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What is a more important factor for happiness: Sex or Money? Options · View
Magical_felix
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 9:44:53 AM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 4,913
Location: California
Quote:
Editor's note: Ian Kerner, a sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author, blogs about sex for CNN Health. Read more from him on his website, GoodInBed.

(CNN) -- If you're thinking that the benefits of a hefty bank account could help turn up the heat in the bedroom, you're at least partly right.
Money might not buy love, but it can allow for a sizzling sex life.

About 70% of multimillionaires -- with a mean net worth of a whopping $90 million -- say they enjoy better and more adventurous sex, according to a 2007 survey by Prince & Associates Inc., a marketing research firm specializing in global private wealth.

"Fully 63% of rich men said wealth gave them 'better sex,' which they defined as having more-frequent sex with more partners. That compares to 88% of women who said more money gave them better sex, which they defined as 'higher quality' sex," writes Robert Frank in an article for the Wealth Report entitled "The Rich Libido."
It makes sense when you think about it: Money relieves much of the life stresses that most of us have to deal with, helping those 1%ers relax and let go.

The security of extreme wealth can provide a sense of stability that many people, particularly female millionaires, find empowering. And expensive toys like private jets and trips to exotic locales certainly don't hurt, either.

Ian Kerner
Hooking up with the rich may even improve the quality of sex, at least for women. In a 2009 study (PDF), researchers at Newcastle University found that as male partners' income increased, so did the frequency of women's orgasms.

Could money act as an aphrodisiac? Maybe. Or, as the study's authors suggest, perhaps wealth-inspired orgasms are the result of evolution, helping women discriminate between men to find those that have the best provider potential.

However, a partner who can provide more resources and more orgasms may not necessarily be the best long-term bet, because wealth changes people, and not always for the better.

According to social psychologist Justin Lehmiller, "Wealthier people engage in more dishonest and unethical behavior, and these traits may follow them into the bedroom. In fact, research has found that power and wealth are linked to a higher likelihood of infidelity."

But luckily for all of 99%ers, sex itself may confer more happiness than money ever could. In one study, researchers at Dartmouth College and the University of Warwick, England, measured levels of happiness in 16,000 men and women. They found that the more sex people had, the happier they were, regardless of their age or whether they were male or female. And while money was found to buy more sexual partners, it didn't necessarily buy more sex. In fact, men who paid for sex were considerably less happy than those who didn't, which makes sense.

According to Lehmiller, "You can buy all of the sex you want, but at the end of the day, most of us want and need more than a few moments of physical contact. Purchasing sex does not meet our psychological needs for intimacy and emotional connection."

The researchers even found that sex is so closely tied to happiness that they estimated increasing sexual intercourse from once a month to once a week would have the same mood-boosting effects as adding $50,000 a year in income.

Sex may contribute to your happiness -- and your actual bank account -- in other ways, too. According to research by biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher, people who have more sex might do better at work.

Sex triggers the release of various brain chemicals, such as dopamine, vasopressin and oxytocin, which are associated with creativity, problem-solving, cooperation and confidence. It stands to reason, says Fisher, that regular sex might improve performance in the boardroom as well as the bedroom.

So how can you reap these rewards? Invest in your relationship by giving it the same time and attention that you would your retirement portfolio. Make time for date nights. Make sure that the number of positive interactions with your partner outnumbers the negatives.

Practice 30-second hugs to get those feel-good chemicals flowing. Share a cuddle -- and maybe a fantasy or two. Remember, you may not own six homes and a private jet, but when you bank on your relationship, you can feel just as rich.
So what makes you happier: sex or money?


There's this saying I like that goes, women need security and men need approval.

But is it really more like men need and approval and so do women? Approval meaning sex and fucking and cumming with the one you desire most of all.

Or is security just as important to our happiness?

Or do we need both all the time to be truly happy? I tend to think we need a certain degree of both but this is about which one is more important in your opinion.

A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose?



She
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 10:40:57 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/24/2010
Posts: 2,160
Location: Europe
Impressive studies.

I am not romantic at all, but I am saying sex can make you happier than money.
With money is this thing, no matter how much you have it, you always crave for more, so that is not really definition for happiness.. I understand that money can give you confidence and security that person needs, money for dam sure makes life easier but good sex is fulfilling and moments when you crave for some more are just delightful which is not the case with the money. When I crave for more material stuff, my stomach hurts, my nerves are on fire I am frustrated and annoyed, so that doesn't make me happy.


Magical_felix wrote:
There's this saying I like that goes, women need security and men need approval.

