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How would you react to sexual harrasment by your boss? Options · View
Guest
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 3:21:23 AM

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Imagine one day he says "if you want to keep working here you must spread your legs for me".


What would your answer be?


I guess this depends on many factors. Are you on a desperate financial situation? Is the guy old and ugly? Could you present evidence of the harrasment if you decided to report him to the police?

So I guess you'd rather dont focus on any specific scenario, just think how would you feel about your boss asking you to have sex in order to keep your job, and what your answer would be.

Butterfly
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 10:09:40 AM

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I'm calling his wife and asking her if they discussed this and if she minds....don't wanna get her on my bad side since she's also the boss.

No, seriously, he's not really a bad looking dude, but not my type. I wouldn't stoop to that level anyway, just for a job?? Nope...I'd tell him to get f'kd (by someone else) and walk out.
sprite
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 10:14:49 AM

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easy answer. i'd report his ass, quit, file a sexual harrassment claim, and pretty much stomp on his balls. :)

Live, love, laugh.
LadySharon
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 10:16:45 AM

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I agree with butterfly, and I would go one step further. I would secretly record every conversation we have and threaten to go to HR with the damning evidence if he keeps doing that to me.

I have to keep my dignity intact.

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amber
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 10:55:51 AM

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If I needed the job, I think I would

IMMEDIATELY go to his supervisor and repeat exactly word for word what was said and (since any good boss would not just take my word for it, but investigate it), demand to be transferred to another department/supervisor because undoubtably, the offendor will do everything thereafter to discredit me and my work as, since it is such a serious matter, he would and should be fired for the conduct.


If he has no supervisor, I would immediately go to another room or outside and look up and call an attorney handling labor and employment matters since they handle those cases and follow his/her advice.


If I didn't need the job, and he had no supervisor, I would probably openly quit and in front of everyone, say why and demand all of my unpaid wages up to the end of that day to be tendered in full at that moment.
Nikki703
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 11:36:22 AM

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I would report him to his/her superior. But this is such a hard thing to prove without a witness or a history of complaints about him/her. Its usually a case of he said/she said.

If I really didnt care about the job, I might just kick him so hard that he could not harass anyone again. Probably end up arrested for assault though!

MMonroe
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 11:58:51 AM

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If it was the only job i could get and desperately needed the money, maybe. Otherwise i'd be out of there so fast and dragging him to court with me



*Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?*



SweetPenny
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 12:05:19 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/15/2010
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Location: State of Confusion
Sure I'd do it, but first I'd get myself one of these:

Quote:
Rape-aXe is essentially a female condom with hooks inside. A woman can insert the device with an applicator similar to that of a tampon. Should she be raped, the hooks attach to the rapist’s penis, just in the skin, not deep enough to draw blood.

Impossible to dislodge, the device will need to be removed by a doctor, resulting in the rapist’s inevitable arrest.


But, seriously...NO. No job is worth my dignity.
Guest
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 1:27:55 PM

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Posts: 700,330
100% quit, and file a lawsuit. no person deserves to be verbally or physically "abused" or "uncomfortable" in the work place. There is always other places to work:) one that doesn't make you uncomfortable.
WellMadeMale
Posted: Friday, December 17, 2010 2:01:19 PM

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Location: Cakeland, United States
javier wrote:
Could you present evidence of the harrasment if you decided to report him to the police?


This kind of a situation is reported to the police in Spain, Javier?

Most intelligent people are introspective and doubt themselves while many fucktards are proudly over-confident. - a tip of the hat to Charles Bukowski
Guest
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 2:41:22 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 700,330
WellMadeMale wrote:
javier wrote:
Could you present evidence of the harrasment if you decided to report him to the police?


This kind of a situation is reported to the police in Spain, Javier?




Yes, you can report all sort of stuff at police stations, that would be the quickest way on the spur of the moment, and there they would address the matter and inform you about your options and the legal process to follow.


If a woman goes to a police station and reports anything involving any sexual offence, the cops will go and arrest the guy immediately, until the whole thing is investigated properly.
gocky97
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 2:15:20 PM

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happy8 i dont get told that im perity a lot so, i thank it woud make me fell perity
WellMadeMale
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 5:28:59 PM

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Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,531
Location: Cakeland, United States
javier wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:
javier wrote:
Could you present evidence of the harrasment if you decided to report him to the police?


This kind of a situation is reported to the police in Spain, Javier?




Yes, you can report all sort of stuff at police stations, that would be the quickest way on the spur of the moment, and there they would address the matter and inform you about your options and the legal process to follow.


If a woman goes to a police station and reports anything involving any sexual offence, the cops will go and arrest the guy immediately, until the whole thing is investigated properly.


Even for implying that the woman could get ahead in her job (or keep it) if she just sucked a guy's cock?

I thought Spain was a bit more forward-thinking/liberated, than that. Sounds like an oppressive police state.

I learn something every day.

