Welcome Guest Search | Active Topics | Members | Log In | Register

Looking for best way to move from one scene to another. Options · View
Posted: Sunday, December 29, 2013 7:23:32 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 9/5/2013
Posts: 6
Location: United States
I am writing a story with several transitions from one scene and characters to another setting and characters.

Example: Mother and daughter exchange dialog in living room. The story next focuses on the father dealing with an issue on his job at the same time. The two situations are related and come together later as part of the overall story.

Do I begin the second scene with: Meanwhile,....? Suggestions welcomed.
Posted: Sunday, December 29, 2013 9:06:41 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 7/8/2012
Posts: 739
Location: The naughty little world inside my head, United Ki
You are right to think about alerting your readers to a change of scene. I like to use ***** for minor changes or o-O-o for a major break (for example at the end of an introductory piece which is independent from the main story). If you want to see what it looks like in practice have a look at Not Dead.

Posted: Sunday, December 29, 2013 9:32:45 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/8/2010
Posts: 1,321
Location: United Kingdom
My story, Circle of Friends uses a lot of scene transitions as it tells seven mini stories about seven characters. Like Abigail, I used story breaks (****) to signal the start of each new mini story.

I've seen other authors use italics to signal a separate sub-plot. I personally don't like this - I prefer to see story telling with words rather than typography. The practice encourages lazy writing.

Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.

Why not read some stories instead

NEW! Want a quick read for your coffee break? Why not try this... Flash Erotica: Scrubber
Posted: Sunday, December 29, 2013 4:53:13 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,568
NEVER say "meanwhile"

I often change location, time, or POV, by using dialogue which is obviously and distinctly that of a different character. I have also been known to us a long series of periods, but, as someone here said, it is always better if you can set then break in writing instead of using punctuation alone.

ON the other hand, Meanwhile DOES have it's place:

"Meanwhile, the Lone Ranger, disguised as a door, gets his knob blown off."

"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
Posted: Thursday, January 02, 2014 9:52:17 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 12/24/2013
Posts: 27
Location: The dark of night, Canada
Loving this discussion....
Posted: Saturday, January 04, 2014 7:20:30 AM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 18,683
Location: My Tower, United States
DLizze wrote:
NEVER say "meanwhile"

use of "Anyway" in a story is also off putting, tho it has nothing to do with changing scenes. personally i do this... o-O-o or just oOo - don't even remember where i picked it up, just started doing it one day and it works for me. :)

Posted: Saturday, January 04, 2014 9:36:02 AM

Rank: Story Verifier

Joined: 10/17/2012
Posts: 5,043
Location: Canada
If the transition is pretty clear or there is a time or space movement (e.g. The next day; After he got up; Down the hall; In the next room; and such) I don't do much else with the transition. If it is less clear, then a physical boundary like Abigail and sprite suggest or a rewrite to add some kind of transition.

Awakening early after a wild night, two people connect in a most intimate way:

In the Wee Hours

Posted: Sunday, January 05, 2014 1:40:36 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 9/5/2013
Posts: 6
Location: United States
I want to thank all who have responded to my question. I am in the process of reworking my story.
Users browsing this topic

Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum.
You cannot reply to topics in this forum.
You cannot delete your posts in this forum.
You cannot edit your posts in this forum.
You cannot create polls in this forum.
You cannot vote in polls in this forum.

Main Forum RSS : RSS

Powered by Yet Another Forum.net version (NET v4.0) - 11/14/2007
Copyright © 2003-2006 Yet Another Forum.net. All rights reserved.