Thursday morning, as Gary and I prepared for school, neither of us spoke of the events of the night before.
I sensed a level of shame and regret from my older brother. I may have been projecting my own feelings, but it felt that Gary might be ashamed and embarrassed at what he had done to his younger sister.
I wanted to say something; I wanted to talk about what happened, but I simply did not know what to say. And it was clear Gary was not prepared to discuss the events of last night, so we pretended nothing had happened. I felt alone and isolated as Gary left the house without acknowledging our intimacy.
At school, I was constantly distracted by the irrational thought that the students and teachers could detect that I was no longer a virgin. I felt different. I felt womanly. My vagina had been christened and opened last night, my hymen had been ruptured. Not only did I feel different, I was different.
Would they sense the profound change in me? Of course not; nonetheless, I still felt like they might.
How would they react if they knew that it was my older brother who ‘popped my cherry’ last night? They would be horrified. Both Gary and I would be banished from all social interaction, labeled 'sick perverts'.
The knowledge that society and our friends would react the way that I knew they would if they knew, bothered me. What it really meant is that there was something significant about me now that I had to hide from even my closest friends and family members, or be rejected completely. I could not be myself ever again around even my closest friends.
I now had a deep, dark secret that needed to remain hidden forever. I doubt you can understand the emotional burden that placed on a young, previously innocent, 16 year old girl.
I also was acutely aware of my vagina and clitoris all day long. I remained slightly aroused as I sat in each of my classes, paying no attention to the lectures. The gusset of my panties felt perpetually damp, even wet as my mind kept revisiting my deflowering that had occurred only the night before.
I returned home at the usual time, and waited anxiously for Gary’s arrival. Mom would be out of town until Friday evening, so we were alone again on Thursday night. I wondered what tonight would entail. I was anxious and aroused wondering ‘What was in store for me tonight?’
Finally, Gary showed up, about an hour later than usual and said little. I was sitting in the family room. Gary entered through the front door but immediately he went upstairs, leaving me alone to my thoughts. He barely acknowledged my presence with a nod.
I felt hurt and angry. To me, last night was a profound awakening, a precious memory and a significant emotional event. It hurt me to think Gary wanted to pretend it did not happen.
I heard the shower running. I sat contemplating how to react; what to do. After a few minutes, I mustered my courage and went upstairs. I knocked on the bathroom door and then opened it.
“Gary, can I come in? We need to talk.” I said, trying to hide the nervousness in my voice. I feared being rejected at this moment.
I do not know if the readers can fully understand this, but it is monumentally big decision for a young girl to allow any boy to enter her and take her virginity. You really need to believe that the event is as important and precious to the boy as it is to you. It is a far greater emotional risk if the boy happens to be your brother, someone you have known since birth, and someone you will have to face every day. It is a very frightening and hurtful thought that the person you chose to take your virginity sees it as a casual, unimportant sexual release, and nothing more; especially if he happens to be your older brother.
My ego was very fragile at this moment as I entered the bathroom. I pulled myself onto the counter by the sink. The steam from the shower provided an eerie veil as Gary and I prepared to address ‘our situation’.
Gary stuck his head around the shower curtain, and seemed to be unsure of what to say. He simply stammered, “Ah, sure Liz. We can talk…..sure.”
“Gary, what’s going on? You are avoiding me and ignoring me? Are you mad at me?” I asked. I could hear my voice cracking slightly, indicating that I was on the verge of tears. I felt a huge lump forming in my throat. I did not want to cry in front of my brother at this moment.
“Oh god, no; I am not mad at you. I think I am mad at myself. I feel guilty about what we did; or more accurately, what I did to you. You’re my little sister. I am supposed to protect you, not fuck you.”
“Do you regret what we did?” I asked. God I hoped he did not regret this. I hoped he did not think it was a huge mistake, something he now wishes had not happened.
“I don’t know. Do you regret it?” Gary responded with an uncertain tone. His voice was shaky as well.
“I didn’t regret until you started avoiding me and ignoring me. Now I am not sure. If this changes everything between us, then it was a mistake. If you are uncomfortable being in the same room as me, it certainly was a mistake.” I responded honestly.
I paused to gather my thoughts before continuing. I concentrated on not losing whatever composure I had, not crying now. I needed to avoid that.
“Gary, last night, I felt good about this. Today I was a bit conflicted, but I still felt good about what happened. I felt what we shared last night was beautiful. But now you are treating me like a pariah. Now I feel dirty and ashamed. I am hurt and angry that you don’t even want to be in the same room as me now.” I could feel the tears starting to form in my eyes. I knew I was on the verge of crying, and I did not want that.