Most intelligent people are introspective and doubt themselves while many fucktards are proudly over-confident. - a tip of the hat to Charles Bukowski
Guest
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 5:33:12 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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sprite wrote:
easy answer. i'd report his ass, quit, file a sexual harrassment claim, and pretty much stomp on his balls. :)



oooo...what she said. sounds like fun :)
Bunny12
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 8:44:33 PM

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Location: My own little world, United States
That would be one of two responses:

1. He would shrivel away embarrassed by the sarcastic uncontrollable hysterical laughter that would be bellowing out of me.

2. I'd be sucking his cock to get him as hard as can be so be could fuck me properly because I'd probably been flirting with him for a while.



Bunny12


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Ruthie
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 8:53:37 PM

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I'd report him to human resources, call his wife, and talk to a lawyer, then I'd leave his office.
youngvet
Posted: Saturday, December 18, 2010 9:28:21 PM

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never been on the other end of that statement but I did nearly get fired for chasing one of my bosses out of the building with the intent of kicking the shit out of him for calling a female coworker a dirty fucking cunt.
Christie
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 7:28:27 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/15/2010
Posts: 164
Location: USA, United States
javier wrote:
Imagine one day he says "if you want to keep working here you must spread your legs for me".


What would your answer be?


I guess this depends on many factors. Are you on a desperate financial situation? Is the guy old and ugly? Could you present evidence of the harrasment if you decided to report him to the police?

So I guess you'd rather dont focus on any specific scenario, just think how would you feel about your boss asking you to have sex in order to keep your job, and what your answer would be.



My answer would be to tell my husband to be sure to squeeze the trigger and to keep his grouping nice and tight. glasses8
LadyX
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 2:37:05 PM

Rank: Artistic Tart
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Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,804
WellMadeMale wrote:

Even for implying that the woman could get ahead in her job (or keep it) if she just sucked a guy's cock?

I thought Spain was a bit more forward-thinking/liberated, than that. Sounds like an oppressive police state.

I learn something every day.


Happens pretty much everywhere, WMM. Even in forward-thinking Spain, I'm sure.

My willingness to go along with a 'suck and fuck for employment' proposal would depend on how valuable the job was to me at the time. There's no way I could say that no matter what, I'd stomp out all offended and refuse to cooperate. These things are sometimes part of life, and you have to make decisions based on your needs, not what life would be like in a perfect world.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 4:35:21 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 700,330
First I would control the urge to beat the hell out of him and I have enought Marshall Arts training to cause a good deal of pain.

Then I would file a law suit that would make his head spin.

I have had such an experience, but them my boss is my husband or is it he is my employee. Never have been able to answer that question?d'oh!
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 7:56:07 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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Definitely not a fun thing to be asked to do! But sometimes its not like a giant disaster. Five minutes for a job? Not saying it is right just that sometimes you don't make a giant deal over every thing at work. It can get messed up.
WellMadeMale
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 9:24:45 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,531
Location: Cakeland, United States
LadyX wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:

Even for implying that the woman could get ahead in her job (or keep it) if she just sucked a guy's cock?

I thought Spain was a bit more forward-thinking/liberated, than that. Sounds like an oppressive police state.

I learn something every day.


Happens pretty much everywhere, WMM. Even in forward-thinking Spain, I'm sure.

My willingness to go along with a 'suck and fuck for employment' proposal would depend on how valuable the job was to me at the time. There's no way I could say that no matter what, I'd stomp out all offended and refuse to cooperate. These things are sometimes part of life, and you have to make decisions based on your needs, not what life would be like in a perfect world.


Yeah, I know it happens everywhere, all the time...But, the last time I checked, in America...the offended party can't expect to go to the police and accuse someone of that and expect anything other than an eyeroll from the desk sergeant at the local police department.

You'd have lots better luck taking that to the Human Resources dept, in my city. Unless you were physically assaulted, too...with DNA evidence left behind. When things get to the point where I can go tell my police that some 250 pound Wilhemina has verbally assaulted my delicate sensibilities...and I can expect results.

That's getting a bit carried away with shit, imo.

Most intelligent people are introspective and doubt themselves while many fucktards are proudly over-confident. - a tip of the hat to Charles Bukowski
Magical_felix
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 9:42:35 PM

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Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 6,344
Location: California
shi_squared wrote:
Definitely not a fun thing to be asked to do! But sometimes its not like a giant disaster. Five minutes for a job? Not saying it is right just that sometimes you don't make a giant deal over every thing at work. It can get messed up.


5 minutes!? So modest :)



Guest
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 10:01:06 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 700,330
Magical_felix wrote:
shi_squared wrote:
Definitely not a fun thing to be asked to do! But sometimes its not like a giant disaster. Five minutes for a job? Not saying it is right just that sometimes you don't make a giant deal over every thing at work. It can get messed up.


5 minutes!? So modest :)


If It was you? I'd go 10! evil4
Magical_felix
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 10:03:05 PM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 6,344
Location: California
shi_squared wrote:
Magical_felix wrote:
shi_squared wrote:
Definitely not a fun thing to be asked to do! But sometimes its not like a giant disaster. Five minutes for a job? Not saying it is right just that sometimes you don't make a giant deal over every thing at work. It can get messed up.


5 minutes!? So modest :)


If It was you? I'd go 10! evil4


You've got a deal! And an early promotion.



