I don’t want the car drive home to end. Every so often, he reaches over and brushes his thumb over my knuckles and when I look at him, he gives me a dazzling smile. It has been a mere half hour since we left after the most romantic evening I’ve ever had and I wish I have the money to afford another night at the hotel.

As we ride in the morning sun, I admire the coast by the road. The ocean is a deep blue, the cloudless sky paling in comparison. The waves overlap each other, even though there is a light breeze in the air.

“So, what have you got planned this weekend?” I ask, turning my gaze back to him.

“Well, after I drop you off, I have to go and pick up my nana from the airport."

“How long is she staying with you?"

“Only a week. Once she has taken a nap, how would you like to meet her over coffee and pie?” he smiles, never taking his eyes off the road.

“I would like that. When would that be?” I smile back, his joy is infectious.

“Later on today, it shouldn’t be too long,” he replies, catching my hand to softly kiss my knuckles before settling it on his leg.

We reach my house before I realise it. I look at it, wondering how it feels so long ago since my former BFF Ben showed his true colours by trying to force me to go to prom with him. I instinctively rub my arm, remembering the sharp pain of his fingers in my skin.

The door opening snaps me out of my trance. Shaking my head, I look up and see Mark’s outstretched hand.

“M’lady?” he offers, quirking up an eyebrow.

Giggling, I pick up my shoes and walk out of the car barefoot. My hair is a wild, curly mess and my dress is slightly wrinkled. There is no mistaking of what happened but I don’t care. We walk hand-in-hand to the porch, along the front garden. I revel in the textured feel of grass under my feet, grateful for the flat ground after walking in heels the previous evening.

Well, part of the previous evening, anyway. The thought of how Mark and I connected with each other with gentle caresses, kisses and ardent gazes makes my heart soar, a huge smile emerging across my face.

“I wonder what’s put a smile on your face,” he purrs into my ear, widening my grin.

“Well, you did say that you wanted to make me smile again,” I reply, turning around to face him when we reach my front door. I stand on the middle step while he stands on bottom step. The light catches his brown hair and his green eyes sparkle as he tilts his face to look at me. I can't believe such a hot guy has made love to me...several times.

“I did and I am so glad you are, because of me,” he murmurs, snaking his arms around my waist to bring me closer and rub my nose with his. I run my hands around his neck to press myself against him.

“Thank you. Last night was perfect,” I whisper, breathing in his unique musky smell. In his tuxedo pants and dishevelled dress shirt, untucked with sleeves rolled up his elbows, he looks insanely hot and it is taking all my inner strength not to pounce on him.

“It was perfect for me too, Beth,” he murmurs, taking advantage of the closeness to draw my lips into a tender kiss. Moaning, I surrender into his mouth and savour his taste. Our tongues slowly stroke each other, our lips lost in unhurried caresses. I feel his fingertips climb up my bare skin, drawing me into his spell and I willingly surrender myself to it.

When we eventually break, Mark pulls away slightly and I notice his eyes have darkened to an almost emerald green.

“Beth, I-“ he starts and as my heart begins to thump, my front door opens, causing us to look behind me.

“Hey you two! Did you have fun?” my older sister Sarah greets us and I am inwardly cursing her for ruining the moment.

“Yeah, we did. Ummm, I better go,” Mark quickly pulls away, letting me go and turns to head to his car. I can’t let him leave so suddenly, so I lift my skirt to go after him.

“Mark, wait,” I say, almost urging him to finish what he said but as I reach him, he turns to cup my face. He can see what I am silently asking him but he doesn’t say it. He only gives me an adoring smile that makes me shyly bite my lip.

“I will tell you later, I promise,” he whispers, pressing his lips to mine. With that, I nod and watch him get into his car and leave.

*****************

Five days later and I am packing for a short stay in Boston. I glance at my phone and I have to remind myself that I am single. There have been no texts or calls since that morning; Mark has inexplicably disappeared. I texted him the afternoon he left but I got a curt reply back:

'Sorry, can’t talk. Will text you soon.'

