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What exactly is Vanilla Sex? Options · View
SereneProdigy
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 3:32:35 PM

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Hello folks,

This question is addressed to both genders.

What do you consider vanilla sex?

I've always considered myself vanilla, as my sex sessions are mainly respectful interactions between a female and myself. No toys or anything fancy, just a male and a female ready to fuck each other out as it was done 2 million years ago.

So what exactly soils the vanilla flavor?

- When I change positions 5 times in 10 minutes?
- When I ram too fast or too hard?
- When my partner screams "fuck that cunt harder"?
- When I slip a finger in her butt?
- When I slip my dick in her butt?
- When I cum all over her?

I've done all of these in the past and still considered it vanilla.

If this is vanilla, why is it then associated with being dull?

Personally, I would find adding toys, accessories or other partners as being boring ; I really don't want anything or anyone standing in the way of me and my girl.

Thoughts?
Taboo_Lover
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 5:01:05 PM

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MadMartigan
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 5:11:41 PM

Rank: Raised on Blackroot

Joined: 6/17/2013
Posts: 2,206
Location: United States
I imagine it is sex with vanilla extract as the go to lubricator.
Poppet
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:05:23 PM

Rank: Cheeky Chick

Joined: 10/5/2012
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Location: In Your Dirty Fantasies, United States
Honestly I think everyone’s idea of “vanilla” is going to be different. Yes, adding toys, and having others join can be fun but that doesn’t mean you’re not vanilla. It just means you like a wee bit of kink.

The term “Vanilla sex” comes from the BDSM lifestyle, I do believe. They think if you’re not in the Lifestyle, you’re vanilla. It’s kind of like your own tag. We’re BDSM is “The LifeStyle or BDSM” if you’re not in it, you’re “Vanilla”

I’m in the BDSM LifeStyle, but I do like the vanilla stuff also. You can tell that just by reading my stories. I don’t mind using toys, and playing in dangerous might get caught places. It all depends on how much you want to add to your sex. I guess its like “spicing up your sex life”, kind of like that term. I would suppose.

I think you’ll get a different answer from everyone.


Buz
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:10:49 PM

Rank: The Linebacker
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When we spread vanilla ice cream on each other and eat it off. Lick it off if its melting. That cold creamy soft ice cream makes for a nice erotic treat. If you want a different sensation let her put ice cream on your balls and enjoy her slowly licking it off. You may get chill bumps! Ice cream always makes her nipples very hard. :)





Magical_felix
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:13:25 PM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 7,657
Location: California
I always thought it was fucking a white girl.

Dancing_Doll
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:17:14 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde
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I have no idea where the line is really drawn. I think saying 'vanilla sex' is basically what people term as anything below their particular kink level. It's kind of like a casual insult with a solid dose of arrogance - "pffft - you're so vanilla and I am way kinkier than you". And then, of course, anything more extreme than what they're into is deemed as freaky or fucked up, so everyone who uses that term thinks that they're at exactly the right level of 'cool kink'.

Even though it's used in the BDSM world, there are also various levels within that community as well. I'm sure someone who takes BSDM to a fringe extreme also thinks there are plenty of 'vanilla BDSM'ers' as well. And maybe those who enjoy the things that are forbidden by Lush rules would think that all of us, including the BDSM crowd are vanilla.

In a way, it's kind of like sexual elitism.




sprite
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:17:17 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
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Magical_felix wrote:
I always thought it was fucking a white girl.






Love not hate.
sprite
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:20:15 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
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Dancing_Doll wrote:
I have no idea where the line is really drawn. I think saying 'vanilla sex' is basically what people term as anything below their particular kink level. It's kind of like a casual insult with a solid dose of arrogance - "pffft - you're so vanilla and I am way kinkier than you". And then, of course, anything more extreme than what they're into is deemed as freaky or fucked up, so everyone who uses that term thinks that they're at exactly the right level of 'cool kink'.

