Cary was unsettled. She worked in one of those non-descript buildings that pervasively dots industrial parks. In fact, it was an engineering firm doing designer work in plastics, PVC, and other combinations of unpronounceable chemicals. Officially, Cary was the receptionist and accounting technician. However, the company had few walk-ins, so they kept her out front so the young engineers, designers, and techs working “in the back” had something nice to look at as they entered and left the building.
One of the newer designers, Andrew Galbraithe, who Cary described as “a thirty-something hunk, with a shock of blonde hair and awesome sparking blue eyes” had apparently taken an interest in Cary. Unlike the other males who paraded past her station two or three times each day, leering but silent, Drew began to stop at the counter, flash his devastating smile and attempt to engage her in conversation. He dismissed her warnings that she was a married lady with the comment that they would deal with that later. In the meantime, he delved into her psyche, probing into her delights and desires. At first, his inquiries were limited to colors, music, food, and authors. The probing deepened over time, and Cary exposed her needs and wants to him, flattered by his attention and charmed by his sense of humor and charisma.
As part of the process, Drew Galbraithe shared a good deal of his own substance with her. Over the course of a month their relationship grew from acquaintances to workplace friends. Cary considered him polite and never pushy. Yet a question asked and unanswered one day would reappear and be resolved on a subsequent day.
The day she came home unsettled was the day that the questions began to involve physical contact.
“It seemed so innocent,” she told her husband as they sat at dinner. “He asked if could take my hand between his own. At first, I said no. Then he specifically asked for my left hand, the one with my wedding ring. He said it would remind him that I was married and calm any fears I had that he would be inappropriate. It sounded reasonable. So, I let him hold it.”
“So?” Kevin asked, encouraging her to continue.
“He touched my rings. He didn’t just touch them, though. He caressed them. He rubbed his thumb across them. He touched them with the first two fingers of his hand, lightly stroking them.”
“Did he say anything?”
“No. He just looked at them and then into my eyes. It was like he was testing to see how easily they would come off.”
Kevin laughed. “Really? Is that what he was doing or did you just think that.”
“It’s not funny, Kevin,” she said. “It did something to me.”
“What did it do?”
She was silent, deciding whether or not to answer. “It made me wet.”
“Just him touching your hand like that made you come?” Kevin chuckled.
“I didn’t come,” she protested. “I just got moist.”
“You ever get moist when I touch your rings?” he asked with a big smile.
“No,” she said into her plate. She looked up into his eyes. “I don’t think you’re taking this seriously, Kevin. This is not a joke.”
“Okay, look,” he said, setting his fork down and folding his hands in a tent over the plate. “It’s the forbidden fruit, Cary. That’s why it turned you on. You’re think you’re not supposed to get excited by another guy like that. When you do, it turns you on. It’s completely normal.”
The confession about the rings came on a Thursday night. The following Tuesday Drew approached her again.
“Hello, beautiful,” he said.
“Hush!” she admonished him. “You’ll get us both in trouble.”
He shook his head slowly. “We’re supposed to find you attractive. That why you’re here.”
“Who told you that?” she asked him.
“It’s general knowledge. I’m surprised you haven’t figured it out. You’re intelligent.”
“Stop it, Cary!”
“I won’t. This is my favorite part of the whole day. I like being close to you.”
Cary self-consciously twirled the end of her auburn hair.
“What do you want?”
“Just to talk,” he replied easily. “You were gone Friday, and Monday was a holiday. I missed you.”
“Well, I had an appointment Friday.”
“I bet it wasn’t with your gynecologist,” he smirked. “They don’t usually work on Fridays.”
“Although, if I was your OB/GYN, I’d see you anytime you wanted.”
“There’s no way you would be my OB/GYN.”
“I know,” he sounded deflated. “I know why, too.”
“Because you’re too brash. You’re always on the line of disrespect with me.”
Drew shook his head as she spoke and waved his finger. “That’s not it.”
“Do I even want to know what you think the reason is?”
“You know that every time I touched you down there you’d be on the edge of an orgasm.”
“That’s not true!” Cary nearly screamed in indignation. “You really have crossed the line this time.”
