Forum posts made by dancing_doll

Topic Is my boyfriend not attracted to me anymore?
Posted 05 Aug 2011 16:47

Since i don't know what you really look like (or what he looks like), physical attraction could be part of the problem. More so if you've made any major changes from when you first started dating or are no longer trying. Like if mini-skirts and push-up bras were what you wore when you first met, and now the no make-up/sweatpants look is the new staple or if you've had any major weight gains over the past couple of years. Yes, these things are superficial, but let's face it... some guys are superficial!

Are you doing things to try to initiate sex or entice him? If you're making efforts and he's rejecting you, then yes... I would be strongly concerned that he's getting it elsewhere.

I've heard the whole "he's stressed out" thing before and I don't buy it. Either there's a medical reason for his low sex-drive, he's bored/complacent because you've been in a relationship for a few years now, or he's already playing somewhere else.

I would actively start trying to initiate sex, and if he rebuffs you, then you need to talk about what is going on. As Shibui already said... communication is key. It's better to know now than to waste more years with the wrong guy.

Sorry if my post sounds a bit harsh, but there's no reason in sugar-coating things and advocating that you ignore red flags and stay in a relationship that isn't satisfying you or making you happy. I wish some of my friends had taken this approach during the last year I spent with my ex-bf rather than reassuring me and convincing me to overlook things.

The bottom line in this case is: Not wanting to have sex is a major red flag.

Topic Today in Pictures (post a picture representing your mood)
Posted 05 Aug 2011 15:18

Topic Psychology of BDSM.
Posted 05 Aug 2011 09:59

Oh Felix... you totally deserve an Editor's Choice ribbon for that forum post. Brilliant!

Topic fantasy!!!!!!! ;)
Posted 05 Aug 2011 09:50

I would like to do it on a big stage in Vegas as part of a sexual Cirque de Soleil-stye orgy performance with me as the star and a spellbound and horny audience watching. It would be under silvery strobe-lights and Tiesto would be spinning in the corner. Later, as I took my bows, instead of throwing roses onstage, the crowd would throw sex toys, and I would have to cleverly find a way to use all of them at the same time during my encore performance.

OK, obviously I went the fantasy-route on this one. Regaeman Man

Topic Party bus -- advice needed
Posted 05 Aug 2011 08:25

I've been on one of these party limo bus things before. It's not a regular limo... it's huge... and very cool. They actually have like a make-shift stripper pole too. Funky lighting... great sound system. Imagine the posh atmosphere of a limo with the size of a small bus. Now, I was on one as part of stagette party transportation to various venues, so we weren't having an orgy, but I think it could be fun.

The only thing is that you won't know what these people look like until you're on the ride. If you are picky with your sexual partners, this might be a drawback, depending on who he has arranged to be there. Overall, it sounds like a fun adventure though.

And don't forget... you can still be straight and kiss girls (Katy Perry says so). thumbup

Topic Welcome, to the Lush Wine Bar!
Posted 04 Aug 2011 14:57

Hello, first time in here. I'm making a pale ale in Rumple's and decided to take a break and enjoy an avocado roll and a glass of sauvignon blanc.

Welcome! Please come back again and enjoy the chocolate truffles and fine Port and licquers after midnight.

Anyone should feel free to just jump into whatever conversation is going on or even start a new topic for discussion... Pour Wine

Let's have fun!

Topic Welcome, to the Lush Wine Bar!
Posted 04 Aug 2011 14:52

i'd feel comfortable at a real burlesque show, while at a strip club, i think i'd just feel a little dirty?

What? You've never been to a strip club???

How did I miss this key fact in the time that I've known you? That means more dirty points for me... I might be winning now.

*blushes* umm... well... i might have gone once, but that was cause one of the girls invited me in, and to be honest, i felt really uncomfortable and it's not really my thing... ok, so you just pulled ahead. gonna have to have a dirty weekend now to tie it up... and i have been to a bdsm club, so does that count? :)

I've done the BDSM club thing once and and been to 3 fetish parties...

