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my girlfriend doesnt let me lick her Options · View
billi90
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 10:47:12 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 4/10/2012
Posts: 4
Location: Norway
hi guys, im new here, and i have been asking around on many forums. my girlfriend doesnt seem to be interested in letting me lick her pussy, any suggestions on how to make her more open about it? please please help me
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:29:06 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 530,465
Doesn't *seem* interested?? Have you actually asked her why she doesn't like it??

Just be gentle and talk about it with her is my advice. If you post the issue here then I am sure you will get some suggestions.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:44:01 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 530,465
I'm sure most people will say "talk about it". As you may know already, communication is key in any relationship, so talk and find out why she doesn't like the idea. She may have had a bad experience in the past that put her off any oral in the future, so my advice is to talk and be understanding about it.
sugarbabe
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 12:15:32 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/30/2010
Posts: 691
Location: northeast, United States
I remember the first time I had that done to me.....
I layed there and I went numb, thinking oh my,
what is he doing?
what does it smell like?
I am laying here by myself while he is down there.
I just looked at the ceiling, stunned, embarrassed,
feeling very vulnerable,
out of the comfort zone.
wishing it was over, can't even remember liking it.
But I was young at that time, he kept doing it over and over
and NOW I can hardly get enough. It took two years but that
act was my first orgasm. soon after that I was having them
during intercourse. Thank gawd he kept trying. Big Hugs


sex is like a joke...it's only good if you get it


Shylass
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 4:43:28 PM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
Like others have said, I would recommend communication - asking (gently) why not. But please respect her if she can't/won't talk about it.

Not every lass likes/loves it, some have bad history, and some have certain aversions to it for various reasons. But you will never know unless you ask and give her the opportunity to tell you. Why not start off by saying why you would like to, and then ask her how she feels about that, before asking her why not? Try not to make it "Why won't you let me", but rather, "I would like to share this with you because..."

Are you able to finger her? Can you get some pleasure from tasting your fingers instead of direct mouth-to-pussy? Is there not some compromise you could come up with depending on how your conversation goes?

Good luck!


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

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billi90
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 3:03:52 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 4/10/2012
Posts: 4
Location: Norway
we had a talk today, when we went to bed. i was kissing her down her tummy and when i reached her "front" she asked me what i am doing, so i told her this is something i think you would enjoy, and she looked at me and then said fine, she let me do it :D later we talked about it, and she said her past boyfriend used to finger her in some weird way and she hated it and was afraid i would do it too, but im not into fingering so its ok :) thank you so much for the advice on talking to her, i love you guys :*
Wolfie22
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 3:22:32 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/1/2010
Posts: 112
Location: United States
Good for you lad, but hey, don't say you aren't into fingering, cause that can change. And trust me, if just have your fingers in her, while you eat her out, you will blow her fucking mind. But don't go all at once man, figure out how she likes it first, just you know play with her pussy while you guys make out or something and get a real feel for it, DON'T try any of those porn star moves for a start, you just might stock the shit out of her, and just become another ex. But if all goes well, one night when you are eating her, try to slip one finger in and see how she reacts, if doesn't like it stop of course, if she likes go for one more. Hell maybe you'll get lucky and she will ask for it. Anyway, best of luck to you in the future and best of luck in your relationship, hope you two have a long one.
Shylass
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:02:40 AM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
billi90 wrote:
we had a talk today, when we went to bed. i was kissing her down her tummy and when i reached her "front" she asked me what i am doing, so i told her this is something i think you would enjoy, and she looked at me and then said fine, she let me do it :D later we talked about it, and she said her past boyfriend used to finger her in some weird way and she hated it and was afraid i would do it too, but im not into fingering so its ok :) thank you so much for the advice on talking to her, i love you guys :*


That's absolutely brilliant! I'm proper chuffed for you (both)! WOOOO! occasion7 occasion7

Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
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Guest
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:37:27 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 530,465
Oh that's poor.
I would say discuss it with her, tell her you love the way she looks and feels and that having that level of imtimacy would be a real wonderful experience for you both to share together.
Good luck man, if it is her self confidence issues, I hope she gets over it.
lucky420
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 9:42:33 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 3/25/2012
Posts: 1
Location: Brooklyn, United States
The girl I lost my virginity to had a similar fear of it. Her reason was that she didn't like the taste. If I had it on my mouth, she wouldn't enjoy kissing me as much. Many years later, when she was in another relationship, I convinced her to "get over it" (that took more than a decade), and once she allowed her current husband to do it, she found out it's actually quite enjoyable. Now she can't get enough. But it probably took her 15 years to come around (and to cum around - that was the first time she orgasmed with a partner as well).

The trick I learned about cunnilingus, when I had a 12-hour lesson from a lesbian, is that it doesn't matter what you think your "technique" is. Every vagina is gloriously unique, and every woman attached to it, even more so. It's not about "to finger or not to finger", it's about what feels right and pleasurable to her. Watch her, and you'll have a good time. I don't mean that you should stare at her with an "Am I doing this right?" look on your face. Watch her hips, see how they roll. Look at her belly to see when she takes a sudden intake of breath. If that was in response to a thing you did, try doing that again. It may not be that you touched a certain part of her, but that you worked up to it in a way that took her breath away. Or, maybe you touched her just right. You can't guess at this - trial and error goes a long way. Be willing to fail, and you'll be better prepared to succeed.

The other trick I've learned is not so much about cunnilingus, as it is about all sex. It's communication. I've had some of my best orgasms in the throes of laughter. Keep talking while you're going down on her. Ask her what she likes. Tell her what you're doing. Every once in a while, stop kissing her there, and kiss her lips, neck, arms, breasts, tummy, ankles, etc. Remind her and yourself why you're doing what you're doing - it's about both of you, and the more you communicate, the more connected you'll feel, and the more fun you'll both have.

Her ex didn't touch her in a bad place (most likely), he touched her in a way that made her uncomfortable. When you touch her, remember that you're touching her, not just a pussy. And don't rule out anything you have available that may be helpful - your tongue isn't that much different from a finger. It's more dextrous and flexible, and self-lubricating, but if you're doing it right, lubrication won't be an issue, and there are parts of her that your tongue just can't reach. When you and she are comfortable enough (or just when you've got her over the moon and everything is exciting), slip a finger in and feel for her g-spot. It's that spongy part right past the first hump inside, on the front wall. Note that at different times, with different stimulation, it's a completely different place, size, and reaction. If you go for it before she's properly worked up, you may not find it at all. Or, you may just make her feel like she has to pee. If you get it at the right moment, you might surprise her with her first squirting orgasm. The trick is not to be goal-oriented. Let it come naturally. What you're doing is a shared experience. And it's more about her than it is you.

Also, careful with that clit, man. A little goes a long way.
Buz
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 9:49:04 AM

Rank: The Linebacker

Joined: 3/2/2011
Posts: 5,686
Location: Atlanta, United States
Wow! I've never come across a girl not wanting to be licked so I am a bit clueless to advice.

Once she's convinced it's all good she'll probably want it all the time. Just keep trying to convince her.

Shylass
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 10:45:27 AM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
Buz wrote:
Wow! I've never come across a girl not wanting to be licked so I am a bit clueless to advice.

Once she's convinced it's all good she'll probably want it all the time. Just keep trying to convince her.


Once I stopped giggling at your first sentence... evil4

For some people, it is not about trying to convince them. It's about finding out why a person doesn't want something, and then working with that, or around it. Some people have real reasons for not wanting something. This is not aimed at you, but why can't people take no for an answer sometimes, just because it is something they want so much? To me, that shows a lack of respect and hearing what the person is telling them. Why can't no mean no?