Drew shrugged. “Just the truth as I see it. I think you like my direct approach, and my openness is one of the reasons you love me.”
“Oh, my God! I don’t love you, Drew! I’ve never even considered it, and I certainly haven’t thought it.”
“I know, you’re married; happily, to a husband you love and adore.”
“So when you have sex together, do you leave the light on or turn it off?”
“That’s none of your business.”
“Of course not, but I’ll bet you’re dying to tell me. You like the lights on.”
“I am not telling you that.”
“And I bet you like missionary position, because it gives you the feeling of being taken.”
“Cary, really. This is so inappropriate.”
He ignored her protest. “Your favorite is cowgirl, though. That way you can lean forward and have your breasts kissed, licked and suckled.”
“Go back to your work station, Drew,” she ordered imperiously. “This discussion could be classified as sexual harassment. Married women do not discuss their sexual preferences with single members of the opposite sex at work.”
“You will, though, Cary,” he said, his voice soft as velvet. “You’ll tell me because you really want me to know. You’re going to tell me everything.”
“Go, Drew,” she demanded. “You’ve made me very uncomfortable.”
Cary was uncomfortable. Her panties were soaked and she knew a trip to the ladies room was of the highest priority.
Cary made her confession to Kevin that evening.
“At least he hasn’t touched me again,” she said.
“Since he rubbed my rings, he hasn’t tried to hold my hand or anything.”
“He still stops to talk, though, doesn’t he?”
She shook her head slowly. “Yeah.” Her voice was barely above a whisper.
“What’s he asking you about now?”
“Really?” he chuckled. “Like it or not? How does he do that out there in front of everybody?”
“Usually, nobody’s around. He asked me if I like the lights on or off, if I like being on my back or another position.”
“Did he ask you if you like having your nipples sucked,” I chuckled.
“More like licked, kissed and suckled.”
“No shit? What did you tell him?”
“I told him we shouldn’t be talking about things like that.”
“But then you told him.”
“I didn’t. I told him married women didn’t talk about sex with other men.”
“What did he say?”
“He said I would. He said eventually I would tell him everything.”
“He’s seducing you.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“Because,” she said softly, lowering her head. “Because I love it. I want him to touch me again. I want to feel the thrill of it. I had a dream about him. All he did was suck my fingers into his mouth. When he let them go, my rings were gone. His eyes were sparkling and the rings appeared from between his lips. I got this real knot in my belly and my heart was beating so hard and fast.”
“You got it bad, baby,” Kevin laughed.
“Don’t laugh at me, Kevin,” she said, a sob barely contained.
“I’m not laughing at you. I’m laughing at the situation.”
“Your wife wanting to have sex with somebody else is no laughing matter.”
“My wife sneaking around to have sex with somebody else is no laughing matter. But, you’re not doing that, Cary. Watching my wife inexorably seduced into having sex like this is delightful.”
“Is it going to be so delightful if I do it?”
“That all depends,” he said. “If you do it to get back at me for something, no. If you sneak around and do it behind my back, no. But, if you do it for the joy of the experience and are honest with me and still love me, yes.”
“So you don’t care if I fuck him?” She sounded astonished.
“Care? Of course I care. I’ll always care. You are my love and my life. But, if you want to do it and won’t let it affect our relationship, then I’m fine with it. If it’s just sex, do it. Enjoy it. Have fun with it.”
“You’re fucking unbelievable. How can it not affect our relationship?”
“That’s up to you, Cary. There’s fucking and there’s love. They’re two different things. If you want to screw him to find out what it would be like, then do it. If you want to fall in love with him, then we have a problem.”
“What if I like it?”
“I hope you do. I sure don’t want you to do anything you don’t like, especially if it’s for fun.”
Cary looked at him for a long time. “So, you’re telling me that it’s okay for me to fuck Drew if I don’t fall in love with him. Is that right?”
Kevin shrugged. “Pretty much. But, there is one condition. You have to tell me. I mean, you have to be honest with me.”
“You mean like, ‘Hey, honey. I’m going to fuck Drew tonight, okay?’ Like that?”