Top that GingerFig-girl! Regaeman Man

Kidding... I already know you can top that.

For some reason I actually really enjoy strip-clubs (with female dancers). I've been too many times to recall actually. I like going with kinky girlfriends, and even with a boyfriend for couples dances. Then there was that one time with the (now famous) porn star and let me tell you it was... Oops, I forgot we're sitting in a classy wine bar. Nevermind. Pass the stuffed olives please. Embarassed

Topic Welcome, to the Lush Wine Bar!
Posted 04 Aug 2011 08:49

i'd feel comfortable at a real burlesque show, while at a strip club, i think i'd just feel a little dirty?

What? You've never been to a strip club???

How did I miss this key fact in the time that I've known you? That means more dirty points for me... I might be winning now. stirthepot

Topic Welcome, to the Lush Wine Bar!
Posted 04 Aug 2011 07:43

Haha... blonde moment for me. That should have been kind of obvious, right?

I find the problem with a lot of modern strip clubs is that unless it's a featured dancer, sometimes it just looks like a girl buzzed out on quaaludes or just completely stoned sort of wandering around on stage, swaying and peeling off clothes. The nudity in itself is sexy for some, I guess. Plus I'm a girl, maybe I just expect more from my sexual entertainment... but... I feel that burlesque focuses more on the performance and pulls your mind into it as well. To keep me interested, I just think that seduction should involve more than just getting naked. I would love to find (or create) a cool vintage-y burlesque club in my city. I actually think it would be a sexy date idea. More women would probably feel more comfortable going into a burlesque club than a strip joint too.

Of course, Cher's character in the movie didn't quite have the business pouring in... but anyway... I would obviously run the club a lot better than she did! Plus I wouldn't mind getting on stage now and then either. glasses8

Topic Creampie Eating
Posted 04 Aug 2011 07:11

Yes... definitely.

It's also a sexy idea to vary up penetration and pussy-eating during a single session. When guys think of changing positions, try going down on her instead. She will love the feeling of a warm tongue in between all those hard thrusts. As a bonus, it will also make you last longer.

An advanced technique idea could involve a glass dildo previously chilled in the freezer. Vary the hard fucking with the warm tongue and then slide the cool dildo into her... then repeat. It's very stimulating. After the creampie, you can use the glass dildo on her directly afterwards and then she can suck on it while you go down on her and enjoy the rest. I've always found sharing to be sexy.

Topic Welcome, to the Lush Wine Bar!
Posted 03 Aug 2011 22:45

Nice job Your Royal Spriteness! Another corner of the Kingdom for you to play in. Plus I was getting lonely in here eating salad and drinking skinny margaritas for the past year all by myself...

First question that comes to mind that fits this thread that I've been thinking about lately. What do we all think about burlesque dancing? I know it had a little modern revival with the Pussycat Dolls and that movie starring Christina Aguilera which I actually quite liked (can't remember the name of it now). Do you find burlesque to be sexier than modern strip clubs? More artistic? Maybe we'll end up with a throwback to a sexuality that was more about corsets and teasing rather than straight up tits and ass... I know even regular porn is actually starting to seem kinkier to me now when the girls are partly clothed. Maybe we're all getting desensitized.

Thoughts anyone? I would love to get some guys perspectives on this one too.

For inspiration... the lovely Dita Von Teese (who sometimes makes me wish I could rock that sultry brunette look for a night or two).

Topic Where do you live?
Posted 03 Aug 2011 11:20

A condo in the city (location, location, location... but yeah, one day I will want grass and trees).

Topic Today in Pictures (post a picture representing your mood)
Posted 03 Aug 2011 07:20

Topic What tv/movie character did you crush on as a kid?
Posted 02 Aug 2011 15:30

Vlad the Impaler. Mmmm...

