Says "Porn's greatest use for me is its many eye makeup ideas."
Says "I'm takin' what they givin', cause I'm twerkin' for a livin'"
Says "Or not. Lol. 420 bitches"
Says "My man Austin Trout's about to make some believers"
Says "Accept all. Love many. Trust few. Surrender to one."
Says "Okay guys: close your eyes, and picture the most attractive partner you could realistically be with.
No, not her. What are you, high? Now go look in the mirror then try again."
Says "IDEA: Gloryhole, but for tacos."
Says "See you guys back soon - gotta handle some business."
Says "Guys in hats. It either really works or it really doesn't. And if you're not sure whether or not it works for you: it doesn't."
Says "My dream is to open a bar that is completely normal, except all the beer taps are dildos. And if you ask why, you get kicked out."
Says ""Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?" "SHAFT!" "Damn right..."
"
Says ""The reason I hold on, is I need this hole gone.""
Says "Jeez, its like there's barely any acceptable ways to tell your therapist that her son is super hot.
Something about "boundaries", etc."
Says "When the store clerk asks me "debit or credit", I always get an ego boost, like "wow, this guy thinks I'm capable of getting approved for credit cards!" Appearances matter, folks."