I totally deleted you from my life;
Seeing you around only caused me strife.
Made it so I’d have to look to see if you were here;
I am trying to protect me,
After so long the urge made me look;
There you were like I have fucking e.s.p.
What are the chances the only time I look you are there?
I rack my brains; I have no idea why I should even care.
I don’t understand what I see in you?
Why can’t I resist when I know you don’t want me,
Never did only wanted a feeling I know how to give;
For this conflict in my heart there is no appease.
Just knowing what you are doing at any point in time;
Upsets me so very bad because you should be mine!
You are just an obsession that eats me alive;
Sadness and anguish in doses I can’t take,
Wanting you is making me so sick;
I don’t think there is any part of me left you can break.
How can I let you get under my skin this way?
I need you out of my head with no delay.
A phantom or a fable is all you are;
A little piece of make believe,
Teasing me with what I want;
Just to get what you think you need.
I probably need to be hypnotized;
To keep from replaying all your lies.
In my head over and over again;
My mind won’t turn off it keeps on spinning,
My heart is longing but I tell it no;
With this one there is no way you’ll be winning.
I need something real I can hold in my hand;
I tried so hard to make you understand.
Every time I put together two and two;
It never adds up to what it should be,
Your actions never equal your words;
They blatantly say you don’t care about me.
Not enough to be a lover and a friend;
I can never tell what you really intend.
I wanted to believe you so very bad;
All the things you said and the declarations you made,
Wishing you had actually been sincere;
The reality cuts me like a sharp blade.
It wasn’t my intention to be mean to you;
I was left with no option, nothing left to do.
Clouds my judgment leaving me vulnerable;
Strung along on a hope and a dream,
A desire that is never satisfied,
Nothing is ever as it seems.
It makes me feel like I’m not very smart;
Forever tormented is my troubled heart.
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