My mind was reeling, my heart was racing and I had the most painful case of morning wood going on downstairs. I sat up, slightly disoriented, my eyes slowly adjusting to the blinding light that had flooded around me. I was dreaming about her, again
. After leaving Aria’s bedroom last night, I ventured downstairs and barricaded myself in my study, crashing on the most uncomfortable leather sofa in our entire house, and yeah, it just so happened to be in my home office.
Vanessa purchased this atrocious piece of furniture, completely disregarding the comfort factor that I had expressed I needed. Women…
always placing luxury over comfort, just like when they walk in a pair of killer six inch heels for eight hours straight; the shoes will have completely murdered their feet by the end of the day, but apparently it’s worth all the pain despite the extreme discomfort. It was moments like this that I truly appreciated identifying as an average heterosexual male.
I felt weird today, like I was out of my body looking in or something. Everything that happened last night felt like a dream, but my reality begged to differ. Dr. Grey’s advice completely went out the window the moment I surrendered and returned Aria’s affections. To be honest, I was panicking pretty badly when she told me she wanted to move back to New York. Kissing her on that ride was unexpected and impulsive. Nothing would’ve been able to prepare me for the feelings that would come right afterwards. No matter how much therapy I would’ve gotten. I’m sure it all would’ve been forgotten once I caved and kissed her.
I felt like a recovering drug addict who was regretfully relapsing. Aria was the most dangerous drug I had ever experimented with, and I should’ve known better than to rekindle my love affair with heroin and crack cocaine, because that’s what it felt like to kiss her. It was as if her lips were injecting this hallucinogen, psycho active drug right into my blood stream, making me feel this instant rush of euphoria and sending me on an amazing high that I didn’t want to come down from. I felt so fucking guilty. I’ve kissed many women, and no one has ever made me feel the way she
made me feel that night. It fucking blew my mind away. What the fuck did you do, Noah? You cheated on your wife last night, you broke the law, you committed an unforgivable sin, and you don’t even plan to stop!
My conscience shook its head at me in disappointment, as I proceeded to argue my case like I was at some mock trial. I did
plan to stop it. In fact, I did stop things from escalating to the point of no return. I know Aria and I got really physical with one another, but I only blamed myself. I should’ve stayed away. Honestly, I was just planning to walk into the kitchen, grab a glass of water and go back into my study to sleep. But for some reason my feet automatically led me down the hall, straight to her bedroom instead, and I just couldn’t turn around. My mind was screaming no,
but my body won the battle.
I had no idea what I was going to do at this point. Maybe it wasn’t too late to repent.
I was sure Dr. Grey would have a few choice words for me when I’d visit him on Thursday. How did my life get so fucking complicated? Maybe this was my punishment for not being in Aria’s life when she was younger; I sexually imprinted on my daughter and was suffering eternal torture because I wasn’t able to stop these feelings, or make these fantasies go away.
It killed me to see her cry while we were on that Ferris wheel last night. But I admired her bravery to place herself in such a vulnerable position the way she did. I never would’ve been able to express my feelings for her so honestly. I really couldn’t handle breaking her heart. I’ve broken many hearts since I can remember, and no one, not even my wife had been able to control me and influence my emotions the way Aria did. I was trying really hard to stay rational and in control, but I couldn’t live with the fact that I was shattering her to pieces. The fear of losing her was the worst kind of reality I never wanted to experience. So much that I decided to jeopardize my marriage, my morals, and my role as a father in her life.
I told Dr. Grey in confidence that I would never touch Aria, and last night I almost had sex with her because I lost control. This wasn’t right. I was destroying her and me. If we continued carrying on this way, it was seriously going to screw us up and hurt a lot of people in the long run. There had to be a way to convince her to get counselling with me. I couldn’t give up hope. She seemed to understand the whole deal with GSA.
I guess Aria did her research way before I even knew about it. How could I stick to my guns without losing her? She made it very clear that she couldn’t love me the way a daughter does, and I clearly failed at rejecting her. What did that even mean? Was I in love with her too? Was it just attraction I was feeling?
I didn’t want to think. I wanted to turn off the thoughts in my head, get high and just…tune out the world. Okay, I knew I couldn’t
get high, but maybe I should’ve taken up smoking again. I needed to find some sort of new addiction before I became addicted to her. This wasn’t healthy. It was dangerous.oOo
No one was awake yet as I made my way upstairs. It was still early and I noticed that my wife was still asleep when I walked into our bedroom. I did
have the option to go back to bed, or I could’ve showered and gotten out of the house for a bit to clear my head. I was mentally considering all the alternatives on how to spend my day, when I suddenly remembered that Aria’s friend Ryan was coming over. I could already say that I didn’t like the guy. There was just something about him that rubbed me the wrong way. I didn’t trust him for a second to be alone with my daughter. I didn’t trust any guy being alone with her. At this point I didn’t even trust myself.
It felt nice to stand under the hot water for some minutes, while the steam surrounded me like fog. My back was still sore from sleeping on that pathetic excuse for a sofa, but I’d live. I closed my eyes under the shower and just listened to the sound of pressurized water hitting the marble tiles beneath my feet. ‘I’m so going to hell for this, Aria.’ ‘I’ll be right there with you.’
Her voice echoed in my ears as the vivid memory of my body sinking into hers materialized before me. I had a raging hard on again, just by thinking about her for a split second. Great.
How the hell was I going to function today? I knew I’d just be hornier if I didn’t take care of the problem
right there and then. I really needed to just jerk off and get it over with as soon as possible, but I resisted temptation and tried to cleanse my thoughts of the graphic images that were assaulting me. Aria’s lips, her body against mine, the heat I felt in between her thighs when I was on top of her…it was all so stimulating. ‘Don’t you want to know what it’s like to be the first person to penetrate your daughter’s tight, wet cunt with that big, throbbing cock of yours?’
