I Shouldn't Feel This Way- Chapter 8

Chapter 8
“Hey angel…close your eyes.” His voice was soft and soothing.

“What time is it?” Aria asked; her voice a little groggy from the deep slumber that crept up on her.

“It’s a little past ten.”

“I should call mom.”

“Don’t worry about her, I’ll send her a text.”

“I don’t want to go home. I want to stay here with you.” She was half asleep, but completely vulnerable, confessing truths like an honest drunk, except she wasn’t intoxicated. She was sober. The only person who had intoxicated her was Noah.

He smiled warmly at her and held her tightly in his arm, while he leaned back against the sofa. Aria curled up into his lap, wrapped her arms around his shoulders and rested her head against the crook of his neck, breathing him in.

Noah froze. He didn’t know what to do. Initially he planned on taking her to bed so she could lie down and sleep comfortably, but for some reason, he didn’t want to get up. The deepest part of him recognized the fact that he enjoyed holding her.

Ignoring his need to feel some sort of contact with her, he chose her comfort over his own and stood up, carrying her to his bed. His bedroom was huge, and as soon as he placed her down on the mattress, he turned on the bedside lamp so that it wasn’t completely dark.

Aria stirred and woke again.

“Don’t go, please don’t leave me.”

Noah was about to put one foot out the bedroom door when he turned around and looked back at his frightened little girl, who looked crushingly defenceless and emotionally exposed, revealing her inner fear; which was abandonment. He realized this right away and it broke his heart because that was the last thing he wanted her to feel again. He slowly sauntered back towards the bed which was covered in a luxurious gold colored duvet, with expensive white Egyptian cotton sheets. There was a cluster of luxury pillows sprawled out, resting against the mahogany colored headboard. Her small frame looked even tinier on that bed.

“I’m here baby girl.”

Noah sat on the edge of the bed and smiled as she kept staring at him with sleepy eyes.

“I think all that shopping tired you out huh?”

She nodded with a smile, pulling on his arm so that he would lie down next to her and he did. Noah Hunter wasn’t the kind of man who would ever submit to anyone, including his wife. Many times Vanessa demanded his affections, and his time, but it always had to be on his terms, and at his convenience. He was an Alpha, and there was never a moment in his life where he relinquished control over himself to another woman.

It was in that moment that he realized, that his daughter had power to strengthen him, or destroy him, because he would’ve gone to the ends of the Earth to make her happy, and there was a huge chance that she would ruin and finish him along the way. What if his love wasn’t enough? What if she wouldn’t be satisfied with all that he would lay at her feet? What if she secretly desired revenge and would never love him? There were so many what ifs, it was making him scared inside, because Noah wasn’t used to that kind of vulnerability. He was a man of control and when it came to his daughter, he just couldn’t control her thoughts and feelings.

Aria moved his arm so that it was resting flat on the bed and she slowly moved in closer to his body, curling up next to his chest. She looked like a beautiful kitten.

Noah slightly turned his body so that he was able to look at her face. Her eyes were shut and she let out a contented sigh that made him smile. She looked incredibly peaceful and just as beautiful in her sleep. He was fascinated and stunned that he created such a human being, thatshe had his DNA, Aria was a part of him and blood ties never lie.

He gently caressed the side of her face, brushing her hair back in a soothing motion. She was his precious little gift. He was very young when she was born, but in that moment, he thanked whatever powers that existed above, for bringing her back to him. He knew he could never let her go and she would indeed have him on his knees. Noah realized that Aria would be the only woman in his life that would make him fall to his knees before her. The only one who could obliterate his pride and make him feel desperation. And it scared him to death.

He laid there with her for the longest while before he remembered that he had to call her mom, so Noah carefully slipped out of bed and tip toed back to the living room. He pulled out his cellphone and let out an exasperated sigh before dialing Emily’s cell number.

He had been expecting her to pick up, when a man’s voice answered the phone.

“Hello?”

Noah didn’t say anything. He quickly glanced at his mobile and noticed that he had dialed Emily’s landline by mistake.

Fuck. He cursed under his breath. He knew who he was speaking to on the other end. He just didn’t want Aria to be present when he had this conversation with him.

