Forum posts made by rumpleforeskin

Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 18 Oct 2017 12:28

There's a kind of Lush, all over the worl. Sorry about that. Just channeling my inner Herman's Hermits.

Scott, mega-congrats on reaching the exaulted realm of 'veteran-hood. Maybe when Mike and a few other qualify, we can organize our own, VLW (Veterans of Lush World) post.

Larry, here's your coffee. Sorry about the slow service. I could give a long, pointless, rambling and, at most, only semi-true excuse, but I'll leave that to our Commander-in-Chief.

Jeff, glad I am the 'Shards' series is only going on vacation instead of leaving Lushland for good. Keep us posted on your new venture (will it have boobs?)

Now don't everyone start pushing and shoving to be first in line, but the bar really is open for business. So what'll y'all have?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 17 Oct 2017 20:26

Shampain cocktails for Gil, Ms Elizabet, and Tanya. Knock back a couple of those and we'll get down to some serious drinking, complete with cocktail umbrellas, of course.. ;)

Anybody else want to join in?


Topic Post a random fact
Posted 17 Oct 2017 19:48

Common sense,--ain't.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 17 Oct 2017 19:42

WAHOO! Apollo is back among the mortals And now, thanks to the thoughtfulness of your family, after he finishes at the vet, it'll be time to go shopping for new cat stuf!

So who's ready to order a big, pricey drink to celebrate Tanya's great news and Gil's almost as great, news.


Topic The Slimeball-in-Chief Strikes Again
Posted 17 Oct 2017 18:01

This 'suggested read' is dedicated to anyone out there who still supports President Trump and defends his actions.


WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump has pulled bereaved military families into a painful political fight of his own making, going so far Tuesday as to cite the death of his chief of staff's son in Afghanistan to question whether Barack Obama and other presidents did enough to honor the military dead. He's boasted that "I think I've called every family of someone who's died," though The Associated Press found relatives of two soldiers who died overseas during Trump's presidency who said they never received a call or a letter from him, as well as relatives of a third who did not get a call from him. The White House said Trump did telephone on Tuesday the families of four soldiers who were killed in Niger nearly two weeks ago, the issue that had spawned the controversy this week. "He offered condolences on behalf of a grateful nation and assured them their family's extraordinary sacrifice to the country will never be forgotten," said a White House statement. Contending that Trump's propensity for a political fight has drifted into "sacred" territory, Democrats and some former government officials have expressed anger at his comments that he, almost alone among presidents, called the families of military members killed in war. They accused him of "inane cruelty" and a "sick game." For their part, Gold Star families, which have lost members in wartime, told AP of acts of intimate kindness from two presidents - Obama and George W. Bush - when those commanders in chief consoled them. Trump's posture has been defensive in recent days after he was criticized for not reaching out right away to relatives of the soldiers killed in Niger. On Monday, Trump said he'd written letters that hadn't yet been mailed; his aides they had been awaiting information on the soldiers before proceeding. Then Trump stirred things further Tuesday on Fox News radio, saying, "You could ask General Kelly, did he get a call from Obama?" John Kelly, a Marine general under Obama, is Trump's chief of staff. His son, Marine 2nd Lt. Robert Kelly, was killed in Afghanistan in 2010. John Kelly was not seen at Trump's public events Tuesday. A White House official said Obama did not call Kelly after his son's death but did not say whether the former president reached out in some other fashion. White House visitor records show Kelly attended a breakfast Obama hosted for Gold Star families six months after his son died. A person familiar with the breakfast - speaking on condition of anonymity because the event was private - said the Kelly family sat at Michelle Obama's table. Obama aides said it was difficult this many years later to determine if he had also called Kelly, or when. Former Obama spokesman Ned Price tweeted: "Kelly, a man of honor & decency, should stop this inane cruelty. He saw up-close just how - & how much - Obama cared for the fallen's families." Democratic Sen. Tammy Duckworth of Illinois, an Iraq veteran who lost both legs when her helicopter was attacked, said Obama did right by the fallen. "I just wish that this commander in chief would stop using Gold Star families as pawns in whatever sick game he's trying to play here," she said. And retired Gen. Martin E. Dempsey, once chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, tweeted that Bush, Obama and their wives "cared deeply, worked tirelessly for the serving, the fallen, and their families. Not politics. Sacred Trust." Trump initially claimed, in a news conference Monday, that only he among presidents made sure to call families. Obama may have done so on occasion, he said, but "other presidents did not call." He equivocated Tuesday as the record made plain that his characterization was false. "I don't know," he said of past calls. But he said his own practice was to call all families of the war dead. But that hasn't happened:
* the article gave several examples of Trump 'no contacts'. This is just one of them.