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
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billi90
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 12:30:48 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 4/10/2012
Posts: 4
Location: Norway
lol im starting to love this site. she let me lick her !!! :D thanks for the help guys, and fingering..uhm i dont know. i feel weird doing it =/
VirginalViet
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 8:08:08 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/4/2012
Posts: 218
Location: United States
Sugarbabe has described it perfectly: "I remember the first time I had that done to me.....
I layed there and I went numb, thinking oh my,
what is he doing?
what does it smell like?
I am laying here by myself while he is down there.
I just looked at the ceiling, stunned, embarrassed,
feeling very vulnerable,
out of the comfort zone.
wishing it was over, can't even remember liking it.
But I was young at that time, he kept doing it over and over
and NOW I can hardly get enough. It took two years but that
act was my first orgasm. soon after that I was having them
during intercourse. Thank gawd he kept trying."

Okay look, let's face it us girls have LOTS of insecurities....we worry about our weight, our height, our lack of height (haha that's me), our boob size (mine are pretty small), our breath, our pussy being too loose, our pussy smelling, etc. etc. Basically the insecurities we have are ENDLESS. So you need to get her to relax and reassure her you love doing it. I'm sure pretty soon she'll be pulling you into the bedroom and demanding your tongue between her legs since it's pretty well one of our favorite activities once we get comfortable with it. Don't worry....just get her to cum a few times and she'll be hooked for ever!
WellMadeMale
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 9:10:59 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,281
Location: Cakeland, United States
billi90 wrote:
hi guys, im new here, and i have been asking around on many forums. my girlfriend doesnt seem to be interested in letting me lick her pussy, any suggestions on how to make her more open about it? please please help me


You might try not being such a groveling beggar.

Go the opposite direction for a change.

You're either pulling our leg or you're hopeless and no amount of advice will help.

I'm betting on the former.

If ya can't beat 'em... pay someone to do it for you.
beowulf69
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 9:18:16 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/24/2011
Posts: 206
Location: Cocoa Beach, United States
Get a new girlfriend.

My first story for Lush is posted, The Goodbye Fuck.
http://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/the-goodbye-fuck.aspx
Shylass
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 9:29:26 PM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
beowulf69 wrote:
Get a new girlfriend.


Seriously? Because she wasn't comfortable with one sexual act? I truly hope that was just a daft joke.

Like I asked, and nobody seems to have picked up on, "Why can't people take no for an answer sometimes, just because it is something they want so much? To me, that shows a lack of respect and hearing what the person is telling them. Why can't no mean no?" I'm all for compromise, but blimey! d'oh!


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
********************************CLICK THE BANNERS TO BUY THESE WILLY-STIFFENING BOOKS!********************************
WellMadeMale
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 9:43:48 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,281
Location: Cakeland, United States
Get a new girlfriend is not bad advice.

There is a need to be compatible in all the best ways possible, Shy...wouldn't you agree?

When we are in our youth...and I classify youth as (below the age allowed to discuss at Lush) til our 50's....

If it ain't working...trade in asap for the best interests of the both of 'you'.

I've been with women who thought that anything besides missionary was perverted. Guess what I did.

Fucking A Straight... get a new girlfriend.

Have you ever been with a man who thought that sex with the lights off and still almost fully clothed - was the proper way?

Get a new fucking boyfriend.

Get real...

If ya can't beat 'em... pay someone to do it for you.
VanGogh
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 9:54:14 PM

Rank: Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado

Joined: 2/10/2012
Posts: 2,996
Location: Vancouver, Canada
WellMadeMale wrote:

There is a need to be compatible in all the best ways possible, Shy...wouldn't you agree?

If it ain't working...trade in asap for the best interests of the both of 'you'.


Life is too damn short to live a vanilla life, of course, maybe some like it ..... to each their own.

But ... I concur WMM ..... be authentic!

PA

A Milf series combined with Office Sex *fans face* .... The Secretary and The Student
starting with The Secretary and The Student - first part

Enjoy!!

