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Adapt Or Die ( From Porn Tube Junkie To Upload Monkey )

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Adapt Or Die ( From Porn Tube Junkie To Upload Monkey )


Got it all figured out now

A way to game the system

Pretend to be Anonymous

Steal a video from your store

Upload it to a YouTube knockoff
Supposedly not mine
Receive legal notice to take it down
Pay the Zero Dollar fine
By then I've stolen fifty more

I adapt
Take from this content producer
Borrow from that sponsor's site
In no time flat
Overnight
Build an online mega warehouse
Giving away everything I jacked for free
All above board
Legally
That it may not be ethical
Is not my concern
Biology Room 101
The lesson you need to learn

I'm adapting
While you all fall behind

Evolving
Climbing the ladder of success

So fucking what if
Your backs are the bottom rungs

Don't take it personally
It's just called Forward Progress

Or better yet, catchphrase
Say it with me now
Adapt or Die

I adapt
While you die
Man, so damn many valid reasons why
Jet skis, in ground swimming pools
Vacation homes, half a dozen sports cars
While you sit there crying over spilled milk
Like a bunch of broke ass loser fools
I'm making bank, partying hard
Ripping twenty minute video scenes
Rating each Five Stars

I'm adapting
From your average porno pimp

Evolving
Into an upright walking upload chimp

Trash talking in the online forums
Laying the smack down
About how you can't touch me
Bros like me rule this town

Let me sum it up
This industry?
It's all about me
Mine to run over roughshod rampant as I please
No longer dwelling in Mom's basement
Got my own place now
Living large in a palace
Boo-hoo
Threatened with foreclosure, you cry foul
About how I give away your merchandise freely
As I auction high volume banner space
Boasting enlargement of the phallus

Worldwide
From everywhere people flock
Like flies congregate on shit
They don't even know the truth of it
Stupid horny bastards
In such a hurry to jerk themselves off
Millions of insignificant insects
Whipping out their tiny dicks
While a percentage write electronic checks
Purchasing the latest cock supersizing fix

Because I give them such a great deal
They keep coming back
Through every social bookmark and pin tack
Can't seem to get their fill
So what if I can't sell the sex I steal?
Front page of Google, Bing, Yahoo
Here is the real deal
I'm crowned King of the Hill
Illusion search engine bots can't see though
My vast empire of porn

Unscathed by your loathing
Not phased by your scorn
Sitting high in my ivory banana tree
Where you can never touch me
Zero business experience
Not a single college degree
Just your average porno junkie pimp
Who chose to adapt
Evolving into an upright walking upload chimp

Nothing complicated here
So simple a monkey can do it
I highly suggest you should give it a try


Adapt

Or

Die
Active Ink Slinger
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This concludes your public service announcement from Magnetron.

In the event of a real emergency, bend over with your head tucked between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.
Lurker
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I never saw this. Love it, Magnetron.