“Hello!?”

“Is this Robert?”

“Yeah, who the hell are you?”

“Put Emily on the phone.” He tried to keep his voice down so that he wouldn’t wake his daughter.

“I said, who the fuck are you?”

Noah closed his eyes and began to pace around the living room windows, silently counting to ten, praying he wouldn’t lose his temper because boy did he want to give that man an earful, including a mouthful of broken teeth once he got the satisfaction of punching him in the face.

“Listen you fat fuck, put Emily on the phone now and I’ll consider not putting you in the hospital when I see your disgusting face.” He growled through gritted teeth.

“Who the fuck do you think you are you low life mother fucker!?” Rob had an obnoxious voice, followed by a New Yorker’s accent. Emily’s voice could soon be heard in the background as she struggled to take the phone out of her husband’s hand.

Noah knew he could’ve just hung up and called her cellphone, but he was too prideful to back away from that coward.

“Noah?”

“Well finally, took you long enough.” He really wanted to smoke a cigarette, even though he had promised Vanessa he would quit.

“When are you bringing Aria back home? You said after dinner, it’s late!”

“Calm your tits Em, she’s with me, not some hormonal teenaged boy who’s going to get her drunk and date rape her.”

“Sounds like something very similar that happened to me.”

“What the hell are you implying? I didn’t date rape you, you were a horny little slut!”

“How dare you talk to me that way!”

Rob started yelling a string of profanities at him from behind the phone.

“Get your rabid dog on a leash.” Noah rested his hand against the wall and looked out the window. He just couldn’t push the urge to smoke out of his head. It’s how he normally dealt with stress.

“Bring her home Noah. Now.”

“She fell asleep, we’re at my hotel. I don’t want to wake her.”

“Aria has school tomorrow and all her things are at home.”

“She brought her school bag with her before we left her school and I took her shopping, so she can get dressed from here and I’ll drive her to school tomorrow.”

“Noah why are you being so difficult? You’ve won already! Let me spend as much time with my daughter as I can before you take her from me by force!”

“No Emily! You are the one who’s being difficult and for the past 16 years you’ve been unfair to me and to Aria!” His hand was trembling from the adrenaline of his rage that was metamorphosing inside of him.

“Stop blaming me for your failures Noah! You’re not the victim in all this, our daughter us!”

He took a moment to cool down his temper before he smashed something. He didn’t want to injure his fist or wake Aria up. Noah loved his daughter but by God, he sure as hell hated her mother.

“She’s staying over tonight. End of discussion Emily, you can have her tomorrow, and I swear on her life if I see so much as a scratch on her, I will put your husband in a coma and chances are he won’t ever wake up.”

“Save your threats Noah.”

He was about to retort back with some real heavy ammunition when all he heard was the dial tone. She had hung up. Well, it was clear he had won this battle. If Aria hadn’t been around, he would’ve smashed everything that came in his line of sight; Noah was raging inside and had no way of relieving himself of these emotions.

Surrendering to temptation, he quickly grabbed his pack of cigarettes from his trench coat and stepped outside. He hadn’t bothered to throw on a jacket, so he just stood outside with his shoes on and opened his box of cigarettes. As soon as he opened it, he read the little inscription he had written with a blue ink pen;

I Noah Hunter have officially quit smoking. 
This is my last full box of cigarettes and also a reminder 
Of my commitment to never touch a cancer stick again. 
Jan/1/2012- 12:00AM 
N.M.H 
The hot shot lawyer had remained nicotine free for the past 11 months, he was going to throw all that hard work and commitment away in ten short seconds. All he had to do was light up and take a drag.

“Noah?”

Half panicking, he shoved the pack of smokes into his front pocket and turned around. His daughter was leaning her weight against the doorframe which separated the terrace from the living room.

“Hey, why did you wake up?”

“I thought I heard voices.”

Noah silently cursed himself because he knew he most likely woke her up. He leaned back against the concrete railing and folded his arms against his chest.

“What are you doing out here?” She rubbed the side of her arms, feeling the cold autumn chill in the air; winter was almost on its way.