But is it really more like men need and approval and so do women? Approval meaning sex and fucking and cumming with the one you desire most of all.

Or is security just as important to our happiness?

Or do we need both all the time to be truly happy? I tend to think we need a certain degree of both but this is about which one is more important in your opinion.

A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose?


We all need security and approval question is how much of it every individual is willing to sacrifice for it.
Security relaxes us, makes us stabilized and yes, I would say that it is part of personal happiness.
Of I could choose, I would go with living from month to month in poor life with dynamic sex in it.


Buz
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 10:48:53 AM

Rank: The Linebacker

Joined: 3/2/2011
Posts: 5,834
Location: Atlanta, United States
I am greedy. I want both!

Magical_felix
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 12:07:50 PM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 4,913
Location: California
She wrote:
Impressive studies.

I am not romantic at all, but I am saying sex can make you happier than money.
With money is this thing, no matter how much you have it, you always crave for more, so that is not really definition for happiness.. I understand that money can give you confidence and security that person needs, money for dam sure makes life easier but good sex is fulfilling and moments when you crave for some more are just delightful which is not the case with the money. When I crave for more material stuff, my stomach hurts, my nerves are on fire I am frustrated and annoyed, so that doesn't make me happy.




That is not necessarily true. I live way below my means. I dont crave for more material things. In fact, I think I buy less crap now that I am better off. It's almost like I was filling a void before. That or maybe I was a dumb kid that liked to spend too much money. But now I hardly spend money on things that aren't necessary or to the point of excess. I crave more and more sex when I have a partner I am really attracted too actually. Maybe the craving has more to do with personality on an individual basis than with money or sex and happiness.



She
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 12:26:43 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/24/2010
Posts: 2,160
Location: Europe
Magical_felix wrote:


That is not necessarily true. I live way below my means. I dont crave for more material things. In fact, I think I buy less crap now that I am better off. It's almost like I was filling a void before. That or maybe I was a dumb kid that liked to spend too much money. But now I hardly spend money on things that aren't necessary or to the point of excess. I crave more and more sex when I have a partner I am really attracted too actually. Maybe the craving has more to do with personality on an individual basis than with money or sex and happiness.


:) I am pleased you responded like this. I agree with you completely, but I don't think that there are many of us who have chosen to live 'simple' life. What I was trying to say that most people that I know, live as I described and I personally see that as rat race.
I think craving is part of our DNA and I don't think is individual thing, but I do believe that is matter of personal choice to change what we will crave for or not.
You, obviously found your way and I assume you are happy? So sex is making you happier than money, right?
Ruthie
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 12:27:27 PM

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Location: United States
Somehow, I can't imagine being a sexless billionaire.
LadyX
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 7:28:08 PM

Rank: Artistic Tart

Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,827
If I can only have one, I'll take sex. Because if the sex is truly a source of happiness, then that means I'm in love with my partner. And as I've found out: if I have love, I can do without many things. Conversely, of course one can find sex, especially armed with considerable wealth, but sex alone- same as money alone- only gets me so far in terms of happiness.
submary69
Posted: Sunday, October 07, 2012 7:50:13 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 5/22/2012
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Neither..its true love..its commitment..its trusting your partner..sex is not the be all and end all..and money just causes more trouble.
nazhinaz
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 4:28:34 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/16/2010
Posts: 293
Location: Longview, United States
submary69 wrote:
Neither..its true love..its commitment..its trusting your partner..sex is not the be all and end all..and money just causes more trouble.

I fully endorse.
Sex comes along with love.
Yep it would be love making and not sex.
lafayettemister
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 8:21:13 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/4/2010
Posts: 6,376
Location: Alabama, United States
Call me jaded, but I'll take the cash.





When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates
1ball
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 8:49:19 AM

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Joined: 9/13/2011
Posts: 970
Location: United States
If I didn't already have a soulmate, I would take the cash but live simply. Money buys options, not happiness. Since I have a soulmate, having the time to devote to her while getting enough intensely focused undistracted time is how I find the most happiness. If I could do that while scrounging a living, I could find happiness while being poor.

