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RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar Options · View
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 9:01:14 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,904
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent




Need a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink? If so, you’ve come to the right gin joint.

RUMPLATIONS features strong coffee, cheap booze, dirty floors, loose women, indecent men, forum whores, and if you're really on a losing streak, a cranky old fart behind, and/or under, the well-used bar.
So welcome. The lava lamp is now on.


Rumple Foreskin rr

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
MMonroe
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 9:23:15 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/10/2009
Posts: 1,893
Location: United Kingdom
I watched the film Perfume: The Story Of A Murderer the other day and need someone to talk to about it. I love it!! Intriguing yet weird storyline, brilliant acting and beautifully shot!



*Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?*



RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 9:35:57 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,904
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
MMonroe wrote:
I watched the film Perfume: The Story Of A Murderer the other day and need someone to talk to about it. I love it!! Intriguing yet weird storyline, brilliant acting and beautifully shot!

Not trying to run off business, you understand, but a "Talking About the Movies" sort of thread might attract a lot of interest. You're always welcome here (this joint ain't got NO standards) but why not give it a shot?

Rumple Foreskin rr

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Lydia_
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 9:46:52 AM

Rank: Forum Whore

Joined: 7/9/2009
Posts: 2,523
Location: Cuffed to the forums, having things my way, United
"loose women" Eh, Rumple?
You forgot Forum Whores!

[chuckles about Will's comment about "smarts"]



Wishing you well,
Lydia


Please check out:
You give Such Sweet Punishment
My love poem: Gone From Me
An office part takes an interesting turn in Drunk Off Lust
Friends exploring their newly found affection in Wake Up Shower
I've also finally found the Best Cure for Boredom
Pixie
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 9:56:26 AM

Rank: Flutterby Pharie

Joined: 9/27/2007
Posts: 5,983
Location: Never, Never Land, United States
For those of you who know that I am out of a job right now, guess what?? I have a job interview!!! Yay me! Its the same type of work that I was doing before, so I am comfortable with that AND it's a job!!

See, this is the kinda stuff you can talk about in a bar! No drinks for me though.....gotta be sober for the interview! LOL

♥ Listen, touch, and look around in the air and on the ground. If you watch all nature's things, you might just see a fairy's wings. ♥
Lydia_
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 10:00:50 AM

Rank: Forum Whore

Joined: 7/9/2009
Posts: 2,523
Location: Cuffed to the forums, having things my way, United
Pixie wrote:
For those of you who know that I am out of a job right now, guess what?? I have a job interview!!! Yay me! Its the same type of work that I was doing before, so I am comfortable with that AND it's a job!!

See, this is the kinda stuff you can talk about in a bar! No drinks for me though.....gotta be sober for the interview! LOL


hello1 Good luck on your interview, Pixie!

Wishing you well,
Lydia


Please check out:
You give Such Sweet Punishment
My love poem: Gone From Me
An office part takes an interesting turn in Drunk Off Lust
Friends exploring their newly found affection in Wake Up Shower
I've also finally found the Best Cure for Boredom
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 10:09:07 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,904
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Lady_Lydia wrote:
Pixie wrote:
For those of you who know that I am out of a job right now, guess what?? I have a job interview!!! Yay me! Its the same type of work that I was doing before, so I am comfortable with that AND it's a job!!

See, this is the kinda stuff you can talk about in a bar! No drinks for me though.....gotta be sober for the interview! LOL


hello1 Good luck on your interview, Pixie!

Yes indeed. We'll chill the champagne for a post-hiring celebration. Okay, so it's really, Sloe Gin Fizz. Drink enough of the stuff and you'll never notice the difference.

YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE! THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.

My latest insult to good taste and English letters, OUTDOOR ABBY: a cautionary tale, has just been posted. So what else is know, you ask.? This one is supposed to be, funny, or at least a bit amusing, sorta.

Anyway, check 'er out (there's a link in my slig line) and let me know what you think.

Rumple Foreskin rr

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
LushPrincess
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 10:36:35 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/17/2008
Posts: 1,177
Location: AZ
I spent a good 2hrs washing and brushing my fake christmas hair yesterday. I thought it would lose some of it’s natural curls but it didn’t – it’s not as good as having regular extensions that I can wear all day and not worry about them clipping off but I’ll take what I can get. I missed them!

THANKS Ram!

DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 12:48:50 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Is this the place I heard has "Warm beer and cold women"???
Hmmm...give me a double bourbon with a bourbon chaser...it's one of those days...put it on my tab...


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 1:01:18 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
I'm thinking many bottles of BudIce beer ,, several packs of Camel non filters ,, and all the lies you folks want to tell.

Oh ,, and can I stomp the cigarette butts out on the floor??
redhotmommacita
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 1:09:41 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/9/2009
Posts: 1,124
Location: In my own little world., United States
shameless009 wrote:
I'm thinking many bottles of BudIce beer ,, several packs of Camel non filters ,, and all the lies you folks want to tell.

Oh ,, and can I stomp the cigarette butts out on the floor??