No kisses, no smiley faces, nothing affectionate.

Two days pass without a word. I try calling him but all I get is his voicemail. I couldn’t sleep that night. Too tired of debating of whether he was too busy to talk to me or he didn’t want to talk to me at all, I figured that he didn’t want things to continue. The following day, I decided to try and save what little dignity I had left and saved him the trouble:

'You don’t want to talk to me, fine. Don’t bother calling, because I won’t answer.'

The moment I sent that text, I half-thought that he would reply back. He didn’t and a part of me was glad. I don’t cry, I’m not even angry. All I feel is gratification; I wouldn’t be humiliated a second time. Besides, there is a special introduction day at the college I have been accepted into and I am determined to move onto the next chapter of my life with a fresh start.

With a deep breath, I continue packing.

*****************

The college is gorgeous and surrounded by beautiful buildings, an impressive library on my field of study, psychology, and the dorms aren’t too bad. I have been getting flyers for parties and get-togethers off-campus all day but all I want, after a long day of exploring, is to return to my hotel and have a bath.

After a leisurely soak in vanilla-scented water, I dress myself in a silk nightie and a fluffy gown. Looking through the little basket of free toiletries, I raise my eyebrows at the couple of condoms hidden under the shower gel and shampoo. Talk about being prepared.

I leave the bathroom before settling on the edge of the bed to flick through the film channel. My mother treated me a couple of nights in a nice hotel in the city so that I can find little coffee shops, obscure record stores and second-hand book shops in-between orientation sessions. Lucky for me, she knew me so well.

I am about to order some dinner when there is a knock on the door. Puzzled, I walk up to it and look through the peep hole. All I see is differentiating shades of white.

“Yes?” I ask, without opening the door.

“Miss Cheung, these have just been delivered for you.” Intrigued, I open the door to see a young porter holding a small bouquet of white roses.

“Thank you,” I smile, as he hands them to me. I take a moment to smell them. Oh, they are heavenly.

As I close the door and walk back into the room, I examine the bouquet. The flowers are lovely, a personal favourite of mine. Sarah knows I am a sucker for white roses, so they must be from her. Settling them on the dresser, I spot a card and open the small envelope.

'Beth, there are so many things I want to tell you. But you don’t deserve a text, email or call. You deserve to be told them…

I then see the ‘PTO’ in the corner. I turn the card around and my eyes widen.

'….in person.'

As the words float in front of my eyes, I hear a knock on the door that startles me, dropping the card on the floor. Without thinking, I hurriedly rush over to fling it open.

My eyes are wide in shock as Mark stands in front of me. But he doesn’t look carefree and relaxed like he normally does. Instead, he looks tired and worn-out. His eyes are slightly red, his skin is noticeably paler and there is a light stubble adorning his chin.

Part of me is elated that he is still alive and in front of me but another part of me is seriously pissed off. I imagine slapping him really hard around the face but then his eyes instantly meet mine and slightly brighten up, like he is thrilled to see me. But he doesn’t do or say anything and I am grateful.

He is waiting for me to make the first move.

“Hey,” I finally say.

“Hey, Beth,” he murmurs.

“You look awful,” I mutter.

“I feel it. It is so good to see you,” he says, a sad smile crossing his face.

“How…how did you find me?” I ask, leaning against the edge of the door.

“Before I tell you, I owe you an explanation. It is the least I can give you,” he says briskly, his hand fiddling on the shoulder strap of his rucksack.

“If you want me to leave, I have an open train ticket so you can throw me out when I am done.”

Sighing, I allow him to come in and watch him walk with an unfamiliar sense of unease. This is the guy who can make me blush with a smile but now, he can’t seem to look at me. I follow him back into the room and he takes off his rucksack, resting it on the navy blue carpet. I look at him, still standing, with my arms crossed.

Turning to face me, he rubs the side of his face and I realise he is exhausted.

“First of all, I want to apologise for not calling you.”

“It’s fine-" I start but he holds up his hand, stopping me.