Army Spc. Christopher Michael Harris, 25, of Jackson Springs, North Carolina, was killed along with another soldier in a suicide attack in Afghanistan in August. His widow, Brittany Harris, said the White House did offer to set up a call with Trump but "it fell through" and no letter came from the president. She figured Trump was too busy with the approach of Hurricane Harvey and North Korea woes. The family, though, saw Vice President Mike Pence at Dover Air Force Base, where they went to receive Michael's remains, and found Pence's words comforting. Now 17 weeks pregnant, Brittany Harris said she's had an outpouring of support from the Pentagon and others in government, handwritten notes from Defense Secretary James Mattis and many others. "Everybody treats me like gold, salutes me, takes off their hats for me," she said.

Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 17 Oct 2017 16:57

For our English Night Owl, a mug of hot tea to smooth her into the land of nod.

For Mike, who claims he'll pay for his next beer, his next beer.

DD, one Jack and Coke. I'll add it to Mike's tab.

Tanya, here's hoping your nerves have begun to settle down a bit. You need a stiff one, drink wise, or something a bit, you know, softer?

What about the rest of you scribblers of seedy slime and smut. (Fooled y'all with a compliment, didn't I? )


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 17 Oct 2017 12:36

Howdy, honeys and hombres, and anyone inbetween...or vice versa.

Was going to open with a recitation of the woes that beset the thread the last two evenings (USA time) but that issue pales into, not just insignificance but invisibility in light of Tanya's trauma. Many hugs and much shared relief over what happened and the outcome.

total aside: Back in my driving days, I found 'deer whistles' very effective. Anyone living in areas with a lot of deer, should give them or something similar, a careful look.

Okay, enough seriousness. By the non-existent power granted to him by no one in particular, the 'Right Rev of Lush has just proclaimed it 'Cocktail Hour' all over the world. So whadda ya want?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 16 Oct 2017 15:40

Mike wrote: a theme based on a body part is tough. When I see a woman, I see a whole. (I hope I spelled that right)

Me, I wrote: Not sure, but did you mean to write, '...I see a whole lot of loving'?

Anyway, here's you a beer in case things get a bit hot for you.

Larry, you got an iced tea coming your way. How are things out Kansas way?

If I can ever break away from this joint, I'll be submitting the next-to-the-last chapter of my 'Dancing to Ray Charles' series over on Stories have been warned. ;)

Okay, we're still open for business, or what passes for that around here. So whadda ya want to, you know, drink?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 16 Oct 2017 15:19

What we got here is, failure to consume...immoderately, that is.

To aid in the bar's ongoing mission to provide relief from (ADS) 'Alcohol Depravation Syndrome' we done got:

four double-shots of 'Tarantula Tequila' (Terance's fav) for DD and Jeff.

A 'virgin' Hannah and another one made with Verisimilitude Vodka, for Tanya.

Hot chocolate for hard-writing, Hannah.

Is it just me, or is anyone else having trouble coming up with a story idea featuring 'boobs'?

