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How many Lush users have you revealed your real identity to? How did it go? Options · View
naughtiestmommy
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 7:03:48 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/26/2012
Posts: 197
Location: Coastal, United States
As I get to know some of the amazing people here, I am wondering: how many of you have stepped out from behind the comfort of your avatar and revealed your true identity to others and, if you have, how many? How did it work out? What made you feel comfortable with that?




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I'm a loner, Dottie. A Rebel...
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Shylass
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 7:19:33 PM

Rank: Gingerbread Lover

Joined: 1/6/2012
Posts: 3,595
Location: Trumpton, United Kingdom
naughtiestmommy wrote:
As I get to know some of the amazing people here, I am wondering: how many of you have stepped out from behind the comfort of your avatar and revealed your true identity to others and, if you have, how many? How did it work out? What made you feel comfortable with that?




Good question!

Five (it sounds like so many!). Something just clicked, they seem like kindred spirits. I really care about them deeply; I count them as real friends. I still don't feel comfortable about it, but it's a risk I am learning to take.


Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
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naughtiestmommy
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 7:22:11 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/26/2012
Posts: 197
Location: Coastal, United States
Shylass wrote:


Good question!

Five (it sounds like so many!). Something just clicked, they seem like kindred spirits. I really care about them deeply; I count them as real friends. I still don't feel comfortable about it, but it's a risk I am learning to take.


No, no...not really. I can totally appreciate that. I have been amazed at the quality of people I've met here so far. I completely understand the kindred spirit concept! Makes me wonder why I waited so long to join!

Thank you for being the first brave one to share. :)

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I'm a loner, Dottie. A Rebel...
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TraceyAmes
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 8:14:28 PM

Rank: Wine Connoisseur

Joined: 6/28/2008
Posts: 162
Location: Hunter Valley, Australia
An excellent question. The vast majority of people here live under a pseudonym, me included. I have revealed my true name to only 3 people here on Lush. Although have some 200 "Friends", there are only 3 people I trust. Trust must be earned and not taken for granted. I correspond with these people very frequently. One of these people lives in Australia and I actually had the pleasure of meeting with and staying with her and her partner 5 weeks ago. I was very apprehensive at first, but through frequent emails and eventually telephone calls, I became more at ease with the situation. I saw it as a situation where I could help a person in genuine need, who was crying out for help. Bit by bit I revealed my real self, my dark secrets and more.
Guest
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 8:57:07 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 531,824
Hmm only 4. The first one went great, until they stopped coming on Lush as often. The second one went alright, but I think I would have been treated the same way if I stayed hidden behind my avatar. The third one went really well, we are still getting to know each other but I don't feel too awkward. But the fourth one was the best. We are currently great friends and even talk on the phone. It was nice to meet someone who sees me more than my avatar.
Guest
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 8:59:07 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 531,824
what you see is what you get. i am a real person and i am100% real on here. i dont use a fake name what you see on my profile is 100% real.
littlemissbitch
Posted: Monday, April 30, 2012 9:13:20 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/6/2011
Posts: 776
Location: the land of enchantment, United States
im not shy. my name is heather and my hair is really red (although im a blonde at heart) ;)

p.s.. <<<< this is not my ass. but the one in my gallery is! :D

littlemissbitch ~ professional face ripper offer, at your service..
Dancing_Doll
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 7:06:49 AM

Rank: Alpha Blonde

Joined: 2/17/2010
Posts: 6,234
Location: West Coast
Just one person as a complete and total identity reveal. Definitely no regrets there.

I'm close to a handful of friends though that know quite a lot about me and are able to reach me off-site by various means. Of this group none know my real last name but one does have my cell # if she ever needed to use it.

Usually it takes a long time to build trust with me. I've had a serious stalker before (unrelated to this scene), so I'm very cautious/private. Ultimately you have to trust your intuition/gut-instinct on these things though.


Nikki703
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 8:38:35 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 12,625
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
Not quite sure what you mean by true idenity? My real first name? Last name? Address? Phone#? Social Security#? Bank Accts?

Everyone here knows my real first name since it is my screen name, well actually its Nicole. If I have given you my e-mail address, then you know my last name. As far as any other info about me, well none but that could change. I doubt I will ever give out my phone# since I have had a bad experience in the past and it was real scary!

