For once in your life, think with the big brain and not the small brain. Focus completely on her happiness, comfort and making her feel confident. Remember, every girl you meet is somebody's sister, daughter, cousin, friend.... treat her as you would like one of your mates to treat your sister, cousin, friend etc.
Haha thanks Sarah. I like to believe I think with the big brain quite a bit and I'm always trying to make the girls in my life happy. They come before me. I didn't mean to come off shallow if that's how it sounded. :/ I just really like this girl, in both her attractiveness and personality. I really just want to know how I can make her like both of these regarding me. (Along with the other points I mentioned).
Well, you're both at college so you can share that experience with some confidence; things that you like and don't like, find your mutual ones and laugh at them. One or two sincere compliments is fine, but DO NOT gush with them (She'll think you're creepy or lame). Be positive - don't get off on ranting about anything even if you feel strongly about it. Don't TRY to make jokes, but if something strikes you funny, share it. Be honest in your feelings. Don't worry about being awkward, it's often endearing. If you come off as too "smooth", she'll think you're being a player. Don't try to impress her, especially with lies. She'll see right through them. Be as much of "yourself" as you dare, even if the date doesn't work out at least you won't have been a douchebag. At the end of the date, tell you really enjoyed it and would like to see her again. Follow up.
Follow Trinket's advice and you'll be fine. Good luck!
Tell her once she looks great (because she will have gone to some trouble getting ready), talk about her with open questions she will respond with her questions and the conversation will start to flow. Relax she agreed to the date so she's interested - be yourself. Personally i would prefer a dinner date rather than the movies or maybe a mixture of both.
I would avoid boasting about the size of your genitals if I were a you. Likewise don't be too specific about her breasts - admire them, but don't fondle them before the main feature.
Movie with a person she's never met before? Wouldn't be my first choice. "Let's go somewhere dark where we don't have to talk"
If you want her to feel comfortable and secure in the situation let her have the say on where you go and what you do. That doesn't mean leaving it all up to her - give her options, let her choose. It might be worthwhile in the long term to ask if she would have a problem with you eating meat on a date.
Looks are obviously a key motivator for you but i wouldn't get hung up on them in a date situation. Super skinny girls can be every bit as insecure about their body as larger girls. Compliment her, not how she appears.
Silences don't have to be awkward, unless of course they come straight after a question. Don't ask her about anything you don't really care about - she'll know.
Make an effort with your appearance. She will.
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Why not read some stories instead
NEW! Want a quick read for your coffee break? Why not try this... Flash Erotica: Scrubber Bathe, have a shave, and dress well for your first date. A stiff-brim straw hat (boater) and a striped blazer with brass buttons is always a good choice. Don't gulp father's whiskey and leer at mother when they invite you into the parlour to wait for their daughter to descend the stairs. With any luck, she may be a fast girl and flirt by showing a little ankle beneath her gown. Don't ogle, fondle, and make honking sounds when you pin the corsage upon her bosom. Gently place your hand beneath her elbow to direct her in avoiding any horse droppings in the street. Be a gentleman and don't get into fisticuffs with any hooligans who may catcall, whistle, or ask her "How much for a quickie?" When you arrive at the moving picture show, resist putting the whoopee cushion on her chair before she sits (Yes, we know it's a good way to break the ice). Buy her refreshments, but do not (on a first date) put your whatsits through the bottom of the popcorn box before offering her a handful. Inquire of her what her father's curfew time is (example: 10:00 PM, midnight, next Thursday) and do not exceed the limit unless she's a total raver and insists on sex (oral, missionary, anal) in the carriage as you drive around the park before escorting her properly to her door. If she allows a tiny kiss on the cheek at the end of the date, immediately go to your favorite saloon and brag to all your male friends that you "got lucky" using her full name and address to drag her reputation through the muck. NOTE: If sex (ha ha!) occurs during the date, be sure to wear a French letter to avoid pregnancy or social disease. If you consider the date successful, telegram her to request her presence for an engagement for New Year's Eve. Happy 1907!
Just get her laughing. easier said than done, I know. But really, besides her being attracted to you physically, it's probably the most important thing on a first date.
Also when you are walking into and out of a place, open the door but also place your hand on her lower back. Girls like that. It's non-aggressive physical contact but it can also be stimulating to her in many ways. It can make her comfortable and also maybe crave a little more contact by the end of the night.
Remember, funny. Try to be funny but not stupid. It is still the most important thing.
I'm thinking that if you listen to most of the replies in here it will be a short date and you will be lucky to escape with your balls. A few were serious and gave good advice.
First of all - be chill. Be funny. Keep it light and fun and make sure to flirt. It's a first date and you're both in your early twenties. There's no need to get overly caught up in old-fashioned chivalry and proprieties.
You pick the restaurant/bar. You both decide on the movie together (ie. "Hey, what have you seen? In the mood for a comedy? Have you seen XYZ that everyone's talking about?"). No need to make it more complicated than it is. To be honest, I'm more in favour of something like drinks/apps at a cool bar and maybe seeing a bit of live music or something (but not sure what your city offers). Dinner + movie is a very lowkey/formal atmosphere for a first date and sometimes a more dynamic vibe helps keep the connection fresh and interesting.
Topics for conversation - it should just flow, unless you're both extremely introverted. If at a total loss for what to say - ask her questions and keep her talking about herself - but not in a creepy fact-finding way. Talk about places you've traveled to or want to travel to, funny things that have happened to you and your friends, school, TV/music/media/current events. Make sure you're both laughing at various points and keeping it lively. If it has an overly sober tone or feels like a job interview, change the pace.
Do not bring up the following: exes and past relationship issues, desire for a committed relationship, five year plan involving fast-tracking to marriage/kids, health ailments, emotionally traumatic experiences, dead pets or relatives, childhood issues resulting in emo sadness, expectations, overly probing into her privacy, her schedule for the next several weeks etc. Basically - just observe the TMI (too much info) rule.
Even if you're seeing her as the future mother of your children - always downplay.
If you don't plan on kissing her at the end of it or hooking up, flirt enough so that she's not seeing you as a boring friend-zone guy. Make sure she knows you like her. Even subtle things like intimate eye contact, body language, little touches - things like that can go a long way.
Do not bring or send flowers at this stage - it comes across as excessive and desperate.
You have been given a lot of great advice and a lot of terrible advice so it is up to you to figure out which is which I can give you more but that really wont help so all I am going to say is take it very light. When ever I went on a tirst date, the best ones were where we went to a casual dinner in a place that was not too loud so we could talk and get to know each other. I always hated movie first dates. I want to talk, not sit in adark theater wondering what you are like. Be a gentlemen but not a desperate push over either. Chances are she will decide in the first 5 minutes whether she will see you again. Just be yourself because if you dont, you will have to play that role forever and you will slip up! Show her you like her and are interested in being more than friends (assuming you are of course) but dont come on like a desperate school boy on his first date ever.
I guess I did give advice afterall. Just have fun and if it doesnt work out, the next one might.
Be chill there is no need to freak out anymore because the hardest part is out of the way she said yes. Don't worry about meeting her standards because she agreed to go out with you so she obviously saw something in you. Nothing too expensive or upscale its a first day she should feel comfortable and be able to get to know your personality. Relax, KCCO
I know it's a bit late now, but you never updated us. How did it go? Did we give good advice or shitty advice?
I'm a 22 year old college student by the way and so is she. Thank you in advance.
x