Oh fuck, it sounded so wrong when she said that to me, but it was so fucking sexy to hear her talk so dirty at the same time.
I turned my body around so that I was facing the tile covered wall, and rested both my palms against the surface while the water poured over my head and body. I was fighting the urge to relieve myself, but it just wouldn’t go down. Now as probably a good time to twist the shower knob straight to cold. So I did just that, feeling the steam evaporate around me as the cool water neutralized my heated body.
I should really encourage Aria to start a blossoming relationship with that Ryan kid. Maybe I was too overprotective of her and being too judgmental too fast. I mean, I remember what it was like to be sixteen. Hell, I got Emily pregnant at that age, so I couldn’t pretend to be a saint. I had a wife, and I promised Vanessa that we would work through our marriage. She wanted to have a baby soon, and being with my daughter…was just impossible. Last night felt like a really crazy acid trip.
My erection slowly went down as I turned up the heat once more and I was about to finish washing up when suddenly I felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around my waist.
“Mind if I join you?
Vanessa kissed my back and reached down lower, wrapping her fingers around my cock. Fuck. Not good.
I mean, it felt great to have her jerk me off, but just the fact that I wasn’t thinking about my wife while she was pleasuring me as a huge no no.
And I felt so guilty deep down.
“You don’t have to honey.” I grabbed her wrist and tried to stop her
“But I want
to. Turn around.” She whispered seductively in my ear and then forced my body to twist in her direction. But before I could stop her, she already crouched down on her knees, and started to suck me off nice and slow, making my cock stand at full attention. Aria’s face flickered in front of me as I closed my eyes and tangled my hands through Vanessa’s hair.
—” I groaned in pleasure, breathing hard and uneven. If there was one thing my wife was really good at, it was giving head. She took all nine inches down her throat, licking my shaft and balls before her mouth engulfed my cock again.
I remembered the sensation of my daughter’s soft, sensuous lips pressing against mine, the smell of her strawberry vanilla shampoo, the sweltering heat in between her thighs. It stimulated me more than the blow job my wife was giving me at the moment. I pulled Vanessa’s head down hard, getting more aggressive in my thrusts, while I totally impaled her mouth with my shaft. She was choking and gagging, and it was too late to stop.
“Shit! Open your mouth for me.” She obeyed, waiting for me to release my load right down her throat.
“Fuck, here it comes!” I kept my eyes shut, imagining Aria on her knees, waiting for me to shoot my seed into her mouth. That’s when my body started convulsing. “Oh fuck… Aria.”
I said her name under my breath by accident, and as soon as I said it, I was overcome with panic.
“What did you just say?”
Vanessa’s voice broke the state of ecstasy I was under as I opened my eyes and watched her rise to her feet. I immediately felt like crap and was worried that she heard me say Aria’s name. Busted.
“I said—” I pushed my wife gently against the wall and slid my hand in between her thighs. “Are ya ready?” Nice save.
She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and bit her bottom lip. “Always ready for you Mr. Hunter,” and then she kissed me while I reluctantly glided my fingers deep inside her cunt.
I felt so fucking horrible. I just wanted to take a shower by myself, and at the same time I knew I had no right to get angry at Vanessa. She was my wife. She just wanted to make me feel good. Yet, I couldn’t help but feel this overwhelming sense of betrayal to Aria. Well…technically you’re not fucking the wife at the moment.
Shadow Noah whispered in my ear. What Aria doesn’t know, won’t hurt her.
My mind was a mess, but I hid that from my wife and fucked her so fast and hard with all three fingers slipping in and out of her cunt. I literally made her cum in less than two minutes.ARIA
I woke up this morning with a huge smile on my face. Last night was a dream come true. I had butterflies in my stomach all while I was showering and getting dressed. I didn’t know what everyone was doing today, but I knew that Noah would be home.
My closet was thoroughly raided as I kept throwing outfit after outfit on my bed. I just didn’t know what to wear and I wanted to look perfect.
After numerous wardrobe attempts, I decided to wear a white bikini and a pair of ripped denim shorts. The weather was really nice and I figured I’d take a dip in the pool later in the afternoon. Besides, I had plenty of time to kill before Ryan would come over for dinner.
I slapped on some gloss and mascara then quickly tied my hair back into a high bun. The delicious aroma of bacon and eggs had wafted down the hallway as I made my way to the kitchen for some breakfast. Vienna was already up. Unlike my step mom, she looked completely frumpy that morning, but didn’t seem to care in the least how she looked.
“Good morning, Aria.”
“Morning.” I smiled and walked past her so that I could grab the box of cheerios in the pantry.
“Slept well?” Yes, I slept pretty damn good,
I thought with a subtle smirk. “Yeah, what about you?”
good. I don’t know how I’m going to sleep at three star motels and hostels when I’ve experienced five star accommodations here at my sister’s place.”
I laughed dryly and sat on a stool by the marble island in our kitchen. Vienna was definitely more down to earth than Vanessa. Manicures, pedicures, fake tans and Botox weren’t really her thing.
I swallowed a spoonful of my cereal when suddenly my heart fluttered in quick palpitations when he
walked in. Oh god, the smell of his cologne and body wash just seemed to follow him everywhere he went. It always left me feeling completely intoxicated with this stupid smile on my face, because that was all part of the Noah
effect; you just forget all rational thought and find yourself hypnotized by his alluring presence.
“Good morning ladies.”
“Hey Noah,” Vienna poked her head out from the fridge and handed him a jug of orange juice. “Hold that for me will you?”