“Oh god, Liz, I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how you would feel; if you would be angry or filled with some deep regret.” Gary said with a level of genuine affection coupled with shame.
He continued to stand behind the shower curtain with the water continuing to spray against him as we talked. “I also did not know if you would ever want that to happen again. I just did not know how you would feel. And I did not know what to do, or even what to say. So I avoided you. I am sorry.”
I looked into my brother’s eyes and asked honestly, “Gary, would you want it to happen again? Or do you want it to stop right here and now?”
“God, Liz, I am so attracted to you right now. But I really don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to keep pushing you into something you don’t want; something you’ll regret. But I do want you.”
I felt a tremendous rush of affection for my big brother at that moment.
I smiled, “Gary, you did not ‘push’ me into anything last night. I wanted that as much as you did. I could have said ‘no’, but I didn’t. Someone was going to be my first; I am glad it was you. I am glad it was someone I love and who loves me. I am glad it was not some guy just trying to get another ‘notch on his belt’ so he could brag to his buddies.” I smiled before saying, “And I am pretty sure you won’t be bragging to your buddies about what we did, will you?”
I paused before continuing. “Gary, whether or not we ever do that again. I do not regret giving myself to you last night. That memory will always be precious to me.”
Gary hesitated before speaking, nervously he asked, “You said ‘whether or not we do that again’….do you want to continue our ‘relationship’?”
I slid off the counter where I had been sitting and walked towards him. I did not know how to respond. “Gary, I think that is up to you. If you want to stop, I will just cherish the memory of last night. But if you wanted to continue, I could not refuse you. I feel like you own part of me now. I am yours, if you want me. I am afraid that will always be true.”
Gary pulled back the shower curtain and stood naked in front of me. His penis was pulsing to life, growing hard in front of me. I stood a few feet away from him and watched as my older brother started to grow erect. Gary’s penis began growing longer and thicker. At first it simply hung down about 5 or 6 inches long. But it seemed alive as it throbbed thicker, longer and more firm as I watched.
Then it began rise its gorgeous mushroom shaped head. It seemed to be calling to me, communicating with me. With each pulse upwards, this beautiful deep pink, almost purple head sent a pulse towards my awakening vagina. This massive tool began to poke out from his abdomen, gradually sticking out horizontally, and slowly moving vertically.
This was a marvelous thing for this young girl to witness. It was one of the most beautiful and sensuous things I have ever seen in my life. I watched in amazement.
His beautiful cock seemed to pulse every 10 seconds or so, and with each pulse, he grew longer, thicker and his cock rose further upward, defying gravity. In about a minute or two, his erection was straining towards the ceiling.
God, he looked sexy. And this erection was a tribute to me! His cock was responding to me, without either Gary or me touching it; my mere presence caused him to grow fully erect.
Gary was 7 or 8 inches long and at least 2 inches thick. His cock had a distinct purplish hue to it. It was darker than the skin color on his tight abdomen. There was a large vein (which I now know is his urethra) that ran down the under side, which gave the erection a sinister and dangerous appearance that appealed to me. The large head seemed almost separate and distinct from the shaft. I will never forget the appearance of my first erect penis.
I was very flattered to have this effect on Gary. I felt sexy, beautiful and desirable. I was also aroused. And while my arousal might not have been completely obvious to Gary, there was no hiding his arousal. I loved that I could make my brother so hard, so aroused, just by my presence.
“Well Gary, it seems that your penis wants to continue our relationship.” I said in a flirtatious and teasing manner. “In answer to your question, yes, I do. I very much want to continue. I want to be yours. I want you to take me whenever you need to, whenever you want me.”
Gary nodded in agreement.
Looking at the intoxicating erection in front of me, I slowly began to undress. I unbuckled me pants and allowed them to drop to the floor. I stepped out of them and then picked them up. Looking over my shoulder at my brother, I neatly folded my pants, teasing him, standing in my panties and shirt.
I pulled my shirt over my head, and removed my bra. I stood there wearing only my pale blue cotton panties. I looked in my older brother’s eyes as I slowly hooked my thumbs into the waist band and very slowly I began to lower them. I lowered them a couple of inches exposing just a trace of my neatly trimmed pubic hair, but stopped just before I exposed my vagina. I looked into Gary’s eyes and I coyly asked, “Is it OK if I take these off?”
“Oh fuck, Liz, you are killing me here. Please take off your panties.” Gary pleaded, his erection bobbing up and down as he spoke.
