About RumpleForeskin

Biography

Just your typical run down, beaten down, slapped down, broken down, shot down, hung down, put down, and kicked around old blind porn writer who's been beaten up, tied up, chewed up, blown up, hung up, screwed up, messed up, held up, and told to shut the fuck up.

Name:
Rumple Foreskin
Sex:
Male 
Age:
70
Sign:
Pisces
Relationship Status:
Married
Orientation:
Straight
Location:
Lost in the desert west of Tombstone, AZ , Arizona, United States
Local Time:
19 Sep 2017 06:37
Interests:
recreational sex, writing about sex, thinking about sex, reading about sex, etc.
Favorite Books:
Those written by: William Faulkner Ernest Hemingway John Steinbeck Walter Mosley Alan Furst Elmore Leonard Raymond Chandler P.G. Wodehouse George MacDonald Fraser Kinky Friedman Flannery O'Connor Eudora Welty Walker Percy among others
Favorite Movies:
Primarily comedies: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World Dr. Strangelove Support Your Local Sheriff/Gunfighter The Blues Brothers plus the films of: The Marx Brothers W.C. Fields Woody Allen Mel Brooks
Favorite Music:
Almost anything with the exception of: rap, polka, and a-tonal
Website:

Statistics

Date Joined:
03 Jul 2009
Last Visit:
19 Sep 2017 (1 hour ago)
Page Viewed:
28,310 times
Friends:
75
Followers:
76
Days in Chat:
0
Days on Site:
30+
Forum Posts:
4,138
Stories:
33
Badges:
16

Latest Forum Posts More forum posts »

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Sep 2017 23:36

Laura, I'll have you know I was 23 once. But then I started writing and my IQ fell a couple points. (sigh)

As for something strong to help settle your nerves, what about taking VG's suggestion of an 'Old Fashioned'. They can be lethal and should only be approached with caution along with an alert EMT handy. Want a double?

BTW, I have it on totally unreliable information from a most questionable source that Brown Coffee has a birth mark on her booty that resembles a brown coffee mug. Ya got any info on that burning issue? I tried to check it out for myself using advanced 'Booty Braille' during her birthday paddling but try as I might, no joy...though I did get a few scratches, pinches, bruises and learned some interesting new words. ;)

Anybody else out there want a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Sep 2017 04:41

Odds are it's Monday in your neck of the woods. Sorry about that. Hope our ANZAC's came through the trauma unscathed.

Laura (the First Lady of NZ) wrote: And I know all about the older men liking the vintage thing. I am currently seeing someone who is 25 years my senior, so you know. wink wink.

Oh, please be still my beating heart! There may still be hope for me. But seriously, I didn't know they let teenagers teach school in Kiwi land. ;)

Feel free to pick on Buz today. After his weekend, he'll feel no pain or even notice. His Georgia Bulldogs won on Saturday and his Atlanta Falcons whipped the Packers last night. Not that I'm jealous or envious because LSU and the Saints both lost...nope, not one little bit...honest.

Rumor has it today is the birthday of our Hannah, aka Brown Coffee. I've volunteered to provide bar space, for a nominal fee, to drape her over prior to administering the required number of spanks. Others have offered to pull down anything covering her petite derrier, he says in hideous French. Now someone tell us if the number of strokes is per spanker or spankee?

'Big Bertha is full of caffeinated goodness, and there's also flat beer, stale wine, and fine lickers. "Hannah's' will be available all day for a most reasonable charge. So whadda you Lushland layabouts want?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 17 Sep 2017 19:02

seeker4 wrote:
So we should all drink Hannahs while we spank her little tushie until its red?

Sprite wrote: just in case she objects, i think we should tie her over the bar with her pants down around her ankles.

Me, I wrote: Sounds like a winner to your cranky old barkeep. Tell ya what, as a special present to Hannah on her day, I'll forego charging a rental fee for that bar space.

