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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006
Posts: 327,286
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Three blind mice, see how they run
Where the hell are they going?
~Adapted from Andrew Dice Clay
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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006
Posts: 327,286
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I was in bed one night dreaming
when a light came through my window gleaming
I woke with a start
and had a great fart
while the tooth fairy gave me a reaming
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Rank: Internet Sensation
Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,975
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
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Many the stories have been. Bout a lady born in sin. One day in the tub. Instead of a scrub she covered her titties with parafin
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/24/2009
Posts: 364
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There was a young lady from Ealing,
who had a peculiar feeling,
she laid on her back,
and openned her crack,
and pissed all over the ceiling
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Rank: Internet Sensation
Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,975
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
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lol! awesome charley!
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Rank: Constant Gardener
Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 9,526
Location: Cakeland, United States
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I once loved a gal name of Deezer smoking had made her a wheezer she'd pant during rutting coughing while slutting gagging on me, an old geezer.
 The best thing you can do for your fellow,
next to rousing his conscience, is - not to give him things
to think about, but to wake things up that are in him...
to make him think things for himself - George MacDonald
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Rank: Internet Sensation
Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,975
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
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Omg! LOL Great wellM. I must say I love daisychain for starting this thread. I never tried limmericks before and now i write one every second day or so.
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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006
Posts: 327,286
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Her name was harvey wall banger
Wore men, like shirts off a hanger
One night she called me daddy
I thought I was a lucky laddie
even more so when I entered her hangar
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Rank: Internet Philosopher
Joined: 8/14/2009
Posts: 2,034
Location: somewhere deep under the Earth, United States
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There once was a girl named Ginny who tried to sell sex from her Mini. She couldn't relax, as she laid in the back, and never made a single Penny.
“It is a great thing to know your vices.”
― Marcus Tullius Cicero
. Kelly is beautiful, sexy and willing to do anything... For a price! Kelly's PassionLushstories, the site your Mommy warned you about.
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Rank: Internet Philosopher
Joined: 8/14/2009
Posts: 2,034
Location: somewhere deep under the Earth, United States
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There once was. Man from Nantucket. Whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin. If my ear was a cunt, I would fuck it! Okay, it ain't mine, but it is a classic!
“It is a great thing to know your vices.”
― Marcus Tullius Cicero
. Kelly is beautiful, sexy and willing to do anything... For a price! Kelly's PassionLushstories, the site your Mommy warned you about.
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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006
Posts: 327,286
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There once was a girl named Danielle
Who soon had me under her spell
As we were having a go, she sucked on my toe
and my innocence all went to hell
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 2/26/2009
Posts: 1,195
Location: Pennsylvania, United States
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She never gets tired of his training.
Her whips always cracks where she's aiming.
Strung from tackle and block
she would pleasure his cock
if the fool would just stop his complaining.
"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 4/25/2011
Posts: 1,134
Location: São Paulo , Brazil
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Surfing the Google waves I crashed on Lush A convoluted place that guarantees a blush. From down under created through its member propagated. but its my secret so shush.
Overwhelming RealityFrom Across the Room
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/15/2010
Posts: 2,129
Location: United States
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There was a boy named Paul
Who went to the New Year’s Ball
He drank too much and fall
Embarrassing himself in front of Doll
Now, he is not getting a call
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Rank: Moderator at large
Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 2,912
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
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Upon a Dot Com site called Lush,
I felt an incredible Rush!
When a cute tasty girl
Put my life in a whirl
By sending me shots of her bush!
xx Steph
"I would do anything for love, including the thing Meatloaf won't do... (In fact, I sometimes insist upon it...)"xx SF
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Rank: Moderator at large
Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 2,912
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
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(A TOTALLY silly one!)