I turned my back to him and removed my panties in as seductive a manner as I could; exposing round bottom before turning back towards him and exposing my vagina, which was now only covered by a thin veil of blond pubic hair.
Although the mirror was partially fogged over, I could see the silhouette of my naked form. I had to admit, I was developing a nice shape. My breasts, while small stood nicely atop a flat tummy. My bottom was firm and round atop my long legs. Yes, the changes in my body over the past year had begun to take shape. I was pleased with the results.
Momentarily, I looked at Gary. He was tall and muscular. His chest and shoulders and his muscular abdomen seemed to all force my eyes down towards his large erection which pulsed invitingly in front of him. His large rigid cock still looked too large to comfortably fit inside my tight little pussy; however, I knew from last night that with a little work and effort, I could stretch to accommodate him.
Yes, together we made a very attractive couple. The man to whom I was giving myself, who happened to be my brother, was a very attractive man.
I hoped I was as attractive to Gary as he was to me at that moment. From the way his boner throbbed up and down, it appeared that Gary did find me quite attractive.
“May I join you in the shower?” I asked coyly.
“Oh yes. Please do.” He said as he held the curtain open for me.
I stepped over the edge of the tub into the warm spray. My nipples were erect as the water struck my chest. I turned my back to Gary and let the spray massage my front. Gary placed his hands on my shoulders, gently massaging my shoulders and upper arms. Then, ever so slowly, Gary turned me to face him, placing my back to the warm stream of water.
We stared into each others eyes with an affection that is difficult to describe. Gary’s penis stood rigid and erect between us. Then he placed his fingers under my chin, and raised my head to kiss me. As his mouth approached mine, he stopped momentarily to say, “Liz, I love you so much. Thank you for being mine. Thank you for giving yourself to me.”
I met Gary’s kiss with open lips, inviting his tongue into my mouth. I sucked on his tongue as we necked, pressing our naked bodies together under the warm spray of the shower. I knew I was loved; and I knew I was his.
Gary took my tiny hand and placed it on his erection. I broke off our kiss to look at him.
Hesitantly, as I gazed into his eyes, I wrapped my fingers around his firm penis. I was still amazed at the thickness of this rigid pole; my fingers barely encircled the circumference.
This was only the second time I had touched his erect penis, and it continued to thrill me beyond belief. Once again, I was impressed not only by the length and girth, but by how heavy and rigid his cock felt with my tiny fingers wrapped around it.
I stroked down, moving my fist to the base of his shaft, pulling the taught skin of his cock even tighter as I studied how Gary’s penis responded to my touch. I noticed that as I pulled my fist down to the base, the tiny hole at the head of his cock opened up for me. This intrigued me.
I then stoked up the shaft slowly, and repeating the downward motion again. Again the hole at the tip opened. I was mesmerized by my new toy. I wanted to explore and experiment with it, and learn all about it. In fact, rather than a new toy, it was like I had a new pet to play with and get to know. I was little a little girl with a new puppy. We needed to get to know each other better. All I knew for certain is I really liked Gary’s penis.
Gary was arching his hips to the movement of my fist, humping forwards and back to accentuate the stimulation by my fist. Gradually, the pace began to quicken and Gary’s movements became more animated. I loved how aroused he was becoming. I loved knowing I was the cause of it.
There in the shower, with the water washing over both of us, I pumped his rigid cock. He leaned over and kissed me again. Gary’s kiss had a combination of love and passion that has never been surpassed. Our tongues played tag, chasing each other from one mouth to the other, and then back again. I felt an outpouring of love and affection for my brother at that moment that was as strong and as real as anything I have ever experienced.
Gary brought his hand up and fondled my breasts, teasing the taught nipples. I moaned into his mouth as I gently sucked his tongue into my mouth. As I continued to pump his cock, Gary slowly reached down with his fingers to explore my wet and erect clitoris.
I separated my legs ever so slightly to allow him access to my vagina. He gently opened the tight folds of my vulva and inserted one finger into my tight vaginal opening. Last night, Gary had been the first person to explore my womanhood, the first person to ‘finger me’. And now the second time he penetrated me with his fingers was just as sexy and pleasurable as the first.
I was aroused in anticipation of the pleasure Gary could give me. He rotated his finger at my vulva, massaging the opening to my vagina. I could feel my vagina opening up to accept his touch. I bowed my legs, squatting slightly to allow him greater access to my vagina.
I remember thinking at that moment that much of the sexual discovery I was experiencing happens to most girls with their boyfriends in the parked car, or the basement of their home. But something about making these discoveries with someone you have known since birth, with whom you have shared almost every experience of your life, and someone who you love in many ways, and on many levels, made these discoveries seem even more intimate, and more beautiful. I also realized that the shame and the guilt that would follow are a significant price to pay for this intimacy.