There are several people here I trust very much and have shared a lot with and Im sure I will eventually share even more. I hope they feel the same way about me too.
SITTING
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 8:46:51 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 8/11/2011
Posts: 700
Location: Leeds, United Kingdom
I have told my real first name to one person. Um, I don't think I'd ever share more than that. I am close to quite a few girls on here but I don't see myself ever meeting up with anyone. I think it would be quite scary tbh. You never really know if ANYONE is 'real' online. Everything I say about myself is true, apart from my name, I don't mind people knowing what I look like, or what's happening in my life but I wouldn't ever give my personal email or address out.

Check out my competition entry below!
playsit
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 10:43:38 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/26/2011
Posts: 289
Location: Northeastern Untied Sates, United States
Everyone I message or chat with knows my real first name, but none knows my last. I've only given my email out to a couple friends, but it's a special email just for 'Playsit' and I will not open any attachments. Only one of my friends knows the names of my immediate family members. Everything in my profile is true, so I consider that and offering my first name as "stepping out from behind my avitar".

I'm very comfortable with who I've chosen to know more about me and it's worked out very well. I have one friend here that I feel I can talk to about anything and feel safe that it's just between us. There are a few others I would feel comfortable sharing more of myself with, but don't get the opportunity to chat very often, so the relationship hasn't developed to that point yet.
MMonroe
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 3:21:20 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/10/2009
Posts: 1,893
Location: United Kingdom
I have pictures on my profile for my friends so they all know what I look like and I have only given my real name to a handful, never my last, and I have never said specifically where I live either.

Also I've only given out my email address to one ex-member, and have another added on facebook so we can keep in touch. Other than that, Im very cautious with what i say and i dont know if i would ever go so far as to meet someone in real life



*Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?*



SensualSharon
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 3:39:28 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 4/29/2010
Posts: 98
Location: Canada
I have shown my real pics to a few, and tell real first name to even fewer. No one, not even long term phone partners of 3 yrs knows my last name, there's no need for them to. And if anyone uses an email to contact me, it's under my online name, not real one.

I would never give facebook info to anyone, and even the rare few I have given my phone number to, I usually call them, it's unlisted, so all they would get by reverse look up is my city, and that's no state secret.
Naughtygrl73
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:15:54 PM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 5/21/2011
Posts: 1,413
Location: The Naughty Mansion, Australia
I'm quite open and honest up to a point,
I share my real first name with those on my friends list
I'm happy to share my thoughts and feelings on any subject, so long as the person I'm talking to is respectful and polite and doesn't start asking freaky questions like if I've ever tag teamed the local football team. And before you ask, yes some bright spark did ask me this once. This is where my love affair with the delete button first started.
I can be quite vague about my family and exact details of where I live. I have shared some general details with people but there are only 3 people that know the name of my husband and children. For me that is the ultimate trust.


1Zratedgal
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:36:44 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/1/2011
Posts: 606
Location: Northern California, United States
Several friends know me before I came to Lush.
It was the easy thing to come over and make new friends here as I already had a few that we've had relationships with for some time.
There have been several people we've met here that we actually knew from other places and groups so it has been good for all.
Time will tell if we can meet up with several others I'd like to spend some quality time with!

Kisses!

Steph
Lisa
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:58:05 PM

Rank: Moderator

Joined: 3/3/2009
Posts: 5,186
Location: Victoria, Australia
Two people here know where I live and several other details about me. Lisa is my real first name but I don't use my real surname online. I once had a photo of my face posted in my image gallery but that lasted all of five minutes before I lost the nerve and deleted it! There are several people here I'd trust with more info about me, I just haven't shared much of it up until this point.
FelineFantasy
Posted: Tuesday, May 01, 2012 11:59:27 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/14/2011
Posts: 387
The people I interact with most on this site only know that my name is Stephanie, my occupation, and where area I live in.

Even though I am a DJ, I don't feel comfortable releasing my stage name as that is my real name.
I could always use the promotion, but I don't want to risk having a stalker or any weirdos at my shows.
I would never give out my facebook or any other social networks I use to anyone. You can't be too careful anymore!