Tell y'all what, go ahead and order something to drink and, if you actually pay for the sucker, I won't yell at you or, even worse, tell war stories. So whadda ya want?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 16 Oct 2017 10:33

Greetings. Those feeling 'The Mondays' should scroll up and click on the music link in Phil's post. It's LOL funny and reminded me a bit of something Randy Newman or Tom Lehrer might create.

The 'Boobies' contest made me wish 'Size Queen' was still posting here. Her send-ups of sexy women with impossibly enormous boobs were an absolute hoot.

Not sure if Gav or some kind hearted mod fixed my bottom of posts' problem or time healed the glitch. But thanks to whomever or whatever fixed things

There are orders for booze, coffee, and tea from the riff-raff, and a Bloody Mary by Nic. Got y'all covered. What about the rest of you Monday moaners? Ya want something to drink or do you plan on just hanging around and replaying Phil's music link?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 20:42

That okay, Love. It was a bracing experience. ;)

Just so y'all know, I must have done something to my settings 'cause suddenly I cannot, I say again, CAN NOT, add that smilie with sunglasses I've been signing off with for a long, long time. Can't figure out what I did wrong, but maybe Gav can get me squared away. (imagine a smilie wearing sunglasses) ;)


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 20:26

Our 'Love Child' hits another homerThanks for the kind offer. . I'll join Buz in a 'heading for bed before long, beer. That way I'll sleep like a baby...waking up several times during the night to pee.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 20:00

The Mad-One's thoughts on the head football coach at Missouri got me to wondering if his folks and some of the beleaguered Tennessee fans might want to consider an even swap of head coaches. If things keep going downhill in the Ozarks, Arkansas might become interested in turning that into a three-way swap session.

Just a thought.

And seriously, my sincere thanks to Mad, Buz and the incomparable Curvy for their ego-stroking kind comments about my writing and contest entry

Remind me to buy y'all a drink, sooner or later. And what about the rest of you escapees from the realm of reality? Whadda ya wanna drink?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 17:22

The Rumplations' Monoco

grenadine - amount depends on the sweetness desired
beer (lager)
soda: Sprite is, of course, the preferred choice

There are approximately a jillion variations, give or take a kazillion or two. either the beer or soda can be replaced by a favorite fruit juice. The beer can also be replaced by vodka.

The original 'Rumplations Hanna' was, of course, a virgin drink (no alcohol, if you must ask) Best I recall, VG was the first to ask for vodka instead of beer.

Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it...unless somebody wipes off the damn bar.

Any drink orders? This is, or was, a bar, after all.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 14:01

VG, how's about a double 'Gorilla Killah'? They got Gil through her vale of tears.

Scott, here's you a slightly less lethal Rum and Coke.

Nic, finally got that snifter cleaned out. Afraid the only thing resembling cognac we can offer is 'Beaver Breath Brandy'. Best I can say about the stuff, besides it being cheap, is no one ever complains after giving it a try.

Rejoice and shout, 'Hallelujah! The Saints wwin their third straight game, beating Detroit, 52-38 in a non-defensive struggle for the ages. ;)

eta: Your Attention Pa-lease:

Jamal's Back!
"Little Black Dress"
Check it out.

So the Saints win,
my LSU Tigers win, Buz's Bulldogs win and I finally got an 'honorable mention' in a Lush contest. Let's have a ball. Let's have a party, you all. :)


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 11:20

"She who must be obeyed' has come and, presumably, gone. Uh, Nic, about your knid offer of cognac in a snifter, well, ya see, there's only one in the place but I'll be happy to clean it out for you. ;)

Just so y'all know, here's the complete list of 'runner ups':

Runners Up:

A Life Half-lived, by TheTravellingMan
A Bookish Love Story, by RumpleForeskin
Applied Literature, by LYFBUZ
Rooftop Dreams, by MadMartigan
Balls Head, by PhilU
Delete, Rewrite, by Saucymh
Paris Palimpsest, by LeCygneNoir
Strange Flesh, by Varrick
The Grimoire - My Inheritance, by ChrisM

Told y'all I was really and truly on the list, right along with a bunch of writers who actually should have been there.