He flashed a dimpled smile at me and I almost fainted. He just wasn’t human. How could he be? He was too perfect to be categorized under the unfortunately flawed human race. It’s no wonder he left every woman swooning over him. I’m sure he was a certified Casanova
before he settled down with Botox Barbie. In some ways I was curious to know exactly how many women Noah had slept with throughout his life, but at the same time I was afraid the horrifying truth would really make me jealous and angry. Some things were just better left unknown.
“Are you raiding my fridge?” he chuckled lightly.
“I’m trying to look for the mango juice.” She continued to rummage through the refrigerator while I just stared at my dad.
“Sorry Vienna, I drank the last carton of mango juice yesterday.” My step mom appeared out of nowhere, and slid her arms around Noah’s waist.
“So much for making the perfect breakfast, thanks Nessa.”
She grabbed the jug of Tropicana
away from his hands and placed it back in the fridge before shutting it with a sigh.
I watched my stepmom like a hawk as she hugged Noah’s body and nibbled on his ear lobe. She was whispering things to him, and I couldn’t quite make it out because of that damn ruckus Vienna was making with the pots and pans. But my blood was immediately boiling when I heard her say;
“That shower was fantastic, wish we could start every morning like that.
” And then she kissed his neck and grabbed his ass.
I was gripping my spoon so hard that my fingers were going numb. What the hell did they do in the shower!? Noah promised he wouldn’t sleep with her…
well technically he said he wouldn’t last night
, but still! I felt so crushed.
“Whoa, easy now.” He unraveled himself from her deadly spider web. Yes, that’s what Vanessa was like; a disgusting, dangerous black widow spider that needed to be squashed! Her obnoxious giggling wouldn’t cease, as she wrapped those skinny little spider legs around his waist once more and pulled him into a deadly widow’s kiss. I tried not to watch and stared down at my soggy cereal. Well, that was a waste. My cheeks felt hot and I wanted to cry, but somehow I managed to reinforce the walls that Noah had infiltrated last night while I stood up and carried my bowl to the sink, not giving so much as a glance to the blissfully married couple.
“Good morning, Aria.” My stepmom said in her usual over enthusiastic voice.
“Morning.” Okay, that sounded flat and cold.
I didn’t look at her or Noah, but I could feel his eyes on me. In fact, I remained very indifferent towards the two of them while I washed my bowl and set it in the dish rack.
“Do you feel any better today?” she asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
I plastered on the fakest smile ever and soaked my voice in sarcasm. Knowing Vanessa, she was too dumb to even catch on.
“Glad to hear, honey.”
I hated it when she called me honey. I hated it when anyone
called me that or hun,
and he knew this, which was why he did well to refrain from using those terms of endearment towards me.
I met his ice blue eyes for a brief second, and then quickly looked away because I was too afraid to even try to decipher the expression on his face. We were always good at silently communicating with one another, but I didn’t want to let him into my head. Not after discovering his little shower sexcapade
with that bitch.
“You hardly touched your breakfast.” Vienna said, as she stood next to me.
“Lost my appetite—” I shrugged casually and was about to walk out of the kitchen and lock myself up in my bedroom, when my stepmom stopped me; asking a stupid question.
“Hey Aria, is Ryan still coming over tonight?”
It was stupid because she already knew the answer to that.
“Well, I just thought I should let you all know that I have invited a few more friends over for dinner. You don’t mind that do you? I can always cancel if you’re not comfortable with it. I just thought having a little more company over would be fun; and also that way Ryan won’t feel like he’s being scrutinized under a microscope by all of us.” Oh, well how thoughtful of her.
I shook my head. “No, it’s fine. I don’t mind.”
“When exactly did you make this decision?” Noah asked her.
“I called Teddy and Lana, and also invited your buddy Lewis and his family. Is that alright honey?”
He looked a little apprehensive. “Yeah, that’s fine.”
I didn’t stick around to listen to the rest of their boring conversation. So I marched into my room, grabbed a couple magazines and then walked out onto the patio of our backyard. It was certainly a perfect day to catch up on a cinnamon tan. How could he sleep with her after what we shared last night? How could he!?
I just couldn’t understand, and then it all made sense to me. Noah never told me he was in love with me. Maybe all he felt was attraction and nothing more. Maybe my silicone stepmom had me beat in the love department. As depressing as it was, I promised myself that I wouldn’t allow him to get to me. I would only have to survive this night and then I’d escape back to New York, without anyone knowing. I’d have to get over him, somehow.
I reclined on a comfortable lounger, and opened up an issue of 17 Magazine,
when I noticed someone sit down across from. I didn’t even need to look up. I knew who it was.
“Aria, I need to talk to you.”
I put my sunglasses on and avoided his eyes, while I flipped from page to page. “There’s nothing to talk about, Noah.” We kept our voices down.
“Listen to me, what you heard earlier is not—”
“I don’t care,” I interrupted him before he could finish. “I honestly don’t care. She’s your wife, right?” I watched his puzzled expression through the tinted shield of my sun glasses. “Let’s just put last night behind us, okay? Nothing happened.” There was a huge lump at the back of my throat, but I swore I wouldn’t shed a single tear anymore. I was so tired of crying in front of him.
He was silent for a moment, parting his mouth to say something. But nothing came out. Perhaps this was what he wanted all along, to forget.
Well, I sure as hell wasn’t going to tell him about my plans.
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” I made a pathetic attempt at a smile and then stared down at my magazine again. It wasn’t like I was actually
reading it. None of the words were registering in my head anyway, but Noah didn’t know that of course. I’m sure from his perspective it looked like I was completely disinterested in everything he had to say.
“Then why are you being so distant?”
“I’m not being distant. I’m being realistic,” I stood up and unzipped my shorts in front of him, shaking them off until they dropped to my feet. His eyes cascaded down my body as I took off my sunglasses and carefully tossed them on the lounge chair. “You have a wife. Besides, last night wasn’t supposed to happen, right?”
