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Guest
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 11:27:41 AM

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I've been thinking about monogamy and such lately and its got me wondering. Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.
One sexual encounter can destroy a marriage. Would it be worth it then just to scratch that itch?

Myself I believe in being faithful even in a bad relationship. If I really wasn't satisfied then I would end the relationship and move on. Why drag out something that isn't working anymore?


MMonroe
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 11:37:41 AM

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I completely agree with you there, if the relationship isnt working and you feel the need to cheat then why not just move on?

I have a friend who says she can see why people do cheat, and she thinks that its more acceptable for a man to cheat than a woman. I reckon its bullshit, doesnt matter who are you, who you're with, how much of a high sex drive you have (and i have quite a high sex drive), i wouldnt and dont think its worth jeopardising a relationship for a one off.
mercianknight
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 11:40:23 AM

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Now here's a can of worms that should have been left closed.

It is possible to be so deeply in love and emotionally tied to a person who does NOT, or CANNOT meet the partners sexual needs. help Reasons could range from physical through to mental/emotional. In such circumstances it is possible, nay, almost necessary to satisfy one's libido elsewhere - and it may need to be done carefully, in secret to spare the feelings of the partner. The person satisfying his/her sexual need will never get a sympathetic hearing in todays hypocritical world, so they must work it out alone and deal with any resultant guilt as best they can.

Now you can rip me to shreds - I'm a guy, I can take it.

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Guest
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 11:46:27 AM

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happy1
Guest
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 12:06:45 PM

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mercianknight wrote:
Now here's a can of worms that should have been left closed.

It is possible to be so deeply in love and emotionally tied to a person who does NOT, or CANNOT meet the partners sexual needs. help Reasons could range from physical through to mental/emotional. In such circumstances it is possible, nay, almost necessary to satisfy one's libido elsewhere - and it may need to be done carefully, in secret to spare the feelings of the partner. The person satisfying his/her sexual need will never get a sympathetic hearing in todays hypocritical world, so they must work it out alone and deal with any resultant guilt as best they can.

Now you can rip me to shreds - I'm a guy, I can take it.



That is a good point. And I have known people in that situation. In the case of physical reasons usually the couple will reach agreement, especially in a commited understanding relationship. However and this just my observation but if you are the kind of person to fall for someone who suffers from mental/emotional problems then you yourself are soft hearted and mostly likely the kind of person who would never be able to live with the guilt and eventually and mostly likely unintentionally get caught. In the end causing more pain then the few moments of sexual satisfaction was worth.

Plus news flash... the truth always comes out.. if you're cheating on your other half either they already know and are just ignoring it due their own self esteem issues or they are going to find out and then the crap will hit the fan.

mercianknight
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 12:37:52 PM

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eroticwriter26 wrote:
Plus news flash... the truth always comes out.. if you're cheating on your other half either they already know and are just ignoring it due their own self esteem issues or they are going to find out and then the crap will hit the fan.



Agreed, and very insightful of you.

Men and women approach the definitions of 'affair' and 'cheat' differently. If you have you always made an emotional attachment to the act of sex, i.e. only ever making love, then it would be hard to compartmentalise the predominantly male need for gratification. drunken Allegedly.

There's a huge Mac truck bearing down on me right now (metaphorically), do you mind if I step out of its way and simply thank you for an interesting discussion point upon which I am sure we will never find a common ground upon which to agree? Whistle

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Guest
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 1:38:50 PM

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mercianknight wrote:
eroticwriter26 wrote:
Plus news flash... the truth always comes out.. if you're cheating on your other half either they already know and are just ignoring it due their own self esteem issues or they are going to find out and then the crap will hit the fan.



Agreed, and very insightful of you.

Men and women approach the definitions of 'affair' and 'cheat' differently. If you have you always made an emotional attachment to the act of sex, i.e. only ever making love, then it would be hard to compartmentalise the predominantly male need for gratification. drunken Allegedly.

There's a huge Mac truck bearing down on me right now (metaphorically), do you mind if I step out of its way and simply thank you for an interesting discussion point upon which I am sure we will never find a common ground upon which to agree? Whistle


Men and women may see things differently that is yet to be completely determined. But I for one see the difference and feel the difference between sex with emotion and sex with out emotion. Outside a committed relationship and marriage sex can be which every way a person wants but once in a relationship is it not assumed that you have elected for sex with emotion and therefore forfeited the right to random sexual gratification? Unless both partners agree upon an open relationship it is understood that sex and all sexually related acts are a symbol of their emotional connection. Therefore engaging in extra martial gratification is cheating no matter the reasoning. There is always away to work it out and there is always a choice.

Don't kid yourself just as many women commit adultery as men do. Female sex drive thrives as much as the male. Trying to use the excuse "I'm just a guy" doesn't work anymore, if it ever really did for that matter.