OK, so I had a bit of a Dracula fetish... is anyone really that surprised? Embarassed

Topic Hollywood Body of the Year ... goes to .....
Posted 02 Aug 2011 15:21

I agree... Helen Mirren sets the standard.

She's avoided those extreme plastic surgery pitfalls that have practically disfigured a lot of ageing hollywood women (Joan Rivers, are you listening?).

Helen is a natural beauty and has a great attitude.

Topic Orgasms?
Posted 02 Aug 2011 11:05

If you haven't been able to, I'd suggest a vibrator as the easiest way to understand what your body needs to get to orgasm (or even how it feels to have one). It will probably become easier to reach orgasm once you actually know what it feels like.

You can get a cheap but very effective clit-stimulator like "The Pocket Rocket" for about $15 (you can find them online). Playing with clit stimulation will probably be the fastest route to achieving climax. Do not get a dildo... it's not going to do enough for you.

And obviously you'll need some sort of mental stimulation as well, so have some porn or sexy stories on hand to get you in the mood.

Topic quickest way to a woman's heart?
Posted 02 Aug 2011 10:57

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart and is their a foolproof way of getting a lady to like you?

I would suggest a voodoo spell or a self-help manual for the quickest route to true love.

I think this book offers a money-back guarantee if it takes longer than 90 minutes. It might be worth checking out! :)

Topic chick magnet?
Posted 02 Aug 2011 10:47

Your first step is to define who you are to yourself ake a piece of paper and list all your qualities - both pro´s and con´s then focus on the pros and find ways to let her know you have those. If its humor, or brains, or phisique, or intense knowledge on a subject.

this is the best advice so far. but i dont get it...ive faked confidence. so really? you guys cant fake that? or you just cant fake it with women? can you fake it on the job or in other areas?

im not being really curious about this.

I agree LMB... the point is to get his training wheels off. Faking confidence (haven't we all done this before when we had nerves or anxiety about something?) is meant to get him out there into the world of actual live experience with women. Faking confidence isn't about being fake... it's about rejecting the idea that you're going to give in to self-pity and social anxiety that let the woman you are asking out or dating become aware of this fact. It's not attractive... so why reveal it? Start small where you feel that you can have your nerves under control and go for it. With more experience, you will actually gain the confidence that you are lacking now. Confidence comes from actual experience. But you aren't going to get any experience if you indulge your lack of confidence by fading into the background and reinforcing negative thoughts in your mind about how no woman wants you. If you don't think and act like you are worth it, then no woman is going to think it either.

Topic chick magnet?
Posted 01 Aug 2011 16:44

Confidence. (ie. not admitting that you're a chronic failure with women).

Fake it until you feel it... that's my advice. :)

Topic Bee Sting Sex
Posted 01 Aug 2011 10:36

I think a jar full of mosquitoes would be more fun.

Topic Random drug tests for middle school students
Posted 01 Aug 2011 10:25

Is this the wave of the future? Good idea or bad idea?

Drug Testing for Middle School ]

BELVIDERE, N.J. – A northern New Jersey school district has adopted a voluntary random drug testing program for middle school students.
Parental consent is required for sixth, seventh, and eighth grade students in the Belvidere school district. Parents must also pay for the cost of the treatment program.

Those who test positive will be required to attend an early intervention program and visit a guidance counselor or nurse at least six times.
Superintendent Dirk Swaneveld told The Express-Times of Easton, Pa., hopefully the program "works as a deterrent and to help kids."

The drug policy has been in place for Belvidere High School students since 2008, where students must agree to be in the random testing pool in order to participate in athletics and extracurricular activities and to receive a parking permit. The middle school testing program does not include any incentives for students to sign up.

Topic Male Pattern Baldness
Posted 31 Jul 2011 08:53

As long as you don't resort to the combover or weird attempts to hide it, you should be fine.

You can also just pre-empt the look and shave your head and go with that look. It can be sexy!

