|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 4/3/2010 Posts: 3,340 Location: California
|
Quote:Editor's note: Ian Kerner, a sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author, blogs about sex for CNN Health. Read more from him on his website, GoodInBed.
(CNN) -- If you're thinking that the benefits of a hefty bank account could help turn up the heat in the bedroom, you're at least partly right. Money might not buy love, but it can allow for a sizzling sex life.
About 70% of multimillionaires -- with a mean net worth of a whopping $90 million -- say they enjoy better and more adventurous sex, according to a 2007 survey by Prince & Associates Inc., a marketing research firm specializing in global private wealth.
"Fully 63% of rich men said wealth gave them 'better sex,' which they defined as having more-frequent sex with more partners. That compares to 88% of women who said more money gave them better sex, which they defined as 'higher quality' sex," writes Robert Frank in an article for the Wealth Report entitled "The Rich Libido." It makes sense when you think about it: Money relieves much of the life stresses that most of us have to deal with, helping those 1%ers relax and let go.
The security of extreme wealth can provide a sense of stability that many people, particularly female millionaires, find empowering. And expensive toys like private jets and trips to exotic locales certainly don't hurt, either.
Ian Kerner Hooking up with the rich may even improve the quality of sex, at least for women. In a 2009 study (PDF), researchers at Newcastle University found that as male partners' income increased, so did the frequency of women's orgasms.
Could money act as an aphrodisiac? Maybe. Or, as the study's authors suggest, perhaps wealth-inspired orgasms are the result of evolution, helping women discriminate between men to find those that have the best provider potential.
However, a partner who can provide more resources and more orgasms may not necessarily be the best long-term bet, because wealth changes people, and not always for the better.
According to social psychologist Justin Lehmiller, "Wealthier people engage in more dishonest and unethical behavior, and these traits may follow them into the bedroom. In fact, research has found that power and wealth are linked to a higher likelihood of infidelity."
But luckily for all of 99%ers, sex itself may confer more happiness than money ever could. In one study, researchers at Dartmouth College and the University of Warwick, England, measured levels of happiness in 16,000 men and women. They found that the more sex people had, the happier they were, regardless of their age or whether they were male or female. And while money was found to buy more sexual partners, it didn't necessarily buy more sex. In fact, men who paid for sex were considerably less happy than those who didn't, which makes sense.
According to Lehmiller, "You can buy all of the sex you want, but at the end of the day, most of us want and need more than a few moments of physical contact. Purchasing sex does not meet our psychological needs for intimacy and emotional connection."
The researchers even found that sex is so closely tied to happiness that they estimated increasing sexual intercourse from once a month to once a week would have the same mood-boosting effects as adding $50,000 a year in income.
Sex may contribute to your happiness -- and your actual bank account -- in other ways, too. According to research by biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher, people who have more sex might do better at work.
Sex triggers the release of various brain chemicals, such as dopamine, vasopressin and oxytocin, which are associated with creativity, problem-solving, cooperation and confidence. It stands to reason, says Fisher, that regular sex might improve performance in the boardroom as well as the bedroom.
So how can you reap these rewards? Invest in your relationship by giving it the same time and attention that you would your retirement portfolio. Make time for date nights. Make sure that the number of positive interactions with your partner outnumbers the negatives.
Practice 30-second hugs to get those feel-good chemicals flowing. Share a cuddle -- and maybe a fantasy or two. Remember, you may not own six homes and a private jet, but when you bank on your relationship, you can feel just as rich. So what makes you happier: sex or money? There's this saying I like that goes, women need security and men need approval. But is it really more like men need and approval and so do women? Approval meaning sex and fucking and cumming with the one you desire most of all. Or is security just as important to our happiness? Or do we need both all the time to be truly happy? I tend to think we need a certain degree of both but this is about which one is more important in your opinion. A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose?

