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Pounding The Pink Velvet Sausage Wallet

Pounding The Pink Velvet Sausage Wallet

Audio by Daisy Shylass
This poem is only available on Lush Stories. If you are reading it elsewhere, it has been stolen.

Her apple catchers hit the floor
His whanger splitting seams
A boff was on the cards tonight 
For this box of assorted creams

Her kitten noses hard and erect
Quickly with one pull
Kojak’s roll neck soon retracted
On his hardened Kosher dill

Fizzing at the bunghole
Good god now she was smitten
His hand slid over her beetle bonnet
And spanked her wet fish mitten

Her passion flaps they tingled
Choking his blue veined custard chucker
There was no denying now
That he was gonna fuck her

His beaver cleaver pulsing
She felt it and she swooned
She grabbed his arse and lost control
He pummelled her axe wound

Like an Apache riding bareback
With no Casanova’s sock
On top she got like a sausage jockey
Bouncing on that cock

Fun bags flailing all in his face
For him to suck and slurp
Mounting air from his meat seeking pissile
Forced one hell of a fanny burp

With every stroke the population paste
Rose further out of storage
He chucked his muck, her gash left looking
Like a bulldog eating porridge

-This poem would not have been possible without 'Roger's Profanisaurus'.

This poem is only available on Lush Stories. If you are reading it elsewhere, it has been stolen.
This story is protected by International Copyright Law, by the author, all rights reserved. If found posted anywhere other than with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.

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Posted 28 Sep 2013 18:29
What a funny and clever poem. Excellent poem. 5
Posted 22 Sep 2013 01:01
Fantastic. You have a way with words!
Posted 23 Jun 2013 14:28
Outrageously good!
Posted 23 May 2013 12:23
Funny girl...
Posted 30 Apr 2013 05:36

Posted 26 Apr 2013 19:27
Campy, trampy fun. Just the way I like it! Well done, CD. Still giggling.
Posted 18 Apr 2013 00:50
OH how I have missed your poems...and now with voice too! Very funny...well done!

Posted 08 Apr 2013 01:01
That was hilarious! Loved it.
Posted 17 Mar 2013 19:18
OMG. At the start of this It made no sense at all, That is until I realized that
This was all slang.. Don't think Ive heard much slang being discharged from the service.

Love your humor & really enjoyed the poem..Highly entertain g.. Thank You.. joel

Posted 11 Mar 2013 17:11
Brilliant...Nice job Shylass..
Posted 25 Feb 2013 11:33
I loved the poem and love it even more with the audio. Great job Daisy! You've got a naughty voice!

Posted 23 Feb 2013 01:49
Surely what Roger's Profanisaurus was invented for!! Brilliant.
Posted 28 Jan 2013 13:55
Excellent. Perfect crudeness.

Posted 28 Jan 2013 01:05
Posted 27 Jan 2013 08:36
I'm still laughing! What makes it funnier is that this is closer to real sex than some of the stories I've read! X
Posted 27 Jan 2013 05:50
What a crazy fun read miss diamond.
Posted 27 Jan 2013 03:27
So cleverly written, I'm in awe of this one!! Bloody well done CD.
Posted 26 Jan 2013 18:54
LOL, that is wicked and hilarious! It's totally briliiant!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 15:22
This was hilarious!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 15:19
Hey CD! Just realised you must be Roger in drag!

Posted 26 Jan 2013 14:58
Hey Iain69..."Hello, good evening and bollocks!" thanks x
Posted 26 Jan 2013 14:51
Very funny yet sexy poem! A great blend of Viz style humour / slang and hot sex. I always wanted to be Roger Melly; he was my hero!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 14:44
love it ..funny only you can write like that different indeed
Posted 26 Jan 2013 13:40
Note to self, do not read this again while drinking tea!! LOL!! I laughed my ass off!! 10 out of 5 on this one!! You got almost every crude nickname into it. It even seemed like the line about Rogers Profanisaurus was part of the poem, it sort of rhymes with porridge!!!

BTW, can I have have some of whatever you were drinking when you wrote it!!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 12:34
Great! Really funny!! 5+

Posted 26 Jan 2013 10:34
Fucking, crude, profane, dirty, filthy, hot, sexy...I loved it!! "5" +++ all the way!!


Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:55
LMFAO! My only complaint is that you don't do this more often. This is sparklingly, disgustingly funny (a bit like the author...)!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:52
Haha, loved it. I started laughing when I read the title, and continued laughing all the way through.

Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:37
Wicked poetry!!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:25
hahahaha... Excellent!!

Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:24
What a dirty diamond you are!!!

Who knew?

Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:22
Hilarious! This is awesome. Thanks!
Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:06
Hahahaha, brilliant

Posted 26 Jan 2013 09:00
You owe me an ass because I laughed mine off.

Posted 26 Jan 2013 08:54
Fantastically hilarious! Only you C! Goodness! Some of the funniest lines I have ever read! Last one is a corker! Bravo, my friend! x

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