“Well, not exactly. But, something like that.”
“Then what, exactly?”
“You don’t have to ask my permission.”
“I don’t need permission?”
“You already have it, Cary. And, it would probably be better if you did it here. You’d be more comfortable.”
“Here? In our bed?”
He shrugged. “No big deal to me. Who knows? It might even turn you on when we’re together to remember him screwing you there.”
“You are un-fucking-believable!”
“I know. But, see, you’re all wrapped around this morality thing and I’m not. It’s not cheating if I know about it. You’re not deceiving me, lying to me, or cheating on me. You’re just getting laid. I don’t own you, Cary. We’re partners, friends, and lovers. Because I love you, I’m not going to stop you from having fun as long as we’re honest with each other.”
“And you’re not going to be jealous?”
“Honey, do I play tennis worth a shit?”
“No. You suck at it.”
“Right. We both know that. So, should I get all wrapped around the axle because you play tennis with somebody else, somebody who can actually play the game?”
“But, Kevin, this is fucking, not tennis!”
“Yeah. So what?”
“Fucking is special.”
“Only if you make it that way. Loving is special. Fucking is just sex. It’s all just a question of attitude.”
“What about the other stuff?”
“What other stuff?”
“I suck your cock because I love you.”
“You don’t do it because you like it?”
“Well, sure, but…”
“So try it. If you don’t like doing it, don’t.”
“Isn’t there anything special, just for us?”
“Of course. Everything between us is special. The connection between us is special. The love we have for one another is special. When we make love, it’s special.”
“So nothing’s off limits?” It was more a statement than a question.
“Attitude, Cary. It’s all about attitude.”
She sat quietly for a few minutes. “I’m going to have to think about all of this, Kevin,” Cary said eventually.
“Take all the time you need, darling. I’m betting Drew’s not going anywhere.”
The next evening Cary came home in a near panic.
“This is getting serious, Kevin,” she said.
“What? What’s getting serious?”
“This thing with Drew. What else would I be talking about?”
“Honey, it may surprise you to hear this, but I don’t constantly think about what you may or may not be doing with Drew. So, what’s the problem now? Did he touch you?”
“Oh, yeah,” she said with a sarcastic snarl.
“He asked to hold my hand again.”
“Come on, Cary. Don’t make me drag it out of you.”
“He took my hand and put my fingers to his lips. He kissed them. Then he took this one right here,” she held up the index finger on her left hand, “and he sucked it into his mouth. He held it there, sucking on it. I could feel his tongue rubbing against it.”
“And you’re upset because of a little finger sucking.”
She looked at him with a face of pure misery. She looked away, down at the floor. “I came.”
“You came. You mean you had an orgasm?”
She nodded silently.
“Not just damp panties this time.”
“No. It was the real thing.”
“This is the first time I ever heard of anybody coming because they had their finger sucked,” he said, trying to suppress a smile.
“You’d better start taking this seriously, Kevin.”
“Why, Cary? You’re in control. All you have to do is tell him to stop. No more conversations about sexual things and no more finger sucking. But, I think you like it. In fact, I think you love it. You want him to come on to you.”
“Why would I want that, Kevin?”
“Because it makes you feel attractive. It makes you feel like a sex goddess. Deep down in your subconscious, I’m betting you were thinking about him getting hard as he sucked on your finger, maybe transferring the sucking to his cock. When you felt his tongue massaging your finger, you probably imagined what it would be like if it was massaging your clit.”
“That’s awful, Kevin!” she cried. “How can you think that about your wife?”
“My wife,” he said gently, “Is still a woman. You’re human, honey. You want to be admired, desirable, adored, even. I told you the other day. It’s perfectly normal.”
“And is it normal for me to want to feel his cock in my mouth; his tongue on my clit, and his cock in my cunt.” Her words were harsh and bitter.
He nodded. “I think it is, Cary.”
“But I don’t want to think that, Kevin. I want to be faithful to you. I want to be desired only by you.”
“Honey, you can’t control who desires you. The only element you can control is how you behave in the face of it.”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Whatever you want to do.”