|
|
  Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 3/24/2010 Posts: 1,914 Location: Europe
|
Impressive studies. I am not romantic at all, but I am saying sex can make you happier than money. With money is this thing, no matter how much you have it, you always crave for more, so that is not really definition for happiness.. I understand that money can give you confidence and security that person needs, money for dam sure makes life easier but good sex is fulfilling and moments when you crave for some more are just delightful which is not the case with the money. When I crave for more material stuff, my stomach hurts, my nerves are on fire I am frustrated and annoyed, so that doesn't make me happy. Magical_felix wrote:There's this saying I like that goes, women need security and men need approval.
But is it really more like men need and approval and so do women? Approval meaning sex and fucking and cumming with the one you desire most of all.
Or is security just as important to our happiness?
Or do we need both all the time to be truly happy? I tend to think we need a certain degree of both but this is about which one is more important in your opinion.
A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose? We all need security and approval question is how much of it every individual is willing to sacrifice for it. Security relaxes us, makes us stabilized and yes, I would say that it is part of personal happiness. Of I could choose, I would go with living from month to month in poor life with dynamic sex in it.
|
|
  Rank: The Linebacker
Joined: 3/2/2011 Posts: 3,445 Location: Atlanta, United States
|
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 4/3/2010 Posts: 3,340 Location: California
|
She wrote:Impressive studies.
I am not romantic at all, but I am saying sex can make you happier than money. With money is this thing, no matter how much you have it, you always crave for more, so that is not really definition for happiness.. I understand that money can give you confidence and security that person needs, money for dam sure makes life easier but good sex is fulfilling and moments when you crave for some more are just delightful which is not the case with the money. When I crave for more material stuff, my stomach hurts, my nerves are on fire I am frustrated and annoyed, so that doesn't make me happy.
That is not necessarily true. I live way below my means. I dont crave for more material things. In fact, I think I buy less crap now that I am better off. It's almost like I was filling a void before. That or maybe I was a dumb kid that liked to spend too much money. But now I hardly spend money on things that aren't necessary or to the point of excess. I crave more and more sex when I have a partner I am really attracted too actually. Maybe the craving has more to do with personality on an individual basis than with money or sex and happiness.

|
|
  Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 3/24/2010 Posts: 1,914 Location: Europe
|
Magical_felix wrote:
That is not necessarily true. I live way below my means. I dont crave for more material things. In fact, I think I buy less crap now that I am better off. It's almost like I was filling a void before. That or maybe I was a dumb kid that liked to spend too much money. But now I hardly spend money on things that aren't necessary or to the point of excess. I crave more and more sex when I have a partner I am really attracted too actually. Maybe the craving has more to do with personality on an individual basis than with money or sex and happiness.
:) I am pleased you responded like this. I agree with you completely, but I don't think that there are many of us who have chosen to live 'simple' life. What I was trying to say that most people that I know, live as I described and I personally see that as rat race. I think craving is part of our DNA and I don't think is individual thing, but I do believe that is matter of personal choice to change what we will crave for or not. You, obviously found your way and I assume you are happy? So sex is making you happier than money, right?
|
|
  Rank: Story Verifier
Joined: 10/21/2010 Posts: 1,214 Location: United States
|
Somehow, I can't imagine being a sexless billionaire.
I am a whore. Find something else to fight about. - Nell Gwyn (to her coachman, who was fighting a man for calling her a whore)
|
|
  Rank: Thread Mediator
Joined: 9/25/2009 Posts: 4,114 Location: United States
|
If I can only have one, I'll take sex. Because if the sex is truly a source of happiness, then that means I'm in love with my partner. And as I've found out: if I have love, I can do without many things. Conversely, of course one can find sex, especially armed with considerable wealth, but sex alone- same as money alone- only gets me so far in terms of happiness.
|
|
Rank: Active Ink Slinger
Joined: 5/21/2012 Posts: 22 Location: United States
|
Neither..its true love..its commitment..its trusting your partner..sex is not the be all and end all..and money just causes more trouble.
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 1/16/2010 Posts: 259 Location: Longview, United States
|
submary69 wrote:Neither..its true love..its commitment..its trusting your partner..sex is not the be all and end all..and money just causes more trouble. I fully endorse. Sex comes along with love. Yep it would be love making and not sex.
