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Poll Question : Guy who dominates the bed.
Choice Votes Statistics
Guy who leads you in bed. 19 47 %
Equal between partner. 16 40 %
You lead the sex. 2 5 %
You dominate the sex. 0 0 %
Other 3 7 %

What kind of guy do you like in bed? Options · View
Guest
Posted: Sunday, May 17, 2009 10:25:11 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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Who do you prefer take charge in bed? I'm curious if I should let the girls I go out with take charge of me, or should I be the one leading this dance?
castlequeen
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 12:07:39 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/24/2009
Posts: 589
If you're in an equal relationship, it should be equal, however we usually just go with whoever initiated it taking charge for the evening.

"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere." - Groucho Marx
Catnip
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 12:19:38 AM

Rank: Internet Sensation

Joined: 3/30/2009
Posts: 3,967
Location: Cloudy dreams., Sweden
It depends on the mood and what sort of guy Im with.

If he'a not a person who takes charge I do, if he's taking charge I mostly let him, though I hate beeing passive.
It usually switches between both I guess.
I love to seduce. But I'm a bit of a tease so at times the guy needs to take control before I drive us both insane.

Lisa
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 12:25:58 AM

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Location: Victoria, Australia
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told. evil4 It depends on the mood at the time.
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 4:08:47 AM

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So it pretty much comes down to two things: A. The mood. B. Who starts it. Seems simple enough, but it never is when the time comes.
MMonroe
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 7:12:09 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

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Location: United Kingdom
Lisa wrote:
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told. evil4 It depends on the mood at the time.


This. I have to feel comforatable with my partner before I take charge, so in the beginnings of a new relationship its usually him that initiates and takes charge until I can stop being shy



*Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?*



Susan
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 9:34:00 AM

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All depends on my mood as well.
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 10:43:14 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
Lisa wrote:
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told. evil4 It depends on the mood at the time.


Ditto
Zafia
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 10:44:59 AM

Rank: Lush Legend

Joined: 4/13/2008
Posts: 5,209
Location: Shoe Heaven
Lisa wrote:
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told. evil4 It depends on the mood at the time.


My sentiments exactly....lol

toast

"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."





Guest
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 12:40:43 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
My hat's off to Lisa. Everyone seems to like your answer so I think I'm gonna try and look for the signs in the future instead of just deciding before I start about whether I'm going to lead or let her lead. Thanks all! Applause
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 2:34:14 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
you left out 'does the dishes after' lol...
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 5:27:39 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
Usually, I dominate over Tech, but it doesn't stop her from doing something sexy and unexpected for me. We know what is fun and exciting and erotic for the other person and "just do it". Even though I am supposed to call the shots, we do whatever we feel like doing that whole night and even then we run out of time.
SarahBeara18
Posted: Monday, May 18, 2009 9:11:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/5/2008
Posts: 98
rocco are you and teck like...married and living together? or what.....and where did you guys meet?
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, May 19, 2009 10:20:46 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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Tech and I met in a chat room, believe it or not. It was the first time I'd met someone online who lived close to me. To make a long story short, we eventually met and hit it off.
I'm married but separated. (Wife and I are happy this way and she has a boyfriend now, too.) Tech is married and has a loving hubby and family. It's an open marriage and he knows all about me. That shocks a lot of people, but it has worked very well, for over a year and a half now. Tech feels she's the luckiest woman in the world, having two men she's in love with.
Whether people agree with our relationship or not doesn't concern us. We only know it works for us.
fystee
Posted: Friday, May 22, 2009 10:22:10 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/28/2007
Posts: 1,285
Location: tied up somewhere
roccotool wrote:
Tech feels she's the luckiest woman in the world, having two men she's in love with.
Whether people agree with our relationship or not doesn't concern us. We only know it works for us.


