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LadyX
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 9:06:34 AM

Rank: Artistic Tart
Moderator

Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,804
I've noticed- both with the girls that I work with and with the girls online here at Lush that easily half of them call themselves bi-sexual.

With guys though, you hardly ever see a guy call themselves bi-sexual on Lush, and I don't have any girlfriends that have dated bisexual guys, so what is the deal?

Are there really 10 times as many bisexual girls as there are guys? Or are the bisexual guys, except for a brave few, homophobic and in the closet, afraid to be honest about themselves?

WellMadeMale
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 11:50:27 AM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,801
Location: Cakeland, United States
I fail to see how a bisexual male can be homophobic, without also being schizophrenic.

I do enjoy seeing males who proclaim to be 'mostly hetero', but also professing an interest in, or fantasies with cocks and scrotums, which are not their own.

How does that work?

Obscenity is the last refuge of an inarticulate motherfucker.
LadyX
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 12:02:23 PM

Rank: Artistic Tart
Moderator

Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,804
WellMadeMale wrote:


How does that work?
Not very well, lol. It doesn't explain why there are so many more self proclaimed bi girls than bi men.

And if homophobia means fearing and feeling negative about homosexuality- and I think it does- then it could apply every bit as much to a bisexual man who is uncomfortable with himself, and tries to deny his homosexual feelings, as it does with a straight man who is uncomfortable with other homosexuals or bis.
MrNudiePants
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 12:09:26 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/10/2009
Posts: 2,226
Location: United States
LadyX wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:


How does that work?
Not very well, lol. It doesn't explain why there are so many more self proclaimed bi girls than bi men.

And if homophobia means fearing and feeling negative about homosexuality- and I think it does- then it could apply every bit as much to a bisexual man who is uncomfortable with himself, and tries to deny his homosexual feelings, as it does with a straight man who is uncomfortable with other homosexuals or bis.


It's really very simple. Girls are prettier than guys. That's all there is to it. Hell, if I was a girl, I'd be bisexual at the least. Probably be a lesbian. Definitely not want to be with any hairy, smelly old man. So it's not surprising to me that more people are interested in having sex with pretty girls than they are with men. Not surprising at all....
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 12:10:40 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
In my opinion it is sexist. There are more bisexual girls than there are bisexual dudes. I mean when I was in High School, about 50% of the females were bisexual or lesbian, when the guys percentage was around 5-10%. I think guys just have a bigger ego. Especially in today's world.
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 12:16:42 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
Ataldeath wrote:
In my opinion it is sexist. There are more bisexual girls than there are bisexual dudes. I mean when I was in High School, about 50% of the females were bisexual or lesbian, when the guys percentage was around 5-10%. I think guys just have a bigger ego. Especially in today's world.


Read some history, because it isn't just in today's world. Far from it.
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 1:20:18 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
Isn't this strange? I was looking the place over and came across this after reading your thread. So far not one guy has answered. I think they're afraid of being type cast, as it were.

http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst11075_How-many-str8-Guys-have-felt-attraction-for-another-Guy-and-who-has-acted-on-it-.aspx
Dancing_Doll
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 1:41:22 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde
Moderator

Joined: 2/17/2010
Posts: 7,183
Location: Your dirty fantasy
I think sexuality runs on a continuum for both sexes, but definitely has a lot more fluidity for women.

Each sex might (at some point) vaguely consider it... but social reaction to it may inhibit someone from actually acting on it in real life.

Culturally (at the moment), bisexuality has actually become trendy among women (not so much with men though). The whole "Katy Perry 'I kissed a girl'" phenomenon has made it the cool thing to do if you're a girl. Whereas before, women may have hidden their experimentation, now it's almost encouraged! As well, men's fascination with watching girl-on-girl action has made it not only acceptable, but downright erotic. I know a lot of girls that "perform" for their men in bars by dancing sexy and kissing other girls... just to get a rise from the guys. Whether they take it beyond that, who knows.

I'm bi... and most of my friends are too. I don't think this is the norm, but we are a sexually charged and wild group. Many of my female friends have come on to me (to varying degrees) as well... which is kind of weird ... because I'm sure men would never consider their buddies doing the same to them after a night of partying... evil4

On a personal note, I think women are gorgeous and sexy but I swing far more to the straight side, and just enjoy playing with girls on occasion to add a little spice to life... not to any kind of serious or emotional degree.

The bi-guy thing is rare (it seems)... or maybe there is just not enough cultural acceptance for them to act on it. It seems that most guys are either super straight or gay. Or at least this is what they are able to openly admit to. Behind closed doors... might be another story...