So what'll you winners and losers and non-combatants have to drink?

Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 10:38


we're going from books to 'Boobies'.

This is a special contest, all prize money will be given to breast cancer research. The top three finishers will have their status upgraded one level. There's no special word limit and the deadline is Nov. 19th.

All the rules, regulations, and other related odds and ends can be found on the 'Competition' page. Check it out.

Anybody ready for a refill?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 15 Oct 2017 10:30

Mega-congrats to Burquette for her much-deserved first-place finish. :)

Like others, I had Mike's entry on my top five list. Of course I also had VG tied with Burquette for first place. IMO, it's seems obvious VG excellent entry which richly deserves an 'Editor's Pick' (EP) designation, fell victum to the 'failure to follow the theme' regulation. For in all immodesty, my story ain't bad, but VG's was much, much better.

Now on to something really important, my making the 'runner-up' list.

Just for the record, I've been lucky enough to have a contest winner, a couple EP's and even one 'RR',but this is my first-ever finish on that hallowed list. BTW, is it still 'honorable mention' or is it now 'runner-up'? Need to know for my sig line.

All thanks for that break-through goes to the mis-guided judges, of course. ;) But most of all, my thanks and free drinks go to Wanna deWordsmith who went above and beyond the call of mod duty to lend my poor prose much needed assistance.

And now for the REALLY big news. There's already a new contest open to one and all. I'll post some info in the next post to give everyone time to order, consume and re-order drinks. So whadda ya want?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 14 Oct 2017 21:34

Thanks for the congrats, DD. The Arizona schools also had or are having good nights. Arizona whipped UCLA while Arizona State is leading Washington 13-0 at the half.

Who is VaTech facing next week?

And in conclusion, here's you a Jack and Coke. Anybody else out there want a nightcap?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 14 Oct 2017 17:50

In the immortal words of, James Brown 'The Godfather of Soul'


My LSU Tigers came back from a 0-20 deficit verses 10th ranked Auburn, to win, 27-23.

To celebrate the team's come-from-behind win, all drinks tonight will be on...Seeker...following his snide sneer at US college football. Sneer not, Scott, lest ye be snided.

BUT, (please notice that's a big but or butt as the case may be) Buz's undefeated and top ten ranked Georgia Bulldogs are tied, 21-21 verses lowly Missouri early in the 2nd quarter. How Buz must be reacting to this potentially horrendous situation is best not imagined.

So what drink(s) do you want Scott to pay for?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 14 Oct 2017 14:39

Afternoon, Tanya. What about a tequila sunrise with the shot of tequila on the side?

Adi, here's your ginger ale. Sometime ya gotta try a 'Hannah'. There are versions with and others without, booze, that is. If you need more info, check with, Brown Coffee.

Okay, my Bayou Bengals are getting their butts whipped by Auburn, 23-14 at halftime. Could be worse. At one point they trailed, 17-0. But the bottom line is me, I'm not a happy camper. So just gimmie your orders not your BS.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 14 Oct 2017 12:48

Afternoon, Scott. Thanks for finishing off that last bit of skunky beer. I swear, on a stack of Victoria's Secrets catalogs that I left a post this morning...had to do with everyone being comatose, including Coma and Tose. (sigh)

Anyway, the LSU game is about to start so I'll check in about three hours from now, give or take an overtime or two.

If you got an order, give it to the Seeker-unit.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 13 Oct 2017 17:23

Lyf, what about a 'Gorilla Killah' like the ones Gil's been guzzling? That's a double-shot of 151 proof rum with a hint of Cola and a cocktail umbrella or two.

DD, hugs are even better than tips, not that any tips have come my way. ;)

Gil, just ask Coma and Tose to scoot up a bit so you can snuggle into the Throne Corner with those other three inebriants.

BTW, isn't tomorrow supposed to be the big contest announcement day?