But I didn’t stick around to hear what he had to say. Instead I just turned my heel and dove into the pool. It felt good to be submerged under the cool water as I swam to the other end, praying that he would be gone by the time I resurfaced. And surely enough, the mysterious God that had graced me with his unexpected visit had vanished by the time I emerged out of the water; leaving only traces of his intoxicating cologne as evidence that he was there to begin with.oOo
I managed to avoid Noah all afternoon. In fact, I think we were both
avoiding each other. Well anyway, I spent most of my time out of the house, hanging out with some of my girlfriends at the mall. It was almost five o’clock when I came home and noticed that Vanessa had gone all out with the dinner preparations. She had hired a chef last minute to cook for us, and of course she would. She couldn’t cook to save her life.
“Aria, are you home hun?”
I rolled my eyes and dragged my feet from the foyer to the kitchen.
“Great, do you have any semi-formal dresses? You know, like a mini cocktail dress?”
“I thought this was supposed to be a casual little shin-dig sort of thing…”
“Well, I just thought it would be fun if we dressed up a little! Don’t you love getting all dolled up? I’m sure you want to impress Ryan a bit.” She winked at me and I wanted to gag.
“Yeah, I have some dresses.”
“Perfect! Just text Ryan and make sure he knows the dress code.”
God, how embarrassing. This was supposed to be a simple dinner, not lining up in front of the Hunter Residence
waiting for Barbie bouncer Vanessa to enforce a dress code before we could get in. I sighed and quickly sent Ryan a text.oOo
After several different dress fittings, my step mom finally approved of my evening attire when I tried on this tiny black cocktail dress. I wore my hair down and matched the ensemble with a pair of sexy black pumps. Vanessa looked ridiculously slutty in her leopard print mini dress. It was so damn tight that her boobs were almost popping out, but I didn’t say anything.
A total of eight guests had arrived for dinner that evening. Lana and Teddy Deveraux were Vanessa’s friends and I had met Lewis Crawford before, (my dad’s co-worker), but I hadn’t met his wife Chelsea. They had fraternal twins who were my age; Max and Melanie. My stepmom had also invited her fitness trainer Brendan. Probably because he was single and she wanted to play match maker for Vienna. Anyway, Ryan was the first to arrive on time. Everyone else sort of rushed in shortly afterwards.
He looked really good that night. I must admit. I’m pretty sure Melanie was crushing on him since she was being a bit flirtatious with him all through the evening. I didn’t really mind thought. It wasn’t Ryan I felt territorial over; it was Noah
Whoever that chef was, really knew his culinary skills. He cooked up this amazing Greek lamb with parmesan roasted potatoes and olives. Dinner conversation wasn’t all that interesting. Noah attempted to grill Ryan and put him on the spot on more than one occasion. But Vanessa typically intervened shortly afterwards, turning the focus on the other dining guests instead. Apparently Lana and Teddy were having their first born on the way and this sparked Vanessa’s maternal instincts. God, she wouldn’t shut up about how many times she and Noah have been trying to get pregnant.
The thought of my dad impregnating her seriously terrified me. We kept exchanging glances at one another all through dinner. I wasn’t sure what he was thinking, but he didn’t look like he was enjoying himself. After dessert was served and all the guests were full, everyone sort of split off on their own. Me, Ryan, Max and Melanie hung out by the pool and listened to some tunes, while the grownups sat on some patio furniture inside the glass solarium across from us. Indulging in some wine and fancy finger food seemed to be their kind of adult entertainment.
Vanessa had placed candles all around the edges of the pool. And there was a string of lights that hovered above the ceiling of the solarium, adding a beautiful romantic glow to the atmosphere around us.
“So, are you two like…dating?” Melanie asked me. She was a cute redhead with dark green eyes.
Ryan looked at me as I sat down on his lap and fed him a strawberry off my plate.
“I think we’re still trying to figure that out,” he stared at me and smiled softly. “But I wish she would say yes and be my girlfriend already.”
Melanie blushed in embarrassment. I think she was hoping he would take an interest in her. Her brother had this borderline Goth look going on. His bottom lip and eyebrow was pierced, and he had dyed his hair black and blue; looked kind of cool though.
“Do you guys want to get out of here? I’ve got some weed on me. We could roll a joint.” Max discreetly pulled out a zip-lock bag full of marijuana from his pocket.
“Tempting, but I don’t think we can sneak away while Aria’s under her dad’s radar.”
So I guess Ryan had
noticed him stealing glances at me all evening.
“Put that shit away Max. You’re going to get us in trouble. The last thing I need is getting grounded again because of your stupid fuck ups.” Melanie glared at her brother.
“Sorry the dinner party’s so lame guys.”
“It’s okay. We usually get forced to come along with our parents. At least you guys are our age. Normally I end up babysitting annoying little toddlers for the whole evening while our parents party it up.
They should at least pay me!”
We all laughed with Mel and started to chat about music, our favorite bands, movies, and what we planned to do once we graduated high school.
Ryan and I were getting pretty touchy feely
with one another. I was really enjoying his company. He smelled really nice. I think I had a cologne fetish or something, and I just couldn’t stop laughing and giggling in his lap. He was whispering really sweet things in my ear and totally charming me. Eventually, I stopped looking over at Noah and focused more on Ryan. But whenever I did
look at him, his eyes were expectantly glued on me.
“So, will you go out with me Next Friday?” Ryan kissed my shoulder and I smiled naturally.
But before I could answer him, Noah caught my attention. “Aria, can you come inside and give me a hand please?” Great.
“I’ll be right back guys.” I got off his lap and took my time walking into the house; my heels slowly clicking down the pavement.
The music was louder inside. My dad had installed these pretty sweet speakers all over the house that had a wireless connection to the iPod docking station that was mounted into the wall of the living room. Vanessa’s lounge music was pretty good, much to my surprise.
