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Switching it up Options · View
Sub_BiteMe
Posted: Saturday, June 1, 2013 9:44:32 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 5/30/2013
Posts: 2
Location: United States
I've always been the more submissive type, however my boyfriend has recently informed me that he'd like me to be in control every once in a while. Any advice on how to go about this is a comfortable, less hardcore way? I'm not really sure what to do as I have always let him take the wheel.
Curiosity72
Posted: Saturday, June 1, 2013 11:09:10 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 5/3/2013
Posts: 67
Location: Australia
I have found the same with my wife.. She always wants me to initiate sex at night... and being an ignorant bloke sometime I don't get the messages she sends out.....

I have told her if she wants to get intimate then perhaps she should initiate and take control with what she wants.

So my advise to would be to start with some pampering then request / demands the things you like him to do to you and layback 7 enjoy
Guest
Posted: Sunday, June 2, 2013 12:49:48 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 779,318
As a die hard switch, I would caution that this is often difficult ground to traverse.

To cut right to the chase, when it comes to taking control, or giving up control, you have to have it in you to begin with. It is not a learned trait. Not saying there is not a potential discovery process here, but there has to be something waiting to be discovered.

It was expressed most clearly by a lady who I had the pleasure of knowing many years ago. She was a rampant submissive and craved being tied up during love-making. She and her husband were very much in love.They were soul mates. But, he didn't have a dominant bone in his body. He would of course try to give her what she craved, but she put it succinctly when she explained: "He's not dominant. When he ties me up I just feel silly".

Bottom line, you may be able to find if he's inclined that way, but if he's not....
Guest
Posted: Sunday, June 2, 2013 1:06:37 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 779,318
"Release the Krakin!" (or tigress). Imagine what you'd like to do to him or have him do to you, then make it so. Firmly give orders in exact phrases. Do this, do that.
SweetPenny
Posted: Sunday, June 2, 2013 8:39:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/15/2010
Posts: 1,274
Location: State of Confusion
I'm definitely more submissive by nature, but once in a while I do switch. I try to think about what I enjoy as a submissive: What would I like said to me? What would I like done to me? How would I like to punished for that?
Peter242
Posted: Tuesday, June 4, 2013 2:52:07 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 3/4/2008
Posts: 55
Think of your favorite strict teacher and become her.
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