About RumpleForeskin

Just your typical run down, beaten down, slapped down, broken down, shot down, hung down, put down, and kicked around old blind porn writer who's been beaten up, tied up, chewed up, blown up, hung up, screwed up, messed up, held up, and told to shut the fuck up.

Rumple Foreskin
Relationship Status:
Lost in the ozone west of the Pecos, Arizona, United States
recreational sex, writing about sex, thinking about sex, reading about sex, etc.
Favorite Books:
Those written by: William Faulkner Ernest Hemingway John Steinbeck Walter Mosley Alan Furst Elmore Leonard Raymond Chandler P.G. Wodehouse George MacDonald Fraser Kinky Friedman Flannery O'Connor Eudora Welty Walker Percy among others
Favorite Movies:
Primarily comedies: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World Dr. Strangelove Support Your Local Sheriff/Gunfighter The Blues Brothers plus the films of: The Marx Brothers W.C. Fields Woody Allen Mel Brooks
Favorite Music:
Almost anything with the exception of: rap, polka, and a-tonal
Date Joined:
03 Jul 2009
Last Visit:
24 Jul 2016 (11 minutes ago)
Page Viewed:
24,845 times
Days in Chat:
Days on Site:
Forum Posts:
Latest Forum Posts
Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 22 Jul 2016 23:41

Hi ya, Doc. Just opened a new case of, Tokilla Mockingbird Tequila. And before you ask, yes, there is a worm or two in the bottom of the bottle, along with some other odds and ends. I'd advise against straight shooters. Last person to try that is now sitting over there with Coma and Tose at the 'One Too Many' table. Still, you probably have some IQ to spare; so what'll it be?

Keep on keeping on in SD.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 22 Jul 2016 20:50

Greetings, Gil. Ah, memories of wet t-shirts past. ;)

If Long Island Tea isn't your thing, what about a, Mint Julip? I think we've got some mint left over from the, 'Derby Days Drunken Debauch.'

And speaking of drunken debauches, Verbal's latest Shards'', an erotic tale of online shopping (honest), is now on the main page. For once, I remembered to copy a link to post here. With luck, it might accidentally work.


Okay, who's next?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 22 Jul 2016 09:14

Here ya go, Seeker. A pint of our best, okay, make that our only, ale.

BTW, no question that t-shirt is a classic, but so was its contents.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 21 Jul 2016 19:49

Greetings, Gil. What about a tall, cool, Long Island Tea? And if you spill any on your chest, well... .

Your mentioning a wet t-shirt contest reminded me of a visual that left a most favorable, and lasting, impression on me. In the film, "The Deep" Jacqueline Bisset, wore a very thin and very wet, t-shirt. Don't recall anything about the film except, of course, for Ms Bissett's screen presence. ;)

Ready for a refill?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 20 Jul 2016 23:00

Greetings, dwellers in the, Land of Lush. (sips on a mug of thick Louisiana coffee fortified with a dose of, Beaver Breath Brandy) In case y'all missed the big news, Lush has just cranked up another writing contest. Max word count is 5k, deadline is August 30, top prize is $150.00.. Stories should have a 'sports' thene.

Now this is just my opinion, you understand, but I'm thinking a drunken game of strip poker is not exactly what Nicola (aka: she who must be obeyed) has in mind. On the other hand,, I'm wondering what the record is for the most miles covered during a sex session in the back seat of a moving car. ;)

BTW, we got a half-empty box of doughnut holes someone left out back by the dumpster hot tub. Give 'em a try. I'm told that Norovirus is a big hit among staffers at the RNC in Cleveland.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Jul 2016 19:09

Okay, one quart of 'Tequila Mockingbird' and a loose joint that may or may not be oregano, for Seeker.

And for our high flying Dr. V, one double palliative on the rocks.

So what do the rest of you cheapskates want?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Jul 2016 10:29


― Something that will make me write like Hunter S. Thompson.<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/regaeman.gif" alt="Regaeman Man">
Okay, Seeker, if you insist. Here's the HST menu from "Fear and Loathing in LV"

“We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls.
Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.”