Gary broke our kiss, and withdrew his finger from my vagina and looked at me lovingly. Slowly, he reached his hands up, placed them on my shoulders, pressing down firmly but gently. I quickly understood what he was trying to do; he was trying to move me into a kneeling position; and despite my lack of experience, I understood why he wanted me to kneel in front of him.
I should have anticipated that Gary would expect this; but as naive as I was, I was momentarily caught by surprise.
I also knew that women are expected to do this for their men. I knew that if I was going to truly belong to my brother, if I was going to give myself to him totally, I needed to be prepared to do this for him. It may sound silly to you, but this was a big emotional step for a 16 year old girl. But I knew I wanted to do whatever Gary needed.
After brief moment of hesitation, I allowed him to guide me to the kneeling position in front of his rigid cock. And I knew that by allowing him to ‘guide me to kneeling’, I was agreeing to take him in my mouth.
With the shower hitting the back of my head and shoulders, I studied Gary’s erection inches from my face. I was still intrigued by the purple tinted, mushroom shaped head that appeared to me separate and apart from the shaft.
The ridge that separated the head from the shaft fascinated me. The thick vein clearly visible down the 7 or 8 inch shaft gave the erection a harsher, more rugged appearance; making the penis appear almost ‘muscular’.
With his penis standing straight up, the underside was plainly visible as well; revealing the thick urethra running down the middle of the underside of the shaft. This male tool was strangely beautiful to me. It represented a unique combination of strength, eroticism, and pleasure. I realize now that Gary’s penis had a strange magnetic appeal to me, and it touched me at a very core level.
I like the male penis; and it gives me great pleasure to stimulate it and please it. I believe the female body is more aesthetically beautiful, with its parts tucked away neatly inside. But the male body screams strength, power and eroticism to me. This arouses me and pleases me.
I like the thought that the male member takes the female; capturing and penetrating her, holding her in place until she accepts his seed inside her. Yes, the power that the male penis represents appeals to me even to today. And at that moment, in the shower with my brother, I was learning that I liked submitting to that power. I liked being taken. And while being taken in my mouth for the first time was frightening and overwhelming, it also had a strange appeal. I was learning that submitting to the male member was very appealing to me.
So kneeling in front of Gary in the shower, I leaned forward and kissed the head gently, without opening my mouth. I was not sure how to proceed. I was intimidated by this massive tool. I continued to stimulate the shaft with my fist while I contemplated what I wanted to do.
I leaned forward and kissed the head again, this time a bit more passionately, parting my lips ever so slightly and allowing my tongue to contact the head. As my tongue gently swept across the tiny opening at the tip, I detected a taste with which I was not familiar. It was barely detectable and not unpleasant, but slightly bitter. I now know I was detecting the trace amounts of pre-orgasm ejaculate that some men seep out of their penis before they shoot.
I kissed down the underside of the shaft as I gently held his testicles in my free hand, before returning to the head. But I was still hesitant to place this huge cock into my mouth. I was unsure if I could comfortably fit his girth inside me mouth.
I wanted to do this for my brother. Gary placed his hands on the sides of my head and gently guided my head towards his rigid pole. I reached up and removed Gary’s hands from the sides of my head. I needed to feel like I was controlling what I did and how much of him I took at a time. I did not like feeling like my head was being forced forward, or that his penis would be ‘forced’ into my mouth. If I was going to do this, I was going to do it willingly and at my own pace.
With Gary’s hands now at his side, I slowly relented; I slowly opened my mouth to allow the head to slip past my lips. Gary moaned loudly as his penis penetrated my lips into my mouth. The shaft was thick enough that I felt like I was having to stretch my mouth and jaw open to allow the head to past by my lips. Initially, it was uncomfortable, but my mouth and jaw seemed to adjust to the intrusion rather quickly.
He was large, and the texture of the skin was incredibly smooth. I began licking and sucking; I started moving my mouth up and down, taking only 2 to 3 inches of him into my mouth. I could feel his hips rock upward to meet my movements, trying to push deeper in my mouth. I resisted trying to take him deeper in my throat; I feared that I would gag if I tried to take him any deeper. I preferred to stimulate the head using my lips and tongue.
I did not want to take much more than the head into my mouth. And to this day, when I ‘give head’, even to my husband, I make love to the head of the penis, but have never tried to ‘deep throat’ anyone. I will make love to the penis, but I do not like the thought of someone shoving their dick down my throat and making me gag. That is not sexy to me.
