I’ve always been know to be the bad girl. I am aggressive when it comes to someone or something I want. But this man has changed me. He chopped down my confidence, and made me afraid. I wanted him in so many ways, but for the first time, didn’t know how to go about it. I used to be very open about my whereabouts, but what I have done with him, I can not tell those who are closest to me.

 

It all began on Thanks giving, when my whole family gathered for thanks giving dinner. Now, I have grown up hanging out with my cousins, but I haven’t seen them in a few years. I walked up to the door with my mom and sisters, the door opened and there he was, with a beautiful smile on his face. The last time I had seen him, he was 17, and I 13. Now I am 18 and he is 22. It was very difficult to tell at first, if he was into me, he seemed to be flirting, or maybe he was just being very friendly. When he would touch me, I would get butterflies, and I had to fight not to stare at his beautiful golden skin. I was thinking to myself all night long: “What is your problem? I must be going crazy”. He would play with me all the time and find little ways to touch me, whether it was poking me in my belly, stroking my arm when we was standing next to me, or rubbing my back when walking pass. This is how he changed me: he’s my first cousin, so I could not be open about how much I wanted him, and I could not open up to anyone about my feelings for him. I wanted him so badly, maybe even more because I couldn’t have him. The night after Thank giving, I had gone to my bed thinking about him. And that night I had the hottest dream I have ever had in my life. In my dream I was lying in my bed just as I had gone to in real life. All of a sudden there was movement under my blanket, and someone was touching me. His hands felt so good on my body, as moved from my feet up to my breast. I began to moan: “Gabriel….more…more…yes” As I moaned, he grabbed onto my body more and he licked and kissed more and more. Soon he had moved up to where his head poked out of my blanket, as he worked upwards, kissing me on my neck. He them made it up to my lips, and he kissed me so passionately…his lips were so soft. I felt his bare body against mine, as he spread my legs apart, I could smell his scent so sweetly. Then I felt something on my leg, something long and hard, and I began to get excessively wet. He then took his penis and rubbed it on my pussy, teasing me with desire. I moaned louder and louder, begging him, whispering in his ear: “Please…take me, push it in…now” The whole time he said not a word to me. Then he whispered in my ear: “How much do you want it?” “Badly” I whispered. “How much do you want it?” he asked again. “More than anything” I replied. “So take it” Gabriel commanded. And I looked into his eyes, as he stared back into mine. I then grabbed his back in a firm grip, almost scratching him, and said while looking directly into his eyes: “Take me”. Right when the head of his dick began to slide into my opening, I woke up, sweating all over, and just as wet as I was in my dream. I jumped up breathing heavily and ran to take a cold shower. I didn’t know what had gotten into me. I thought I was losing my mind. While showering, my dream was playing over and over again in my head. I was thinking about when he asked me how much I wanted him. What did this dream mean? It made me realize that I wanted him bad, but I still couldn’t get up the never to go after him, because he was my cousin. About a week later, on a Saturday night, my mother sent me to my Grandma’s house to drop off some food she had picked up for her. My cousin, when back from school in the summer, stays there with my grandma and his mom, so I was hoping to see him while not wanting to at the same time. There I was standing on the front porch, ringing the door bell, and there he came to open the door. “Hey Angel, what’s up?” He said when he opened the door. “Hey, nothing much…umm I just came to drop these off from my mom”, I said while slightly lifting the large plastic bag in my hand. “Oh well no one’s here but me” He said, as I walked in the house. “Oh dear…Is this a good thing? Could this be a trap? I should leave…no I would be stupid to leave…this is what I want” I though to myself. He took the bag out of my hand, and walked them into the kitchen, as I waited out in the hall way near the stair way. He then passed me and was on his way up the stairs. I was very confused… “Should I just leave now?” I thought to myself. Right then, he turned around while he was a few steps above me, and said: “Are you coming?” “Oh yeah…I guess” I responded a bit surprised. I followed him up stairs and into his room, where sat his friend Keith on the video game. When I saw his friend there, I was a bit surprised, relieved, and disappointed all at the same time.