And you can feel free not to comment if you wish, to save you from that truck you fear.... lol
mercianknight
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 5:22:05 PM

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eroticwriter26 wrote:


And you can feel free not to comment if you wish, to save you from that truck you fear.... lol


clown You are such a sweetie. And yes, I should apologise for doubting the libido of the glorious female.

You hit the nail on the head by pointing out that it is how we, the individuals as opposed to the gender, rationalise the scratching of an itch. As your 'devils advocate' of the moment, I remain unbowed as to the benefits of, albeit occasional, casual sex whilst in a relationship. Hell, it may even make you more appreciative of what you have once you have sampled at another restaurant. dog

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Guest
Posted: Friday, September 25, 2009 7:04:11 PM

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happy1 Throws a kernel at Ali as I listen.
Guest
Posted: Saturday, September 26, 2009 8:20:02 PM

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happy1 throws one back at rocco kekekegay
Birdie
Posted: Saturday, September 26, 2009 8:23:24 PM

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Location: United States, United States
Quote:
Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.


As far as it takes...as long as I have a good pair of shoes.
DBarclay
Posted: Saturday, September 26, 2009 8:43:10 PM

Rank: Mr Nobody

Joined: 2/28/2008
Posts: 948
Location: Florida, United States
eroticwriter26 wrote:
I've been thinking about monogamy and such lately and its got me wondering.


I have a nice monogamy desk
Guest
Posted: Saturday, September 26, 2009 8:58:29 PM

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Birdie wrote:
Quote:
Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.


As far as it takes...as long as I have a good pair of shoes.


Style or comfort?
Birdie
Posted: Sunday, September 27, 2009 6:41:28 AM

Rank: Lush Legend

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Location: United States, United States
ali2teaseu wrote:
Birdie wrote:
Quote:
Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.


As far as it takes...as long as I have a good pair of shoes.


Style or comfort?


That depends on the mode of travel.
Guest
Posted: Sunday, September 27, 2009 7:02:56 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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Birdie wrote:
ali2teaseu wrote:
Birdie wrote:
Quote:
Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.


As far as it takes...as long as I have a good pair of shoes.


Style or comfort?


That depends on the mode of travel.


Good point
Guest
Posted: Sunday, September 27, 2009 7:12:43 AM

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lmao nice guys.. you crack me up...
Bunny12
Posted: Sunday, September 27, 2009 3:38:39 PM

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Sometimes you love your S/O no less but your sex life to no avail wasn't what it once was. Going outside your marriage for sex and even passion may not be the wisest choice but sometimes is a choice you give in to. I think if you give in to that choice it must be under circumstances where you are completely discrete and you're S/O must never ever know. People who feel guilty and confess are selfish - suck up the guilt and keep it to yourself if you intend to stay with your S/O but must be sexually satisfied by other means occasionally.

Bunny12


Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off!
Guest
Posted: Monday, September 28, 2009 12:11:33 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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How far would I go?????

Thats such a loaded question for someone like me or someone in my situation..........

I have been with my husband for 19 years, we have 2 boys they are 7 and 8
His theory of Making Love is a 8 min session that he cums and I barley get wet.........
When I speak with him about this I get the line "Satisfy's Me"
So yeah what am I sposed to do then???? Go out and look for it???
I am a D.J. and get shit loads of offers but have never cheated on him, I have come to the point of maybe taking the step but chicken out each and every time.
He has cheated on me once in our marriage that I know of and I still have issues with it but I deal
I deal with it for one reason........... The 2 little pairs of eyes that look at me each day and fill my heart full of love.......
Hurting them would kill me in many ways, Their happiness means more to me than my own so I just deal

So one avenue I have found is writing, the things I have written are things I fantasize about....
I love reading erotica and so thank full for finding Lush, it has all a person could want, Awesome writers, Great Friends and most of all it keeps my inner demons at bay LOL

But dammmmm I really wanna get laid properly - the toys just are not cutting it anymore LOL



Algol
Posted: Monday, September 28, 2009 6:21:35 AM

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Not too many guys jumping on this thread…lol

I have known many people over the years that have scratched that itch, both men and women and they all had their own reasons why.


Algol

Guest
Posted: Monday, September 28, 2009 7:35:19 PM

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I wouldn't try very hard. I like easy pickins.
EnGorged
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 8:53:46 AM

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MilfBeauty wrote:

His theory of Making Love is a 8 min session that he cums and I barley get wet.........



8 Minutes??? He must be on Viagra!
WickedShads
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 1:25:08 PM

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Joined: 2/26/2009
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Well I'm not certain that the question is well worded. While I admit that there is certainly more to a relationship that sex, it is one of the higher rating categories to me. The question is also based on an assumption that one "stray" will end a relationship. That may be true in most, but certainly not all, relationships. Monogamy, or lack thereof, is also only part of the equation.