Guest
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 3:45:29 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
chefkathleen wrote:
Isn't this strange? I was looking the place over and came across this after reading your thread. So far not one guy has answered. I think they're afraid of being type cast, as it were.

http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst11075_How-many-str8-Guys-have-felt-attraction-for-another-Guy-and-who-has-acted-on-it-.aspx



D: I'm not a guy?

crybaby
HannahBirdy
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 4:49:40 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 3/22/2008
Posts: 58
Location: United Kingdom
I think Dancing_Doll has a very fair point... I have friends, who have on nights out snogged each other, to get drinks out of men.

Also there was a saying going around - I'm all for gay marriage, as long as both girls are really hot! It's sad but true, that girl on girl action is more sociably acceptable than guy on guy, and it tends to get more and more acceptable the more attractive the women are...

Or maybe it just that more women are interested in both sexes than men are...
Guest
Posted: Monday, May 24, 2010 9:17:44 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449

one word: hedonist

Pursuit of or devotion to pleasure, especially to the pleasures of the senses.

Some people are true hedonists without boundaries of gender.

Van
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 9:56:38 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
Ataldeath wrote:
chefkathleen wrote:
Isn't this strange? I was looking the place over and came across this after reading your thread. So far not one guy has answered. I think they're afraid of being type cast, as it were.

http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst11075_How-many-str8-Guys-have-felt-attraction-for-another-Guy-and-who-has-acted-on-it-.aspx



D: I'm not a guy?

crybaby


Did you answer? When I was in there no one had.
Rawiya71
Posted: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 10:54:18 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 5/8/2010
Posts: 28
Location: Chicago
hello1

I really wish that men who do have bi tendencies be more open with themselves.

I mean, yes it is more socially acceptable which is utter BS but, I think if you have the curiosity and desire to be with someone of the same sex, don;t hide it. I don't...book

I'm a bi-female who loves bi men and who loves writing m/m.

Happy to say so too!hello1

"Writing M/M turns me on..."

Guest
Posted: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 11:00:48 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
I think there are lots of reasons why if a man is bisexual he may not want to advertise it.

Female bisexuality and female homosexuality are more acceptable by both males and females. Gay and bisexual men, IMHO face far greater bias in society at large. There are lots of reasons why some men prefer to remain in the closet, shame, fear of being found exposed, social status, all kinds of reasons where the man fears some kind of retribution for coming out. I would wager that more females are turned off by male on male action where the same females are not turned off by female to female action. Rejection by females plays a role in male behavior, that is we act, sometimes to our detriment based on our desire for female acceptance. So, a bi male would not want to lose the affections and approval of females, things gay males don't worry about. Its complicated.

I know a lot of gay guys but come to think of it no bi guys that have admitted it to me.
DazzlingLove
Posted: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 6:06:41 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 3/7/2009
Posts: 534
Location: Australia
Throughout time, men were always seen as the strong ones in control. And of course, men come with egos. Think about it, anal is one of the most submissive positions. Being on your knees is also very submissive. Some men don't want to be seen as weak to the population.
Bunny12
Posted: Thursday, May 27, 2010 7:22:27 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 9/2/2009
Posts: 1,028
Location: My own little world, United States
It's been my experience there are lots of bi sexual men on Lush they just don't advertise it and they are not really homo phobic they just don't want to deal with the stigma involved. They lead everyday lives where their partners or friends would never accept their bi sexuality so keep their true desires hidden. This goes for many hetero submissive men too. They all seem to be quite surprised to find out a dominant woman with a strap on can ring their bell better than anything! hehehe I never seem to have a lack of men who have that little epiphany after I'm done with them. I've also run into a lot of women claimiing to be bi sexual but have really never been with a women sexually so are really just curious I suppose.

Bunny12


Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off!
BigRod
Posted: Thursday, May 27, 2010 8:58:56 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 12/31/2009
Posts: 363
Location: California
ok.. I will out myself.. I am physically attracted to beautiful female impersonators and very femish shemales.. somehow I can rationalize the fact that they are piped the same as me.. I am not attracted to males nor would I seek contact individually... I also have been in 3somes where male contact has been made and wasn't rejected.. now that being said.. WMM you have absolutely no chance of reaching into my pockets.. unless Bunny or Lady is between us...
WellMadeMale
Posted: Thursday, May 27, 2010 11:30:45 AM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,801
Location: Cakeland, United States
BigRod wrote:
WMM you have absolutely no chance of reaching into my pockets.. unless Bunny or Lady is between us...



awww, you remembered, Rod. I am touched. grommit

Obscenity is the last refuge of an inarticulate motherfucker.
thepainter
Posted: Thursday, May 27, 2010 11:49:43 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/23/2009
Posts: 1,353
Location: hell, Netherlands
BigRod wrote:
unless Bunny or Lady is between us...