My latest story is too hot to publish. My most recent story before that is Even Stranger In Lust
Smoothtalkin_wolf
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 10:34:45 AM

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Joined: 5/31/2012
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Location: Chi-town area, United States
Sex or money alone cannot bring you happiness. Sex without meaning or with someone special is unfulfilling. Likewise money alone cannot buy you happiness. if you think otherwise then you are delusional.
ElChupacabras
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 12:35:05 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/13/2012
Posts: 205
Location: Ibagué, Colombia
I'd say money buys happiness. It might sound crude but it's true. Happiness from sex is momentary. sheepholy
Guest
Posted: Monday, October 08, 2012 1:25:18 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,818
I've never had enough sex or money. I have had a purely sexual relationship that left me wanting for love. All things considered I'll take love over sex and money.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, November 03, 2012 9:45:14 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,818
For me money is more important than sex. Financial freedom is important for me as a person and as a woman. I wouldn't want to depend on a man to feed me or tell me what to do with my life. It's a must. When I loose a partner and I depend on him entirely, it wouldn't do much good on me as a person..right?
Guest
Posted: Saturday, June 15, 2013 10:07:27 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,818
I'll just have sex for money!! Well maybe 20 years ago!!
Buz
Posted: Saturday, June 15, 2013 10:11:54 PM

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Joined: 3/2/2011
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Location: Atlanta, United States
In reality having lots of money will get you plenty of sex, but true love it won't.

elitfromnorth
Posted: Monday, June 17, 2013 12:55:53 PM

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Joined: 2/12/2012
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Location: Burrowed, Norway
If I'm not mistaken then money and finances causes more arguments in relationships than the lack of sex. Not to mention that it brings stress and anxiety.

I think the question is quite individual. After all, sex doesn't necessarily mean love. A sex with a prostitute is still sex, but is it really all that? And what if you have kids? Is sex more important than money then? Is the sexual satisfaction you get more important than making sure that your kids are fed and clothed as well as securing a future for them?

It's one of these simple questions that have a complicated answer that's unique for every individual.

"It's at that point you realise Lady Luck is actually a hooker, and you're fresh out of cash."
Dancing_Doll
Posted: Monday, June 17, 2013 1:16:03 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde

Joined: 2/17/2010
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Location: West Coast
Magical_felix wrote:



A sexless billionaire... or a homeless bum in love with another homeless bum who have loving sex all day? which would you chose?


Hmmm... as hard to imagine as it is, fucking a homeless bum could lose its thrill after a while. Cash me out, please. glasses8


She
Posted: Monday, June 17, 2013 1:45:53 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/24/2010
Posts: 2,160
Location: Europe
I've changed my mind, my Lelo toys are doing splendid job love7

so..

Dancing_Doll wrote:


Hmmm... as hard to imagine as it is, fucking a homeless bum could lose its thrill after a while. Cash me out, please. glasses8

glasses8
Guest
Posted: Monday, June 17, 2013 2:50:28 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,818
But for a long term relation..both are important..u cant left her hungry both ways if u do care for her..
paul_moadib
Posted: Tuesday, June 18, 2013 3:25:33 PM

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Joined: 3/31/2013
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Location: Docking bay 94
Probably Money.

But I think neither of those brings real happiness.

Friends and family are what bring true contentment in life.
Musigal
Posted: Wednesday, June 19, 2013 5:55:58 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/16/2013
Posts: 181
Location: Australia
I agree with most people. Sex over money!
Emerys
Posted: Wednesday, June 19, 2013 7:37:58 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/27/2013
Posts: 342
Location: United States
Money.

If someone offered to give me five billion dollars on the condition that I could never have sex again, I'd take it. As long as I can masturbate, I'm good. I mean, it would be a huge loss for sure, but I'd still go for the money.

I'd marry someone who was asexual (they'd have to sign a prenup, though) and we'd travel the world together. Maybe adopt a few kids.

I'll manage.

Guest
Posted: Friday, June 21, 2013 2:57:40 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,818
Nowadays, i think money trumps. No diseases, just a rotting character. And then, just buy a new face.
BelleduJour
Posted: Monday, July 01, 2013 6:31:35 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 1,509
Location: Canada
Smoothtalkin_wolf wrote:
Sex or money alone cannot bring you happiness. Sex without meaning or with someone special is unfulfilling. Likewise money alone cannot buy you happiness. if you think otherwise then you are delusional.


Bingo!

Niall123
Posted: Monday, July 01, 2013 7:11:13 PM

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Location: United Kingdom
I'd be a sexless billionaire in a second!!
jeremiahbull
Posted: Monday, July 01, 2013 11:58:15 PM

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Joined: 10/30/2011
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Location: United States
Sex with someone you love. If not with someone you love I would take the money and buy sex.
danny101
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 12:24:30 AM

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Location: Kankakee, United States
i believe in love as much as civilization believes in money.

my witty cum-back is on its way
danny101
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 12:24:32 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 7/10/2011
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Location: Kankakee, United States


my witty cum-back is on its way
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