So what'll ya have?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Jul 2016 06:30

Greetings, Lushlanders. It strikes me as one of those great, cosmic coincidences that today marks the first day of the GOP convention and the birthday of the great American who said: “I hate to advocate for drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone … but they’ve always worked for me.”

That's right, on this day in history, the inspiration for 'Uncle Duke' in the Doonsbury comic strip and notorious gonzo journalist, Hunter S. Thompson, emerged into a world that may never be ready for someone like him.

So what'll y'all have to drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 13 Jul 2016 14:51

Greetings, Lushlanders. Has anyone made any sort of contact with Mike (aka OceanRunner). After he ordered Guinness on the rocks last night, I've been worried some rag-tag IRA hold outs may be gunning for him. (sigh)

There is some good news, however. Verbal has just posted his latest 'Shards' flash fiction piece. IM (very humble) O, it's one of the best. I'd post a link but I forgot to and I'm way too lazy to go back for one. Still it should be on the main page for the rest of the day.

By the way, just in case anyone is wondering: If either Clinton or Trump asks me to be their Vice-Presidential candidate, I'd make like Gen. Sherman and refuse to either run, or if elected, serve.

So what'll you deadbeats have to drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 12 Jul 2016 18:36

Guinness...on the rocks? Isn't that, you know, sacriligious? I mean, isn't there a danger some IRA splinter group will be coming for you to have an 'up close and personal' discussion about Irish pride and drinking beer that's the temperature of warm spit?

Still, I have a bottle left over from last St. Patrick's day so why not? Just, if you don't mind, please pay when served. ;)

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

back to top
Stories Published By RumpleForeskin
Afternoon Aftermath

For Cindy Davis, it had been a weekend of unbelievable firsts. She had just spent two nights in a mid-town hotel room making almost constant love with Ray, a man she barely knew. Of course, it had been a once-in-a-lifetime experience, no doubt about that. He’d been alone, a long way from home and had needed her. Still, it marked the first time she’d ever cheated on her fiance', which...

Added 21 Apr 2016 | Category Reluctance | Votes 16 | Avg Score 4.88 | Views 7,666 | 9 Comments

Treats First then the Trick

It was a fantastic fuck. Randi Druitt's sex-charged body writhed and shuddered. A large, powerfully built man lay between her widespread legs. With deep, fluid strokes, he pumped his demanding cock in and out of her very willing pussy. Each thrust left her gasping with passion and wanting more. The freckle-faced redhead lay nude on the backseat of an old Buick, parked on the far side of a...

Added 21 Oct 2015 | Category Cheating | Votes 11 | Avg Score 5 | Views 6,108 | 7 Comments

Recommended Read Getting A Lot Of What She Wants

The thick, glistening shaft slipped from Cindy’s mouth like a long, sexy serpent. When the swollen cockhead came into view, she lapped at its smooth surface while glancing up at her husband. Ray’s big, nude body was sprawled comfortably on their living room couch. Curly blonde hair cushioned his head against the wall. Those blue eyes she adored so much were shut. His lips were parted. It...

Added 28 Sep 2015 | Category Fetish | Votes 14 | Avg Score 5 | Views 5,310 | 15 Comments

Of Love and War and Donna Lynn

It was another turbulent day in the summer of 68. Student protests raged from the Sorbonne to Berkeley. In the US, civil rights demonstrations and anti-war rallies were turning violent. Martin Luther King was dead; Bobby Kennedy would be soon. In South Vietnam, hundreds of other Americans were being killed each month. Soldiers patrolled the streets of Saigon, Paris, and Washington while...

Added 31 Aug 2015 | Category Historical | Votes 18 | Avg Score 4.83 | Views 1,384 | 17 Comments

A Different Sort of Cramming

Textbooks and study notes showered down from the bouncing mattress of a venerable four-poster bed as a long, thick, column of rigid flesh kept up a steady rhythm of lust and need, surging back and forth past stretched, slightly irritated pussy lips that clutch tightly around the unyielding shaft relentlessly cramming its engorged cock head into the inner most depths of a wet, stuffed...

