Forum posts made by metilda

Topic four questions about the stories here on Lush?
Posted 09 Jul 2014 18:28

Hello Ladies,

Since I'm nearing my 1000th post I was thinking about a question for you ladies. (Guys if you want to answer go ahead). I actually came up with four.

1 - Do you enjoy reading the stories here on Lush?

2- Do you prefer nonfiction or fiction?

3 - What type of stories is your favorite?

4 - Do you masturbate when you read the stories?

Thank You to all that response.

1) Yes - I love to read. Don't always have the time, but do whenever I can.
2) Fiction for sex fantasy based stuff. Memoirs are great, though.
3) What type of stories - lately I've been into 50-50 stories (strong plot regarding both erotica and non-erotica story lines in one book)
4) Not usually. If I do it's an exceptional day - and I'm alone.

Topic Strange or normal kink?
Posted 09 Jul 2014 18:26

I don't think it's a fetish persay - just something guys want to do in order to play with their jizz.

Topic Holding his cock
Posted 08 Jul 2014 16:49

Have you ever held a guys dick whilst he was having a wee wee?

If so what did it make you feel like?

It was either me or the nurse.
If anyone thinks I'm going to let someone else touch my husband's cock while I'm right there they've lost their mind.

Topic What's your WIP (work in progress) about?
Posted 08 Jul 2014 00:08

I'm currently writing the porno version of the movie The Cube. I'm at 80% so it might be published in a few days...


Love it.

Topic Fuck- and Suck-fest versus erotic story
Posted 07 Jul 2014 23:59

Eroticism takes many forms. My preferred one involves anticipation. The situation engages and includes more than a tease, and offers a promise of ever-more-erotic circumstances and actions.

Then there's the fuck- and suck-fest. Guy meets girl guys fucks girl guy meets another girl, girl sucks guy with more fellatio and intercourse per page than apostrophes.

Dos anyone else encounter a challenge when narrating an "anticipation" story that needs gratuitous insertion of fuck- and suck-fest to get past the story reviewers? When I submit a chapter in which nobody experiences an orgasm for two whole paragraphs, I occasionally find that I've fallen short of the "fest" quota and am told to resubmit.

Lush is my first experience with an erotic story site. Did I pick the wrong one? I'm simply not interested in randomly injecting "OH MY GOD I'M CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMING" every few sentences to satisfy someone else's prescribed dose or someone else's definition of what "real" eroticism is.

Anybody else's view? Thanks

By 'resubmit' do you mean Lush editors are bumping it - or the reading public gave it a bit of a thumbs down? For stories that don't have sex in every 'chapter' Lush has the 'novel' and 'love stories' category.

I publish for free here but I also self-publish. I follow the characters or the situation - and the sex, how frequent and how explicit, is very particular to the overall concept at hand and who the narrator actually is.

I refer to all written sex stories as 'erotica' - I call visual sex 'pornography'. (But I also use 'pornography' in a generic way - it has multiple definitions so sometimes I toss it around to mean 'graphic' (sex or no-sex) etc. This bugs some people to no end)

When it comes to erotica I would actually like to see authors adopting tags that address the relation of story-to-sex. Sometimes I want more story than sex - very plot heavy. Sometimes I want just stroke stories. I love it all - and would like to be able to more easily search for and find stories that would satisfy my interests (and from what I hear: a lot of readers AND authors agree with me)

These are my terms and how I use them:

1) Stroke : (what you're referring to as suck/fuck fest)
Mostly sex. Might be all sex, in fact. Could be a single short story or a multi-chapter story, but not much in regard to having a fully developed, non-sex plot.

When I write stroke stories they're usually direct RE the language and descriptions.

2) Build-up:
Stories that introduce one or more characters first, have a notable non-sex plot or situation develop.

Usually for me the sex ends up at the end. So something like: Intro character, establish situation, meet other individual, sex event ensues. Often the sex is the true climax of the short story - the culmination of a relationship, for example.