“No, it’s not fine. It wasn’t cool of me to spend the night with you and then ditch you like that. I’m really sorry, Beth. I truly am,” he firmly says, making my eyes widen in shock at his determined tone.

I let out a deep breath, quietly satisfied at getting the apology I wanted to hear. But that isn’t all I want.

“I accept your apology. But please, tell me what happened,” I ask, my tone slightly harder than I had hoped. Removing his jacket, he hangs it on the back of the chair. He is wearing a dark shirt and lean jeans, emphasising his athletic body underneath. I slightly fidget, trying to hide what he is doing to me. I resort to leaning my side against the wall to act as casual as possible.

“Do you remember what I was planning to do that day after prom?”

“Yeah, you told me that you were going to pick up your nana from the airport,” I reply, crinkling my eyebrows.

“Well, my nana suffered a stroke on the plane. When I got there, she was being escorted out in a wheelchair into an ambulance.”

Straightening up, my heart stops and my mouth drops. My arms collapse to my sides.

“Oh my god, is she okay?” He freezes, allowing me to fully see his saddened expression.

“No. She…she died that evening. My parents were out of town so I had to wait for them to come back before I could do anything.”

Speechless, my eyes begin to well up. Never in a million years did I expect this.

“So when I texted you that night…?”

“I was in the hospital, waiting for more news on her condition. After I texted you back, the doctor told me that she passed away in her sleep.”

“Oh, Mark. I’m really sorry.”

“I so wanted to call you but I was so busy helping my parents organise the funeral and the wake. And…we had only started seeing each other and I thought piling all my grief on you was too much so I kept quiet. You then sent me the text saying you wouldn’t answer my calls and it crushed me.”

“I was angry, you didn’t give me any indication,” I murmur.

“I get it. But I was out of my depth. Out of everyone, you were the only person I wanted to talk about everything but then, you sent me that text and...I realised I fucked up," he sighs, sitting on the edge of the bed. Turning his gaze to me, his eyes are glassy and his face looks broken.

“Beth, I cannot apologise enough for making you think so negatively of me. Believe me, it was never my intention,” he murmurs.

Biting my lip to stop it trembling, I find myself walking towards him to stand in front of him in between his legs. He watches me bring him closer to rest his head against my belly. Almost immediately, he wraps his arms around me, embracing me tightly and begins to weep. I don’t complain; he needs to understand that I am here for him.

"If I had known, I would have been by your side. I am here for you, you do know that, right?” I quietly ask, trying to give him the comfort that he needs.

“I know that now. God, I’m so sorry, Beth," he murmurs against my robe.

“Sssh, it’s okay. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too,” I softly say, running my hands into his hair.

“No, I should have been honest with you but…it was awful, I didn’t know what to do,” he whispers, looking up to see my face. My heart breaks at the distress in his eyes.

“Why don’t I call for some food and we can talk about it?” I gently smile, lightly brushing my thumb over his cheekbones to sweep his tears off his smooth skin.

Nodding, he releases me and I reach for the phone.

***********************

We talk for hours over pizza and soda. He fondly reminisces about his nana and how he was looking forward to seeing her. He talks about how difficult it was to grieve for her when everything that happened revolved her passing.

As we eat and talk, I can see the colour begin to return to his face and his body becomes more relaxed, like the weight of his grandmother's passing has been lifted from his shoulders.

During dessert, he reveals that he stopped by my house the day after I left. He explained to Sarah what had happened and she told him where to find me.

“Did she recommend the flowers?” I ask, eating the last of the ice cream from my bowl.

“Yeah, she said that they were your favourite.

The card was my idea,” he admits, blushing.

“It was a nice idea,” I reply, smiling. He pauses and smiles for the first time tonight.

“I have missed seeing you smile,” he sighs, his hand brushing over my cheek to tuck a loose strand of hair. I trap his hand against my shoulder and playfully nuzzle it, causing him to chuckle.