Anybody out there want anything to drink? Just wondering.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 13 Oct 2017 15:16

Hannah must be bucking for the next 'Mod of the Month' (won this time by, Saucy) since she's spending her TGIF evening reading comp least that's what she claims to be doing. ;) Anyway, here's some of Big Bertha's evening brew.

Seeker, sorry about that headache. Had to look it up, but here's your, 'Virgin Caesar'.

K.O. Heart and I are now 'friends'. That means her next drink is on...Verbal.

Gil, here's ya another 'Gorilla Killah with five cocktail umbrellas.

DD, I'm not sure, but odds are ya want a Jack and Coke, so here you go.

As for the Unholy Trinity of: Sprite, Emily, and our Love Child, judging by the lewd comments, salacious snickers and gasps of...something or other...they're having way too damn much fun over in the corner throne room.

Anybody else care to join them in drinking to, you know, excess? I mean,somebody has to take up the slack for Larry, Jeff and Scott...besides, Gil, that is. So whadda ya Lush-heads wanna drink?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 13 Oct 2017 10:06

It's Friday the 13th, but with Trump in the White House, that date no longer seems especially ominous.

This place is turning into a dang detox center what with all the orders for tea, coffee and even, may the ghost of W.C. Fields' forgive us, water. Bless Gill and her broken heart. If not for her needs, dust might be collecting on the bottle of rum.

While best wishes go out to all those recovering in mind and body, here's hoping all Rumplators have a tolerable weekend.

Dare I ask if anyone wants to order a drink?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 12 Oct 2017 20:18

Boy O Boy-R-Dee, this crowd is suffering: missing cats, bad backs, and mis-located mutts. Hell's bells, even getting drunk and screwing like wild weasels is limited by Tanya's back, Jeff's tests, and my being way too pure of heart for that sort of activity.

But in the 'do what ya gotta do' category, here's some aqua for, Jeff, our 'Water Brother', some Ben-Gay and strong dope for Tanya, a mug of hot tea for, dog-gone-no-more, Larry,and a bunch of Gorilla Killah's for Gil and all thos wanting to show their sympathy with her in this current misery.

And if that's not enough for you, well,Make yourself useful and play some Tom Petty on the jukebox then go sit with Coma and Tose, but don't disturb them.


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 12 Oct 2017 12:33

Coffee for DD, and it's in a relatively clean mug. ;)


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 12 Oct 2017 11:41

Howdy, Mustang 67 (mine was a '65). Here's a heart-felt 'way to go' for bravely carrying on...well, in this case, it's the tradition of sound, if not particularly sober, scientific research here at Rumplations. If there's a need for some 'hands on' work, I'm your blind barkeep for the job. Here's your beer.

Gil, here's you a double 'Gorilla Killah' complete with the cherry half I found in a can of fruit cocktail,and three cocktail umbrellas.

So what do the rest of you 'cat house' refugees want, to drink that is?


Topic RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted 11 Oct 2017 18:47

Tanya, I left a 'Happy Birthday' to, Pumky. Here's your Hannah. I made it a double sense Ping is springing, so to speak, for the tab.

Ping, ya wanna make that rum and Coke a 'Gorilla Killah'? (double-shot of 151 proof rum with a miniscule splash of Coke.)

Scott, here's a double-shot of 'Old Haggis Scotch', imported all the way from, Scotsdale, AZ.. Enjoy.

Buz, Maker's Mark is one high-toned bourbon. I'll be glad to join you in sipping some if you're bringing the bottle. ;)

Sprite and the Mad-Man didn't leave orders, so I'll put together a couple 'Gorilla Killah's' just for them.

Belly up to the bar folks, whether yours is an outta or an inney. Let's celebrate making it through another day of the Trump mis-administration. Wahoo!


Topic Help me wish punky (punkycalam) a very happy birthday
Posted 11 Oct 2017 18:32

Don't sweat it being your birthday, Punky. That sort of thing has been known to happen in even the best of families. :)