understood that (if anyone does please let me know what that means).

As a nice guy. I've been given similar lines. "You'd be a great guy, I feel safe with you" and shit like that. Its always followed by, but you're not right for me. Then she goes to some jackass who doesn't seem to care about her. But any girl that says that still wants to be friends, because they like that I listen to them, and care about them. It seems like they want it both ways. And as the nice guy, I'm supposed to go along with that.

Anyway, thats my rant for this topic.
Redwolf
Posted: Wednesday, April 15, 2009 8:33:19 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/27/2009
Posts: 1,008
Location: NothWest, Indiana
Thanks everyone

As a nice guy. I'm still confident and out going but the bad boy thing just evades me. I think that people should be who they are and not try to be something they aren't.




Carpe Diem

Red out
Catnip
Posted: Wednesday, April 15, 2009 8:36:54 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
Well said, Red.
Though it is always the struggle with knowing who you are.
Especially if your image is that you are what you wanted to be.
"Catnip...stop confusing yourself and others."
"Sorry."


Redwolf
Posted: Wednesday, April 15, 2009 8:44:28 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/27/2009
Posts: 1,008
Location: NothWest, Indiana
Well if you know who you are and what you are, It makes life worth living, and if others don't like it well it is there loss.


Carpe Diem

Red out
southernman
Posted: Friday, April 17, 2009 11:48:29 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 3/24/2008
Posts: 11
Just because a woman has one doesn't mean that she wants another (I'll be nice and say "vagina").clapping
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