3) 50-50:
Stories that half a fully developed sex-significant plot and a fully developed non-sex significant plot

Example: a couple's sex life makes up the 'erotica' part of the story and a strong non-sex plot such as the couple's struggle to run a business together.

4) Light:
Sex is light, suggestive, if it's there at all.

These might be seduction stories that culminate in foreplay but no sex - or things like erotic poetry without sex in it - or even stories that have sex, but it plays a small, lesser roll overall.

Tags that are helpful for your readers: No-sex, plot-heavy. I haven't used these yet here at Lush but at other sites sometimes these two are required to let readers know what to expect per the content.

A lot of people love 50-50, Light, and Build-up. You find these more often than Stroke stories when you buy erotica novellas and novels at places like All-Romance.

In almost all of my stories - Stroke, Buildup, 50-50, or Light - I have character development and some backstory there. I write to explore character and situational concepts - always with the idea that maybe one day I'll take the short story and turn it into a novella or a novel.

I just ensure that the non-sex elements don't outshine the sex elements when it comes to Stroke stories. I always try to build anticipation and tension and maintain it properly. The different formats require different attentions - but overall that's how it breaks down for me.

Topic do you want him to shave his cock area for YOU?
Posted 05 Jul 2014 00:52

Nope - I prefer him el naturel.

Topic Size Vs. Sensitivity
Posted 01 Jul 2014 19:39

Hmm - not sure. I don't think so. My nipples are very small but I can orgasm just by stimulating them the right way.

Topic Gay For Pay! "Straight" men in gay porn.
Posted 30 Jun 2014 07:18

The vast majority of straight porn actors only do straight porn. The few that cross over, I think, must have some bisexuality, even if they state that they are straight.

Some people just don't see sex as anything more than a fuck.

I'm not bisexual or necessarily attracted to women, but I've had sex with them. *shrug

Topic Gay For Pay! "Straight" men in gay porn.
Posted 29 Jun 2014 17:24

I'm not talking about producing it, I'm talking about being in it.
Women also get paid more for lesbian porn, so the same question applies.

That's what I'm referring to, being in it. People don't seem to puzzle so much when women do it.
Maybe you are, though.

We're talking about people who aren't attracted to each other to begin with (even goes for straight) having sex.

It's not the same as two people hooking up on a weekend or being married. They're paid to have sex, that's the driving concept.

Your sexuality and attraction doesn't seem to factor in much, that's not the point.

They are not approaching sex in porn in the same way you or I might approach sex for enjoyment / love / need.

Topic Gay For Pay! "Straight" men in gay porn.
Posted 29 Jun 2014 14:15

I read an article by Brad Hammer about this, in the Huffington Post. I looked up a list of gay porn actors in The Sword and found that of the 100, 23 were straight and of those, 19 had been a bottom in films.
Do you think that a guy can really identify as straight when he makes a living by having a cock in his ass?
Why would a straight man pick such a profession? If it is purely money, why not do straight porn.

Straight women produce lesbian porn all the time - people don't stumble over that for a second. Why is it that men don't see gay-acting the same way?

Conversely, couldn't a gay male pretend to be straight without it actually skewing his sexuality?

Topic spank your man ?
Posted 29 Jun 2014 09:42

Foreplay - yes.
It irritates him after a certain point and I love the response - and he knows it.

Topic how do you know you've 'arrived' as an author?
Posted 29 Jun 2014 09:41

Ah here we go: When people stalk you online.

That's always lovely.


Topic Impregnation or impregnation risk
Posted 29 Jun 2014 02:17

I know women get the urge to get pregnant and is something they may not realize, but many men out there also feel the compelling urge to mate just as bad. And I am not talking about just wanting to fuck, but men who get the urge to take a woman with the full intent on making her pregnant.

I'm just curious how women cope with or deal with these urges when they hit you.

I have several children - but only one time did I feel any desire to get pregnant. That was when my husband was deploying and I was certain I wouldn't see him again. What did I do? We had our youngest.

I never had those urges otherwise, however. Most people experience pregnancy from: Damn! I'm freaking pregnant - WTF!