I thought Noah was in front of me, but I couldn’t see him when I walked into the kitchen, and that’s when someone suddenly grabbed my wrist from behind. I quickly whipped my head around in reaction.
“Noah? What are you—” I felt my body jerk backwards and he quickly pulled me into a room and shut the door. There was a look of fury in his eyes. It exhilarated me and made me tremble all at the same time.
“Are you trying to make me jealous on purpose?”
I paused for a moment and narrowed my eyes. “Jealous
? What are you talking about?”
He pressed his palm against my stomach and gently pushed back; trapping me between his body and the door as he rested his free hand against the wall just above my shoulder. There was a dangerous calmness within the blue depths of his eyes. Here I was in the lion’s den, unarmed and vulnerable.
“You know exactly
what I’m talking about. That boy’s
been all over you tonight.”
I scowled at him. How dare he assume he had some claim
“Excuse me? I think you made your choice pretty clear when you fucked your wife in the shower
His eyes widened a bit. “Watch your language.
It’s not what you think,” Noah backed off and ran his fingers through his hair. “And we didn’t—” he made sure to lower his voice. “Fuck.”
“Yeah? Then what did you do? Because she looked pretty post orgasmic
when she walked into the kitchen and groped your ass right in front of me.”
He let out an exasperated sigh and fixed his piercing gaze on me. “Vanessa just hopped into the shower unexpectedly. What was I supposed to do? Tell her to get out? She’s my wife, Aria.”
,” I folded my arms against my chest. “I really don’t see the point in having this conversation. You were all hesitant about us being together, so you should be happy that I’m moving on with Ryan.”
“Is that what you’re doing? Moving on?"
he sounded condescending. "I thought you were in love with me.” I watched his eyes darken.
“Be careful, Noah. You almost sound like a jealous lover. And I say almost,
because technically you’re not
my lover.” I sounded sarcastic and bitchy.
“So you were
trying to get me jealous.” He cocked his head to the side, and I shivered slightly when he took a step closer to me. His voice was deceptively calm. Like the stillness of a lake, but the undertone was hard and glacial. Why did he have to be so damn attractive? He looked so sexy in black. I couldn’t get the image of his naked body out of my head; it just kept flickering in front of my vision every time I looked at him; Noah without his shirt on. “Answer me, Aria.”
He growled, pulling me deep into that magnetic stare of his.
I swallowed hard and tried not to fall under his compulsion. The energy in the room had quickly shifted between us. I could feel it. He could feel it. We both felt it.
“How dare you assert your authority over me when I’ve done nothing wrong! You’re the one who’s betrayed me! Last night was such a monumental moment in my life. I poured my heart out to you and what do you do? Screw your wife in the shower the following morning like my feelings meant nothing! Like what we shared meant nothing!” Oh god.
Here it was; those stupid tears. I dropped my arms and turned to walk out the door, but he stopped me and twisted me around so that my back was slammed against the wooden surface once again.
“Not so fast,” his voice was harsh and there was something raging in his eyes. It secretly aroused me. I think I enjoyed provoking his inner beast to come out and say hi, even though Noah was trying his hardest to control his temper. "You’re going to listen
to what I have to say and you’re going to listen well."
“No! I’m done with this useless conversation. You want me to listen? Then answer me this; what did you do with her in the shower?”
We stared each other down for the longest five seconds as if it were some staring contest.
“You really want to know?” something in his voice had changed. Even his eyes were different. I didn’t feel like it was Noah looking back at me anymore. Did he remove his mask? Was this his true face?
I couldn’t find the words to answer him. So I just waited, expecting that he’d reveal the truth.
Do you want to know or not? Answer me!”
I winced and frowned at him. “Stop yelling!”
He sneered at me and leaned in closer, placing both palms against the wall. I was surely trapped now with no way to escape.
“She gave me the most mind blowing head
ever. I don’t think I’ve ever ejaculated so hard in my life.” There was a razor sharp edge in his voice.
Whoa, this was definitely not my dad at the moment. He was never this vulgar.
It felt like he was stomping all over my heart and wounding whatever was left of my ego. I opened my mouth to say something in defense of my shattered pride, but he pressed his index finger against my lips. His eyes were penetrating right through me.
“The reason why I was able to achieve such a record breaking cum shot was because I thought of you
the entire time. I had to close my eyes. I couldn’t even watch Vanessa because the thought of you sucking me off turned me on in ways that I thought were never possible.” He finally dropped his hand. Unbelievable.
“I’m sure you returned the favor.” I said bitterly.
“I. Didn’t. Fuck. Her
.” He expressed through gritted teeth. I think that was translation for; yes I did everything except shoving my cock in her.
“I don’t care
if you fucked her
. You can fuck her as much as you want! Fuck her until your dick falls off!” I couldn’t control my anger any longer. We both had a temper. I guess it was another thing we had in common.
“I said watch your mouth young lady—” He was gradually raising his voice at me, but he didn’t intimidate me any longer. I had too much adrenaline coursing through my veins to back down now. It felt quite liberating.
, so you can curse and be as lewd as you want when it comes to discussing your recent debaucheries
, but I can’t? Enough with the hypocrisy, Noah—”
“Dammit Aria, stop mind fucking me!”
“Well at least I’m fucking some part of you
since you refuse to sleep with me!” I shouted back even louder than him. This little kitty just transformed into one very
“I don’t want you dating him.” His face was serious, and it sounded more like a demand than anything.
“You can’t stop me.”
“I forbid you
.” Noah’s voice took on a dark and threatening tone.
“You can’t forbid me.” I argued back, defiantly.
There was a loud bang and I immediately jumped because he had smashed his fist into the wall. “Stop provoking me!”
“You betrayed me!” I refused to allow him to win this battle and pushed him away from me, screaming at him as angry tears streaked down my face.
