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Poll Question : Liked or Respected?
Choice Votes Statistics
Liked 1 4 %
Respected 23 95 %

Would you rather be liked, or respected? Options · View
Truemalduke
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 5:24:17 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 1/24/2014
Posts: 86
Location: The Fourth Dimension of Dreams
Like the topic says: Would you rather be liked, or respected?

I would like to preface this first: This does not necessarily apply to how you present yourself on Lush or in the Real World. We often have to make personal sacrifices for the sake of our professional lives which often contradicts our personal feelings.

Ultimately though, all things said and done, would you rather be liked by your peers, or respected by your peers? You can only pick one.




Just keep wallowing in your own chaotic insecure delusions.
Dani
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 5:34:50 PM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 7,209
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
It's impossible to be liked by everyone you ever come across. There are people that I don't like, so it's a rather ridiculous notion (to me) to want to be liked by everyone.

I prefer respect. Well actually, I prefer not to be disrespected. There's a difference. There are people I can't stand, but I will be cordial and civil...or simply pretend they don't exist. And that's what I prefer in return. If you hate me or strongly (or weakly) dislike me, that's totally fine. But either be cordial/civil or pretend I don't exist. But do not disrespect me.





SereneProdigy
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 6:13:18 PM

Rank: Cryptic Vigilante

Joined: 7/16/2013
Posts: 2,887
Location: Into the Unknown
Dunno. Which one offers the best chances for me to get laid?

Seriously, I chose Respected.

In a way, 'liking' someone is just a higher version of 'respecting' someone; if you like a person, chances are you'll also feel inclined to show him respect. Having said that, in most of my interactions I'm really not asking for much more than respect; being 'liked' by too many persons can almost get annoying in certain situations (at least to me); I enjoy my periodic solitude.

Plus, I often find just as much enlightenment in being 'disliked' by others, so long as they show me enough respect to carry constructive discussions.

Edit: I just saw the similarity with Machiavelli's The Prince, where he wrote that a great leader must both be 'liked' and 'feared'. If this interrogation was meant to be seen under that perspective (choosing one over the other), I guess it would often be situational. Some situations warrant more fondness from people, others warrant authority.
TheDevilsWeakness
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 6:22:37 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/19/2011
Posts: 1,374
Location: In a cloud of flour, Canada
I don't care.

If someone doesn't like me or respect me doesn't really matter much anymore.
I spent many years being disrespected because of who I was (A women), what I was (A single mom with a bastard child) and where I worked (As a bartender in a strip club).
I had lots of people that liked me and I thought respected me. But in the end, neither did a thing for me, nor stood up for me when I really needed the help.
Well-respected members of society tend to trod all over the rights of well-liked people so I'd much rather avoid both.

Karranaz
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 6:44:07 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/7/2013
Posts: 121
coffee I cannot force anyone to like or respect me but if they do - thank you.

Adagio
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 6:54:15 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/24/2013
Posts: 2,276
In Lush it matters not an iota to me...I know what I am dealing with. Its the land of sleeping people without down for their pillows.
TXtabber
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 7:52:52 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 11/19/2010
Posts: 72
Location: Hot Town, United States
Being "liked" or "Popular" ends with your last high school yearbook. Being respected covers all aspects and lasts a lifetime.
Guest
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 8:05:25 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Respect it will go a long ways. showing a little respect carries a lot of weight you get so much more giving respect to a person.
Guest
Posted: Monday, March 31, 2014 9:05:36 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Respected
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 1:20:36 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Respected.
anyone can like you.
1LovelyKinkyKitsune
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 12:28:30 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/5/2014
Posts: 945
Location: ♥
adagio_sabadicus wrote:
In Lush it matters not an iota to me...I know what I am dealing with. Its the land of sleeping people without down for their pillows.


@in general: I have a down pillow AND a feather/down mattress! :)
Respect.

lafayettemister
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 12:44:13 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/4/2010
Posts: 6,575
Location: Alabama, United States
Why do the two have to be mutually exclusive? Would I like to be respected but not liked by everyone? No, that would be lonely. Would I like to be liked but not respected? No, that would be empty.





When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates
DanielleX
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 1:32:49 PM

Rank: Blonde Bombshell
Moderator

Joined: 11/6/2011
Posts: 3,704
Location: Liverpool, United Kingdom
Dani wrote:
It's impossible to be liked by everyone you ever come across. There are people that I don't like, so it's a rather ridiculous notion (to me) to want to be liked by everyone.