Any thing my little Sin Verguenza wants to do or have here is the place with all the women he could ever dream of as long as he does not let his buddy Marcos tell any more cheistes mongos (lame jokes).



Behind every strong soldier there is even a stronger woman who raised him " Proud Army Mom"


Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 1:12:17 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
Pixie wrote:
For those of you who know that I am out of a job right now, guess what?? I have a job interview!!! Yay me! Its the same type of work that I was doing before, so I am comfortable with that AND it's a job!!

See, this is the kinda stuff you can talk about in a bar! No drinks for me though.....gotta be sober for the interview! LOL


hello2 Strongs for you pixie, babe! I hope all goes well:)
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 1:14:04 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Hey Shameless...can you spare a cigarette? I left mine in the machine...


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:35:49 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
redhotmommacita wrote:
shameless009 wrote:
I'm thinking many bottles of BudIce beer ,, several packs of Camel non filters ,, and all the lies you folks want to tell.

Oh ,, and can I stomp the cigarette butts out on the floor??


Any thing my little Sin Verguenza wants to do or have here is the place with all the women he could ever dream of as long as he does not let his buddy Marcos tell any more cheistes mongos (lame jokes).
I have no control over his actions.
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:37:44 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,904
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
shameless009 wrote:
I'm thinking many bottles of BudIce beer ,, several packs of Camel non filters ,, and all the lies you folks want to tell.

Oh ,, and can I stomp the cigarette butts out on the floor??


Wimp. Crush 'em out in the palm of your hand, you know, like the forum whores all do.

Drinks are on Shameless! (Don't bother hunting, I've hidden all the "good" stuff, ie: over two weeks old.

Rumple Foreskin rr

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:37:50 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
Exakta66 wrote:
Hey Shameless...can you spare a cigarette? I left mine in the machine...
I will fix you right up. ,, could you hand me another BudIce Please???
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:39:02 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
Exakta66 wrote:
Hey Shameless...can you spare a cigarette? I left mine in the machine...
I will fix you right up. ,, could you hand me another BudIce Please???
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:50:01 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,904
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Lady_Lydia wrote:
"loose women" Eh, Rumple?
You forgot Forum Whores!

[chuckles about Will's comment about "smarts"]


Egads, he says, smacking his head.

Forgive me, my Lady Lydia. The oversight is now corrected.

Rumple Foreskin rr

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 2:55:08 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Speaking of bars...

A man walks into a bar with a St. Bernard and asks for a martini. The dog
requests a double martini.

The bartender says to the man "So you're a ventriloquist. Big deal. We don't
serve dogs in here."

The man gets up to go to the men's room, and the dog again requests his drink.
The bartender is amazed. "Good God, you can talk. Will you do a favor for me?"

The dog replies, "What's in it for me?"

The bartender goes to the cash register and takes out a $20 bill. "Here's $20.
Go across the street to Riley's bar and tell the guys in there that they are a
bunch of wimps and that our softball team will whip their a**es when we play
them this weekend."

The dog goes out. His owner returns and asks "Where's Rex?"

The bartender says "He went across the street to do me a favor." The
owner is visibly upset and says "I don't let Rex out alone!"

The dog's owner leaves immediately to retrieve Rex, but Rex is not across the
street. He is in the gutter in front of the bar going at it fast and hard with
an Irish Setter. The owner is amazed. "Rex, what's come over you? You've
never done anything like this before." Rex responds, "I've never had money
before."


occasion5


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:03:49 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
Good ,, just ,, Good !!
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:16:23 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Hey Shameless...did you get that beer yet??? I'll tell you the service in this place sucks...
Anyway, here's something to think about while you're having that beer...

It is time to do a comparison between two things treasured by men, beer and pussy...

A beer is always wet.
A pussy needs encouragement.
Advantage: Beer.

A beer tastes horrible served hot.
A pussy tastes better served hot.
Advantage: Pussy.

Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied.
Having an ice cold pussy makes you Hillary Clinton.
Advantage: Beer.

Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.
Pussy does not.
advantage: Tie

If you get a hair in your teeth
consuming pussy, you are not disgusted.
Advantage: Pussy

24 beers come in a box.
A pussy is a box you can come in.
Advantage: Pussy

Too much head makes you mad at the
person giving you a beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is
still edible.
Advantage: Beer.

If you come home smelling like beer,
your wife may get mad. If you come home
smelling like pussy, she will definitely get mad.
Advantage: Beer.

6 beers in a night and you better not
drive. 6 pussies in a night and you
have done all the driving you need.
Advantage: Pussy

Buy too much beer and you will get fat.
Buy too much pussy and you will get poor.
Advantage: Tie

It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game.
You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game.
Advantage: Pussy

If a cop smells beer on your breath,
you are going to get a breathalyzer.
If a cop smells pussy on your breath,
you are going to get a high five.
Advantage: Pussy

With beer, bigger is better.
Advantage: beer.

Wearing a condom does not make a beer
any less enjoyable.
Advantage: beer.