“Aria get inside, you’ll catch a cold. I was just getting some air.”

“Oh.”

She stepped out onto the cold concrete and walked towards him. He watched her face and wondered if she noticed the outlined box of cigarettes that he had stealthily stashed away in his front left pocket.

“I missed you.” It sounded like a silent whimper, as Noah felt his daughter wrap her slender arms around his waist. It had taken him by surprise, he wasn’t expecting her to be so affectionate to him so soon, but her embrace was well received as he enveloped his arms around her, shielding her from the cold frost of the night. The wind danced through her dark silky hair, whipping it side to side around her face.

Noah could feel her shivering and he tightened his arms around her. Surprisingly he wasn’t very cold; his body temperature seemed to be function at a higher degree than the average man.

“Sweetie you’re shivering, let’s get you inside.” He spoke in her ear with a hushed tone, and then kissed her head before pulling away.

Noah grabbed her hand and led her inside, shutting the sliding screen door and locking it.

Aria took her phone out of her handbag and gasped, catching her father’s attention.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh my god it’s almost midnight. Rob and mom are going to flip.”

He casually walked towards her and rested his palm on the counter, leaning his weight against it. “Relax, I called her and told her you were tired so you’re staying the night. She was cool with it.”

Aria arched an eyebrow at him. “That’s strange…”

“Why?” He challenged her with a smug smile on his face.

“Because that’s so not mom behaviour.”

“Well maybe you should just trust in your father’s charismatic ways with women.” More likethreatening ways. He was certainly not to be trifled with. Nobody wanted to be on Noah Hunter’s bad side.

She smiled softly at him and ran her fingers through her hair.

“You can sleep on the bed. I’ll crash out here on the sofa.”

Aria frowned. “Can you please just lay with me for a bit until I fall asleep?”

Noah seemed a little apprehensive about it at first, but he eventually acquiesced.

They walked back into the bedroom and he decided to tease her a bit.

“By the way, you snore so loud in your sleep.”

Aria looked mortified. “I do not!”

“Do too!” He laughed and gently nudged himself against her arm while she nudged back.

“Do not!”

“How do you know you don’t? Do you listen to yourself when you sleep? You were snoring so loud I had to shut off the movie because I couldn’t concentrate.” He started laughing so hard but just as quick as the laughter came, it soon faded because he noticed that she was taking the joke very seriously. He could see it all over her sullen face. It was like he had sucked all the life out of her eyes and it disturbed him, he wanted to make it right, and fast!

“Aria I’m just kidding…”

Her expression remained frozen for a good five seconds, and then she tackled him so that he fell on the bed.

“You are so mean! Don’t joke around with me like that!” She was upset but was laughing and relieved more than anything. Just entertaining the thought of snoring around him made her feel so humiliated.

“I’m sorry it was just too tempting.” His laughter didn’t end as she mounted him and play slapped his arms and chest.

Noah had to assert his brute strength. He grabbed Aria’s waist and rolled on top of her, grabbing her wrists and pinning them back above her head on the mattress. He was like a lion, taming his disobedient lioness, declaring his dominance over her.

Aria’s giggles ceased as she stared up at her father, lost in the intensity of his eyes, both unaware of who was drowning first. Noah’s eyes were alluring yet dangerous, like a strong ocean current pulling you in to the deep end, before you knew it, you’d be drowning. And Aria’s eyes were mesmerizing yet bewitching, she could beguile any man with just one look and she didn’t even know it, but Noah did.

“Do you surrender?” He smiled wickedly and gripped her wrists harder.

Aria laughed and shook her head. “Never.”

He smiled darkly this time and lowered his face a bit so that his lips were nearly brushing her earlobe.

“I was just joking, no need to get violent.”

His voiced held a subtle trace of seductive undertone that made her shiver. “Maybe I like violent.”

“Maybe it’s time to get changed and go to sleep, because tomorrow is a school day missy.”

“Maybe you should get off me first.” She was getting sassy with him now as she smirked at him.

“Good point.” He released her wrists and hoisted his weight off of her.

She felt disappointed at the loss of contact.