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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/14/2012
Posts: 522
Location: somewhere boring, United States
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You know you're a parent when.... you're not evening watching, and you can sing/speak along to pretty much any pixar or childrens movie.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 8/12/2010
Posts: 396
Location: United States
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- I knew I was a parent when my "shower repertoire" included the Spice Girls, sorry Don Henley and Stevie Nicks. And the kids loved it. Now when by mistake I found myself still whistling that tune the say "oh dad, yuk gross, what r you gay"
- You're a parent when you see your wife/partner and she replies " you want what again? You know what I did all day?
But # 1 you know you're a parent when the 7.0 liter convertible is still on that pic on the wall while in the driveway there's a 7 seater minivan.
Practice what you know, and it will help to make clear what now you do not know. — Rembrandt
There is poetry as soon as we realize that we possess nothing. — John Cage
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/26/2012
Posts: 251
Location: picking wildflowers over yonder , United States
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you know your a parent when every time you hear a kid say "MOM!" you instantly turn around whether your kid is with you or not. that and you know every word to "Blue's Clues".....LOL!
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 5/27/2010
Posts: 903
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You know you're a parent when you come home to a hallway full of smelly, size 10 DC's (him!) and your favourite mascara keeps disappearing (her!) Of course, the fridge and kitchen cupboards are always empty and so is my bank account !! However, I wouldn't change a thing. 
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/1/2012
Posts: 154
Location: United Kingdom
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They hold your hand for no other reason than they simply want to.
You're the truth, not I...
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 10,555
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
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So many times you know but you really, really know you are a parent when your daughter is out on her first date and its late and the phone rings and you get "that feeling"!!
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/4/2010
Posts: 5,579
Location: Alabama, United States
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orangefox444 wrote:They hold your hand for no other reason than they simply want to. Ain't that the truth! My little girl loves to hold my hand whenever we're walking somewhere. And I love it even more than she does. You know you're a parent when you have to sleep with some form of clothing on because you know your kid will end up in your bed before the night is through.
When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/15/2011
Posts: 327
Location: In your Fantasy
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You know you are a Parent when your happiness doesn't matter anymore, only your child's happiness matters.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 6/8/2010
Posts: 712
Location: United Kingdom
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... the paternity test comes back
Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist. Why not read some stories instead
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Rank: Story Verifier
Joined: 5/27/2012
Posts: 932
Location: United Kingdom
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overmykneenow wrote:... the paternity test comes back I told you, you need to be working instead of watching repeats of Jeremy Kyle! 
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Rank: Active Ink Slinger
Joined: 5/14/2012
Posts: 13
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you know you are a parent when your handbag is full of varying sizes of sanitary towels and tampons, and antibacterial handwash replaces your perfume
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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006
Posts: 326,942
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 You know your a parent when you find your 3 year old daughters socks in your purse because she likes to play with your stuff.
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 5/26/2012
Posts: 54
Location: Hooterville, United States
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I knew I was a parent the first time she kicked!
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 7/19/2011
Posts: 949
Location: I'm the girl that your father hoped he could date.
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 I knew I was a parent when I could no longer go to the bathroom alone. I thought 4hrs of sleep was a lot. I can function on 2hrs easily, just don't ask me direct questions. And midnight runs to the drugstore for diapers and/or medication for a fever. Now, I've hit a whole new level parenting... My teenage daughter is starting to date. (I need to buy shotgun shells)
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/14/2012
Posts: 522
Location: somewhere boring, United States
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swollen wrote:You know you're a parent when you come home to a hallway full of smelly, size 10 DC's (him!) and your favourite mascara keeps disappearing (her!) Of course, the fridge and kitchen cupboards are always empty and so is my bank account !! However, I wouldn't change a thing. Lol my daughter eats like a machine. And never seems to lose energy. Also more destructive than both of my nephews ever were together
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/14/2012
Posts: 522
Location: somewhere boring, United States
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TheDevilsWeakness wrote: I knew I was a parent when I could no longer go to the bathroom alone. I thought 4hrs of sleep was a lot. I can function on 2hrs easily, just don't ask me direct questions. And midnight runs to the drugstore for diapers and/or medication for a fever. Now, I've hit a whole new level parenting... My teenage daughter is starting to date. (I need to buy shotgun shells) Ok i used to like the gun idea but think about this. I have an almost 6 foot sword, difference? swords are silent, plus for my size im told are quite intimidating. luckily shes only 3 so they have awhile yet lol
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/26/2012
Posts: 251
Location: picking wildflowers over yonder , United States
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Princess4Jim wrote:You know you are a Parent when your happiness doesn't matter anymore, only your child's happiness matters. That is very true.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 7/19/2011
Posts: 949
Location: I'm the girl that your father hoped he could date.