The Emmy's are still going on and on. Anybody need a drink to help dull the pain?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 17 Sep 2017 06:14

It's morning in the desert north of Tombstone. Here's hoping folks east of the pond are having a, well, whatever they want to have whether they need it or not. And let's all hope our ANZAC's are tucked away in bed sleeping or doing whatever else they might want to be doing.

Laura, if I can find a 'Zoot Suit with a Reet Pleat' can I come along for your next 'Pin-Up' night? I'll even wear a fedora though the long watch chain may be a challenge.

Just for the record, in the opinion of the management and staff of Rumplations, there is no, I say again, NO, reason for anyone to bring up the subject of my 12th ranked LSU Tigers' 37-7 subjugation at the hands of unranked, Mississippi State.

BTW, Burquette has a contest entry that should still be on the main page. "Gutenberg" is, of course, first-rate and strongly recommended.

Big Bertha, the joint's sacred coffee urn, is hot to trot...out a mug of her unique take on coffee. There's some orange juice around for folks into Memosas and Screwdrivers. There's also the usual assortment of unusual 'adult' beverages. So whadda y'all want?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 16 Sep 2017 14:49

Greetings to all laid-back Rumplators, no matter who's on top.

Just for the record, I'm boldly predicting Buz's Bulldogs will get past mighty, Samford, when the two team's meet 'between the hedges' in Athens, Ga. ;)

Now me, I done got a lot of other football games to check out the rest of the day. So if anyone wants a drink from me, order now or hope Mike sobers up or Tawny wakes up. So whadda ya have?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 15 Sep 2017 04:07

It's the weekend in the land of Laura and the hills of Phil. The rest of us can rejoice that it's, TGIF time. Debauch accordingly.

Got a message from our Hannah-unit asking me, bet you'll never guess, if I'm entering the contest. I haven't replied, but then I haven't replied to other recent messages from Larry and Elizabeth Black. To all these messages I now reply...
Larry: many thanks
Ms Elizabet: I feel and share your pain
Hannah: probably

Now about Mike's muddled message, just one question: Can the bookish nerd appear off-stage?

Before I slip off into a second mug full of Big Bertha's hot, coffee-like brew, all Rumplators are encourage to celebrate the birthday of the incredible, Agatha Christie.

Anybody out there want/need/crave/must have coffee,tea, beer, wine, or one of our fine lickers?

:glassses8:

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 14 Sep 2017 16:01

Folks mmust be getting into working on 'Bookish' contest entries. I mean to say, there are more calls for coffee than for beer. Of course, by now, things might have changed. If so...no problem. An earlier order can always be replaced with no additional charge, except for a most nominal toxic waste disposal fee.

And in conclusion, for now, let me just say that Daisy, Shameless and I are now 'friends', probably. Many thanks to them for asking. Congrats to Jeff on having a day off. At least, I think that's Jeff. Did you ever wonder if 'IAmLove is related to 'Lovecraft' the writer? Anyway, here's one Long Island Tea for the, Love-child. And just for Scott, a new beer I found unopened out by the dumpster hot tub, a can of 'Moaning Moose Beer'. The label says it's the beer that made Bullwinkle Moose, Rocky.

Okay, anybody else want a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 14 Sep 2017 06:52

Morning, from the land of the Gila Monsters and Dust Devils.

Just got friend request from DD and Shameless. Guess that qualifies as a 'win some, lose some' event. ;)

What follows is a minor bitch. My problem is with email notifications and some PM's. Sometimes I get 'em, sometimes I don't. Today I got a message about Flirt's request but not one from DD. Just to add to my woes, sometimes the 'reply' link in the request works, but not always. Today was a non-working day.

The situation is even worse over on Stories Space. PM's sent to my friends list are not showing up, which makes pimping stories a real challenge. (sigh)

It is possible all this is due either to my incompetence or to conflicts between my screen reader and the Lush software. Only thing is my screen reader hasn't change and except for growing older and crankier, neither have I.

Anyway, I'm open to suggestions, sympathy,, and other displays of affectionet condolences.