“I have really missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” I murmur, placing my bowl on the trolley. Sitting opposite each other, a tense silence falls in the room. I am willing him to kiss me but I can see the hesitation in his eyes.

“So, would it be cool for me to stay?” he eventually asks, thankfully breaking the awkwardness.

“Of course. Besides, it is almost 1am, I think the trains out of Boston stop at 12.30pm. If you are free, we can spend the day looking round the city tomorrow.”

“Thank you, that sounds great,” he smiles.

In an attempt to distract myself, I hop off the bed to wheel the trolley outside.

“Do you want to take a shower or anything?” I ask as I move the cart to leave it by the wall outside.

“No, it’s okay, I’m just going to crash,” he replies, removing his socks and moving to lie down on the bed.

By the time I get back in and lock the door, Mark is dozing quietly on the bed. I decide to let him sleep and brush my teeth. Going into the bathroom and flicking on the light, I glance at myself in the mirror and am startled. My face is flushed pink, my eyes wide and I am feeling warmer than normal.

It hits me. I am aroused. My heart is racing and my palms are sweating by the thought of Mark on my hotel bed.

Releasing a quiet breath, I quickly brush my teeth and rinse my mouth out before spying the foil packets in the basket. Is it worth it? What if he doesn’t want me? But then again, he came here to find me. My heart ruling over my head, I pocket one of the condoms before returning to the bed.

I carefully climb on and lie down next to him. I look at Mark’s relaxed stance, one arm is resting over this head and another on his belly with a leg bent upright, his breathing is even and steady. Even in his earlier distressed state, he has never looked so hot.

Hesitantly, I reach out to stroke his stubble. A strange combination of rough and soft caress my fingertips and even as my palm glides along the side of his face, he doesn’t stir.

I boldly lean over to softly kiss his cheek. He murmurs in his sleep but when I pull back, I see his lips slightly parted but his eyes are still closed, his sleep continues uninterrupted. I then press my gentle kisses on his forehead and nose before brushing my lips on top of his.

His eyes slowly open as soon as he feels my lips. Our eyes meet, our pupils mutually dilated. I am frozen in his gaze, not wanting to go too far. But he gently strokes his fingers across my cheek, his touch burning a trail on my skin. As he moves to bury his hand into my hair, he slowly leans up towards me and my self-control goes straight out the window, causing me to press my mouth against his.

“Oh, fuck,” a low noise comes from his lips and before I know it, he rolls me over so I am pinned underneath him, trapping my mouth in an intense kiss.

Moaning, his lips coax mine apart and our tongue eagerly meet each other. I have missed his kisses so much, they never fail to give me butterflies inside and stir my deepest, most erotic thoughts and feelings.

Mark runs his hands up to cup my face, allowing him to tilt my face to deepen the kiss. My hands roam restlessly around him in return, gripping the material of his shirt while my legs separate to accommodate him.

“Beth, I have missed you so much,” he murmurs.

“I’ve missed you too,” I purr, gently biting his bottom lip. His moan sends shivers down my spine as he plunges his tongue inside, so I indulge in his kiss. Lusciously licking the edges of my mouth, he lowers his arms by my head so all of his body is pressing into mine. I can feel his growing erection against me and nothing stops me from subtly grinding my hips, coaxing him, letting him know that I want him.

“No, wait,” he murmurs, pulling away.

“What? Why?” I ask, confused. I suddenly hurt and rejected but his expression becomes sheepish.

“I…I don’t have any condoms,” he explains, feeling torn.

I sigh with relief. Quirking up an eyebrow, I pull out the packet out of my gown and hold it up in front of him with a seductive smile. His eyes widen and his expression changes to something more heated and toe-curling.

“Did you get that while I was sleeping?” he purrs, pushing against me, making no effort to hide his arousal from me. I gasp at how hard he is.

“No, came with the toiletries,” I whisper as I place the condom on the end table.

