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Need help with getting your soon-to-be ex, gone? Options · View
WellMadeMale
Posted: Friday, November 23, 2012 12:23:19 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,757
Location: Cakeland, United States
Can't find the right words to break up your long term or short term relationship; the casual fuck-buddy FWB situation or to even stomp on that college crush who always seems to show up at the same parties you do?

Enlist WellMadeMale to create gentle rolling prose to gently let that person know that you've moved on and wish him or her well in the future. WMM can keep that person on a string of your preferred length and tensile strength. Or we can kneel on their neck and turn them into the floor mat which they richly deserve to experience.

You supply a coherent backstory with all critical highlights you wish to emphasize, such as: That moment you caught them cheating on you...The chintzy gifts they gave you for certain anniversaries (or forget about altogether)...Their annoying, insulting or otherwise fucktarded family and friends which introduced never ending grief and drama into your once placid lifestyle...any drugging/drinking/mental instability medications/financial distress-mooching/hygiene deficiencies, etc...which have combined to crush the very desire for them you may ever once have had.

WMM will whip you up two rough drafts which you may edit towards the final polished copy. No email addresses or identities need be revealed. Your privacy and confidentiality assured *unless you wish otherwise*.

Let's work together to create a lyrical, serious or comedic visual feast for your literate soon-to-be former lover, stalker, romance hound or the guy/gal who can't take FUCK OFF, EAT SHIT, PLEASE VANISH for an answer. Together we can close that door and nail it shut. Hearts broken guaranteed.

$125 per 200 well chosen words, give or take a few dozen. WMM can dumb it down as much as you need it.


Note to admin - no attempt to actually sell any service is being made. Unless you think Lush can make some bread doing this? evil4

Obscenity is the last refuge of an inarticulate motherfucker.
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Friday, November 23, 2012 5:58:45 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 3,139
Location: Lost in the ozone west of the Pecos, United States
Free enterprise at its finest. :)

May I suggest these two lines?

Harry Neilsen: You broke my heart and tore it apart, so fuck you.

Bob Dylan: I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes, and just for that one moment I could be you...you'd know what a drag it is to see you.

Just a couple suggestions from the management and staff of, Rumplations, a wholly outlaw subsidiary of, No Hope Enterprises.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

OF LOVE & WAR & DONNA LYNN:my historical contest also-ranbackseat sex, daydream sex, war, wounds, a love story

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
nicola
Posted: Friday, November 23, 2012 6:15:34 PM

Rank: Matriarch
Moderator

Joined: 12/6/2006
Posts: 27,470
PM sent. He just won't take NO for an answer...(well, I guess technically they ARE his kids too, and I DO live in HIS house...and he DID advance me $500K to set up lushstories.com)...
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