“I betrayed my wife!” His voice trembled with rage and despair.
me!” “You’ve been hurting me all evening! Cutting my heart out and pouring salt all over it like you don’t give a bloody fuck!”
No way. Was he really that
hurt over Ryan and me cuddling and flirting with each other? I couldn’t believe it, but the truth was right in front of me. Everything in his eyes expressed his emotional turmoil. He looked like a man haunted by a secret that so needed to come out. How was it possible that he was jealous of some high school boy? Noah was Alpha of the wolves; highest in rank in all things. Of course Ryan was good looking, but he was nothing compared to the Godlike beauty that Noah naturally possessed.
Silence fell between us. Yet neither of us looked away from each other.
“Well, I guess now you know what heart ache feels like.” I just couldn’t hold back my vindictiveness. I had to say it.
“Don’t you dare tell me what heart ache is like, little girl.”
those blue eyes were blazing and his voice was ice cold. It was quite the contrast. He made me feel like Little Red Riding Hood
, trapped in a corner with the big bad wolf.
“I have every right to tell you! You put me through sixteen years of it. Heart ache and pain has been my entire life in a fucking nut shell! Tell me, Noah. What have you
gone through? You recovered just fine from your sad but inevitable breakup with your high school sweetheart, A.K.A
my mother. You moved on just fine without me. Your conscience didn’t seem to burden you heavy enough to remind you that I still
existed and needed you
. You got married. You became a hot shot lawyer, achieved all this material wealth, and created this perfect life for yourself. What heartache could you have possibly suffered along the way? Huh? Not being there for me all those years back?
Don’t bother categorizing that as legitimate pain. I’m sure you regret the day you ever came back into my life. I hate you!”
What originally started out as egotistical warfare, transitioned into a heart hunting game of slaughter, and I had completely assassinated his character all under 30 seconds. I was ruthless, and I was aware of it. I knew I had deeply wounded him. That look on his face said it all, and I immediately regretted what I said as soon as those ugly words came out of my mouth. Oh god, how could I hurt him this way? An overwhelming sense of self-loathing sagged over my shoulders, and I knew I was screwed because it was too late to take back what I said.
That’s when all the hurt in his eyes suddenly transformed into something else; the ocean tide was turning and gaining more height and strength like a tsunami about to crash upon the shore. I stood there alone. Facing my fear, waiting for the violent wave to obliterate me as his expression hardened.
“Hating someone sounds like the beginning of an epic love story.”
The monstrous tidal wave drew back and died down. He spared me.
I didn’t hate Noah. I loved him. I was in
love with him. I just hated the way he made me feel; so vulnerable and inferior to him.
“Is that your cliché attempt at admitting you’re in love with me?”
He intensified his stare and deepened his voice. “What if I am?”
No, that wasn’t possible. “You either are or you’re aren’t.” I huffed in frustration.
“I think you’re trying
to get a rise out of me on purpose. You’re deliberately attempting to hurt me and make me angry so you can be justified in running away.”
Holy shit, how did he know me so well?
“Do you really think I’m going to abuse you the way Rob did? Throw you around and hit you?”
“You punched your fist through the wall.” I murmured.
“And I’d rather break my knuckles a hundred fucking times over than to ever lay a finger on you!” He snapped.
Uh oh, I had woken up the sleeping dragon.
“You think I’m like every other abusive asshole that has been in your life, but I’ve got news for you. I’m not.
I was at a loss for words. He totally had me beat.
“You say you know me Aria, but you have no idea who I am, or what I’m capable of.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“Did I not make myself clear earlier? Are you deaf
?” There was hostility in his tone.
I didn’t like this Noah. There was no warmth in his eyes.
“I told you I’d never be violent towards you.”
“So emotionally abusing me is better?”
“If anyone’s being emotionally abused
here it’s me. Is this all a game to you? Manipulating my feelings and fucking with my head all evening! Do you enjoy it? Does it get you off knowing that you have the ability to completely mind fuck me?!”
My lips trembled as I struggled to strengthen my wounded pride and speak up for myself. “You’re just too proud to admit that I get under your skin!”
“Oh you’ve gotten much deeper
than that. Trust me,” he suddenly moved forward and closed the gap between us, resting his hands against the wall and trapping me once more. I shuddered when he leaned into my ear and whispered; “You’re in my veins, swimming in my bloodstream…”
My breath caught as I closed my eyes and fell under his seductive spell. But then he drained all emotion from his voice, filling it with resentment; “And I hate it
His confession made me shiver to the core and my body suddenly blazed up reaching a fever pitch, as my heart pounded in my chest. He was too close for comfort.
I stood motionless and watched him slowly pull away. Our eyes met and he held my gaze, transfixed by the dark mysticism in his eyes. As much as I wanted to abandon my stubborn pride, it was a difficult struggle.
“Yeah? Well if you hate me that much I can easily solve your problem.”
I took a step forward to make him back off, but he quickly caught me off guard. Noah slid his arm down from the wall, and pushed his hand against my stomach so that my back bumped into the door, leaving me virtually fixed in place. My heart was racing a mile a minute and I wasn’t sure what he was going to do next, but my stomach was in knots indicating my arousal. Even though we were having this horribly heated argument, I couldn’t deny the way he made me feel when he was standing so close to me. Touching me.
“Tell me you want me, or get out.”
Those walls I had reinforced around me were slowly falling to my feet as I stood there, motionless and silent in shock. I felt sick to my stomach when he moved his hand away from my abdomen. As if his touch was the only thing that was keeping me together, making me ill upon the loss of contact. I couldn’t bear it.
“I wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you.” I fought so hard to hold his gaze as his brilliant blue eyes stared right through me. Willing me to let go and submit to him. And I did just that, allowing the last wall in front of me to crumble to the ground. There were no barriers between us now, and I was completely exposed once again.
