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What advice would you give planet Earth? Options · View
DanielleX
Posted: Thursday, June 13, 2013 10:25:32 AM

Rank: Blonde Bombshell

Joined: 11/6/2011
Posts: 1,317
Location: Liverpool, United Kingdom
If you were an alien visiting our planet, what advice would you give us?



My new story written in collaboration with Buz Bono
overmykneenow
Posted: Thursday, June 13, 2013 10:52:08 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/8/2010
Posts: 968
Location: United Kingdom
Given the aliens' propensity for anal probes it would probably be cut down on processed meats

Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.

Why not read some stories instead
seeker4
Posted: Thursday, June 13, 2013 11:38:41 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 10/17/2012
Posts: 2,851
Location: In the great, beautiful Cosmos, Canada
There's no point in them giving us advice because we'd be too f&cking stubborn to listen. The most important things, though, would be to find a reliable, non-polluting energy source and disarm to the point where only low-level conflict is possible, if that.

What I hope they'd do is give us (as in all nations, not one or two) access to a non-polluting energy source that actually works well enough to completely replace fossil fuels.

And, if they have it, give all nations access to force field technology of some kind. With everyone capable of 100% effective defense, peace would be a lot easier to achieve. Still likely have some terrorism and brushfire conflicts, but major conflicts would be fruitless if no weapons could get through.


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Sweet Tasty Treats

He went looking for an interview. He found something more.

The Professor
Jack_42
Posted: Thursday, June 13, 2013 12:07:10 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/21/2009
Posts: 978
Location: Prague, Czech Republic
It's time you all grew up now and start to live together sensibly you've been around long enough and know the right way to behave even though you don't, (which I now realise is more or less the same advice the alien gave in The Day The Earth Stood Still.). :)
Highwayman
Posted: Saturday, June 15, 2013 8:12:44 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/10/2012
Posts: 1,498
Don't take shit too seriously. You're smaller than you know.

‎"The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible." --Wilde
Guest
Posted: Saturday, June 15, 2013 10:20:30 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,633
IF the aliens had any commonsense, they'd wipe humanity off the planet and leave it that way simply because we don't deserve this planet. all (insert population here) humans just gone. poof. how much would it matter in the grand scheme of things? not a blip. If that wasn't an option, idk what advice to give earth. quit being douchebags to each other and you MIGHT achieve something great?
Buz
Posted: Saturday, June 15, 2013 10:24:17 PM

Rank: The Linebacker

Joined: 3/2/2011
Posts: 5,174
Location: Atlanta, United States
Hey Earth watch out for space debris and don't veer off path.

I have written a new poem. It is called 'Long Twisty Woman.'
You can read it at: http://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/long-twisty-woman.aspxx
Also, if you wish, check out my co-authored a story with the wonderful DanielleX. It is called 'Focus on Sex.'
You can read it at: http://www.lushstories.com/stories/quickie-sex/focused-on-sex-1.aspx

Guest
Posted: Sunday, June 16, 2013 4:49:15 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,633

Get rid of your parasites before they spread to other planets.
danny101
Posted: Monday, July 01, 2013 11:23:16 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 7/10/2011
Posts: 55
Location: Kankakee, United States
forget money and be excellent to one another..... or we will blow you up.


my witty cum-back is on its way
Guest
Posted: Monday, July 01, 2013 11:32:50 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,633
DIE!!!! then come back to life and start over
AdrianCf
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 3:44:12 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 6/10/2013
Posts: 37
Location: United States
The best advice they could give is : Get rid of the Humans.

The Mansion

Prologue

01 - Brianna and Frank

02 - Brianna and Frank

03 - Tom and Mary

04 - Tom and Mary

Summer Time

Cynthia

Gina and Sean
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 6:21:23 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 472,633
Alien: I've got some advice for you.
Me: Ok lay in on me Mr. Alien
Alien: Get rid of fucking Wal-Mart. Why would you want to buy cheap ass shit anyways?
nil4sin
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 6:40:32 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 5/20/2013
Posts: 88
Location: India
Pour Wine Keep loving one another.

Neel
MadMartigan
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 8:24:20 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 6/17/2013
Posts: 1,887
Location: United States
Clone yourself and don't let humans live with you anymore.
naughtynurse
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 10:21:15 AM

Rank: Head Nurse

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 6,468
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
"So long, and thanks for all the fish"



A special thank you to all who read and voted on my competition Quickie, a Recomended Read: Something Borrowed
DanielleX
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 1:42:59 PM

Rank: Blonde Bombshell

Joined: 11/6/2011
Posts: 1,317
Location: Liverpool, United Kingdom
naughtynurse wrote:
"So long, and thanks for all the fish"


I love that book!



My new story written in collaboration with Buz Bono
naughtynurse
Posted: Tuesday, July 02, 2013 2:01:38 PM

Rank: Head Nurse

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 6,468
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
me too...(although I almost wrote, "Earth: Mostly Harmless" evil4)



A special thank you to all who read and voted on my competition Quickie, a Recomended Read: Something Borrowed
DLizze
Posted: Wednesday, July 03, 2013 10:27:38 PM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,501
Carry a towel.

"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
paul_moadib
Posted: Saturday, July 06, 2013 4:53:55 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/31/2013
Posts: 443
Location: Docking bay 94
Enjoy it while it lasts
captainkirkland
Posted: Saturday, July 06, 2013 9:34:05 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/7/2012
Posts: 166
Location: United States
Ease it on the fast food.
Nikki703
Posted: Sunday, July 14, 2013 9:38:22 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 12,329
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
I think good 'ol Abe said it best!! HAHA

MadMartigan
Posted: Sunday, July 14, 2013 10:08:56 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 6/17/2013
Posts: 1,887
Location: United States
Create more intelligent humans on your next go-round.
nazhinaz
Posted: Tuesday, July 16, 2013 3:13:59 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/16/2010
Posts: 293
Location: Longview, United States
I don't think as an aliens coming over to earth could give any advice.
I as an alien, would be busy finding my way on this earth which has
poor and rich, luxury cars and pedestrians, sick due to overeating and malnutrition. dying without medication.
As an alien I would join some crash program to learn some important languages.
And most important, trying to get some cash in my pocket to meet any of the above exigencies.
fish1212
Posted: Tuesday, July 16, 2013 5:26:42 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 231
Location: at sea
Too late, too late she cried as she waved her wooden leg in the air
AriOli101
Posted: Tuesday, July 16, 2013 7:31:14 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/3/2013
Posts: 160
Location: United Kingdom
Educate our leaders, god knows they need it. Pint Drunk

Make love not horcruxes! >^_^<

Check out my stories, you'd be surprised what I can do :)
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