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Guest
Posted: Sunday, November 20, 2011 11:35:38 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
what am i supposed to do if hes married but tells me its ok??? i have no idea!!????
HELP!!!!
BearInATopHat
Posted: Sunday, November 20, 2011 11:48:54 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/19/2010
Posts: 153
Location: Washington
Don't do it... unless his wife said it's ok as well then his marriage will be ruined... you don't want to be the one who ruins it.

The bear in the top hat!


Here's my facebook if anyone wants it: http://www.facebook.com/kungfujimmyd
Magical_felix
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 12:11:43 AM

Rank: Wild at Heart

Joined: 4/3/2010
Posts: 6,045
Location: California
fillmeupgood22 wrote:
what am i supposed to do if hes married but tells me its ok??? i have no idea!!????
HELP!!!!


Are you just concerned from a moral standpoint? Or are you jealous of the wife or what? If you don't like being the other woman than your answer is obvious. If the problem is that you feel guilty that you may be ruining someones marriage, don't feel that way. If the guy is wanting to stray then his marriage is already ruined. If you don't fuck him someone else will. If sex is all you want from him than go for it.

People who stray physically or even emotionally in relationships aren't committed to their partner anyway. If it's just for sex, then do it. If you're looking to be his one and only, then dont.



beast75
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 6:48:04 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 7/26/2011
Posts: 20
Location: dublin
Dont go there, soon as he gets what he wants or bored with you he will leave and go back to his wife, you dont want to be the one that caused their marriage to break up. I was on the other end of this before were my ex wife played around it caused me a lot of pain and still causing alot of pain for my children,
Best advice i can give is walk away now with your head held high
Nikki703
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 8:44:26 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 13,919
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
Magical_felix wrote:


Are you just concerned from a moral standpoint? Or are you jealous of the wife or what? If you don't like being the other woman than your answer is obvious. If the problem is that you feel guilty that you may be ruining someones marriage, don't feel that way. If the guy is wanting to stray then his marriage is already ruined. If you don't fuck him someone else will. If sex is all you want from him than go for it.

People who stray physically or even emotionally in relationships aren't committed to their partner anyway. If it's just for sex, then do it. If you're looking to be his one and only, then dont.


I pretty much agree with Felix. He is the one who is really cheating, not you. And his marriage is doomed anyhow. Personally I would never be with a married person unless it was a situation where the wife or husband knew and was totally cool with it. But that would be just for sex.

But if you are hoping he will leave his wife, he wont. If he was going to he already would be single.

And also what does he mean by "It's OK"? OK with him?
TheDevilsWeakness
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 10:34:44 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 7/19/2011
Posts: 1,341
Location: I'm the girl that your father hoped he could date.
Be careful... DON'T get emotionally attached to this guy... use protection.
Some of these sleazeballs will take whatever they can get from you, so turn the tables on him.
It sounds like he wants someone to worship him, since his wife won't. Don't do it.
Make him beg. Make him come looking for you. Don't always be available when he calls.
If you don't like the thought of being the other woman, don't be.
Be the woman he wishes he had and walk away.

Guest
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 12:57:07 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
TheDevilsWeakness wrote:
Be careful... DON'T get emotionally attached to this guy... use protection.
Some of these sleazeballs will take whatever they can get from you, so turn the tables on him.
It sounds like he wants someone to worship him, since his wife won't. Don't do it.
Make him beg. Make him come looking for you. Don't always be available when he calls.
If you don't like the thought of being the other woman, don't be.
Be the woman he wishes he had and walk away.


Where were you TDW when I started a long affair with a married man?? I could have used your advice and Magical_Felix's too.

A quick fuck is one thing and you can have fun ... and remember, it's the married person who is cheating on their spouse. But, having said that, and having experienced it ~ the single person is cheating themself, because you are wasting time.

Guest
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 5:37:38 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
You might be ruining a relationship and should tread carefully:
ArtMan
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 5:54:31 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/29/2011
Posts: 663
Location: South Florida, United States
Most likely it is NOT okay! Most likely he is just a lying cheating scumbag wanting some nookie on the side.

You are invited to read Passionate Danger, Part II, a story collaboration by Kim and ArtMan.
http://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/passionate-danger-part-ii.aspx

HK4167
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 6:54:59 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/1/2011
Posts: 3,307
Location: Seattle, United States
If he's cheating his wife now, someday he will cheat on you as well. So, don't go there.