“You’re not making this any easier. If we weren’t married, I’d probably screw him. But I am married. So I can’t do that.”
“Actually, you can.”
“I’m not cheating on you.”
“That’s right. You’re not.”
“You’re confusing me.”
“Cheating involves deception. If you were trying to deceive me we wouldn’t be having this conversation. You’d just go do it and try to keep it a secret from me.”
“Which I wouldn’t be able to do. I wouldn’t be able to control the guilt.”
“So, let’s do a little experiment. Close your eyes.”
“Just work with me. Close your eyes.”
“All right. They’re closed.”
“Good. I want you to conjure some images in your mind.”
“Okay. You’re lying on your back, naked, with your legs spread wide and Drew’s cock inside you.”
Cary’s eyes popped open. “No!” she said.
“You already did it, Cary. Just close your eyes and see it in your mind.”
“Oh, God!” she wailed.
“How does it make you feel?”
“Bad. I can see it; feel it. But it’s not yours. It’s bad.”
“But it feels good, doesn’t it?”
“I… yes. It feels good, but I’m feeling bad about it.”
“Because of me?”
“Then I want you to look over to your left and see me standing there, smiling at you.”
“Oh! Yes. Okay, I can see you. Why are you smiling?”
“Because I love you and I can see you’re enjoying having Drew inside you.”
“Yes. See me nod and smile at you?”
“Now how do you feel?”
“I feel, oh, God! It feels so good! He’s so hard and so cute. And, Kevin. If you want me to stop all you have to do is say so.”
“Look at me again in your imagination.”
“I am. My eyes haven’t left you.”
“See my lips moving? Can you see me telling you that I love you?”
“God! Yes. You’re letting him fuck me and you’re saying you love me.”
“That’s right. You’re having sex. You like it. I doesn’t change how I love you.”
“Kevin, my love, I feel so full of him and wonderful.”
“Okay, baby. Open your eyes now.”
Cary looked at me. I was smiling just like in her vision.
“You’d let me do that?” she asked. “You wouldn’t be mad?”
“That’s right. Ready to try another image?”
Cary closed her eyes. “Go ahead.”
“Remember when Drew sucked your finger?”
“This time you’re both naked. You’re kneeling in front of him. He has hold of your hand and is sucking your finger.”
“What do you see? What do you want to do?”
“I’m keeling in front of him and he’s naked. I can see his cock. It’s hard, sticking out right in front of me.”
“You want to kiss it, don’t you?”
“You want to take it between your lips, to taste it and feel the hardness on your tongue.”
“Yes. Oh, God! He’s so hard!”
“And it feels good when you press your lips against it?”
“Open your mouth and let your tongue lick it.”
“You like it, don’t you?”
“And you want to take him in your mouth.”
“Open your eyes.”
She could see his eyes sparkling with delight. “I can’t believe this,” she said.
“That my husband is encouraging me to suck another man’s cock.”
“While he sucks your finger,” I reminded her.
“Oh, he let go as soon as I put him in my mouth.”
I laughed. “Okay. One more image.”
“Yes. Close your eyes.”
“You’re kneeling on our bed.”
“I can see that.”
“He’s underneath you. Your lips are at his cock.”
“Oh, yes. Yes.”
“And his hands are around your thighs. He’s pulling you toward his mouth so he can lick your clit.”
“Can you feel his tongue on you?”
“Yes! Oh, God! I want to come!”
“And can you see me?”
“I…no. Where are you?”
“I’ve left you alone. But, I know what’s happening. I’m in the house, but not in the room.”
“Why did you leave me?”
“So you won’t feel self-conscious.”
“It feels good, and I love having his cock in my mouth. I want him to squirt his hot come in my mouth when I come.”
I let her sit with the image in her mind for another quiet minute.
“Open your eyes, Cary.”
She looked at me. “What did you do to me?”
“I just shared the images I had in my mind with you. And you didn’t hate it, did you?”
She shook her head.
“I think you have your answer,” I said softly.
“You’re not going to hate me?”
I smiled. “No, darling. I will love you forever.”
“You think I should fuck him?”
“I think you’ll regret it if you don’t.”
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