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Simran_Kaur_Chawla
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 7:07:54 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/15/2012
Posts: 833
Location: KANPUR, India
I don't know if its the right place but here it goes......well its my best friend,she is a senior to me in college.we talk about everything ,like everything,meaning we even talk who we wanna have sex with.Well the thing is people have started saying that we are committed but it isn't so. What are ur opinions??
Liz
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 8:24:50 AM

Rank: Scarlet Seductress
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Joined: 1/22/2013
Posts: 5,823
Location: In the sweet shop, United Kingdom
Committed to what? Each other?

If you are not romantically involved, just set them straight.


ShyVixen
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 8:45:42 AM

Rank: Story Verifier
Moderator

Joined: 5/2/2009
Posts: 1,489
Location: United States
The question is do you think she has feelings for you and have you thought of her like that. I understand if you don't and if it's making it hard for the two of you to be with others if they think your committed to one another, but as Liz said just set them straight.
Simran_Kaur_Chawla
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 8:58:23 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/15/2012
Posts: 833
Location: KANPUR, India
but the thing is i do have secret feelings for her,but i can't confess them cause she likes someone else and i don't wanna lose my friendship.Plus just to clarify we talk day and night and yet don't run out of topics to talk,its like something i can't expalin.i don't know about her feelings
Guest
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 9:24:16 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 676,023
No you are not committed. The fact you talk day and night and never run out of things to talk about does not matter. Plenty of FRIENDS do that. You seem to have a lot in common with her and you both enjoy talking to each other. It also seems like you have a bit of a crush on her (but not only her if you talk to her about who you want to have sex with and it is not HER) . But that too does not make you "committed".

But there is an easy way to sort this all out, and asking US isn't the way.... ASK HER. ;)

buttercup2u
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 10:47:55 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/13/2012
Posts: 439
Location: lost in paradise, United States
JohnC wrote:
No you are not committed. The fact you talk day and night and never run out of things to talk about does not matter. Plenty of FRIENDS do that. You seem to have a lot in common with her and you both enjoy talking to each other. It also seems like you have a bit of a crush on her (but not only her if you talk to her about who you want to have sex with and it is not HER) . But that too does not make you "committed".

But there is an easy way to sort this all out, and asking US isn't the way.... ASK HER. ;)



Excellent advice, who are we to say the status of your relationship? It takes two to be committed. I also think that you worry too much about what others are saying about you two. Who cares what they think? They aren't living your life, you are. Talk to her, maybe she feels the same way about you, you won't know unless you talk to her. You don't have to confess your feelings about her, but you can ask her what she thinks about the rumor...
Dani
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 10:57:57 AM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
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Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 5,878
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
Just tell her either way. Either she'll reject you or she'll accept you. If she accepts you, yay! If she rejects you, things will be awkward for a while but if you're as good friends as you say you are, you guys will fall back in the swings eventually. Just stay alert, and don't let her walk all over you.

I hope you're not friend zoning yourself in hopes of winning her heart, because that almost always backfires. And I personally think you owe it to the both of you to let her know how you feel.


"Sometimes, unity is more terrifying than rage." - Deray McKesson

Simran_Kaur_Chawla
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 11:16:59 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/15/2012
Posts: 833
Location: KANPUR, India
thnxs guys
it helps a lot
dpw
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 1:34:22 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/15/2013
Posts: 4,460
Location: Liverpool, United Kingdom
buttercup2u wrote:



Talk to her, maybe she feels the same way about you, you won't know unless you talk to her. You don't have to confess your feelings about her, but you can ask her what she thinks about the rumor...


This is exactly what I was thinking.
Maybe a bit of fishing is needed, you might be pleasantly surprised.
clittouch
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 2:23:27 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 1/12/2014
Posts: 69
Location: United Kingdom, United Kingdom
No commitment there, maybe you are over thinking things?
Karranaz
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 4:16:13 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/7/2013
Posts: 121
Others shouldn't assume that just because a friend gives you a hug or calls you during the week that you two are more than friends. You may want to take special care with how you react to how others sees you both. Do not start running away from your friend or keeping your distance from her. Though things might be a bit awkward, if you work through this, you can stay friends. Stay polite, loving and respectful to your friend. And don't lose a good friendship over others presumptions.

ShyVixen
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 6:31:20 PM

Rank: Story Verifier
Moderator

Joined: 5/2/2009
Posts: 1,489
Location: United States
Dani wrote:
Just tell her either way. Either she'll reject you or she'll accept you. If she accepts you, yay! If she rejects you, things will be awkward for a while but if you're as good friends as you say you are, you guys will fall back in the swings eventually. Just stay alert, and don't let her walk all over you.

I hope you're not friend zoning yourself in hopes of winning her heart, because that almost always backfires. And I personally think you owe it to the both of you to let her know how you feel.


Great advice! You want to know one way or another. You would kick yourself if she ended up with another and you never said how you felt. You have nothing to lose, not if your friendship is strong.
GreyHound
Posted: Friday, February 07, 2014 10:48:19 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/28/2014
Posts: 274
Fuck others opinion ... you say you have a crush on her, and you say you talk with her everyday, I know it's difficult for you to ask ... as others said don't friendzone yourself, she might think that you're not interested in her and might be seeing someone ... who knows, she might be thinking like you! If you like her, say it to her about how you feel ... just don't keep your thoughts for long, you might lose her!

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