His mouth was wet and slick as it crashed down hard against mine. Our tongues immediately reuniting and brushing against each other as if it had been a lifetime that passed since we last shared such a passionate kiss. I was completely engulfed by the heat that exploded from his mouth as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself flush against his body. I needed to feel him. I needed him all over me; his scent all over my body, claiming me.
A soft moan escaped from my lips when I felt Noah press his hard on right against me. He wrapped one arm around my waist, making me arch my back for him before he slowly glided his palm down over my curved bottom, groping me hard while he guided my right leg up against his waist with his free hand. Every inch of my body was covered in land mines and only his touch was able to detonate them.
I was free falling once more, but I knew that he would catch me, shield me with his wings and take me above the clouds into his hidden world of euphoric paradise; safe from prying eyes, safe from persecution and judgement. He couldn’t have been all human. He must’ve been a hybrid of some sort. Half man, half beast, or a fallen angel.
I was so lost in him, surrendering to the sliding sensation of our lips floating together. I could’ve kissed a hundred of the world’s most good looking men and not one of them would’ve been able to make me feel the way Noah did when he kissed me. He completely consumed me, body and soul. I couldn’t tear my lips away from his, nor did I want to. He held onto my thigh and sucked back my bottom lip before grazing his lips down my jaw line, kissing the side of my neck with a hunger that that wouldn’t seem to be sated until I moaned for him.
“You’re mine, Aria.”
Noah said in between kisses, while I struggled to catch my breath. Tangling my fingers in his hair, I pulled his head down harder into my neck, secretly hoping that he would leave a trace of a hickey on my skin.
“I’m yours.” I breathed, closing my eyes when I felt his lips travel down to my breasts, licking and kissing my exposed cleavage. He was making me so hot. I so badly needed him to put out the fire he had ignited inside me.
My fingers trailed lower from the nape of his neck, brushing down his sculpted shoulders and chest while I began to undo the buttons of his shirt. I needed to touch his skin, like I needed water to survive and he didn’t stop me as he continued to kiss me in that magnificent art form that he had mastered and possessed through years of experience and skill. His passion for me was unrelenting and fervent. The most feral groan escaped from his lips when I slid my hand into his open shirt and placed my palm flat against his chest, right where the black dragon tattoo had wrapped its talons around his heart. It was my favorite part of his body, because he had tattooed my name there.
I was scared out of my mind that my stepmom would come in looking for us, but a part of me truly did wish for discovery. I hated loving Noah in the shadows. It hurt. But right there, in that moment, nothing else mattered. Not my fears, insecurities or desolating thoughts of the future.
,” he growled against my lips and pulled back, breathing just as hard as I was. “We have to stop. I’m not thinking clearly. We have guests over.”
I pushed back his shirt over his shoulders, then caressed the smooth surface of his muscular chest with both my hands. Slowly leaning closer, I lightly grazed my lips against his, teasing him once more.
“I don’t want you to. I want you all for myself.”
“I could kiss you for hours.” His admission sent my heart soaring as he initiated another kiss that only picked up momentum, growing more passionate and heated. I wasn’t sure if it was my skin that felt hot or if it was the scorching heat that radiated from his chest, infusing into the palm of my hand.
I was disappointed when Noah pulled himself away from my greedy lips. “Do you want me?”
“I do baby, so badly.” The honesty in his eyes moved me as he softened his tone and expression. Fortunately for me, he hadn’t let go of my thigh or my ass just yet. And my dress had hiked up so high that I was sure he could see my black lace panties if he looked down.
“I’m sorry for what I said earlier.”
“It’s okay,” he kissed me tenderly. “I know you didn’t mean it. You don’t know half of what I can handle from you.”
I almost wanted to cry, disbelieving that I was capable of being so terribly heartless with my words. With ardent affection, I slowly rubbed and caressed the dragon that had tangled its talons around Noah’s heart. And that’s when it hit me; I was that dragon.
I possessed his heart, and I was the only one who had the power to completely destroy him, the only one who could make him bleed. He kissed my lips once more while I silently made a wish to the other half of myself that had been inked across his chest in symbolic spiritual form. I prayed for patience and understanding so that I could take better care of his heart and not dig my claws any deeper than they already were.
“Noah, honey? Is everything okay in there?
Oh crap, that was Vanessa behind the door. He immediately pulled away from me and buttoned his shirt, while I pulled down the hem of my dress. We looked like two guilty lovers on the verge of being discovered.
There was a flicker of worry in his eyes when I was wiping my gloss off his lips, but he impressively composed himself and opened the door once I finally stepped aside.
“Hey, yeah everything’s fine. Aria needed to talk to me for a bit.”
“Oh, is she alright?”
“Yeah, she’s okay.”
My stepmom stepped into the room, and I just stood there feeling nervous and extremely territorial over my dad. I really couldn’t handle it if she kissed him in front of me again. There was nothing short of me going completely ape shit. Luckily she didn’t notice the huge hole in the wall next to the door.
“Sweetie, you know you can talk to me whenever you need.”
I tied to smile politely and hide my scathing expression. “Yeah, I know. It was just about my mom and step dad—sort of needed Noah’s advice about something.”
“Oh, I totally understand,” and then she turned to my dad. “We’re kind of being bad hosts at the moment—”
“Yeah, I’m right behind you.”
I rolled my eyes and was relieved when she disappeared out the door. Noah looked back at me and held out his hand for me to hold, and I accepted because I was desperate for any kind of physical contact with him. I slipped my hand into his and let him lead me back into the kitchen.
“There you are, I was beginning to worry you dropped a glass and cut yourself or something.” Ryan took me by surprise and I instinctively withdrew my hand away from Noah’s.
“No, I’m fine. I just needed to talk to my dad about something. It was kind of important.”