I went and sat on his bed, as he walked over to his friend talking trash. About a half hour later, I was about to leave, when Gabriel’s friend Keith, got up and said: “Alright man, Imma head out to my girl’s house.” “Ok, see you later” I heard Gabriel say as he walked Keith out the door. I was still there sitting on the edge of his bed; and as I heard his foot steps run up the stairs, my heart began to beat faster and faster, as my thighs tightened up. He then walked into the room and closed the door behind him. “So…What time will grandma and Aunty Chrissa be home?”   I asked in a high voice. “Oh, not until mid night” he said while rapping up the game controllers. At the time it was only 9pm… “Wow! 3 hours…Angel, leave now…Leave right now” I said to myself in my head…But I couldn’t seem to be able to lift my ass off of his bed. Gabriel then came over and sat down right next to me. “So, what’s up?” He asked? “Oh nothing…just chillin…you know…” I replied trying to not look directly at him, because he was so close. He then moved closer to me, and then his hand moved up to my cheek, and rapped around to the back of my head. I began to breath heavily, and my heart was racing, as I whispered in an odd fear: “What are you doing?” “What does it look like?” he said while leaning in very slowly. “Have you ever done this before?” I asked. “Done what?” He asked with a confused tone. “Done anything with a relative?” I responded “No” he replied “Oh, me neither… this is a first…” I whispered quieter, as he got closed to my face. His lips then came to touch mine, and he lightly licked my bottom lip, and I sighed. I then closed my eyes, as he closed his, and he kissed me passionately, just like in my dream. I grabbed around his head, as he tugged on my t-shirt. I was breathing extremely heavy, and my heart was racing, my thighs tightened up, and I became more and more moist in my pussy. Before I knew it he had pulled my shirt over my head, and was leaning back moving up the bed. I lied down and looked at him as he ripped down the denim shorts I had on, and pulled his shirt over his head. “I’ve been wanting this for a while” He said in a low voice, while rubbing my body up and down. “I want it to…” I said. “Imma give it to you” He whispered in my ear as he lied between my legs, pulling down his basket ball shorts. And I just nodded yes, lying there, waiting for him to take me. Before I knew it we were both lying there ass naked, him between my legs, kissing on my neck, as I squeezed his biceps.   His body felt so good against mine, and he was perfectly worked out. I then whispered to him: “I want you now…please, take me”. Just as I did in my dream, but this time I didn’t wake up. I felt him rub his dick on my pussy, getting my liquids all over his hard pole. He then asked me: “How much do you want it?” And I replied… “Badly….give it to me” I wanted to stop and pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming, but I didn’t, I knew this was the real thing. I then felt him slowly slide inside of me, as I exhaled from a deep breath with a moan. It felt so good…I didn’t know what to do with my self. I grabbed and scratched his muscular back…as he moved in and out slowly loving each thrust. I looked at him, and his face was tense from the pleasure…I could tell he loved it as much as I did. I moaned and squeezed him. Clenching on to his ass, pushing him in deeper. He kissed me on my neck, and I kissed him on his…he moaned and I moaned louder, loving the feeling of him inside of me, even though it was so wrong. As time went on, the tempo sped up. He began sexing me faster and harder, pulling my legs farther apart. “You like it? Want more?” He whispered in my ear…as I replied “Yes” in a soft voice every time. “Tell me you love it”, he ordered “I love it” I followed… “Say my name”, he said while pulling up my legs with his arms, and doing me in different positions. “Gabriel” I willingly followed. “Say it louder” “Gabriel” I said “Louder” “Gabriel! Yes! Give it to me! Ooooooooh yes” I moaned. “You like it?” I asked “I love it” he responded. He began banging me harder, to the point where I was screaming, and holding on to the bed post. This was the best sex I had ever had… “I never want anyone else” I thought to myself. My pussy began leaking juices, and he loved it. He had my legs, up and open…then he sat me up and was fucking me in fusion position, then we were in the jellyfish position. We had the most intimate and exiting sex ever. He gave me an orgasm right before he came in the lotus position. We then both fell down onto the bed, lying next to each other. “That was amazing” I said, while out of breath. “Yeah, it was the best…” We lied there hugged up, him behind me, for a little while…I then began to doze off, when we were both startled by the door bell….