Me, I'm about the have another cup of, Big Bertha's version of coffee. There's cold beer, a new box of wine and many fine lickers awaiting your pleasure. So what'll ya have?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: The Alterverse - Brainstorming.
Posted: 13 Sep 2017 20:29

Just occurred to little ol' moi, that the primo supremo alter-Vista novel was neither sci-fi nor fantasy but was set on a 'real world' island and based on historical reality, "Shogun" by James Clavell.

Of course, if fantasy is your 'thing', then there's this wacko English dude name, Tolkien who might be worth a look-see. ;)


<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 13 Sep 2017 05:24

Happy, Hump Day, I guess.

It's an hour before sunrise out here in the desert...and I'm 'still' awake. (grumble, bitch, moan)

For the baseball fans among us, the Cleveland Indians have now won 20 straight games. That ties the all-time winning streak record in the American League. The non-PC Cleveland club lost to the Cubs in last year's World Series.

Mike is playing with words again. This time it's, arrears. Hannah and the Flirt have sought clarification.

Does anyone still have the link to Sprite's Alter-Island thread. I got in yesterday through the forum page but today I must be doing something wrong.

We got plenty of hot, strong, coffee-like fluids, hot water for tea, some vintage OJ, a platter full of week-old biscuits and sausages, and our usual fine selection of cheap beer, cheaper wine and some of the cheapest lickers in Lushland. So whadda ya want?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">,

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Stories Published By RumpleForeskin All Stories »

A Really Good Mood

With a spray of gravel, the ’66 Chevelle Super Sport sped away from the American Legion parking lot, raced down a narrow, blacktop access road, then slowed imperceptibly before making a tire-squealing right onto the main highway. The car quickly accelerated until it was speeding through the muggy, North Louisiana night. The cherry-red Chevy was always speeding — the only question being by...

Added 12 Jun 2017 | Category Seduction | Votes 22 | Avg Score 5 | Views 5,237 | 19 Comments

Adieu, Alan

His candle burned at both ends, It could not last the night.   But readers and friends all agree, It gave such a marvelous...

Added 26 Mar 2017 | Category Love Poems | Votes 33 | Avg Score 4.81 | Views 497 | 30 Comments

Served Just Right

  They were young, restless, and bored beyond depression. The two nursing students had been in Gwen’s cramped, single-person, dorm room since coming back from supper, smoking and joking, talking about school, men, and life while playing Beatles LP’s, keeping the incense burner going, and steadily draining the bottle of bourbon Mark had left, "for safe keeping," before flying home for a...

Added 09 Feb 2017 | Category Lesbian | Votes 13 | Avg Score 4.92 | Views 7,085 | 8 Comments

A Parting Gift To Remember

From her position draped over the back of an old, stuffed armchair, Lynn felt the fresh load of cum oozing out of her throbbing pussy, working its way through matted pubic hairs, then sliding down trembling inner thighs until it dripped onto the floor.  The thick cream felt cool on her hot, flushed, skin.  With Bob’s help, she struggled to her feet, turned around and hugged him. It had been...

Added 23 Dec 2016 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 22 | Avg Score 5 | Views 2,766 | 17 Comments

What Are Friends For?

She blew in like a pissed off F5 tornado, shouted, "Don't say a fucking thing,” slammed the door shut,and slung her purse across the room. It ricocheted away from my butt-weary couch, cleared off the end table, then teetered briefly at the edge before following the displaced debris onto the floor. Only the reading lamp survived, leaning drunkenly against the wall, shade tilted at a...

Added 20 Aug 2016 | Category Love Stories | Votes 16 | Avg Score 5 | Views 4,091 | 13 Comments

Afternoon Aftermath

For Cindy Davis, it had been a weekend of unbelievable firsts. She had just spent two nights in a mid-town hotel room making almost constant love with Ray, a man she barely knew. Of course, it had been a once-in-a-lifetime experience, no doubt about that. He’d been alone, a long way from home and had needed her. Still, it marked the first time she’d ever cheated on her fiance', which...