Pussy can make you see God. Beer can
make you see the porcelain god.
Advantage: Pussy

If you think all day about the next pussy
you will have, you are normal.
If you think all day about your next beer,
you are an alcoholic.
Advantage: Pussy

Peeling labels off of beers is fun.
Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.
Advantage: Pussy.

If you try to snag a beer at work,
you get fired. If you try to snag a pussy
at work, you get hit with sexual harassment.
Advantage: Tie

If you suddenly drop a beer, it may
break. If you suddenly drop a pussy,
it may hunt you down like the dog you are.
Advantage: Beer.

If you change to another beer, your
old brand will gladly have you back.
Advantage: Beer.

The best pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Pussy.

The worst pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Beer.

Bad beer: Schlitz, PBR, Old Swill.
Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright.
Advantage: Tie

Good beer: Samuel Adams, Moosehead,
Pete's Wicked Winter Brew.
Good pussy: Almost all but the above.
Advantage Pussy.

The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

occasion5


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:21:02 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
Good stuff kid.. !!
techgoddess
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:21:27 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/9/2008
Posts: 1,980
Location: In my own little world, United States
Quote:
The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.


occasion5

~~Tech
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do...
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:27:17 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
And if you ever do get that beer you can ponder:

25 Good Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women
1. You can enjoy a beer all month long
2. Beer stains wash out
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer
4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play baseball
5. When you beer goes flat, you toss it out
6. Hangovers go away
7. A beer labels come off without a fight
8. Beer is never late
9. Beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer
10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer
11. Beer never gets a headache
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head
15. A beer always goes down easy
16. You can have more than one beer a night and not feel guilty
17. You can share a beer with your friends
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer
19. Beer is always wet
20. Beer doesn't demand equality
21. You can have a beer in public
22. A beer doesn't care when you come
23. A frigid beer is a good beer
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it taste good
25. If you change beers you don't have to pay alimony

occasion5


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

SilverArdorDragon
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:34:29 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/7/2009
Posts: 1,774
Location: Helena, Montana, United States
Exakta66 wrote:
And if you ever do get that beer you can ponder:

25 Good Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women
1. You can enjoy a beer all month long
2. Beer stains wash out
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer
4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play baseball
5. When you beer goes flat, you toss it out
6. Hangovers go away
7. A beer labels come off without a fight
8. Beer is never late
9. Beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer
10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer
11. Beer never gets a headache
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head
15. A beer always goes down easy
16. You can have more than one beer a night and not feel guilty
17. You can share a beer with your friends
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer
19. Beer is always wet
20. Beer doesn't demand equality
21. You can have a beer in public
22. A beer doesn't care when you come
23. A frigid beer is a good beer
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it taste good
25. If you change beers you don't have to pay alimony

occasion5


Us Women can say the same things about why beer is better than men. icon_biggrin
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:45:20 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
SilverArdorDragon wrote:
Exakta66 wrote:
And if you ever do get that beer you can ponder:

25 Good Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women
1. You can enjoy a beer all month long
2. Beer stains wash out
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer
4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play baseball
5. When you beer goes flat, you toss it out
6. Hangovers go away
7. A beer labels come off without a fight
8. Beer is never late
9. Beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer
10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer
11. Beer never gets a headache
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head
15. A beer always goes down easy
16. You can have more than one beer a night and not feel guilty
17. You can share a beer with your friends
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer
19. Beer is always wet
20. Beer doesn't demand equality
21. You can have a beer in public
22. A beer doesn't care when you come
23. A frigid beer is a good beer
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it taste good
25. If you change beers you don't have to pay alimony

occasion5


Us Women can say the same things about why beer is better than men. icon_biggrin


I didn't post that list...it was actually much longer...


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

SilverArdorDragon
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:47:35 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/7/2009
Posts: 1,774
Location: Helena, Montana, United States
Okay I think I have lost my mind. Has anyone seen it?dontknow
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:53:43 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 537,825
here it is ,, do you want it back??
SilverArdorDragon
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:54:52 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/7/2009
Posts: 1,774
Location: Helena, Montana, United States
Hmm... maybe not. It's always getting me into truble.laughing6
DirtyMartini
Posted: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 3:55:27 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,791
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
I'd give you a piece of my mind, but I really don't have much to spare...

Since we are hanging out in a bar, I have one more bar joke...well, for now...

3 Ducks walk into a bar, The Bartender thinks thats strange but they have money and are paying customers.

He walks up to the first duck, and says "so fella... what's yer name..how ya been doing?

The duck smiles up and says "I am Huey, and I am pretty good, I been outside playing in puddles all day long, thats as good as it gets with a duck, I'll have a Beer.

So he serves the Duck and moves to the 2nd Duck "how about you?"

The 2nd Duck smiles and says "I'm Dewy, and I am pretty good too, I have been outside playing in puddles all day long too, thats as good as it get's for a duck...I'll have a scotch, neat

Now the Bartender see's how this is going and moves to the 3rd duck "I bet your name's Lewy

The 3rd duck smiles and shakes his head "No...I'm Puddles

occasion5


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

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