And so I'll never really understand what it was like for my (now) husband to go over 25 years of his life wanting children and never having any.

Topic What is an 'alpha male'
Posted 28 Jun 2014 17:01

Well, I may differ from what others think.

My PERFECT vision of an "alpha male" in my mind is a muscular man, tall, chiseled face, strong hands, well endowed. His personality would be strong willed, a bit stubborn, courageous, faithful, leaderly, selfless, attentive, but ultimately submissive to his female partner (considerate of her wishes, a big softie basically). He has the libido of a monster and the passion of an animal in desperation too... 100% man :-"

However, there is no clear definition of an "alpha male," because humans have been tweaking the playing field every two hundred years. It is in 2014 that the United States is seeing a huge influx of single working mothers (or women in general) that have no male present period, but are easily maintaining and providing for their household. Its almost become a norm here. On the other hand, there are some societies in the world that maintain 100% male dominance. Some places even have a mixture of both. Hell, some tribes in Africa are strict matriarchies where women run the show!

My REALISTIC vision of an "alpha male" would be the husband of the family who is the sole breadwinner for the family while the wife takes care of the kids and the house (stereotypical household). On an animal standpoint, he claimed the female, mated and produced offspring with her, protects his mate and offspring, provides ($) for said family, and typically has the upper hand in decision making. However, the alpha male has consideration and gentleness for his female, treating her with respect and remembering that SHE raises his kids and hunts too. He's willing to stick around through the good, the bad, and the ugly. He does deeds without any expectation of anything in return. He satisfies her needs without being asked. He's sensitive to the ones he loves and senses when something is wrong.

"Happy wife...happy life!"

My view is similar to this - thusly - I stick to my disagreement that my emotional male characters aren't alpha.

Just because someone has a rough time and lets someone in - emotionally - doesn't demote them. In fact, by the above quoted examples, you HAVE to be in touch with your emotions lest you're just a hired hand to fend off the encroaching beasts. (IE: it takes heart and love to care for a family and put others first, emotionally)

Topic Does your man ask you to dress like a nurse/babysitter/teacher/secretary etc. ?
Posted 28 Jun 2014 00:29

Oh blech - I love dressing up and roleplaying, my husband just doesn't get it.

"Why are you dressed like that?"

Oh nevermind - nothing makes a girl feel dumber than when she gets some sexy clothes and only gets "What's with your eyebrows?" in response angry7

Topic What is an 'alpha male'
Posted 28 Jun 2014 00:27

What does it mean to be 'alpha male'?

This has actually drawn me up short. I have a very particular concept in mind, here - but apparently my interpretation of this is different from others. I'm curious as to what women, here, think.

Topic Feeling the follow up
Posted 27 Jun 2014 12:13

Yes, balls and testes are ugly words, how about calling them chambers of fertility?

LOL Thanks - I needed a good laugh.

Topic Feeling the follow up
Posted 26 Jun 2014 23:47

Love it. I just wish there was a more erotic word for them.

Balls, testes, nuts. I mean come on.
Until I find a more appealing word it won't surface much in my writing.

Topic What does it feel like to have a cock in a dry pussy?
Posted 26 Jun 2014 09:44

When you're older - dry and turned on just happens sometimes. Why stop having sex just because? Saliva, a vigorous finger fuck (does wonders), lube - whatever you need to get wet and get fucked. Your body's natural wetness will follow along soon enough.

And at least in regard to men who are sized like my husband: dry isn't even possible. Too much skin friction.

Topic Testicle Size
Posted 25 Jun 2014 10:31

For how many males I've been with I have never paid attention - at all. Not that I don't play with them, because I do ;) But because I just don't spend time associating A with B and C.

Topic Cock curvature: What's your pleasure?
Posted 25 Jun 2014 09:56

Ladies, does penis curvature, either forward, backward, or sideways do anything for you pleasure-wise or doesn't it matter? Do you prefer straight cocks, or with a curve?

My husband's cock curves down - which makes for some intense doggy-style (both vag and anal). And deepthroating is a bit easier for it.