Hands off of hornybunny74, she's all mine. evil4

Insert typical super smart ass comment courtesy of thepainter here.
chriskayaks
Posted: Friday, May 28, 2010 5:43:59 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/20/2009
Posts: 798
Location: Caught with my hand in your panties, Canada
I have had a few experiences that may be considered to be homosexual in nature, but I wouldn't consider myself gay or even Bi. Bi-curious would be a more apt title. Of all the 'gay' experiences that I have had it was always in the presence of my wife as part of a threesome (well, ok. All but one).

Unfortunatly, some professions would take an extremely dim view of an openly gay or even bi male. I suppose that I could be an ass right now and say that it is perfectly alright for an interior designer or hair stylist to be gay and quite open about it, but it would be another story altogether for Charlie working the third shift at the local steel mill or Frank running the steam roller building the new section of I-86 in PA.

Therefore; I will come out and say it... I am a bi-curious male but shall remain in the closet about it.

Flash a Trucker... It's appreciated!!


Read my latest story at; http://www.lushstories.com/stories/exhibitionism/a-weekend-at-the-cottage-part-1.aspx
mickey26
Posted: Wednesday, June 2, 2010 10:18:21 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 6/1/2010
Posts: 20
Location: NEPA
A lot of people just don't want to label themselves. Many men feel that to label themselves as bisexual really means gay. Are you gay just because you fantasized about sex with another man or do you actually have to do the deed? Are you gay because you just want to have sex with another man or only if you are interested in romance as well?

Erotica is writing that is intended to arouse and excite sexual feelings and desires in the writer. We read erotica to get turned-on, to get hot and bothered, to get hard and wet. Admit it. Enjoy it.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, June 2, 2010 10:39:39 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
I thought everybody knew this: guys don't want to out themselves in front of a group of straight guys, and I think it's safe to say that most guys here are straight. The same is true in life. But when a guy who is on the DL finds a guy that he is attracted to, he will send the signal. I get them from guys all the time, but I let them down easy most of the time and tell them I really don't want anything to do with other men. It took courage to approach me, I realize that, and it happens a lot.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, June 2, 2010 11:13:25 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
MrNudiePants wrote:
LadyX wrote:
WellMadeMale wrote:


How does that work?
Not very well, lol. It doesn't explain why there are so many more self proclaimed bi girls than bi men.

And if homophobia means fearing and feeling negative about homosexuality- and I think it does- then it could apply every bit as much to a bisexual man who is uncomfortable with himself, and tries to deny his homosexual feelings, as it does with a straight man who is uncomfortable with other homosexuals or bis.


It's really very simple. Girls are prettier than guys. That's all there is to it. Hell, if I was a girl, I'd be bisexual at the least. Probably be a lesbian. Definitely not want to be with any hairy, smelly old man. So it's not surprising to me that more people are interested in having sex with pretty girls than they are with men. Not surprising at all....


I like a hairy man hee hee, I do honestly, esp a hairy chest. But the smelly man not so, I do like a sweaty man.
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, June 2, 2010 11:20:45 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
Ataldeath wrote:
chefkathleen wrote:
Isn't this strange? I was looking the place over and came across this after reading your thread. So far not one guy has answered. I think they're afraid of being type cast, as it were.

http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst11075_How-many-str8-Guys-have-felt-attraction-for-another-Guy-and-who-has-acted-on-it-.aspx



D: I'm not a guy?

crybaby
Your profile says your a male dontknow
sprite
Posted: Friday, June 18, 2010 11:05:12 PM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness
Moderator

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 21,141
Location: My Tower, United States
funny, but i had this conversation recently with a male friend. our conclusion is that it's more socially acceptable for a girl to label herself as bi. many women are ok with it, and men think that girl on girl sex is hot PLUS if they are bi, they have a chance to get involved as well. On the other hand, most men would probably be labled as gay if they admitted to liking other men, despite the fact that they also like woman, hence they are afraid to admit their attraction to other men.



Love not hate.
Guest
Posted: Friday, June 18, 2010 11:26:41 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
I find that I am not attracted to men at all....but...along with women, I am also interested in transexuals and CDs. Sure, I know they have a cock and balls and some of my fantasies have included such things. So yes, I've fantasized about cocks before...The difference for me is that it has to be someone that looks like a woman. I can't get excited over a hairy guy with a cock (or even a guy that has no hair) but someone that has a womans face who also has a cock, yes, I can get excited over that. Does that make me gay or bi-sexual? I don't know and really I don't care. It's just a label after all.