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musicluver wrote:
Ok i used to like the gun idea but think about this. I have an almost 6 foot sword, difference? swords are silent, plus for my size im told are quite intimidating. luckily shes only 3 so they have awhile yet lol
Nope... I want the shells. I can switch out the buckshot for rock salt. And if I have to pull the trigger it's going to burn like a mf'er. I want to scare the hell out of them, not kill them...yet.  PS I swear I blinked... It seems like mine was only 3, yesterday. Sigh
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Rank: Detention Seeker
Joined: 8/17/2010
Posts: 722
Location: Over your Knee Screaming and Kicking!, United King
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you know you're a parent when you have no time to yourself after cooking cleaning and picking up toys, and your t.v consists of children's television only and early night's.
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 8/27/2012
Posts: 88
Location: StrangeLand, New Zealand
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You know your a parent when...
One; your son throws your Ipad into the bath because you forgot to put it out of reach. Fuck!!! ;D
Two; he tries to sit on it to hide it away because he knows he done something wrong.
And three; you can't yell or growl or be angry at him because hes too freakin' cute; his smile has the power to shatter your world, cascade light and bring you to your knees.
Worst of all!! He knows this!!
Damn, I've got it baddd.
Evil Brain Angel Heart - E.B.A.H
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/14/2012
Posts: 522
Location: somewhere boring, United States
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All i can say is i hate spongebob and dora 
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/26/2012
Posts: 251
Location: picking wildflowers over yonder , United States
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musicluver wrote:All i can say is i hate spongebob and dora yep!
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Rank: Advanced Wordsmith
Joined: 10/4/2012
Posts: 87
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When you don't know if its poop or chocolate till ya smell it.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/5/2012
Posts: 3,528
Location: Where Dreams Come True, United States
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You know you're a partner when you catch yourself watching the Disney channel or Nick and your kids aren't even home!
Want To Read My Lush Competition Piece? Click Below To Find Out <3
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 3/28/2012
Posts: 4,995
Location: Around, South Africa
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When Barney has a restraining order against you.
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/5/2012
Posts: 3,528
Location: Where Dreams Come True, United States
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When you get more excited to see the lastest Disney movie coming out..
Or you get excited when you see a Disney movie come out of the volt for a short limited time.
Want To Read My Lush Competition Piece? Click Below To Find Out <3
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/15/2011
Posts: 327
Location: In your Fantasy
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You know you are a parent, when no one matter how much time has passed since your child died, the smallest thing reminds you of them...
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/5/2012
Posts: 3,528
Location: Where Dreams Come True, United States
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Princess4Jim wrote:You know you are a parent, when no one matter how much time has passed since your child died, the smallest thing reminds you of them... This made me stop and send a pray out to any who have.
Want To Read My Lush Competition Piece? Click Below To Find Out <3
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Rank: Story Verifier
Joined: 5/21/2011
Posts: 723
Location: The Naughty Mansion, Australia
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I knew I was a mum when my little one handed me a half chewed, soggy biscuit and I didnt think twice about finishing it Ahhh the joys of motherhood
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Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 11/12/2009
Posts: 334
Location: Adelaide, Australia
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You know you're a parent when you make yourself a lovely, strong, aromatic pot of espresso, then you get out your 1921 Wedgwood Patrician Ware cup and saucer; the one with the hand painted gold edging, then you pour into it the last few inches of leftover milk from the baby bottle your two year old has just discarded.
 http://www.lushstories.com/stories/quickie-sex/claudia-incarnatapart-vii.aspx
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