Welcome to visit my tumblr page at http://HK4167.tumblr.com for erotic arts. Or http://slice-of-moment.tumblr.com for non-erotic arts.
stephanie
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 8:24:33 PM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 5,550
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland


Never works...... Everyone gets hurt.......

Recently received a text from an Ex who got drunk recently and told her husband that in the VERY EARLY STAGES of their union I, YES, was still fucking her on and off......

That was before..... Eventually I met the Guy, and he was a Gent and loved her in a way I can't...... They stayed in my house.... We became friends......

And after two years she tells him THAT!!!!!

It happened before I ever met him..... It never happened after......

And now, because she was drunk and wanted drama, I've lost two good friends and MORE IMPORTANTLY their marriage is in trouble.......

AVOID married people....... Can't trust 'em...................

xx SF

"A DIFFERENT kind of TINSEL decorates MY TREE!!!!" xx SF
1Zratedgal
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 8:32:45 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/1/2011
Posts: 701
Location: Northern California, United States
Unless you hear it directly from her lips, Don't do it!

I can only come from her and they be in an open marriage to be acceptable!

Kisses,

Steph
DLizze
Posted: Monday, November 21, 2011 10:51:53 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 4/23/2011
Posts: 2,568
I have never been the other woman, since it is a biological impossibility, but I have been the other man.
All I can say is DON"T GO THERE! You WILL get hurt, and you will get hurt badly.

"There's only three tempos: slow, medium and fast. When you get between in the cracks, ain't nuthin' happenin'." Ben Webster
seaking621
Posted: Tuesday, November 22, 2011 3:57:05 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 25
if the person is married run like hell ...only sorrow follows....and one you will say I COULD HAVE JUDGED MY FUTURE BY TGEIR PAST relationships should begin uncomplicated
alexgrill
Posted: Tuesday, November 22, 2011 9:18:42 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 11/22/2011
Posts: 1
You have think seriously..
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, November 22, 2011 10:05:27 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
natural and not a cause for worry
Guest
Posted: Friday, November 25, 2011 2:36:39 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
lotusbuds wrote:
natural and not a cause for worry


seriously???

coffee
adamseve
Posted: Saturday, November 26, 2011 6:38:05 AM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 11/23/2011
Posts: 2
Just ask yourself where will he be for your birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year and who he will be taking holidays with and can you accept that?
As an aside, if you are having an LDR with a married man, is that cheating?
Ruthie
Posted: Saturday, November 26, 2011 6:57:49 PM

Rank: Story Verifier
Moderator

Joined: 10/21/2010
Posts: 2,805
Location: United States
I really don't want to be responsible for breaking up anyone's marriage. I don't have any particular moral aversion to sex with married men, but I don't want to get into a relationship with someone who has a family.
poizenivy
Posted: Sunday, November 27, 2011 11:29:08 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/5/2011
Posts: 9,099
Location: In a suspended state of permanent horniness, Unite
If he tells you its ok--and I assume you mean with his wife--find out from her directly. Never take his word for it. If it is really an open marriage then you talking to the spouse about it will be a non-issue. Go into it with eyes wide open and everyone fully informed.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer. ~Swami X

nastynate69
Posted: Sunday, November 27, 2011 3:39:46 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 6/14/2011
Posts: 972
Location: United States
fillmeupgood22 wrote:
what am i supposed to do if hes married but tells me its ok??? i have no idea!!????
HELP!!!!


Easy, You come to me and I'll ''take good care of you''
Danand
Posted: Sunday, November 27, 2011 3:50:38 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 10/11/2011
Posts: 59
Location: Newcastle
Open relationships are all well and good. Everyone involved knows what they're up for and they're all volunteers. But when they try on this shit about "My wife and I have an understanding" is almost 100% of the time total crap.

Yeah....What it usually means is this: he's a faithless arsehole and she understands that.

She doesn't like it. She certainly doesn't feel good about herself for it. And you can bet his penis that while he's out sewing the oats he ought to have tamed while he was still single, she's too far up to her arse in nappies and school lunch boxes, softball practice and ballet lessons, to have the leisure to go out and get a bit of strange for her own self.

Unless you know for a fact that it's all open and above board, kick his lying arse to the curb. It's just a really shitty thing to do to another woman.