But I think the original question has already been answered. I believe there are 2 answers to this and that one is the answer of women being prettier. I believe the second part of the answer is that in general, guys will not admit to liking another guy or a cock. It's the way we have been brought up and the way society leads us for now.
WellMadeMale
Posted: Saturday, June 19, 2010 10:05:07 AM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,801
Location: Cakeland, United States
sprite wrote:
funny, but i had this conversation recently with a male friend. our conclusion is that it's more socially acceptable for a girl to label herself as bi. many women are ok with it, and men think that girl on girl sex is hot PLUS if they are bi, they have a chance to get involved as well. On the other hand, most men would probably be labled as gay if they admitted to liking other men, despite the fact that they also like woman, hence they are afraid to admit their attraction to other men.


For nearly twenty years, from my early twenties and through to my late thirties - I got hit on a lot by gay men and by openly bi-sexual men. The frequency was more noticeable at certain locations I was visiting, than others. My face has age written all over it and around the age of 39-40...while I did not change venues I attended - the frequency of flirtations or outright come'ons did begin to slow down noticeably until they have almost ceased entirely the last four or five years.

I'd be sitting with or dancing with women, and men would approach me, either alone (more common) or if I had a woman or two around me...and 'they' the male(s) would just come right out with their offer to dance with me...or could they perhaps buy me a drink, etc. One fellow slid his business card in front of me, while I stood at a bar one night with a male friend of mine, on the back was his note - "If you're not with the stud next to you, call me." We were not 'in' a traditional gay nightclub but a predominantly straight meat market that night.

The first few times this occurred when I was in my early twenties, I did not know if I should be insulted or flattered. I was stunned to be honest, but that was my own naviete and not 'their fault'.

I then began taking it as a form of flattery. I'm not wired that way, myself...but I can recognize a handsome male, as easily as I can recognize an attractive female. Just because I see a man and either think to myself (there is my competition in the room...and most men do size up their competition) or voice it to my female companion - "That guy has it going on, don't you think?"

Does not mean, 'to me' that I have any inclination towards homosexuality nor bisexuality. When I chose to 'run' the nightclubs back during my running days...I often preferred to do so, solo. But those evenings when I did fly with another male friend...he wasn't my wingman, nor I his. And 'he' was always a fellow I considered to be 'handsome' facially as well as physically. I don't hang with slobs nor dorks, in other words.

But what do I know. I'm not a classically trained psychologist.

Obscenity is the last refuge of an inarticulate motherfucker.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, October 26, 2010 11:01:32 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
VanGogh wrote:

one word: hedonist

Pursuit of or devotion to pleasure, especially to the pleasures of the senses.

Some people are true hedonists without boundaries of gender.

Van


BINGO!

I think a lot of self-labeled bisexuals (especially the current trend in teen/twenty somethings) boils down to a kind of hedonism.

Sex feels good. Warm, skin on skin human contact is soothing and good. People who are able to get past the social stigma of "gay" sex find that it all feels good, regardless of gender or social "roles" (ie. receptive vs. unreceptive partner). It's like eating dinner. I love a good char broiled steak, with potatoes, and texas toast...but sometimes just a salad hits the spot. Eating salad once in a while doesn't make me vegan! LOL I think a lot of bisexuals just enjoy the human form in all it's beauty.


Most men who feel this way repress and hide it for fear of being socially ostracized. I work in the Criminal Justice field, not an area known for acceptance of liberal thinking. Although I long-time and mostly-happily married, with two kids, a dog, white picket fence and the whole American Dream, if I publicly came out as Bi, my happy little world would probably crumble. Friends would judge and bail, kids would be teased, etc. Being bi is not a big enough part of who I am to risk all that I have.

It's just not that important to me.
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, October 26, 2010 12:38:51 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 784,449
i understand, dont forget that along with men who will be hiding the fact they are bi, not every man like anal. so they might be mentally attracted to men but say they are not because they dont feel they could have a physical relationship.
so maybe its just factors which are more apparent to men than they are to women.

HH
baker992009
Posted: Tuesday, October 26, 2010 2:11:35 PM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 2/19/2009
Posts: 66
Most of us men are afraid to admit we are Bi.. because most other men will automatically label us as gay... which to me is an insult. I am married... have 4 grown children... and did not explore the Bi sexual curiousitys till after my wife completely lost interest in sex. I have not had sex with her in 6 years now. We no longer even share the same bedroom. But since most women reject us older guys... we keep one another happy... by watchin porn and maybe share a j/o or b/j session. The huge majority of BI men... do not have an interest in anal sex. You may find some interest in reading some info on a website called g0ys.com Thats g zero ys .com
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