He came over to me and kissed my cheek, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me closer towards him. I’m sure Noah felt like some lone wolf had just trotted over to his pack and was sniffing, harassing and pursuing his Alpha female, challenging him to a fight to the death. Ryan wouldn’t win though. This I was sure of. Noah’s deadly glare said it all.
I could smell his cologne and after shave all over me, and it absolutely delighted my senses, teasing me with the undeniable fact that his body had been in such close proximity to mine.
“Do you need a hand, Mr. Hunter?”
“No, Aria can help me. Thanks though.”
Ryan was my only friend who had to address Noah so formally. Usually my dad always insisted that everyone call him by his first name, but I guess it didn’t surprise me given his feelings of animosity towards the high school dream jock.
“I’ll be right out, Ryan.”
He smiled pleasantly at me and kissed my hand before leaving. This was infuriating Noah because I heard him curse under his breath once Ryan was out of earshot.
“Okay, I’ve got the margaritas prepared. Just carry out the other two trays I left on the counter.” Vanessa walked past us, leaving me alone with my dad again.
“You shouldn’t have led him on, Aria,” he walked with this intimidating air of dominance, but I found it sexy as hell. “I want him in friend zone, a-sap.
” Noah Hunter and his continuous demands
; they never seemed to end.
“I’ll friend zone him just as soon as you friend zone
Vanessa.” I made sure to keep my voice down.
His arm brushed against mine as we stood by the trays full of margarita glasses that were resting on the island. We stared at one another for the longest while, and I’m sure he felt like I was challenging him, pressing his buttons and pushing his boundaries. Honestly, I was expecting him to fight me on my request and tell me that Vanessa was his wife, blah, blah, blah…
but his response totally left me stunned.
“Fine.” Wow…he caved.
I smiled triumphantly, picked up my tray and left him in the kitchen, hoping that he would at least enjoy the view from behind as I made my way out.oOo
The house guests started leaving a little after midnight. The only people who were still over were Ryan and Vanessa’s trainer Brendan. He seemed to hit it off really well with Vienna since they couldn’t stop flirting with each other.
“Sorry about the overcrowded evening, it was unexpected.” I said to Ryan as we both sat across one another on some patio furniture by the pool. The temperature was perfect. If there was one thing I loved about living in Cali, it was the climate.
“No, it’s cool. Made me feel more comfortable actually.” he laughed lightly. “Your dad and stepmom are really nice.”
“Yeah, well Vanessa loves to take care of her guests. You don’t want to see her on a bad day though.”
He laughed and then reached for my hand. “Dance this song with me.”
“Oh, no. I can’t dance! I’ll step all over your shoes.” I lied.
“No you won’t, come on.” He pulled me up on my feet and led me to a safe distance away from the edge of the pool, before he wrapped his arms around me.
“Last dance before the night is over.” Ryan whispered in my ear. His body felt warm and inviting, but it didn’t have the same effect on me the way Noah’s did when he enveloped his arms around me.
Vienna and Brendan suddenly appeared next to us, slow dancing close together.
“We want to join the dance party too! Come on honey.” My stepmom hollered. She pulled Noah over to us and took his drink out of his hand, setting it on one of the patio tables before forcing herself into his arms.
Well, this certainly felt a little uncomfortable. Noah didn’t look too happy. I’m sure he thought I was enjoying myself, but I tried to communicate how much I wished I was dancing with him instead. Ryan slowly swayed me side to side in time with the music, gently caressing my lower back.
I looked over his shoulder and locked eyes with Noah as the song played out. I didn’t exactly like the fact that Vanessa was dancing in his arms, but that one look in his eyes said it all; he longed for me just as much I longed for him.
The song was slow and seductive, and made me feel a little sad because I so badly wanted Noah’s hands on my body; alone, just the two of us dancing under the stars. Everyone and everything had faded around us as we both stared at each other, telepathically expressing what our hearts and bodies so desperately desired.
I was literally falling in love with the song and decided to add it to my own personal bucket list dedicated to everything that I wanted to do with him before I died; Dance to my favorite slow jam with Noah *****
The night had finally come to a close. Noah and Aria were at the front foyer talking with Ryan before he left, while Vanessa was cleaning up in the kitchen. But little did they know that someone was keeping a watchful eye on them. She noticed the way they flirtatiously interacted with one another once the house guest left. She observed the way Aria intertwined her fingers in his before he pulled her into his arms and kissed her on the lips; slow and sensually.
Vienna’s heart dropped as she held back a gasp and clasped her hand over her mouth. She quickly fled the scene and walked into the kitchen.
“Vanessa, there’s something I need to tell you.”
The blonde bombshell finished putting a load into the dish washer and smiled at her sister. “What’s up?”
“Stop what you’re doing, and come with me.”oOo
Music inspired in chapter: Check them out! All music can be found in my video gallery or YT. Some of the tunes are very sexy ;)
TRACKS PLAYING AT THE DINNER PARTY
-Plan B - Love Goes Down
-Blind Benny - No Honor [Different Sleep Remix]
-Wayward - Only Flaw
-David Stewart -Silly Boy [Prod. by Sango]
-Sebastien Faure - Mary's Flight
-Vario Volinski - Falling In Love [Original Mix]
-The XX - Do You Mind [Derek Walin Remix]
-AWOLNATION- Sail [music playing when Noah and Aria are arguing]
-Chris Isaak - Wicked Game [Adriatique & Thyladomid Edit]
-Jhené Aiko - Mirrors [J£ZUS MILLION Edit] (music playing when Noah and Aria are dancing on the patio)
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with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.
<a href="http://www.lushstories.com/stories/incest/i-shouldnt-feel-this-way-chapter-19.aspx">I Shouldn't Feel This Way- Chapter 19</a>