“Wow. We’re definitely staying here again,” he smiles, lowering his lips to mine. Running my fingers into his hair, I giggle against him and return his kisses with enthusiasm. They grow in passion and urgency, and I finally feel lost in him. Everything that has happened since the prom - the bitterness, anger and sadness of our assumed separation - fade in significance. He is now in my arms, loving me, cherishing me and I am here for him.

I begin to pull his shirt off but he abruptly breaks away, sitting up to pull it over his head and throw it on the floor. I sit up to untie my robe but before I can pull it off, Mark leans forward and recaptures my lips, groaning at the touch of them against his. Responding immediately, he enclasps me in his arms and pulls me up so we are kneeling on the bed, our mouths restlessly caressing.

His hands move to slip the gown off my shoulders and stroke my skin. Eager to touch him, I wrap my hands around his body as soon as they are free to bring him closer to me while never breaking our urgent kisses, our tongues entwined.

Responding immediately, his hands and arms snake around me. His kisses make me lose all sense of thought and the way he touches me makes me feel beautiful. With one hand cupping the nape of my neck, he holds me to his mouth while the other moves slowly down my back, gliding down the silk of my nightwear clinging to my body, eventually reaching the hem. His fingertips proceed to slowly bring up my nightie so he can caress my ass.

Sighing, I run my hands and lips across his body, revelling in his silky skin. I press sweet kisses on his chest as my fingertips skate down his toned stomach. Burying his nose in my hair, I hear his deep purr in my ear as he continues to pull up my nightie in a languid, unhurried pace. I begin to feel warm and damp, my ardent hands unbutton and unzip his jeans but before I could dip my fingers inside, my nightie reaches my armpits. Lifting my gaze to meet his, I raise my arms so he can remove it and see my naked body.

His eyes hungrily takes in my skin covered in goosebumps, my nipples tight and puckered, my breasts rising with each breath I take. I bravely leave myself uncovered with my hands resting on his hips. He needs to see what we does to me and from his darkened eyes and shallow breaths, he can feel it too.

“Beth,” he murmurs, reaching out to touch me but I stop him.

“Do you see what you do to me?” I breathe, making him lower his arms. I watch him nod while I hook my thumbs into his jeans and underwear to pull them down in one quick movement. His erection is unveiled and he releases a breath of relief from no longer being constrained by his tight boxers. His hands fisting tightly by his sides, he is already hard and my mouth is watering at the feeling of him inside me.

Biting my lip, I meet his eyes as my hand boldly reaches for him but I suddenly hear a sharp intake of breath.

“I want you,” he growls, moving to pull my legs from under me so I land on my back with an amused yelp. Before I can recover, he has already kicked off his underwear and jeans and with the condom in his hand, he practically pounces on top of me to reclaim my lips.

Writhing underneath him, my legs and arms immediately cage him, keeping him close to me. His lips suck mine, treasuring me and my taste while I revel in his amazing body and the warmth radiating from him. His hand moves up my body from my hip to squeeze my breast, rubbing his thumb against my erect nipple and I cannot stop the groan leaving me.

I feel his erection pressing into me, his hardness grinding against my dampness. His lips move down to kiss under my ear and jaw, teasing my senses with each touch. When his tongue glides over my throbbing pulse, my lust for him overcomes me and I want him inside me.

“Please, Mark. I want you too,” I moan, I can hear the pleading tone in my breathless voice.

“You have me, Beth,” he breathes, sitting up to unwrap the condom and roll it onto him. He repositions himself over me and grasping my hands by my head so his fingers are tangled with mine, he quickly and sharply thrusts into me.

We both groan loudly but I have little time to adjust to him. He begins to stroke me deeply, making my head roll back in pleasure. His pace is constant and I feel all of him inside me as he plunges in and out.

His moans are like music to my ears. Every time he withdraws and drives into me, the low noises from his throat are hoarse and raw with passion. His fingers tighten around mine while I feel his ardent kisses on my mouth and my neck before sucking hard on my nipple.

Whimpering from the brewing sensations within me, I bring my legs further up so they are wrapped around his torso. As I open up to him, his arms move underneath me and thrusts deeper inside me. I moan against his lips, my skin and hair now dampened with our sweat and my fingernails dig into the firm, tense muscles on his back.