Rembacher
Posted: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 11:22:18 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/16/2008
Posts: 1,107
WellMadeMale wrote:
LadyX wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:

Even for implying that the woman could get ahead in her job (or keep it) if she just sucked a guy's cock?

I thought Spain was a bit more forward-thinking/liberated, than that. Sounds like an oppressive police state.

I learn something every day.


Happens pretty much everywhere, WMM. Even in forward-thinking Spain, I'm sure.

My willingness to go along with a 'suck and fuck for employment' proposal would depend on how valuable the job was to me at the time. There's no way I could say that no matter what, I'd stomp out all offended and refuse to cooperate. These things are sometimes part of life, and you have to make decisions based on your needs, not what life would be like in a perfect world.


Yeah, I know it happens everywhere, all the time...But, the last time I checked, in America...the offended party can't expect to go to the police and accuse someone of that and expect anything other than an eyeroll from the desk sergeant at the local police department.

You'd have lots better luck taking that to the Human Resources dept, in my city. Unless you were physically assaulted, too...with DNA evidence left behind. When things get to the point where I can go tell my police that some 250 pound Wilhemina has verbally assaulted my delicate sensibilities...and I can expect results.

That's getting a bit carried away with shit, imo.


Not sure about US laws, but if it happened in Canada, sexual harassment would technically be a crime, so you should go to the police, though if you have no proof there isn't much they can do about it.
Butterfly
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 12:21:02 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/21/2008
Posts: 1,238
Location: fluttering about , United States
Jebru wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:
LadyX wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:

Even for implying that the woman could get ahead in her job (or keep it) if she just sucked a guy's cock?

I thought Spain was a bit more forward-thinking/liberated, than that. Sounds like an oppressive police state.

I learn something every day.


Happens pretty much everywhere, WMM. Even in forward-thinking Spain, I'm sure.

My willingness to go along with a 'suck and fuck for employment' proposal would depend on how valuable the job was to me at the time. There's no way I could say that no matter what, I'd stomp out all offended and refuse to cooperate. These things are sometimes part of life, and you have to make decisions based on your needs, not what life would be like in a perfect world.


Yeah, I know it happens everywhere, all the time...But, the last time I checked, in America...the offended party can't expect to go to the police and accuse someone of that and expect anything other than an eyeroll from the desk sergeant at the local police department.

You'd have lots better luck taking that to the Human Resources dept, in my city. Unless you were physically assaulted, too...with DNA evidence left behind. When things get to the point where I can go tell my police that some 250 pound Wilhemina has verbally assaulted my delicate sensibilities...and I can expect results.

That's getting a bit carried away with shit, imo.


Not sure about US laws, but if it happened in Canada, sexual harassment would technically be a crime, so you should go to the police, though if you have no proof there isn't much they can do about it.


Exactly! The he said/she said factor can be a bit of a bitch, dontcha know?!

I've dealt with the somewhat smarmy, lascivious behaviors from previous employers a couple of times (as have some of my co-workers at said same place of employment). This also kind of depends on the type of job and working atmosphere you are in, to be able to prosecute and what not, as far as I'm concerned. Now I'm not, by any means, condoning such actions as far as the type of job one has but I'm just saying, from experience...me and the couple of other chics this happened to didn't have a 'leg to stand on' so to speak. Certainly causes one to become more leery and aware of such things as far as dealing with the 'bosses' at whatever job you choose. Sucks to have to watch out for that kind of shit, but it's a part of life sometimes. I'm with Christie on this one...I like that response :), but alas, I was single when I was working where I'm talking about.

I'm so very glad I don't have to deal with that kind of crap any longer: I trust who owns the business I work at now.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 2:43:22 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 700,330
WellMadeMale wrote:


Yeah, I know it happens everywhere, all the time...But, the last time I checked, in America...the offended party can't expect to go to the police and accuse someone of that and expect anything other than an eyeroll from the desk sergeant at the local police department..



Imagine you are a small business owner, and one morning two gentlemen with flashy expensive suits show up at the door and ask you to hand them 1.000 dollars every week for "protection", and suggest that in case you refused, you or your family could have an accident. You'd find yourself with option a) report it to the police, or b) pay.

So why should sexual harrassement be any different?In both cases somebody is asking somebody to do something agaisnt his/her will threatening with repercussions in case the victim didnt accept the deal. In both cases there's an abuse and there's a willingness to take advantage of somebody in a weaker situation. Doesnt matter if it's the mafia or a sexual harrassing boss, in both cases there's the same criminal nature.

LadyX
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 8:54:16 AM

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Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,804
Can we get a ruling? Is sexual harassment criminal behavior? Or is it just for civil suits?
Denny62
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 10:07:02 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 10/18/2010
Posts: 35
Location: Wisconsin
This is a bit of a sore subject for me. I lost a job because I was falsely accused. The resulting investigation, talking to some of the people I supervised, resulted in no one backing the accusations. They never even let me respond to the accusation, fired me for "failing to operate per job description". They wouldn't even confirm who the accuser was. Though I'm pretty sure it was an under preforming employee that I'd written up for valid violations.

Sorry, I just needed to get that off my chest.
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