I will admit that I'm not usually attracted to overtly balding guys at first glance, but if I was into the guy or in love and he happened to go bald over the years, I really wouldn't care at all.

I think you can definitely embrace it and work with it. You seem to have a good attitude about it so far! :)

Topic Bad Date Bingo
Posted 31 Jul 2011 08:26

Is it okay for a guy post about a bad date here?

Yes, definitely!

Guys, feel free to add your bad date stories!

I'm sure 'some' women aren't perfect dates either. Fugly

Topic dom - sub
Posted 30 Jul 2011 13:48

Dancing doll, thank you for your answer.

As a follow up, would you consider something like your guy having you masturbate while at work and bringing the panties home for him too intrusive in daily life or a fun extension of bedroom play?

That would definitely be ok. I see that as more playful and sexy than dominant though.

I think being 'dominant' is a very loose term actually. It probably means something different to everyone.

Topic Al fresco
Posted 30 Jul 2011 13:45

Anyone else masturbated outside? I',m still a bit shaky from it, could I be arrested?!

Not unless there was a Masturbation Sting Operation going on in this neighbourhood. At worst, you might end up in a Youporn video posted online by some other jogger who captured it as an amateur vid on his cellphone.

I don't have the urge to masturbate in public very often. I've done it once or twice on the beach in a discreet way and relying more on kegals, dirty thoughts and a cleverly angled beach towel rather than fingers. But yeah, it's not a regular craving for me. I love sex in public though. I much prefer to have a partner in crime when indulging. :)

Topic Bad Date Bingo
Posted 30 Jul 2011 12:56

I seriously love this thread... icon_biggrin

I will be adding some tragic stories from my own past but I have to contain my laughter first.

Topic dom - sub
Posted 30 Jul 2011 12:51

1. Do you enjoy the sub role?

Yes, I love it, but being a switch, I actually enjoy both dom/sub roles. I'm not really into it on a BDSM level though.

2. Why do you think it turns you on?

Because it's a pleasure to relinquish all control when I have to be in control during the rest of life. I also like the uninhibited vulnerability of it. It's raw, primal and kind of sexy to be lustfully dominated.

3. Do you remember how young you were the first time you had these thoughts?

I was of legal age. :)

4. How far do you like the scenario to go? How much of your daily life would you like controlled, for instance being given tasks to perform at work, or going shopping and having him pick out things to buy?

I have ZERO desire to be dominated anywhere in life other than sexually. I really wish that men would understand this: When a woman enjoys being dominated sexually it has absolutely nothing to do with wanting to be treated like a subpar human being or an owned slave in the rest of her waking life. The guys that don't understand this distinction are abusive assholes. One has nothing to do with the other in a healthy relationship. It's called roleplaying . I'm amazed at how many people don't 'get' this one.

Topic the great hair debate
Posted 30 Jul 2011 12:40

That noted, do you shave, wax or braid your scrotum hairs, dude? I quit shaving a year ago, Dancing_Doll noted in one of the other 300 pubic hair forum threads that shaving was too damned metro for her tastebuds.

No, no... I like it metro! I am always in favour of the hair-free to immaculately trimmed zone. Balls should be smooth, like ripe plums that roll on the tongue. thumbup
See, there is a reason for these threads after all.

Grab your razor and foam... or be the sexy uber-metrosexual and book that waxing appointment!

Topic Today in Pictures (post a picture representing your mood)
Posted 30 Jul 2011 09:45

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 30 Jul 2011 09:35

ok, Doll - i gave you a glowing endorsement... can i get those nude photos back now?

It's too late... I already sold them to Hustler. You'll be appearing in their September issue of the photo-spread 'Dirty Disney Divas of Cyberpsace' ... Uhm, they photoshopped a couple of dwarves into them too but I figure it just makes it all kinkier, right? angel7

PS. Thanks to everyone for the love! XO