“You make me forget everything,” he breathes by my swollen mouth, his hands brushing the hair out of my eyes to meet my heated gaze, while he brings me closer to a state of sweet abyss.

“You make me feel beautiful,” I whisper, burying a hand into his hair to hold him closer to me.

“That’s because you are, Beth,” he murmurs, cupping my face to fervently kiss me. Moaning, his kisses intensify as his thrusts quicken in pace and I feel him grow harder inside me. His tongue tickles mine and as I feel myself on the cliff edge of my heavenly release, Mark groans into my mouth and fiercely grasping my thigh, swallowing my gasp, his pace becomes shallower and vehement.

“Beth, come with me,” he begs, his eyes glued to mine, and with his seductive coaxing, I surrender to my physical sensations and my strong orgasm overpowers me. I feel myself shaking from coming so fiercely in Mark’s arms, unable to keep a hold of my own sanity. A loud moan escapes me, I vaguely hear my name being cried out in passion as he comes inside me. Wrapping his arms around me, his hips continue to grind against me as he rides out his intense orgasm and buries his face into my neck. Gripping around him, I hold him tightly as our bodies surrender to our feelings and unite in our release.

Panting heavily, I loosen my arms and legs as he collapses onto of me. Resting his face on my chest, his elbows tucked by my sides, I give into the quiet serenity of our emotional, sensual love-making. Brushing my fingertips down his spine, all I can do is stare up to the ceiling while listening to our breathing gradually slow down. I finally feel at ease with him, us…everything and the realisation relieves my nerves and thoughts. I try and relish his touch and feel of his body on top of mine, yet I cannot prevent my eyes fluttering in exhaustion. I slowly doze off with the touch of a deep kiss gracing my lips.

The next morning, I see the sunlight creeping through the slightly parted curtain and indulge in the full softness of the pillows. Lying on my front, my arm stretches to my side but I feel the vacant space next to me. Confused, I quickly turn and sit up. The sheets are crumpled and the bed is empty. All the breath leaves me in a rush as I panic. Has he left me?

I begin to feel crestfallen as I hear a door open. Startled, I quickly cover myself with a sheet but Mark comes in, his skin and hair freshly washed with a towel wrapped around his waist. My eyes widen at the sight of him. His figure maintained from vigorous football practice, his torso golden and glistening, his stomach toned with his damp abs glisten in the sunlight. I swallow loudly to lodge the lump in my throat.

“Oh god,” I breathe, half-relieved that he is still here and another half is rocked by the unassuming, half-naked god in front of me.

“Morning, beautiful,” he smiles, sauntering towards me and sits by me.

“Sorry if I started you. You looked really peaceful and I didn’t want to wake you. How long have you been up?"

“I’ve only just woken up,” I murmur, running a hand into my bedhead mess.

“Are you okay?” he asks, brushing his thumb against my bottom lip.

“Yeah, I can’t even remember falling asleep. How about you?” I reply, shifting to sit cross-legged in front of him. His eyes soften, his thumb moving to my cheekbone.

“I’m better, thank you," he replies, pausing to exhale with a sigh.

"God, I’ve missed looking at you,” he breathes, causing me to blush.

He slowly moves towards me but pauses until his mouth is millimetres away from mine. In turn, I lean forward to meet his lips, catching them in a soft kiss. Hearing a quiet groan, his hand cups my chin as I gently suck his bottom lip.

Breaking away slowly, I soon remember something.

“The morning you dropped me off, you wanted to tell me something. You never told me what you were going to say,” I murmur.

But he doesn’t tell me right away. Instead, he brings me into his arms, deeply kissing me as he lays me on the bed, teasing the bedsheet away from me...

As it turns out, I am the one who says it first.

I say it over and over as he makes love to me, taking me on the verge of orgasm and as we come powerfully together, he moans it into my ear with all the strength he can muster.

"I love you, Beth. I love you."