After only a few minutes of stimulating the head of Gary’s penis with my lips and tongue, Gary’s breathing began to quicken. I knew instinctively that his arousal was increasing and he was approaching his climax. It was approaching decision time for me; my initial thought was to stop sucking now and complete the job “manually”?
My initial reaction was to pull away rather than allow him to cum in my mouth. But something kept me from disengaging my mouth; something kept me from pulling away. I was conflicted. In general, thought of a man’s sperm in my mouth was not at all appealing; however, the specific thought of tasting and ingesting my brother’s most intimate nectar was, well, very intimate. I mean, this was still my brother, the person whom I was closer to than anyone else on the planet, the person who had deflowered me last night, and the person to whom I wanted to give myself to in every way.
At that particular moment, as I wrestled with my emotions and conflicting feelings, the thought of pulling away from his semen seemed far worse that ingesting it. So I continued to stimulate the head of Gary’s cock with my lips and tongue while pumping the shaft, knowing that at any second he might ejaculate into my mouth.
Still, I was a bit surprised as I felt the pulse of his penis and felt the sudden rush of semen appear in my mouth. I did not actually feel the semen shoot, but a large dollop of semen suddenly overwhelmed my tongue and mouth. In this concentrated volume, the taste was much stronger than the faint taste of his pre-cum seepage that I had tasted a hint of when licking the head of Gary’s penis earlier. The salty, slightly bitter taste was not really unpleasant, but it was just slightly overwhelming.
I held the first string of semen in my mouth as I worked to muster the courage to swallow it. Momentarily, I was tempted to retreat and spit out the viscous rope of semen in my mouth; however in order to spit it out, I would have to ‘disengage’ from Gary’s erupting member in the middle of his orgasm; and I did not want to do that.
In the instance during which I was deciding what to do with the semen in my mouth from the first string that shot from his penis, the second string erupted in my mouth, and I was forced to choose. I swallowed both spurts together. It was an intense, memorable moment. I had now ingested the most intimate essence of a man, his sperm; and it was my brother's sperm at that.
(Masturbation break – I am so turned on as I recall that night; I simply had to have a climax. It was wonderfully intense. I used my favorite toy (an 8” bright red phallic shaped vibrator), and as aroused as I was, it slipped right in without any lubrication needed. I am back now, a little more relaxed, but still very dilated, wet and aroused.)
Rather than been repulsed, the knowledge of what I had just done aroused me. Gary’s semen was inside me now. And it was safely in my tummy where it could not create any havoc trying to impregnate me; but still it was within my core. I liked that thought. The taste of his semen was not at all offensive; in fact, I found he experience pleasant and exciting.
After he finished spurting his ropes of semen in my mouth, I kissed his penis several times before standing up. As I stood, another very small trace amount of white semen appeared on the tip of his penis. I leaned forward and with the tip of my tongue, I licked the last remnants of semen from the head of Gary’s penis.
I had just performed an incredibly intimate act. And while I admit that I felt a little ‘slutty’ at the moment having just swallowed his semen, I also felt incredibly close to Gary.
Gary reached over, placed his fingers under my chin and raised my gaze to his, and said, “Liz, that was beautiful. Thank you. I love you so much.”
And then Gary kissed me on the cheek.
I realized immediately that Gary avoided kissing me on the lips after cumming in my mouth. He obviously did not want to encounter his own semen. I found this amusing. Over the years, I have found that no man likes to kiss me after cumming in my mouth; their semen is fine for me to ingest, but they do not want to encounter it themselves. Men are peculiar creatures indeed.
We hugged and caressed each other before exiting the shower, and dried each other off.
Gary remained firm and large, but was not as rigid as he was immediately before he came.
While drying me off, Gary began touching my clitoris, first with the towel. He quickly dropped the towel and began touching me with just his fingers. I was already highly aroused, having just given my first blow job. I began rocking my hips. I wanted to climax, I needed my own release.
“Gary, you are turning me on so much. I want you so bad. Can you get another condom tonight?”
“I want to take you inside me again tonight. Would you make love to me tonight? I want you to fuck me…if you want to that is….I want you inside me so badly….will you fuck me again?”
I could see Gary’s penis start to grow firmer again as I spoke. Gary liked hearing me beg to be fucked…..and he seemed very willing to do just that. He seemed ready to fuck his little sister.
Coming soon…..Chapter 4: Gary wants to taste me…..
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with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.
<a href="http://www.lushstories.com/stories/incest/chapter-3-discoveries-with-my-brother.aspx">Chapter 3 - Discoveries with my brother - what's next?</a>