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Guest
Posted: Sunday, August 02, 2009 9:12:32 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127
Three blind mice, see how they run
Where the hell are they going?


~Adapted from Andrew Dice Clay
Guest
Posted: Monday, August 03, 2009 3:28:40 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127
I was in bed one night dreaming
when a light came through my window gleaming
I woke with a start
and had a great fart
while the tooth fairy gave me a reaming
Catnip
Posted: Tuesday, November 10, 2009 5:54:12 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
Many the stories have been.
Bout a lady born in sin.
One day in the tub.
Instead of a scrub
she covered her titties with parafin

Charley
Posted: Wednesday, November 11, 2009 4:05:50 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/24/2009
Posts: 364
There was a young lady from Ealing,
who had a peculiar feeling,
she laid on her back,
and openned her crack,
and pissed all over the ceiling
Catnip
Posted: Friday, November 13, 2009 5:14:05 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
lol!
awesome charley!

WellMadeMale
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2009 1:11:53 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,289
Location: Cakeland, United States
I once loved a gal name of Deezer
smoking had made her a wheezer
she'd pant during rutting
coughing while slutting
gagging on me, an old geezer.

If ya can't beat 'em... pay someone to do it for you.
Catnip
Posted: Sunday, November 15, 2009 7:24:17 PM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,969
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
Omg!
LOL
Great wellM.
I must say I love daisychain for starting this thread.
I never tried limmericks before and now i write one every second day or so.

Guest
Posted: Wednesday, December 02, 2009 6:18:47 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127
Her name was harvey wall banger
Wore men, like shirts off a hanger
One night she called me daddy
I thought I was a lucky laddie
even more so when I entered her hangar



Milik_Redman
Posted: Thursday, December 03, 2009 3:24:55 PM

Rank: Internet Philosopher

Joined: 8/14/2009
Posts: 4,381
Location: somewhere deep under the Earth, United States
There once was a girl named Ginny
who tried to sell sex from her Mini.
She couldn't relax, as she laid in the back,
and never made a single Penny.

“It is a great thing to know your vices.”
― Marcus Tullius Cicero


My Editors Choice Award Winning Stories.








Milik_Redman
Posted: Thursday, December 03, 2009 3:29:00 PM

Rank: Internet Philosopher

Joined: 8/14/2009
Posts: 4,381
Location: somewhere deep under the Earth, United States
There once was. Man from Nantucket.
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin.
If my ear was a cunt, I would fuck it!

Okay, it ain't mine, but it is a classic!

“It is a great thing to know your vices.”
― Marcus Tullius Cicero


My Editors Choice Award Winning Stories.








Guest
Posted: Wednesday, December 09, 2009 12:26:17 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127
There once was a girl named Danielle
Who soon had me under her spell
As we were having a go, she sucked on my toe
and my innocence all went to hell
WickedShads
Posted: Wednesday, March 24, 2010 5:38:19 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/26/2009
Posts: 1,195
Location: Pennsylvania, United States
She never gets tired of his training.
Her whips always cracks where she's aiming.
Strung from tackle and block
she would pleasure his cock
if the fool would just stop his complaining.


"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
1curiouscat
Posted: Thursday, March 01, 2012 6:33:03 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/25/2011
Posts: 1,144
Location: São Paulo , Brazil
Surfing the Google waves I crashed on Lush
A convoluted place that guarantees a blush.
From down under created
through its member propagated.
but its my secret so shush.





Overwhelming Reality

From Across the Room
Guest
Posted: Thursday, March 01, 2012 7:01:26 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127

There was a boy named Paul
Who went to the New Year’s Ball
He drank too much and fall
Embarrassing himself in front of Doll
Now, he is not getting a call

stephanie
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 11:40:15 AM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 4,871
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland

Upon a Dot Com site called Lush,
I felt an incredible Rush!
When a cute tasty girl
Put my life in a whirl
By sending me shots of her bush!

xx Steph


Imbecile! - de som empire
Si nos efforts te delevraient,
Tes baisers ressuseraient
Le cadavere de ton Wampyr! (Baudelaire.)
(I'll ATTEMPT a free translation...)
"Idiot! Even if our efforts were
To deliver you from Her empire,
Your kisses would bring back to life
The corpse of your beloved Vampire."
EVERYONE WHO SPEAKS FRENCH: "THat isn't quite correct..."
stephanie
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 11:45:28 AM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 4,871
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland


(A TOTALLY silly one!)

