07 Apr 2014 07:39
Sorry I'm such an adorable bitch.
11 Feb 2014 04:53
Valentine's Day gift idea: a boquet of breakfast burritos
05 Feb 2014 05:44
Wednesday is cancelled. Everyone can go back to bed
24 Nov 2013 05:35
I have a feeling something is missing this Sunday morning. I have a craving or a yearning or a hunger for something, maybe it's tater tots.
22 Nov 2013 07:24
Of course there are no stupid questions. Why would you even ask me that? Moron.
10 Nov 2013 09:17
06 Nov 2013 04:44
Who delivers decent mac and cheese before 7am in Texas? PM me with the info, thanks.
04 Nov 2013 06:12
Desperate to know men's opinions on boobs, I joined lush. Boobs. That's why we're all here, isn't it?
03 Nov 2013 01:08
Fall back! Unless you're drunk. Stumble around and fall forward flat on your face or something.
31 Oct 2013 03:24
My bastarding bed doesn't want to sleep with me.
18 Aug 2013 21:22
I'm sleepy and I want to be spooned by the night breeze, its fingers in my hair.
15 Dec 2012 13:53
excessively avoiding moderation
08 Dec 2012 11:54
funny how hearts are just the right size to fit in a person's hand. so squeezable.
02 Dec 2012 14:09
YOU GUYS ARE SO GREAT I CAN'T HANDLE IT OK sorry for yelling.
01 Dec 2012 06:48
I wish cum tasted like the cream cheese frosting that's on my breakfast cupcake. What?