How far I would be willing to go to satisfy my sexual desires doesn't necessarily relate to my willingness to be unfaithful. Put simply, a relationship that repeatedly fails to satisfy my sexual desires will result in an increased willingness to be unfaithful. That does not, however, necessarily mean I would instantly begin actively looking for illicit affairs. The more likely result is that I would become more open to act on opportunities that may arise that I would not have considered or would have avoided or turned down had I been in a sexually satisfying relationship.

So how far would I go to be satisfied? Probably only as far as convenience and fortuitous circumstances allow. Professionals and "escorts" are not an acceptable alternative in any circumstance in my own selective set or morals.

If the question is simply would or not you would remain faithful when in a relationship where you continuously find yourself sexually dissatisfied, my answer would be "no". Would I be better off ending such a relationship rather than becoming unfaithful? Possibly, but this, like so many other other questions in life, quickly become complicated, and there are pros and cons to both choices.

The most important thing to consider when faced with the choice is whether or not you are willing to accept the consequences of your decision.



"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
mercianknight
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 1:35:02 PM

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WickedShads wrote:
Well I'm not certain that the question is well worded. While I admit that there is certainly more to a relationship that sex, it is one of the higher rating categories to me. The question is also based on an assumption that one "stray" will end a relationship. That may be true in most, but certainly not all, relationships. Monogamy, or lack thereof, is also only part of the equation.

How far I would be willing to go to satisfy my sexual desires doesn't necessarily relate to my willingness to be unfaithful. Put simply, a relationship that repeatedly fails to satisfy my sexual desires will result in an increased willingness to be unfaithful. That does not, however, necessarily mean I would instantly begin actively looking for illicit affairs. The more likely result is that I would become more open to act on opportunities that may arise that I would not have considered or would have avoided or turned down had I been in a sexually satisfying relationship.

So how far would I go to be satisfied? Probably only as far as convenience and fortuitous circumstances allow. Professionals and "escorts" are not an acceptable alternative in any circumstance in my own selective set or morals.

If the question is simply would or not you would remain faithful when in a relationship where you continuously find yourself sexually dissatisfied, my answer would be "no". Would I be better off ending such a relationship rather than becoming unfaithful? Possibly, but this, like so many other other questions in life, quickly become complicated, and there are pros and cons to both choices.

The most important thing to consider when faced with the choice is whether or not you are willing to accept the consequences of your decision.



Oh, very well said. Where we you earlier? You could have rescued me from my inept babblings. notworthy

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 1:38:21 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 816,696
Quote:
Oh, very well said. Where we you earlier? You could have rescued me from my inept babblings.


Hush now. You do just fine.

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 7:29:59 PM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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How far would I go?

I'd walk a thousand miles for one of Tech Goddess' smiles. And even farther for that thing she does with her tongue.
fish1212
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 7:49:43 PM

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Quote:
And even farther for that thing she does with her tongue.




You really should splurge and buy some self-adhesive stamps.

binky
Lisa
Posted: Tuesday, September 29, 2009 9:02:54 PM

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Joined: 3/3/2009
Posts: 5,168
Location: Victoria, Australia
eroticwriter26 wrote:
I've been thinking about monogamy and such lately and its got me wondering. Just how far people are willing to go to satisfy their sexual desires.
One sexual encounter can destroy a marriage. Would it be worth it then just to scratch that itch?

Myself I believe in being faithful even in a bad relationship. If I really wasn't satisfied then I would end the relationship and move on. Why drag out something that isn't working anymore?


Exactly.

I believe in remaining faithful for the term of the relationship (if that was the agreement in the beginning). If I ever felt the need to stray, I'd turn my energies inward and focus on my marriage. I'd much prefer working on the problem rather than seeking out another person who'd only further complicate the situation.
mercianknight
Posted: Wednesday, September 30, 2009 6:30:09 AM

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chefkathleen wrote:
Quote:
Oh, very well said. Where we you earlier? You could have rescued me from my inept babblings.


Hush now. You do just fine.



icon_smile Gee, now I'm all choked up. Not used to such gushing praise. hello2

I remain your unrepenant servant. evil4

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, September 30, 2009 9:44:17 AM

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Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 816,696
mercianknight wrote:
chefkathleen wrote:
Quote:
Oh, very well said. Where we you earlier? You could have rescued me from my inept babblings.


Hush now. You do just fine.



icon_smile Gee, now I'm all choked up. Not used to such gushing praise. hello2

I remain your unrepenant servant. evil4


Good boy. Now go oil your metal. You're squeeking a little.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, September 30, 2009 6:06:28 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 816,696
EnGorged wrote:
MilfBeauty wrote:

His theory of Making Love is a 8 min session that he cums and I barley get wet.........



8 Minutes??? He must be on Viagra!



Thank you for making me smile Babe


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