Topic Strong (EI: well rounded) female characters - and a truth few want to hear
Posted 25 Jun 2014 09:49

This comes up in my writing community often: Strong female characters. People often make the argument that we need more of them. Of course this isn't referring to superhero females or armed assassins like Black Widow or Agent Smith. This is in regard to the depth and breadth of the character: female characters who are well-rounded / well written.

Now people often argue about what is a well-written female character. Sometimes they cite narrator voice as a reason for why a character isn't very strong. Sometimes it's how she handles a situation and whether or not that makes her strong. There's no unified agreement. Therefor this is a topic with a lot of debates.

However - I came across this article:

The author of said article spends a lot of time commenting on female characters in children's animated movies. Only later does she bring up a movie that showcases humans: The Hobbit.

None the less: I'm going to try to NOT focus on any of that. Instead, she makes a list at the end of the article for 'movie producers' which means 'script writers' which really means 'all storytellers' - because movies and books all start the same: with words on paper.

1: After being introduced, does your Strong Female Character then fail to do anything fundamentally significant to the outcome of the plot? Anything at all?

2: If she does accomplish something plot-significant, is it primarily getting raped, beaten, or killed to motivate a male hero? Or deciding to have sex with/not have sex with/agreeing to date/deciding to break up with a male hero? Or nagging a male hero into growing up, or nagging him to stop being so heroic? Basically, does she only exist to service the male hero’s needs, development, or motivations?

3: Could your Strong Female Character be seamlessly replaced with a floor lamp with some useful information written on it to help a male hero?

4: Is a fundamental point of your plot that your Strong Female Character is the strongest, smartest, meanest, toughest, or most experienced character in the story—until the protagonist arrives?

5: …or worse, does he enter the story as a bumbling fuck-up, but spend the whole movie rapidly evolving past her, while she stays entirely static, and even cheers him on? Does your Strong Female Character exist primarily so the protagonist can impress her?

6: It’s nice if she’s hyper-cool, but does she only start off that way so a male hero will look even cooler by comparison when he rescues or surpasses her?

7: Is she so strong and capable that she’s never needed rescuing before now, but once the plot kicks into gear, she’s suddenly captured or threatened by the villain, and needs the hero’s intervention? Is breaking down her pride a fundamental part of the story?

8: Does she disappear entirely for the second half/third act of the film, for any reason other than because she’s doing something significant to the plot (besides being a hostage, or dying)?

If you can honestly answer “no” to every one of these questions, you might actually have a Strong Female Character worthy of the name. Congratulations!

Now! After reading her list I realized something that was a bit shocking.
Something that a lot of women probably don't believe or don't want to hear. Something a lot of erotica writers don't even want to hear.

Ana Steel - Yes - 50 Shades of Grey - is a Strong Female Character.

She carries the whole story forward. She's active in her plot, Christian's Plot, and the lives of others. She begins with a Strong, forward-moving purpose for herself (graduate - and then work in the publishing industry). She has her own solid set of values and opinions - and if she doesn't have experience with something she is apt to shape her values and opinions right quickly with first experiences. She's opinionated, headstrong, defends herself (all the time). Now, in the end of the story she makes the choice to be a stay at home mother (like millions of women - including myself - have done. It's just a temporary thing)

In fact - she's such a strong PERSON that where other women judge her negatively she only becomes more solid and sure of herself as a person.(these women see Christian as an abuser - and they want Ana to LEAVE him - and she doesn't. Instead, she stays and helps him get past some of his issues)

But yet - in another forum where this was being discussed when I dared lay out all the many ways that the much hated and much loathed Ana Steel satisfies every single argument FOR more strong female characters - people really got pissed.

They didn't want to accept that someone such as Ana could satisfy anything such as a Strong Person concept. They see her as weak - all because she helped someone who was psychologically disturbed while she stayed in a relationship with him.


So what is it that the majority of female readers WANT?