Click > here < to read my first feature story, Techno Aphrodite by Piquet!
SydneySider
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 1:14:39 AM

Rank: Chat Moderator

Joined: 11/6/2011
Posts: 1,663
Location: Sydney, Australia
Most of my good friends in chat know my first name. Most on my friends list know more personal details about me(a handful or so). One I tell everything to...and she can get hold me any time of the day or night if she needs to.



overmykneenow
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 1:28:57 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/8/2010
Posts: 1,017
Location: United Kingdom
Revealing who you are on here is a very big deal to some people and yet people let personal information slip all the time - information which could be used to build up your identity

I wrote a piece for a former Lush member's magazine about the importance of keeping an identity secret and how easy it is to build someone's identity from a few snippets of information - article

facebook, twellow, tineye, 192.com - experienced identity hunters can use all these together to build up who you are and find out about your real life

About a year ago I got in to a bet with a user here, let's call her C, that I could find out who she was before she could find out who I was. All I knew was that she was on Twitter, the city she lived in and her interests - I found her full name within a few minutes. She found me about a day later, which was fine as I trusted her with the information. Unfortunately she accidently liked something i'd written under my real name leading to another lush user finding out who I was. Luckily the person who discovered it was a close friend on here but I was furious that the information leaked out and it dissolved any trust I had with C.

There's no need for people to know who you really are, it's simply a power-trip, something they can hold over you - getting off on the reaction they give when they send you a screen shot of your front door from streetview.

Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.

Why not read some stories instead

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freakycactus
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 4:15:21 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/12/2010
Posts: 409
Location: On my cloud, United Kingdom
A few people know my full name, four found out before I set up a Lush only email address and of those four I'm still in touch with two. Of the other two, I no longer speak to one because we just stopped talking over time, and the other one... that's a long story. It didn't end well and it took months before they finally left me alone.

Since I switched to an email address without my surname and that uses a different username, rather than another one I use for everything, I have revealed my identity to some other friends, I even have one added on Facebook. I prefer that they know who I am because I chose to tell them, rather than because I sent them an email or showed them something I've put on Twitter. I have to be able to trust the people who know my name because by knowing it they can easily find me and I'd prefer to not have some guy from Lush randomly show up on my doorstep.

I also know the full name of a number of people I talk to on Lush. It's never been a big thing when names have been exchanged, it's usually their surname showing up on an email they've sent me, which means they need to be more careful.

As for who I've revealed my true identity to, I'm not too sure what that means, but there are a couple who I've shared a lot with, the same as I would with a non-Lush friend, and they've been lovely and kind and supportive. That's more important than whether they know my name or not.

swollen
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 4:16:07 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/27/2010
Posts: 1,001
I have one friend on here who knows more about me than I do ! In fact, if I could get away with it, I'd have him babysit my kids - I guess that's what you call trust !! Hhmmmm, I wonder if he would ..................
laughing6
harbour
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 6:10:01 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 11/6/2010
Posts: 38
Only one and it was the biggest mistake of my life. But hindsight is 20/20 and thanks to that awful encounter I've since raised my standards considerably. bunny

"Nothing is villainous if it causes an erection"
-Marquis de Sade
Wolfie22
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 6:27:42 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/1/2010
Posts: 112
Location: United States
so far none, and as it stands I'd like to keep it that way for now. However, if someone is willing to talk for a while and become friends, that will change. But only then.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 7:09:59 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 531,824
So far none
sexyeyes37
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:23:12 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/13/2012
Posts: 601
Location: United Kingdom
Two know my real name.Haven't been on here that long,but about three know a lot about me and I trust them and we get on really well.

sexyeyes37
DLizze
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:43:18 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,552
There is one person on Lush who knows all. There are several who know my surname, and all of the story moderaters know my given name.

"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
Dreamwriter1
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:57:22 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 3/6/2012
Posts: 20
Location: On the beach
There is one on Lush who I am very close with and we know quite a bit about each other. There are a few select others who I have either emailed or chatted with and I do enjoy communicating with them. As far as my identity My first name is in my profile but other than that I don't share much except with a select few that are special.
crazydiamond
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 8:58:28 AM

Rank: Clever Gem

Joined: 7/17/2011
Posts: 2,286
Location: Exactly where I should be!, Canada
A few very close friends know a lot about me, but only one knows all, such as my identity, surname and location, actual email etc.
In fact he's the only person in the world who has a poster I designed! The only other full size print in existence.
(he,he might be worth something soon! Hang on to it you!)

I trust him completely and know just as much about him as he knows about me.
I have no problem with him knowing, he'd never abuse it, and neither would I.
In general though, I would not knowingly give that information out.

Guest
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 9:11:54 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 531,824
Never have, never will
latinfoxy
Posted: Wednesday, May 02, 2012 9:36:29 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/5/2011
Posts: 816
Location: Here
Most people on my friend list know my nickname that really is how my real life friends and family call me, but only 3 people know my real name and my real email adress and also are the only 3 people that know how i look like.
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