Neither, just cool breeze between me and my holy jeans.

Hmmm..a "below job" sounds good for both genders. I'm in the mood for below jobbing. I'll attribute it to my sense of nostalgia.. After all, nostalgia is a seductive liar.

Good thing it doesn't mention the species nor size of the bear, but all things being equal before I find myself in a position to have to kick said bear I would first try massaging his balls and quite possibly giving him a blow job if he demanded it. Then I'd wrestle him down and spank him and reprimand him for being in my apartment.
My test results however indicated otherwise at 46 seconds after a healthy dose of lying. :)

You start fantasizing that at 89 years old there will be thousands of really hot young people will suddenly find elderly people wearing Depends down right sexy.

This couch really isn't big enough and put some clothes on. My grandkids are awake!

Betty Boop.. but she was supplanted by Jessica Rabbit. :-"

And all this time I thought this thread was the RIB cage and I was going to say: Women, you can't live with 'em and you can't stick 'em back in your rib cage. But of course I don't really believe women came from rib cages and my poor deceased mother would have taken a maple switch to my ass for suggesting such.

If I ever meet Noah, I'm going to punch his effing lights out. Don't worry. The ark sank from the weight of the zillion pairs of insects that breed to fast. It got washed down a gully when it first started raining, but for the sake of the holy we pretend otherwise.

Tn Department of Transportation,

Someone please tell me why the fuck you haven't finished the road construction project you started in my hometown 3 YEARS AGO!!! Seriously, it's a flipping 5 mile stretch of road! In a small town with little traffic! Why the hell did the road need to be widened anyway? By the way, that's me swearing and flipping off your workers when they wait until I'm a few feet away then nearly run me over to pull out in front of me. Get it done already and get the fuck out! Because as per GOP: We're broke so your taxes MUST go to filthy rich people before it trickles back down so you can pay taxes on it to finally fix that "private" highway.

what's the big deal about porn? It gves republicans who couldn't get laid in a gay house of ilrepute something to pretend they never look at.

"You've been busy." "I like eating pussy. Jackie's is so sweet." "I bet yours is too." "You know it." Jackie tugged him deeper into the big chair then Maria climbed on top of him with her sweet ass and dark pink folds facing him. He lapped at her juicy cunt as Jackie sucked on his balls letting Maria take his entire rod deep into her thoat. He could feel her throat contract around his...

Added 26 Aug 2012 | Category Group Sex | Votes 1 | Avg Score 4 | Views 1,647

"You sure can sweety, but you're not gonna last through all three." "How do you know?" He felt the blindfold being removed then his eyes adjusted to see a stunningly gorgeous dark woman on top of him. She had waist length, shiny, black hair, beautiful large, firm tits with dark brown nipples, slender waist and as he looked down a soaking wet hairless pussy. Jackie was gently cupping...

Added 26 Aug 2012 | Category Group Sex | Votes 0 | Avg Score 0 | Views 1,588

"She told me and..." she clicked on a cell phone and handed it to him with a picture of Jenny and Fred naked looking right back at him. "It's all over the internet." Andy sat back stunned, but what stunned him more was Fred was overweight by probably 75 pounds. They looked horrible and Fred's dick looked really small. "I better go Jackie." "And do what? Confront her? Demand she end the...

Added 26 Aug 2012 | Category Group Sex | Votes 4 | Avg Score 4.5 | Views 1,507 | 1 Comment

Andy received yet another image in his email account on his cell phone. He was just finishing his day's pile of paper work as usual and as it had happened for the past month he opened it. He felt his blood pressure rise and his face turn red. He glanced around the office and saw no suspicious faces. The usual suspects were gone since management had cleaned house months earlier to get rid...

Added 26 Aug 2012 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 10 | Avg Score 4.5 | Views 2,060 | 5 Comments

Gary hadn't seen Jeff in a long time, it had been since high school. Here it was six years later and they were sitting in a new bar that had just opened not far from home. Jeff hadn't changed much. He was still thin, still had the same long, curly hair and still had the same baby face Gary used to kid him about for looking almost as pretty as Sherry James, Gary's current wife. Jeff had all...

Added 08 Aug 2012 | Category Gay Male | Votes 14 | Avg Score 4.43 | Views 5,214 | 4 Comments

Tazlynn stared at the huge fish tank and thought how nice it would be to take a dip in the lake. She wondered how cold the water was because it was a crater lake formed in a long extinct volcano. She didn't know much about fish, nothing of volcanoes nor what to do with her dead brother, Chet's cabin. Tazlynn was a city girl from Manhattan, but Chet had left New York ten years ago to work...

Added 26 Jul 2012 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 6 | Avg Score 3.83 | Views 1,148

Art sat at the bar slowly rocking to the sad country music playing while he nursed his beer. It would have to be his last one because he'd spent his last dollar. He didn't want to go home to his fat, lazy wife and two whining kids and sure wasn't in the mood to argue. He'd been talking to an older man, well dressed and quite handsome, for some time while counting change hoping the guy might...

Added 19 Jul 2012 | Category Gay Male | Votes 16 | Avg Score 4.69 | Views 6,331 | 4 Comments

Like many men my age I'm a proud grandfather of six and I indeed love them all and my ex wife was a loving, beautiful woman and still is. We raised four great kids together, but there is a part of me none of them knows about and it goes back many years. I go back to high school when I was extremely shy around girls. I wasn't, however shy around guys. I was a good athlete, tall and in...

Added 14 Jul 2012 | Category Bisexual | Votes 6 | Avg Score 4.83 | Views 2,778 | 2 Comments

Beth was bored out of her mind today. It was a hot summer day and the air conditioner was acting up again. Her husband of fifteen years, Roger, was out of town and had the car so Beth had nowhere to go. She was glad he was gone because he'd become a bore and had become intolerably fat for her, and yet she loved him, but they had stopped having sex several years ago. She fanned herself, but...

Added 10 Jul 2012 | Category MILF | Votes 38 | Avg Score 4.72 | Views 12,758 | 5 Comments

Anne loved her new apartment. The movers had taken great care with her stuff and the view from her balcony was wonderful. From her third floor perch she could look out over the other apartments and the city lights beyond. She made coffee even though it was late. She had a few days off work in the engineering department. Sitting on the balcony the soft summer breeze felt wonderful. People...

Added 10 Jul 2012 | Category Oral Sex | Votes 2 | Avg Score 4 | Views 2,787