Because I suffer from Glaucoma
I'm mostly turned on by Aroma
Though I'm sure that your tits
Would have me in fits
If I could only see them, Ramona!

xx Steph

Imbecile! - de som empire
Si nos efforts te delevraient,
Tes baisers ressuseraient
Le cadavere de ton Wampyr! (Baudelaire.)
(I'll ATTEMPT a free translation...)
"Idiot! Even if our efforts were
To deliver you from Her empire,
Your kisses would bring back to life
The corpse of your beloved Vampire."
EVERYONE WHO SPEAKS FRENCH: "THat isn't quite correct..."
stephanie
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 11:47:46 AM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 4,871
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
The stories I write are not real
And are mostly about what I feel
But if you would like
I'd ride you like a bike
So what do you think of that deal?

xx Steph

Imbecile! - de som empire
Si nos efforts te delevraient,
Tes baisers ressuseraient
Le cadavere de ton Wampyr! (Baudelaire.)
(I'll ATTEMPT a free translation...)
"Idiot! Even if our efforts were
To deliver you from Her empire,
Your kisses would bring back to life
The corpse of your beloved Vampire."
EVERYONE WHO SPEAKS FRENCH: "THat isn't quite correct..."
stephanie
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 11:51:28 AM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 4,871
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
You know that I'm really a Guy
And really incredibly shy
So I write under 'Stephanie'
Who's positively, definitely
Soooooo much more Cuter than I!!

xx Steph

(I'll stop there, I won't better That!!!)clown


Imbecile! - de som empire
Si nos efforts te delevraient,
Tes baisers ressuseraient
Le cadavere de ton Wampyr! (Baudelaire.)
(I'll ATTEMPT a free translation...)
"Idiot! Even if our efforts were
To deliver you from Her empire,
Your kisses would bring back to life
The corpse of your beloved Vampire."
EVERYONE WHO SPEAKS FRENCH: "THat isn't quite correct..."
1curiouscat
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 12:24:19 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/25/2011
Posts: 1,144
Location: São Paulo , Brazil
Your words make me smile
and no Im not in denial.
It took me while to understand
That you were a man,
In fact, one with technique and style.



Overwhelming Reality

From Across the Room
alexmarch
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 1:33:19 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 70
Location: Toronto, Canada
There was a young lass from Alberta,
Who was known as a tease and a flirter,
She'd grab onto your cock,
Turn it hard as a rock,
And then leave it go, and no further.
alexmarch
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 1:50:03 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 70
Location: Toronto, Canada
For twenty-five cents and a drink,
Easy Susie would show you her ink,
A red robin she'd jest,
Was in flight on her breast,
And its nest was below in her pink.
DLizze
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 2:05:23 PM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,552
I wrote several in chapters of George, Isolde, and The Brass Ring Polka Band, but to save all of you the hassle of reading seventeen chapters, here are a few:

A swain with another man’s wive
Assayed to play – nay, to swive.
Her husband came back as he entered her crack
And he’s lucky to still be alive.

A nudist and troglodyte
Kept herself mostly hidden from sight.
But when she went to town, all the people would frown
At her nudity out in plain sight.

A lady who dwelt near a river
Had two guys who would deliver
The goods to her lair, and play with her there
She loved to get all they could give her.


"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
DirtyMartini
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 7:05:34 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,790
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
There once was a site named Lush,
With stories so hot you might blush,
But they're never a bore,
And if you come back for more,
You might cum so hard you will gush.



You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

WellMadeMale
Posted: Wednesday, March 07, 2012 9:59:15 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,289
Location: Cakeland, United States
Was cruising the photos of fine female flesh
Jerking my gerkin to croons of John Tesh
Pic 41 brought a gasp of surprise
With a handful of cock I did recognize
My sister's twisters and crazy fuck eyes

If ya can't beat 'em... pay someone to do it for you.
DirtyMartini
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 12:54:06 AM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,790
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Mary rode in on a llama,
In search of a little drama,
She visited the forum,
But the lack of decorum,
Sent her back home to her mama.





You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

TraceyAmes
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 5:41:23 AM

Rank: Wine Connoisseur

Joined: 6/28/2008
Posts: 162
Location: Hunter Valley, Australia
Nicola, an Australian from Lush
Trimmed her pubes like hair on a brush
While rimming her butt
She called me a slut
Making me sigh with a blush
TraceyAmes
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 5:43:45 AM

Rank: Wine Connoisseur

Joined: 6/28/2008
Posts: 162
Location: Hunter Valley, Australia
An accident quite uncanny
Befell a respectable granny
She sat in her chair
While her false teeth were there
And bit herself right in her fanny
Guest
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 5:58:23 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,127
There was a position called Doggy
Though my mind is a little bit foggy
But with her bent in front
And my cock aimed at her cunt
My mind is getting more and more joggy
alexmarch
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 9:42:17 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 70
Location: Toronto, Canada
I once met a girl down in Dixie,
Who was tiny and built like a pixie,
Asked for cash in advance,
Or no chance down her pants,
And now I know why she's named Trixie.
DirtyMartini
Posted: Thursday, March 08, 2012 5:43:50 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,790
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
A young woman who was hot and whorey,
Decided to submit to Lush a story,
It was so poorly written,
The mods were not smitten,
So much for her fame and glory.



You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

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