For the Anal Lovers .... come enjoy my RR honoured An Alluring Ass

Another Sex in the Office Poem (I know you love those!!) In Your Office

naughtiestmommy
Posted: Saturday, May 05, 2012 10:00:31 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/26/2012
Posts: 197
Location: Coastal, United States
Many women tend to be insecure about their anatomy, definitely, and specially when they are younger. Just as VV stated, a woman tends to worry about everything from how she looks to how she smells, whether the taste will be bad, etc. As women, we are constantly reminded by the media how we don't meet the standards of "female perfection". Imagine that ten-fold when it comes to our vag, especially if she feels you have much more experience than her.

Another factor could be if she was raised in a strict, religious family. That's going to take some considerable deprogramming.

Your girl may need to know that women's genitalia all look different, just like men's. If she's open to looking up pictures online, do that. Talk about it. That's the first part.

Also, get some flavored lube and use that. Put it on her breasts and down along her stomach, and trail it to her genitals. Start licking from the top, and keep telling her how great she tastes (especially once you get between those legs!). Better yet, tell her she tastes better than anything (do NOT say "anyone"; women don't want to be reminded that you used to slut around lol) you've ever experienced before.

Maybe even take a shower together, if she's open to it. Hell, try going down on her in the shower.

.
.

I'm a loner, Dottie. A Rebel...
.
.

Shylass
Posted: Sunday, May 06, 2012 12:58:12 PM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
WellMadeMale wrote:
Get a new girlfriend is not bad advice.

There is a need to be compatible in all the best ways possible, Shy...wouldn't you agree?

When we are in our youth...and I classify youth as (below the age allowed to discuss at Lush) til our 50's....

If it ain't working...trade in asap for the best interests of the both of 'you'.

I've been with women who thought that anything besides missionary was perverted. Guess what I did.

Fucking A Straight... get a new girlfriend.

Have you ever been with a man who thought that sex with the lights off and still almost fully clothed - was the proper way?

Get a new fucking boyfriend.

Get real...


Yes of course I would say if things can't work where both people are happy, get a new partner.

But it is quite clear from what the original poster said, that what was lacking, was communication and therefore understanding. That has been resolved.

I suppose my monumental fault is in the fact that I read this making the assumption that the OP actually cared about making his relationship work, despite the fact that there was a problem. I was thinking along the lines of people who love their partner and want to stay in their relationship, rather than just wanting to be sexually compatible in every single act they want to do.

Forgive me for my narrow view on the subject, I don't have the experience that everybody else here seems to. But I like to think that somebody would care enough about me to find a compromise where something went wrong or in something I couldn't manage to do, just as I would want to for my partner. I'm the kind of person who prefers, or at least attempts, to work around things and find fun alternatives, rather than just dump them. I like to think I would be understanding if a man wouldn't let me do something I wanted to because he was treated badly in his past and/or his state of health, just as I would hope he would be kind enough to do that for me. If there was something he couldn't tell me, I like to think I would give him the time to find the courage to share it with me, again, as I hope he would do for me.

I suppose it all boils down to priorities and how much you like a person. Sorry for both not being clear, and not thinking the same way as you. But I still stand by what I said.


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
********************************CLICK THE BANNERS TO BUY THESE WILLY-STIFFENING BOOKS!********************************
birsha
Posted: Monday, May 14, 2012 3:43:59 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 5/14/2012
Posts: 9
I understand her feelings myself, if she's anything like me. I LOVE LOVE LOVE being fingered. But I'm not a fan of a guy going down on me. In that situation I'm entirely too sensitive. It makes me want to scream and not in a good way. Similarly when having sex I don't want my clit touched. It's just too much at the same time.
scotty792
Posted: Friday, November 02, 2012 1:45:04 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 9/26/2012
Posts: 78
Location: Central Coast, , Australia
One young girl I knew loved me going down on her but only when she wearing knickers.

While the feel on my mouth on the soft smooth cotton of her knickers made her cum and cum and cum, the feel of it on her naked pussy had no effect on her whatsoever.
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