4 weeks have gone by and I still haven't heard anything from you. Just for the heck of it I check my email that we used to use for communication, wondering if you by chance remembered what it was.
"You have a new message" pops up across my screen. My heart starts to pound in anticipation. I click open and the message appears across the screen.
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Little one,
It indeed has been a long time since I have heard from you, but I have not forgotten about you either. I was not sure how to find you after all these years, but honestly never thought about actually contacting you. I do wonder how you managed to find me though, I moved 3 times since we last talked. But your letter did come as a pleasant surprise, it brought back many memories.
I read that you are married and happy, but not totally happy and that something in your life is missing. I know what you are talking about, no need to explain. I never got married and have no one in my life right now ( not that you asked or anything ) I figured I would put that out there since you did.
I do think about you, but have since tried to move past what happened. I was not sure if I wanted to write you back, but decided to anyways. I know you remember my last words upon your screen being "This is your last chance, I will not contact or respond to you. Is this your final decision" when I read your words of "yes, I am sure" that was it and I promised I wouldn't contact you again.
I do wonder what you think about? Enlighten with me some of the thoughts you have been having about me? You did say you dream about me as well, what were the dreams about? Again, it was nice to hear from you. maybe I will again.
~ Sir J ~
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Now that my heart has dropped back down out of my throat, I can maybe regain some composure. What am I going to say back? I didn't expect a response back from him. I click on the reply button and start to type. my words pour out without even thinking about it.
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Sir,
I honestly did not expect to hear back from you, though I was hoping I would and was waiting anxiously. To be honest you wouldn't have found me even if you were looking for me. I disappeared from home shortly after that message, I went sort of MIA. I had joined the carnival and was traveling the US with them for a while and let myself go. I wanted nothing to do with anything from my past or anyone for that matter, not even family.
You wonder how I found you, well I did learn a few things while being a carny.