They don't want Strong (well rounded) Female Characters - I believe (though I will continue to write them). What the Modern Female Reader wants is a Well Rounded female character who makes the choices in a relationship or situation that the reader WOULD MAKE.

I found Ana's character to be very irritating - but I liked the fact that she did stay and she helped Christian (though yes I know many women in real life do the same and suffer for it).

And many women don't like Ana for that exact same reason. Though she's well written and well-rounded, her few choices make her highly questionable. They wanted her to leave Christian and find a nice, lovely boy - like what's his name that tried to rape her. Yes, like him (lol)

So demanding more ' strong female characters ' isn't good enough - they have to make the right choices, apparently.

And like hell I'm going to throw away a good story just to please social pressures. As an author I'm here to explore and conquer the unexplored and the unconquered. And if that means I want to write a story about a BDSM couple - and she stays - and he has moments where he's a dick . . . then that's what I'll do.

Topic What's your writing process for erotica? (shorts or longer works)
Posted 24 Jun 2014 10:06

I think I enjoy short stories so much because they're predictable for me to write. Sit down for a few hours - if the idea is smooth in my head - it won't take me long to work through it.

When things get longer I have to plot and plan, Q and A, and all sorts of other things to bring out hte full story. I'm a strong believer in erotica or romance erotica that has a strong non-erotica plot, so I try to have a balance. My stories are like two wrapped up in one: the erotic elements (sexualy / sex life) and everything else.

The everything else is difficult to work on.

So I usually have a clearcut thought for the beginning and I sit and write until it runs to an end (a few chapters, maybe). Then I sit, look over my story so far, and figure out who my characters are, what's going on, what is the erotica plot, and what is the non-erotica plot. Then I write outlines or flow charts to figure out where the non-erotica elements need to go next. The rest of the story will go in spurts like this - write for a few chapters / plot the next few / write / plot . . . eventually I climb to the end. Revision can then involve a significant overhaul of the beginning - or not. I try to avoid that.

My current WIP is a historical flavored novel (not regency or some such) - but it's a fictional setting, fictional government and politics gone amuck. I had to invent cultures, religions, economics and landscapes - but it's not deep fantasy, it's on the edge of 'this could be real'.

Topic What qualities do you esteem the most in a relationship?
Posted 24 Jun 2014 09:55

A pretty general question. But when seeking a new relationship I am pretty superficial. I'm a sucker for a pretty face and sculpted body. That raw attraction is a compelling and powerful. However, when I am in a relationship, it all changes. It quickly goes from the physical into the emotional and even spiritual. I desire loyalty, commitment, and trust. The physical stuff is easy. The rest is hard work and effort. Probably why many people play out they chemistry thing and move on. Simpler than dealing with all those emotions.

"I'll call you sometime."

"Yeah, right!"

That's true - people would rather avoid the more intense issues. Even in marriage that can be the case.

But you also have to be with someone who is worth it - who, when together - it feels 2nd nature to work on these things and secure a solid relationship. And both people have to share the same level of commitment and desire.

After being married for 11 years I appreciate straight forward conversation when it comes to tense issues in order to avoid generalizations, miscommunication, and absolutely skewed sentiments and hurt feelings. Even after the bizarre and rocky road we've gone down filled with alcoholism and angst - I never lost trust.

Loyalty is a concept I feel strange to apply to humans - to me that's sort of an underpinning to love.

Topic 7 Formatting Errors That Make Your Book Look Unprofessional...
Posted 24 Jun 2014 09:47

I've read a lot of self-pub and haven't come across any headers or page numbers. I think people are mostly good on that.

Purging a self-pub of the block spacing between paragraphs can sometimes be a pain - some programs that format don't allow you to do this easily. I format in Sigil and then transfer to Calibre to fix up the paragraphs.

I have also used rag-right. I find that for the way I write - with some rather sizable words - using full justified makes my writing look putridly spaced apart like this and it drives me absolutely insane. If there was a way for there to be a blend of justified and rag then that would be great, but until e-readers are self-thinking and break down larger words by pre-programmed points, people like me will always have that issue.