Even though it's used in the BDSM world, there are also various levels within that community as well. I'm sure someone who takes BSDM to a fringe extreme also thinks there are plenty of 'vanilla BDSM'ers' as well. And maybe those who enjoy the things that are forbidden by Lush rules would think that all of us, including the BDSM crowd are vanilla.

In a way, it's kind of like sexual elitism.



btw... i'm way kinkier than you, Vanilla Bean *giggles and runs at superspeed* nooooo! help! she's gonna do bad things to meeeeee!



Love not hate.
Magical_felix
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:28:33 PM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 7,657
Location: California
sprite wrote:




You wanna to turn your two scoops of vanilla into a sundae, girl?

sprite
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:29:15 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
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Magical_felix wrote:


You wanna to turn your two scoops of vanilla into a sundae, girl?


see my previous reply, please. Regaeman Man



Love not hate.
Magical_felix
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:32:08 PM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 7,657
Location: California
sprite wrote:


see my previous reply, please. Regaeman Man


You don't want me to see? Like, wear a blindfold? Kinky.

SereneProdigy
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 7:58:12 PM

Rank: Cryptic Vigilante
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Thanks to both Poppet and Dancing_Doll. I did not know about that dichotomy with BDSM.

I somehow agree with Dancing_Doll that there is some form of elitism in the use of that term. I also think the term has a connotation of prevalence, meaning vanilla sex might refer to what the majority of people perform in their bedroom, in average. Still, it's hard to establish such a statistical average, since sex practices are so varied and no serious study was ever made to reveal what people do in their intimacy.

In a way I find it funny when people portray they might possess sexual superiority over me just because of some of their kinky practices. Most of these practices I don't exercise because I'm scared or inhibited, but simply because I find them awkward or boring.

From now on I think I'll just label my sexual life as melting vanilla. Standard but hot as can be.
TeilaWolfe
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 8:09:20 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 7/14/2013
Posts: 66
Location: Perth, Australia
For me, Vanilla Sex is just Sex without toys or role plays. I don't see it as a lifestyle either. I believe that you aren't Vanilla or Not Vanilla, It's just a tag for when you have sex. One day you might decide to have vanilla sex (no toys or role plays) with your partner, then the next day, you might feel like mixing it up with a few toys. As long as there is no toys or role plays it's vanilla, no matter how many positions you put in, or how hard you fuck each other. I don't see why it would be considered boring though. I've never seen "vanilla sex" as boring. Just the natural state of sex without the extra's. I guess the people who call it boring are just those who always like to use toys. Me, I'm a mix, some days I'll feel like drawing out the foreplay and using toys, doing role plays. But other days I'll just feel like a good old traditional fuck without the bells and whistles. I suppose it's different for everyone though.

Hey there, I'm an inspiring erotic writer. I take story requests and write about most anything so hit me up if you have a crazy fantasy that you would like me to bring to life ;) Also, please check out my stories and comment and vote if you like them!
SereneProdigy
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 8:10:06 PM

Rank: Cryptic Vigilante
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LOL at sprite and Magical_felix arguing, while looking at their avatars. They seem like two characters from a Disney fairy tale.

The Kinky Princess and the Annoying Cat now in 3D theaters near you... LMFAO, Lfunny ... look them up, really!


@ TeilaWolfe : Thank you! Very nice insight. We share the same opinion I guess.
kylie_kained
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 8:14:50 PM

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Location: Over your Knee Screaming and Kicking!, United King
Vanilla sex has to be sex with vanilla flavoured food and cream ;)
















Dancing_Doll
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 8:16:42 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde
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sprite wrote:


btw... i'm way kinkier than you, Vanilla Bean *giggles and runs at superspeed* nooooo! help! she's gonna do bad things to meeeeee!


Uh oh... Don't make me tie you up again, girl! You know where I like to put the vanilla ice-cream cone, don't you? a1089




SereneProdigy
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 8:26:34 PM

Rank: Cryptic Vigilante
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Dancing_Doll wrote:


Uh oh... Don't make me tie you up again, girl! You know where I like to put the vanilla ice-cream cone, don't you? a1089


So you girls are vanilla too after all!? I knew you couldn't resist...