Because I suffer from Glaucoma
I'm mostly turned on by Aroma
Though I'm sure that your tits
Would have me in fits
If I could only see them, Ramona!
xx Steph
"I would do anything for love, including the thing Meatloaf won't do... (In fact, I sometimes insist upon it...)"xx SF
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Rank: Moderator at large
Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 2,912
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
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The stories I write are not real
And are mostly about what I feel
But if you would like
I'd ride you like a bike
So what do you think of that deal?
xx Steph
"I would do anything for love, including the thing Meatloaf won't do... (In fact, I sometimes insist upon it...)"xx SF
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Rank: Moderator at large
Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 2,912
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland
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You know that I'm really a Guy And really incredibly shy So I write under 'Stephanie' Who's positively, definitely Soooooo much more Cuter than I!! xx Steph (I'll stop there, I won't better That!!!) 
"I would do anything for love, including the thing Meatloaf won't do... (In fact, I sometimes insist upon it...)"xx SF
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 4/25/2011
Posts: 1,134
Location: São Paulo , Brazil
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Your words make me smile and no Im not in denial. It took me while to understand That you were a man, In fact, one with technique and style.
Overwhelming RealityFrom Across the Room
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 51
Location: Toronto, Canada
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There was a young lass from Alberta,
Who was known as a tease and a flirter,
She'd grab onto your cock,
Turn it hard as a rock,
And then leave it go, and no further.
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 51
Location: Toronto, Canada
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For twenty-five cents and a drink,
Easy Susie would show you her ink,
A red robin she'd jest,
Was in flight on her breast,
And its nest was below in her pink.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,165
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I wrote several in chapters of George, Isolde, and The Brass Ring Polka Band, but to save all of you the hassle of reading seventeen chapters, here are a few:
A swain with another man’s wive
Assayed to play – nay, to swive.
Her husband came back as he entered her crack
And he’s lucky to still be alive.
A nudist and troglodyte
Kept herself mostly hidden from sight.
But when she went to town, all the people would frown
At her nudity out in plain sight.
A lady who dwelt near a river
Had two guys who would deliver
The goods to her lair, and play with her there
She loved to get all they could give her.
"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
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Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,362
Location: Right here on Lush Stories...
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There once was a site named Lush,
With stories so hot you might blush,
But they're never a bore,
And if you come back for more,
You might cum so hard you will gush.
 You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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Rank: Constant Gardener
Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 9,526
Location: Cakeland, United States
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Was cruising the photos of fine female flesh Jerking my gerkin to croons of John Tesh Pic 41 brought a gasp of surprise With a handful of cock I did recognize My sister's twisters and crazy fuck eyes
The best thing you can do for your fellow,
next to rousing his conscience, is - not to give him things
to think about, but to wake things up that are in him...
to make him think things for himself - George MacDonald
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Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,362
Location: Right here on Lush Stories...
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Mary rode in on a llama,
In search of a little drama,
She visited the forum,
But the lack of decorum,
Sent her back home to her mama.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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Rank: Wine Connoisseur
Joined: 6/28/2008
Posts: 141
Location: Hunter Valley, Australia
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Nicola, an Australian from Lush
Trimmed her pubes like hair on a brush
While rimming her butt
She called me a slut
Making me sigh with a blush
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Rank: Wine Connoisseur
Joined: 6/28/2008
Posts: 141
Location: Hunter Valley, Australia
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An accident quite uncanny
Befell a respectable granny
She sat in her chair
While her false teeth were there
And bit herself right in her fanny
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 12/6/2009
Posts: 3,603
Location: Hanging around, Glasgow, United Kingdom
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There was a position called Doggy Though my mind is a little bit foggy But with her bent in front And my cock aimed at her cunt My mind is getting more and more joggy
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 12/25/2011
Posts: 51
Location: Toronto, Canada
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I once met a girl down in Dixie,
Who was tiny and built like a pixie,
Asked for cash in advance,
Or no chance down her pants,
And now I know why she's named Trixie.
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Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,362
Location: Right here on Lush Stories...
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A young woman who was hot and whorey,
Decided to submit to Lush a story,
It was so poorly written,
The mods were not smitten,
So much for her fame and glory.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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