At least that puts me in the boat with Nabokov!

Topic Submissive, Dominant or Your Partner's Sexual Equal?
Posted 23 Jun 2014 07:59

Hmm - personality doesn't really dictate bedroom behaviors that much. I think when people say 'dominant' in regard to sex they imagine all sorts of implements, black leather and whips.

But for me it's just him in charge - deciding what we do. And sometimes he just steps aside and lets me lead. But I never take over without him turning in that direction with things.

Topic What's the hardest thing about being in a relationship with you?
Posted 23 Jun 2014 07:51

Hmm - reading other people's posts makes me wonder if I'm being subconscious obtuse about myself.

I have a fear of men that I'm slowly growing out of - and by default I take caution when not needed with my husband. In regard to other men it seems more warranted until I know them (which doesn't happen - I don't have men in my life save for my husband and father) Even after all this time, I'm not quite past it. But hubbs knows it and he knows why.

So it might make sense that when I fell in love with someone he was a burly badass looking dude with scars and tattoos all over - When my husband and I are together in public people don't even so much a glance at me. When I go out alone I always feel people staring - and a lot of people have something to say. So he's like my bodyguard.

I also have a hard time accepting other people's psychological issues - that's a huge problem considering several people in my family have serious problems. Mainly, it results in me watching everything I say - no casual jokes or snide comments.

Topic Why Women Don't "Earn Less" Than Men...
Posted 23 Jun 2014 06:56

The argument presented is that " No - women don't really earn 77 (or some such) cent on the dollar" because ___, ___, ___, ___."

But all that says is " Yes - women really do earn 77 (or some such) cent on the dollar because ___, ___, ___, ___.

It doesn't mean that women DON'T - dollar for dollar - earn less. This is just showing you all the reasons why they do.

Some of these things relate to children and family decisions. Yet, many have grown children - many don't have children at all. Some never did make these choices - not a single time. Not every woman has these 'same issues'.

Because if we all did - we're all screwed.

Note: That for every mother - you have a father. And look at him: does he need to make these choices and sacrifices? Most of the time, not at all - because she is making them instead. Our society still leans very heavily toward Hard-Working Dad and Self-Sacrificing Mom. That's part of the problem.

For parents who have both made equal sacrifices for their children I wonder - in that niche group (not all women/men) - which one out of each gender pair gets paid less overall in their lifetime: Stay at Home Dads or Stay at Home Moms.

Some of these points from the above graphics are because women, on average, don't think or behave like men in the workplace. (they're making the claim that this is what it takes to make it in a 'man's working world')
No shit - we're women . Why do we need to think and behave like men in order to earn some equal treatment here and there when sometimes these differences shouldn't matter at all? It's a male-friendly work environment in most avenues of employment.

The problem lies where two people do the same work - same job - same outcome - and she earns less.
The problem lies where two people do the different levels of work - she's more successful - and same outcome or she earns less. Her success or abilities are overlooked or underpaid.
The problem lies where two parents have to make choices - and many women make the self-sacrificing choice because they feel compelled to regardless of true benefit.
The problem lies when someone works up endless graphs and charts to try to disprove a point - but they end up proving it instead. (lol)

We can use myself as an example - back when it didn't seem to matter, I made the choice to be a stay at home mom . . . and then the world shifted and now I'm still a stay at home mom. It would have been no big deal a while back for me to dive back into the workforce but everything's changed. I've been overlooked at every turn. Hence why I write to help cover the cost of my college textbooks. LOL

Topic Have you ever experienced sudden arousal due to unusual, or extreme circumstances?
Posted 23 Jun 2014 00:45

Sometimes my husband will say something - oh a whatever random thing - and his voice will do this little deep shudder. Mmm - gets me so worked up.

And the way his wristwatch jingle when he shakes if down his forearm. LOL - he did it three times in a row in a doctor's office and I had to grab his hand and tell him to quit. LOL

Topic A Memoir and Lush writers Resource
Posted 22 Jun 2014 22:16

Thank you, Rumple :)