I'm the Vanilla King and I say stop this at once! Or fear my wrath... L16free-sexy-smileys-947
WellMadeMale
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 10:19:47 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,781
Location: Cakeland, United States
I've always said that I'm capable of all 32 flavors, but not all at once. That's too far out of my league.

Too much of a lot of good things is ... too much for this man.

But I do prefer drinking from cans instead of bottles...although I've been known to drink straight from the keg.

Yeah I know...my white trash tail is showing. Sue me.

Obscenity is the last refuge of an inarticulate motherfucker.
Metilda
Posted: Wednesday, August 7, 2013 11:17:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/10/2013
Posts: 1,479
Location: United States
“Nothing plain or old about vanilla – it’s a very intriguing flavor." - C.G.

See what I did there? See. Shhh



...
Guest
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 7:00:54 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 781,118
"Sex that involves no twists or kinkiness, and no S&M. Basically plain regular sex. Typically sweet and happy and very lovey-dovey."

Source(s):

urbandictionary.com
MadMartigan
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 7:08:56 AM

Rank: Raised on Blackroot

Joined: 6/17/2013
Posts: 2,206
Location: United States
Dancing_Doll wrote:


Uh oh... Don't make me tie you up again, girl! You know where I like to put the vanilla ice-cream cone, don't you? a1089




Ice cream style.
Dancing_Doll
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 7:16:03 AM

Rank: Alpha Blonde
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SereneProdigy wrote:


So you girls are vanilla too after all!? I knew you couldn't resist...

I'm the Vanilla King and I say stop this at once! Or fear my wrath... L16free-sexy-smileys-947


Pffft... I'll tie you up and have my way with you too, Vanilla King!


Then the Sugar Kingdom will be allll mine! Muahaahaa! glasses8


Liz
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 7:37:33 AM

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Wait, so this doesn't have anything to do with guys sticking their cocks in tubs of Häagen-Dazs? scratch



Adagio
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 8:23:07 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/24/2013
Posts: 2,192
its what my granny and uncle grand pa do when they take out their teeth and gum graham crackers
sprite
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 9:11:39 AM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
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Posts: 20,768
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Dancing_Doll wrote:


Pffft... I'll tie you up and have my way with you too, Vanilla King!


Then the Sugar Kingdom will be allll mine! Muahaahaa! glasses8


i had this little fake insult rant going where i called you sugar plum fairy, and i want to add a picture, but this is what came up when i googled it, so i thought i'd share :D





Love not hate.
reddeville18
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 9:23:18 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

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the missionary position, ok he got his and we are done.....was it good for you? good I got mine and so sorry for you....lmao
BlondeBookworm
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 9:29:38 AM

Rank: Story Verifier
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Well, I'm not really sure, but when I'm reading and the term comes up I just figure it means boring and dull sex with nothing exciting or new thrown in, I had no clue that it had anything to do with BDSM stuff up until I read the posts by Poppet and Dancing Doll
reddeville18
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 9:31:10 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

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Posts: 266
Location: northwest, United States
oh hell I needed this this am.....between sprite and that cat spittin and hissin and Wellmademale..........gigglin my ass off...thanks guys.....Redd
pantyslutboy
Posted: Thursday, August 8, 2013 10:31:02 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 6/5/2011
Posts: 8
Location: Desert Dweller, United States

Vanilla sex, vanilla lifestyle, etc is a basic term used for what one does when not participating in a D/s (Domination/submissive lifestyle). For example, many who are into BDSM or various aspects of kink or fetish play also have a vanilla life...it could be a family, your profession. therefore the term vanilla is used in the context of instances when not participating in a D/s lifestyle. for those who live their kink 24/7, T/they do not have a vanilla world, they are lifestyle players. within my experience in a D/s lifestyle, this is how the term is used and defined.
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