“No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.”
― P.J. O'Rourke
Guest
Posted: Sunday, November 27, 2011 4:00:17 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 691,288
Danand wrote:
Open relationships are all well and good. Everyone involved knows what they're up for and they're all volunteers. But when they try on this shit about "My wife and I have an understanding" is almost 100% of the time total crap.

Yeah....What it usually means is this: he's a faithless arsehole and she understands that.

She doesn't like it. She certainly doesn't feel good about herself for it. And you can bet his penis that while he's out sewing the oats he ought to have tamed while he was still single, she's too far up to her arse in nappies and school lunch boxes, softball practice and ballet lessons, to have the leisure to go out and get a bit of strange for her own self.

Unless you know for a fact that it's all open and above board, kick his lying arse to the curb. It's just a really shitty thing to do to another woman.


nods in total agreement
ByronLord
Posted: Tuesday, November 29, 2011 11:41:57 PM

Rank: Forum Guru
Moderator

Joined: 11/14/2010
Posts: 784
Location: Massachusetts, United States
Go for it girl!

Just understand that there is almost no chance whatsoever that the relationship will go anywhere and that if he does decide to leave her for you it is because that is what he wanted all along and you are his escape route.

Oh and if he does dump her and marry you he will do the same to you in due course.

Big risk for you is you discover that you are a bunny boiler and never knew it.

Surveys show that men and women both screw around in large numbers. Our species is not really designed for monogamy and certainly not monogamy of the type promoted by the family values hypocrites.

Of the friends I have known that got divorced almost all broke up over the kids, either who spends their time, or over education or whatever. Adultery was a factor in one divorce but the adultery was a symptom and not the root cause.

It is really not so unusual for a woman to be OK with her guy sleeping around, if they are sure that it is just sleeping around. Plenty of women have no problem with their men using prostitutes precisely because they are not rivals.

It is rather different with men of course and there are lots of men who sleep around who would have a real jealousy problem sharing their wife. But our DNA is wired for hypocrisy there.

LauraLee_sugah
Posted: Friday, December 30, 2011 6:42:30 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Sweetness

Joined: 9/10/2011
Posts: 2,347
Location: the sweet, sunny south, United States
this has been an informative discussion.... ummm... processing.....

lustyscribbler
Posted: Tuesday, January 24, 2012 5:53:12 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 35
Location: Philippines
HK4167 wrote:
If he's cheating his wife now, someday he will cheat on you as well. So, don't go there.


I agree.

I have been there. It was not easy. You can't not help but to be paranoid most of the times. And also, being sleepless sometimes because of thinking you might be hurting another person.

Just to quote a local movie, "Not all happy things are right. Sometimes, right things might be painful. but in the end, perhaps, right things can be happy, too."

He is years younger than me. I loved him, then but I choose to leave him and get hurt, but now, I am guilt-free, as well.

Sometimes, a bitch is just a girl who wears a mask to hide what's real inside her
nickatplay
Posted: Tuesday, January 24, 2012 7:40:15 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 11/7/2011
Posts: 11
Location: United Kingdom
Guest wrote:
what am i supposed to do if hes married but tells me its ok??? i have no idea!!????
HELP!!!!


It is possible to be trapped in a sexless marriage. You could have a great time, within limits, and the sex is likely to be great since he will be experienced, attentive and affectionate. Just so long as you know a bf romance will be off the agenda, but a passionate relationship could enhance your life.
BelleduJour
Posted: Friday, April 12, 2013 4:05:26 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 11/13/2011
Posts: 1,507
Location: Canada
HK4167 wrote:
If he's cheating his wife now, someday he will cheat on you as well. So, don't go there.


Exactly! There is a reason for the saying 'once a cheater, always a cheater'. You can do so much better but you need to believe that for yourself. Don't get sucked into something you may not be able to handle.

paul_moadib
Posted: Friday, April 12, 2013 5:46:12 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/31/2013
Posts: 620
Location: Docking bay 94
If he's got kids, don't do it, for their sake.

If not, well his wife is a grown up. She can handle it. If not you, he'll do it with someone else eventually.
skyeblue
Posted: Friday, April 12, 2013 7:11:30 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 2/3/2013
Posts: 11
Location: United States
100% wrong, unless they have an open relationship and you have talked with her about. That can hurt a person deeply and if they have kids it could ruin their lives.
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