Added 27 Aug 2015 | Category Quickie Sex | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 7,689 | 6 Comments

Feels So Right It Can’t Be Wrong: chapter 3

Kelly woke in her stepbrother’s bed cuddled next to his nude body. The sheet barely covered his morning erection. She thought about teasing him awake, it struck her as the big-sisterly thing to do, but then rolled onto her back, stretched, and immediately dozed off and slipped into yet another rerun of her dreams. Like most of those she’d had recently, they involved sex. Unlike the...

Added 30 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 17 | Avg Score 5 | Views 21,318 | 9 Comments

Feels So Right, It Can’t Be Wrong: Chapter 2

After a lot of poking, prodding, and teasing, the stepsiblings managed to disentangle and get off Jason’s bed. Before he could pull Kelly out of the room, however, she noticed the sheets. “Whoa. Halt. Stop. Sorry, but those sheets have got to go.” Jason protested but she remained adamant as only a somewhat fastidious big sister can be and began stripping the bed. Perhaps it was seeing her...

Added 27 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 13 | Avg Score 4.92 | Views 20,820 | 6 Comments

Feels So Right, It Can’t Be Wrong: Chapter 1

Horny, nervous, and half-naked, Kelly Layton peeked through the open bedroom door. Inside, her kid brother, make that her kid stepbrother, lay stretched out on his unmade bed, reading a paperback. But he’s no kid, thought Kelly. Not anymore. Though still just eighteen, with his athletic build, dark hair, eyes the same steel-gray as his father’s, and a smile that could get him laid in...

Added 25 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 21 | Avg Score 5 | Views 40,380 | 7 Comments


The old-style Checker cab inched away from the congested airport loading zone,then pulled out into the cold, rainy January evening and headed for a downtown hotel. Inside, Gwen studied Mark's face. For all she knew, he might have found someone special while back home. Hesitantly, even shyly, she asked, "Did you miss me?” Mark nodded, "You were all I could think about on the flight up....

Added 30 Mar 2014 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 19 | Avg Score 4.74 | Views 4,724 | 14 Comments

Compare and Contrast

After what she insisted would be a once-in-a-lifetime weekend spent making love with Mark Cahill, her ‘other’ man, the one who wasn’t her fiance’, Gwen had promised both herself and her friends it would never happen again. Her friends were openly skeptical. Her friends were right. Despite Gwen’s best intentions, the long weekend she spent with Mark wasn’t a one-time event, but the beginning...

Added 08 Feb 2014 | Category Oral Sex | Votes 7 | Avg Score 4.86 | Views 5,335 | 4 Comments

Image Gallery
Image Gallery
4 Images
Video Gallery
Video Gallery
6 Videos
Friends Comments
Friends Comments

Posted: 02 Jul 2016 20:08

Posted: 31 May 2016 14:47
Your honky tonk can use an upgrade, chief...

Posted: 13 May 2016 15:03
I never thought of making them into necklaces. I'll have to give it a try.

Posted: 16 Apr 2016 20:44

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 17:41
Waiting for my drink and more umbrellas.

Posted: 26 Mar 2016 22:43

Posted: 26 Mar 2016 20:29
Happy Easter and Congratulations, but keep those tears dried away

Posted: 25 Mar 2016 21:29
I'm pretty sure she'd win the contest. I'll just keep drinking.

Posted: 21 Mar 2016 17:02
Can't decide if I should go out back to the dumpster. I think I'll drink inside for awhile.
Posted: 17 Mar 2016 00:20
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.

Posted: 16 Mar 2016 17:13
Happy Happy Birthday!!! Know it will be a naughty day. Stay naked and hard. Enjoy.

Posted: 02 Mar 2016 20:16

Posted: 14 Feb 2016 19:37
Have a great Valentine weekend

Posted: 23 Dec 2015 16:06
Merry Christmas, Rumpy!

Posted: 07 Dec 2015 20:28

Posted: 31 Oct 2015 08:13

Posted: 14 Sep 2015 19:20
Thank you for celebrating my birthday with me.

Posted: 27 Aug 2015 11:45
Thanks for adding me........

Posted: 27 Aug 2015 10:29

Posted: 17 Mar 2015 17:37
back to top

Attach a note to this member, which only you can see.

Tell us why

Please tell us why you think this profile page is inappropriate.