Welcome Guest Search | Active Topics | Members | Log In | Register

When having sex with your long term partner Options · View
Hayley79
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 11:08:24 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 7/14/2011
Posts: 61
Location: My pants, United Kingdom
A question mainly aimed at those in long term relationships. When having sex with your partner do you ever imagine it's someone else? I often do and it helps. I have fantasised about other men, including people I have had sex with, and it helps
me get off. It is especially likely to happen when he does me from
behind or goes down on me. Anyone else? He has sometimes encouraged it but is mainly blissfully unaware...of course he may do the same and I don't mind, though I would
probably rather not know.
Bermuda4t
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 11:26:23 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 8/1/2012
Posts: 37
Location: Portland, United States
when I'm with my wife I'm usually pretty focused on her.Liar
Sexyvonne
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:14:24 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 1/1/2012
Posts: 32
Location: United Kingdom
Sometimes we fantasise about other people, mainly women, but usually that is a joint fantasy and often it is either in the abstract or someone famous rather than people we know. I have fantasised about other people privately of course, and sometimes when in bed with a man, but it is not something I do a lot if at all when shagging my current bf. But rest assured it is normal, I am sure
lots do it x
1ball
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:18:02 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/13/2011
Posts: 970
Location: United States
We've been married over 25 years. In all that time, I've had a lot of women via fantasy who weren't my wife. I've even fantasized about green women from Star Trek episodes. :)

My latest story is too hot to publish. My most recent story before that is Even Stranger In Lust
1ball
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:22:36 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/13/2011
Posts: 970
Location: United States
I should also add that my wife admits to fantasizing about other men and that doesn't bother me a bit. Mainly certain actors, but also scenes from porn vids.

My latest story is too hot to publish. My most recent story before that is Even Stranger In Lust
Sexyvonne
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:24:48 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 1/1/2012
Posts: 32
Location: United Kingdom
I suppose there is a part of all of us that is just sexually private. You might tell your partner you fantasise about other people, you probably wouldn't say "Your mate John"!
Dancing_Doll
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:59:00 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde

Joined: 2/17/2010
Posts: 6,272
Location: West Coast
I have... long term, short term - doesn't matter... sometimes you're horny for a specific person and they invade your thoughts when you're turned on. I say let them into your head, and don't tell the one you're with.

It's not healthy for a relationship if it becomes a chronic habit, though. It also prevents 'intensely connected' sex, which I happen to love. So, I think once in a while it's fine but if I had to constantly rely on fantasies about someone else to get off, then I'd exit the current relationship.


Hayley79
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 1:15:21 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 7/14/2011
Posts: 61
Location: My pants, United Kingdom
Dancing_Doll wrote:
I have... long term, short term - doesn't matter... sometimes you're horny for a specific person and they invade your thoughts when you're turned on. I say let them into your head, and don't tell the one you're with.

It's not healthy for a relationship if it becomes a chronic habit, though. It also prevents 'intensely connected' sex, which I happen to love. So, I think once in a while it's fine but if I had to constantly rely on fantasies about someone else to get off, then I'd exit the current relationship.


Yes good point. It's not every time by any means. Just sometimes I need that little
something extra to push me over the edge!
Californiaman
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 1:46:10 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 4/7/2012
Posts: 23
Location: San Francisco , United States
Yes, of course. I would be surprised if anyone could say that they never have fantsized of someone else than their current lover. Perhaps it is just because it is so intrinsic to my sex life that it is hard to fathom that it is not a part of someone elses.

I suspect that this is particularly true of Lushies. We love the fantasy world; it is why we are here. If I could not imagine Personal Assistant, or Dancing Doll, or Sexyvixen (or perhaps you), life would be so boring!

1nympholes
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 2:29:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/31/2012
Posts: 730
Location: Bare Beach USA, United States
Oh Goodness yes, when I was married almost all a the time. Especially someone that was completely Taboo.

Now that I am free to be who I am and with who I want not so much. However I am sure there will be times.






The girl who started early at this game of sexual pleasure, This girl that never seems to get as much as she wants, at least from the right people. But now certainly the woman that will test all the paths of pleasure with you.
TheDevilsWeakness
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 2:50:48 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/19/2011
Posts: 1,300
Location: I'm the girl that your father hoped he could date.
Californiaman wrote:
Yes, of course. I would be surprised if anyone could say that they never have fantsized of someone else than their current lover. Perhaps it is just because it is so intrinsic to my sex life that it is hard to fathom that it is not a part of someone elses.