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 10/4/2010 Posts: 5,628 Location: Alabama, United States
|
Call me jaded, but I'll take the cash. When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 9/13/2011 Posts: 938 Location: United States
|
If I didn't already have a soulmate, I would take the cash but live simply. Money buys options, not happiness. Since I have a soulmate, having the time to devote to her while getting enough intensely focused undistracted time is how I find the most happiness. If I could do that while scrounging a living, I could find happiness while being poor.
My latest story is for cheaters, Marriage Rehab.
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 5/31/2012 Posts: 212 Location: Chi-town area, United States
|
Sex or money alone cannot bring you happiness. Sex without meaning or with someone special is unfulfilling. Likewise money alone cannot buy you happiness. if you think otherwise then you are delusional.
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 8/13/2012 Posts: 205 Location: Ibagué, Colombia
|
I'd say money buys happiness. It might sound crude but it's true. Happiness from sex is momentary.
|
|
Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006 Posts: 332,008
|
I've never had enough sex or money. I have had a purely sexual relationship that left me wanting for love. All things considered I'll take love over sex and money.
|
|
Rank: Lurker
Joined: 11/30/2006 Posts: 332,008
|
For me money is more important than sex. Financial freedom is important for me as a person and as a woman. I wouldn't want to depend on a man to feed me or tell me what to do with my life. It's a must. When I loose a partner and I depend on him entirely, it wouldn't do much good on me as a person..right?
|
|
Rank: Active Ink Slinger
Joined: 4/26/2013 Posts: 15 Location: United States
|
I'll just have sex for money!! Well maybe 20 years ago!!
|
|
  Rank: The Linebacker
Joined: 3/2/2011 Posts: 3,445 Location: Atlanta, United States
|
In reality having lots of money will get you plenty of sex, but true love it won't.
Please check out my newest story: "The Legend of Dick Touché"http://www.lushstories.com/stories/group-sex/the-legend-of-dick-touch%C3%A9.aspxOr my previous story: http://www.lushstories.com/stories/milf/10-items-or-less.aspx
|
|
  Rank: Brawling Berserker
Joined: 2/12/2012 Posts: 1,404 Location: Not on your radar, Norway
|
If I'm not mistaken then money and finances causes more arguments in relationships than the lack of sex. Not to mention that it brings stress and anxiety. I think the question is quite individual. After all, sex doesn't necessarily mean love. A sex with a prostitute is still sex, but is it really all that? And what if you have kids? Is sex more important than money then? Is the sexual satisfaction you get more important than making sure that your kids are fed and clothed as well as securing a future for them? It's one of these simple questions that have a complicated answer that's unique for every individual. Lush has added a new feature! This link allows you to see who has viewed your profile lately and who might be interested in you. Please click it and give feedback for improving the site :)
|
|
  Rank: Alpha Blonde
Joined: 2/17/2010 Posts: 4,456 Location: In your dirty fantasies
|
Magical_felix wrote:
A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose?
Hmmm... as hard to imagine as it is, fucking a homeless bum could lose its thrill after a while. Cash me out, please.
The complete 50,000+ word novel, inspired by the original short story, is now available for instant download on Amazon.com *Forum Announcement and More Dirty Details* *** Click here to read my NEW Hardcore rough sex story. Now a Lush Editor's Pick selection! ***
|
|
  Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 3/24/2010 Posts: 1,914 Location: Europe
|
I've changed my mind, my Lelo toys are doing splendid job so.. Dancing_Doll wrote:Hmmm... as hard to imagine as it is, fucking a homeless bum could lose its thrill after a while. Cash me out, please.
|
|
Rank: Rookie Scribe
Joined: 6/11/2013 Posts: 1 Location: izlooo, Austria
|
But for a long term relation..both are important..u cant left her hungry both ways if u do care for her..
|
|
Rank: Forum Guru
Joined: 3/31/2013 Posts: 163 Location: United Kingdom
|
Probably Money.
But I think neither of those brings real happiness.
Friends and family are what bring true contentment in life.
|
|
|
Guest |