I prefer respect. Well actually, I prefer not to be disrespected. There's a difference. There are people I can't stand, but I will be cordial and civil...or simply pretend they don't exist. And that's what I prefer in return. If you hate me or strongly (or weakly) dislike me, that's totally fine. But either be cordial/civil or pretend I don't exist. But do not disrespect me.



Very well put

ToshLoveCC
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 2:24:42 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 5/4/2012
Posts: 448
Location: United States
Dani wrote:
It's impossible to be liked by everyone you ever come across. There are people that I don't like, so it's a rather ridiculous notion (to me) to want to be liked by everyone.

I prefer respect. Well actually, I prefer not to be disrespected. There's a difference. There are people I can't stand, but I will be cordial and civil...or simply pretend they don't exist. And that's what I prefer in return. If you hate me or strongly (or weakly) dislike me, that's totally fine. But either be cordial/civil or pretend I don't exist. But do not disrespect me.



^^I couldn't have said it better myself. clapping





Ebrit
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 3:27:06 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/1/2011
Posts: 216
Location: Leicester, United Kingdom
Ill go along with the theme I prefer to be respected.
From a professional point of view when I was a team leader I was both respected and liked by my staff, however this can become a problem when people become over familiar with you and feel they don't have to show proper respect or professionalism in the work place. You also find that if you have good strong friendships they will also respect you, so yeah I would prefer to be respected.
Meggsy
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 3:27:06 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/23/2013
Posts: 1,678
Location: Australia
Respect is paramount.
I know many people 'like' me as a result of something I have done to improve their day.
Respect is earned - to be liked can be fairly basic.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 5:13:55 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
I don't need to be liked. I could live with not being liked. But respect..that's a different story
sprite
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 5:21:25 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
Moderator

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 20,321
Location: My Tower, Spain
respected. if you don't like me, fine. i get it. but don't disrespect me. it's one of the few things that really pisses me off. sometimes there's a little too much street still in me.



Love not hate.
Truemalduke
Posted: Tuesday, April 1, 2014 10:41:25 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 1/24/2014
Posts: 86
Location: The Fourth Dimension of Dreams
This is the kind of question that always results in interesting answers, regardless of which answer is chosen.

Just keep wallowing in your own chaotic insecure delusions.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, April 5, 2014 12:36:26 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Respected, many less than respectable people are VERY likeable!
Wilful
Posted: Saturday, April 5, 2014 5:52:27 PM

Rank: Devil's Advocate
Moderator

Joined: 6/15/2013
Posts: 1,455
Location: Digging a hole on the beach, Australia
Respected, of course.

But it's not a mutually exclusive choice. Professional respect is one thing, whereas being likable is another. Just because you have a hard job with difficult decisions, doesn't mean you have to be an ass about it.

Unless you're a hitman, there's really no reason why you can't be both.

Please take a look at my latest story, Banging for Roof.

And for a sexy little rush of Adrenalin, pick yourself up a copy of the Lush Summer anthology.
Master_Jonathan
Posted: Saturday, April 5, 2014 6:39:06 PM

Rank: Gentleman Master

Joined: 3/6/2013
Posts: 2,838
Location: God's Deep Freezer, United States
Respected.

Banner below is a clickable link!

FabulouslyDelicious
Posted: Sunday, April 6, 2014 1:54:29 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/3/2014
Posts: 1,271
Location: United States
respected


FabulouslyDelicious
Posted: Sunday, April 6, 2014 1:54:37 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/3/2014
Posts: 1,271
Location: United States
respected


Guest
Posted: Friday, April 18, 2014 9:28:59 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Ok call me crazy but the site I used to be in I didn't friend anyone without chatting with them. I got to like them and I had two friends I grew to respect after years of chatting. I still keep in touch with them but only email. I think we all really want both to be liked and the respect...
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, July 2, 2014 10:53:51 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Much rather be respected.
SixtyMinuteMan
Posted: Wednesday, July 2, 2014 11:17:36 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/6/2010
Posts: 119
Location: San Diego, United States
At work, respected. I run construction crews, which is not wholly unlike dealing with guys in prison in that if you're not down, you're out.

Everywhere else, liked. Trust is more important than respect in personal relationships. If you're my friend you can think I'm a goofball- because I absolutely am- just know I love you and will always be there in every way.
Guest
Posted: Thursday, July 3, 2014 4:48:31 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
I've always been respected, I just would like to be liked more
Guest
Posted: Thursday, July 3, 2014 5:19:35 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 819,716
Respected. I really don't care about people liking me. Plus I tend to like people more when they respect me and those around me
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