I suspect that this is particularly true of Lushies. We love the fantasy world; it is why we are here. If I could not imagine Personal Assistant, or Dancing Doll, or Sexyvixen (or perhaps you), life would be so boring!


*Raises hand*

I would be one of those ones that has never fantasized about someone else while having sex with my partner. I tend to be entirely focused on him. It's just something I've never done.

But masturbating... that's a whole 'nother story! Jason Statham *SIGH* evil4

Aussie07
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 3:17:28 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/14/2012
Posts: 381
Location: Australia
I have tried i once but i much perfer to look and watch at the job im doing watch her face and body making sure im doing the job right for her, after all sex is boring if dont do it right and both have good times rather than just you getting off
CenterLine
Posted: Friday, August 03, 2012 3:24:02 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/19/2012
Posts: 541
Location: Cuddling with friends,, United States
My mind wanders a lot (and I imagine hers does some as well), from me and her, to me and somebody else, even to her and me as somebody else; but it always cycles back to the two of us together several times through the encounter, and almost always ends on it. For context, I'm Pan and non-op MTF trans.
Janey79
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 10:15:30 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 12/28/2011
Posts: 64
Location: United Kingdom
I don't think I could do it looking at him face to face but have definitely imagined it being another woman when he goes down on me......I don't think it does any harm after all we all have our fantasies and I'm sure as hell he does!
Coco
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 10:30:55 AM

Rank: Story Lover

Joined: 7/22/2011
Posts: 4,446
Location: Fantasy City, United States
While masturbating I fantasize about others, I definitely need to at that time. But, when I'm with him I don't, I find myself focused completely on my partner so that I can feel him emotionally as well as physically. Now if this question was asked in relation to swinging, I'd have a different answer.

blazestcyr
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 10:41:57 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/19/2011
Posts: 737
Location: where bugs die
during the actual act....never..i love to have sex with the person i adore..they never get old to me
Nikki703
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 1:13:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 12,671
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
I have on occaision. I have even told my current partner afterwards a couple of times of my fantasies. But you can only do that if your relationship is strong enough to accept that.
Guest
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 1:23:58 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 535,080
1nympholes wrote:
Oh Goodness yes, when I was married almost all a the time. Especially someone that was completely Taboo.

Now that I am free to be who I am and with who I want not so much. However I am sure there will be times.


I know the feeling. It drives me wild thinking about others when doing it with my wife. I just wont be screaming out the person's name Im thinking about with her. That is a secret best left to my mind. angel7
Budlee
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 4:09:45 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/24/2012
Posts: 1,295
Location: Central NJ, United States
No, not at all. Totally in the moment with each other.
MoonlightSerenity
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 5:04:45 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/7/2012
Posts: 854
Location: United Kingdom
Nope, why would I? I'm very happy with who I'm with and so don't want other men ^^

Teased and Tormented -My very first story and competition entry is now up!
CleverFox
Posted: Thursday, August 09, 2012 5:30:45 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/25/2012
Posts: 481
Location: United States
1ball wrote:
We've been married over 25 years. In all that time, I've had a lot of women via fantasy who weren't my wife. I've even fantasized about green women from Star Trek episodes. :)


The green woman from Star Trek? Now that is just perverted.
Naughtygrl73
Posted: Sunday, August 12, 2012 2:55:45 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 5/21/2011
Posts: 1,418
Location: The Naughty Mansion, Australia
Never when I'm with my man, unless we are talking about our fantasies as part of our loving.
That totally changes when it comes to masturbating, then there are one or two who flit through my mind

Users browsing this topic
Guest 


Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum.
You cannot reply to topics in this forum.
You cannot delete your posts in this forum.
You cannot edit your posts in this forum.
You cannot create polls in this forum.
You cannot vote in polls in this forum.

Main Forum RSS : RSS

Powered by Yet Another Forum.net version 1.9.1.6 (NET v4.0) - 11/14/2007
Copyright © 2003-2006 Yet Another Forum.net. All rights reserved.