Tech is the luckiest woman in the world. She has not only 1 but 2 men who love and care for her deeply! Whether other people agree or not does not matter.....what matters is what makes you guys happy! Good for you!hello1
Guest
Posted: Saturday, May 23, 2009 5:11:10 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883

Thanks, fystee. It's nice to hear someone else understands our unique relationship.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, May 23, 2009 5:49:54 PM

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You are both incredibly lucky, Rocco, as is Tech's hubby. I don't get why some people view love as a zero-sum game. I am quite sure that Tech's love for you in no way diminishes her love for her husband. Good on you both, and the world needs more people like you!

In a world where love is so hard to find and keep, why does it matter what shape a relationship takes, as long as everyone involved is aware of the others and happy with the situation?
Guest
Posted: Saturday, May 23, 2009 11:23:51 PM

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Rocco if Tech's husband is anything like you she is indeed very lucky.
fystee
Posted: Saturday, May 23, 2009 11:41:30 PM

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Joined: 9/28/2007
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Location: tied up somewhere
she is very lucky! I want someone like you Rocco!
Guest
Posted: Sunday, May 24, 2009 3:04:37 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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roccotool wrote:

Thanks, fystee. It's nice to hear someone else understands our unique relationship.


Rocco, my relational life is at times incredibly complex, two men, one woman, so on, and always, it's open, with the paramount issues no jealousy, safety, respect all 'round. Sometimes we mix it up, other times we are in separate orbits. I delightedly applaud others who can navigate the waters of the non-traditional. It's incredible when it works, congrats to you and Tech (and your respective others) for making it so.

Ciao, dolls,

~Dare
Guest
Posted: Sunday, May 24, 2009 3:08:31 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
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Groan, as usual, I'll take the minority position. As a Dominant, I do not need to control every aspect of sex and sensuality, but I do look for men who are very strong (physically, mentally, emotionally) against whom I can push. We play as equals until such time as my native Dominance sees a natural place to take the lead, and that which is inside them that wishes to yield does so.

In casual encounters, I am great at equals, but in my relational life, in my committed relationships, my Dominance is my set point.

All except for with one person who draws for the scintilla of submissive energy that exists inside me...:>
ilikecock
Posted: Saturday, May 30, 2009 1:32:45 PM

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Location: United Kingdom
i love being dominated, i like men to be nasty and forceful to me in bed.
MissLikesEmBig
Posted: Saturday, August 01, 2009 7:13:50 PM

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Joined: 7/16/2009
Posts: 24
nicola
Posted: Sunday, August 02, 2009 2:40:50 AM

Rank: Matriarch
Moderator

Joined: 12/6/2006
Posts: 26,099
Location: By a fireplace.
A warm one.
Guest
Posted: Sunday, August 02, 2009 4:20:27 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
I always start of being dominate in bed, but then the men I have been with in the past are just are able to make me feel so overcome with passion, I just end up having to give in. My ex used to like B+B and he always liked me to be the dominent one which I used to enjoy, but it did get a bit one-sided and I felt very left out of attention for me.


ha ha Nic a warm one LOL
Americanheart
Posted: Thursday, August 08, 2013 12:03:48 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/18/2012
Posts: 10,727
Location: Hopefully soon to be, United States
It should be equal in the bed, but if your in BDSM relationship/marriage i'll say the Dominant Man/woman or if they want to change it up a bit the Submissive may have a hand at it

Kimasa
Posted: Friday, August 09, 2013 12:46:20 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/18/2010
Posts: 1,339
Location: Narnia, United Kingdom
There is no definitive answer to your question except to say it depends on the girl.

Personally I only like it when the guy or gal I'm with is in charge

My latest story:

http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-school-reunion.aspx
VirginalViet
Posted: Saturday, August 10, 2013 1:28:30 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/4/2012
Posts: 360
Location: United States
Well it does depend on the chemistry and mood of the couple right? I mean generally I prefer the guy to be confident and to be somewhat of a "take charge" kind of person. On the other hand I also can be a terrible tease and very flirtatious and if I'm in the right mood I can be quite aggressive actually. People think I look "sweet" and "innocent", but hehe not always. With girls I have always been pretty passive except for one or two times when I was quite drunk hehe. IDK? I sound messed up right? Haha probably everyone is like this.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, August 10, 2013 10:18:38 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 652,883
A live one.
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