Added 21 Apr 2016 | Category Reluctance | Votes 18 | Avg Score 4.89 | Views 10,480 | 10 Comments

Treats First then the Trick

It was a fantastic fuck. Randi Druitt's sex-charged body writhed and shuddered. A large, powerfully built man lay between her widespread legs. With deep, fluid strokes, he pumped his demanding cock in and out of her very willing pussy. Each thrust left her gasping with passion and wanting more. The freckle-faced redhead lay nude on the backseat of an old Buick, parked on the far side of a...

Added 21 Oct 2015 | Category Cheating | Votes 12 | Avg Score 5 | Views 7,132 | 7 Comments

Recommended Read Getting A Lot Of What She Wants

The thick, glistening shaft slipped from Cindy’s mouth like a long, sexy serpent. When the swollen cockhead came into view, she lapped at its smooth surface while glancing up at her husband. Ray’s big, nude body was sprawled comfortably on their living room couch. Curly blonde hair cushioned his head against the wall. Those blue eyes she adored so much were shut. His lips were parted. It...

Added 28 Sep 2015 | Category Fetish | Votes 15 | Avg Score 5 | Views 6,572 | 17 Comments

Of Love and War and Donna Lynn

It was another turbulent day in the summer of 68. Student protests raged from the Sorbonne to Berkeley. In the US, civil rights demonstrations and anti-war rallies were turning violent. Martin Luther King was dead; Bobby Kennedy would be soon. In South Vietnam, hundreds of other Americans were being killed each month. Soldiers patrolled the streets of Saigon, Paris, and Washington while...

Added 31 Aug 2015 | Category Historical | Votes 19 | Avg Score 4.84 | Views 2,162 | 17 Comments

A Different Sort of Cramming

Textbooks and study notes showered down from the bouncing mattress of a venerable four-poster bed as a long, thick, column of rigid flesh kept up a steady rhythm of lust and need, surging back and forth past stretched, slightly irritated pussy lips that clutch tightly around the unyielding shaft relentlessly cramming its engorged cock head into the inner most depths of a wet, stuffed...

Added 27 Aug 2015 | Category Quickie Sex | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 8,508 | 5 Comments

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Friends Comments


Lauradj
Posted: 18 Sep 2017 23:58
Thanks for the add!

Denim_Daisy10
Posted: 14 Sep 2017 08:42

Simmerdownchick
Posted: 06 Sep 2017 18:44

Wilful
Posted: 12 Aug 2017 19:54
Thanks for the add, Mate. I hope you're having an awesome weekend. All the best.

TonyaL
Posted: 11 Aug 2017 06:18
I am honored to be your friend.

ChuckEPoo
Posted: 27 Jul 2017 17:53

elizabethblack
Posted: 22 Jul 2017 16:15
So wonderful to have you writing and visiting SS!1 Adds to the class of the place. (giggle)


Simmerdownchick
Posted: 08 Jul 2017 16:42

Simplicity
Posted: 13 Jun 2017 05:56

browncoffee
Posted: 12 Jun 2017 01:18

Simplicity
Posted: 09 Jun 2017 10:10

Simplicity
Posted: 04 Jun 2017 13:05
Thank you for the add..

Buz
Posted: 19 May 2017 21:13

browncoffee
Posted: 27 Apr 2017 06:23

elizabethblack
Posted: 15 Apr 2017 21:08
Love Bessie Smith - thanks for the reminder

Simmerdownchick
Posted: 13 Apr 2017 22:49



Simmerdownchick
Posted: 27 Mar 2017 17:36
Lilly
Posted: 17 Mar 2017 16:42

biggym
Posted: 17 Mar 2017 03:10
Happy Happy Birthday!!! Know it will be a naughty fun day. Stay naked and hard. Enjoy and smile.
Lush
Posted: 17 Mar 2017 00:20
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.
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