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Did I permanently lose my chance?? (anal)

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Okay, ladies...need your input. My wife was was my g/f at the time, tried anal..it lasted a few seconds..no lube...obvious noob mistake. this was years ago.

We'vve always had good foreplay...and it usually involves me rubbing my dick on her ass (whether its with on clothes on, down to our undies, even wore a condom and she would grind her ass on the bottom or tip of my dick)

Now every time I think she's gonna let me in again, she stops me and says no. I've even tried my fingers. She'll like it if i'mrubbing her through her panties, but when I try to enter, she stops me.

Have I forever ruined her because of the anal pain I caused the first time?

Is there still hope? Or should I just give up and enjoy the foreplay when it comes to her ass. Have you ever made a 180 degree turn on something similar? What would it take?

(first post here, and hope to contribute to this forum....seems pretty cool)

THANKS IN ADVANCE.
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I don't think you have ruined your chance forever. But you and your wife need to talk about this. Ask hear her fears about it, was it just because of her bad experinece getting fucked dry. Try licking her ass. go from her pussy to her ass and back and forth. Touch her ass with your fingers but be sure they are well lubed. Maybe watch vids of anal sex but try to find ones where it is done with passion and not just a guy pounding the girl. It may take time but if you discuss it with her, she may be willing to try it again. Since she did let you do it that first time, she must have some interest in it. Just be caring and considerate of her desires and try show her that she will like it.

Anal sex can be very pleasurable but it is hard to overcome a bad experience. Good Luck!
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Quote by Nikki703
I don't think you have ruined your chance forever. But you and your wife need to talk about this. Ask hear her fears about it, was it just because of her bad experinece getting fucked dry. Try licking her ass. go from her pussy to her ass and back and forth. Touch her ass with your fingers but be sure they are well lubed. Maybe watch vids of anal sex but try to find ones where it is done with passion and not just a guy pounding the girl. It may take time but if you discuss it with her, she may be willing to try it again. Since she did let you do it that first time, she must have some interest in it. Just be caring and considerate of her desires and try show her that she will like it.

Anal sex can be very pleasurable but it is hard to overcome a bad experience. Good Luck!

Seems Nikki has just about said what needs to be said. But how open are you as a couple talking about sex. If not very you may need to start much further back in your sexual relationship.

Not only do you need to have your finger well lubed when you try to slid a finger into her rear opening, but your nails need to be well manicured too.
Alpha Blonde
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Ask her if she is interested in trying anal again.

If she is, it might be worthwhile to get her a butt-plug, an anal vibrator and a bottle of lube, and let her experiment on her own a bit. She'll probably feel more comfortable going at her own pace at first so that she can have a good experience with it and understand how amazing it can feel. It might also help if she's experimenting without the pressure of you sitting there with a hard-on, wanting to speed things along. If she experiments on her own a few times, she'll probably be more open to trying again with you.

Because she had a painful first attempt, she will be all nerves at this point. If she's the one lubing a butt-plug or toy and inserting slowly on her own, she has the option to go as slow as she needs to.

I have a friend who is "trying to get comfortable with anal" and this is what she's doing to relax herself to the experience, after several failed attempts with her man... A bit of anal-training without any pressure from you is probably the best way to go with this...
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I agree with what has already been said, talking it over and buying her lube and a anal training kit for her to play with are great ideas, so is lubing ur fingers up and sliding them in, better still if she knows its just foreplay and you don't intend to fuck her ass this time.

One word of note, DO NOT fuck her pussy then ass and then try to go back to her pussy. She can get a really nasty infection that way. If you plan on making a double trip, use a condom and take it off after the first round.
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Quote by Dancing_Doll
Ask her if she is interested in trying anal again.

If she is, it might be worthwhile to get her a butt-plug, an anal vibrator and a bottle of lube, and let her experiment on her own a bit. She'll probably feel more comfortable going at her own pace at first so that she can have a good experience with it and understand how amazing it can feel. It might also help if she's experimenting without the pressure of you sitting there with a hard-on, wanting to speed things along. If she experiments on her own a few times, she'll probably be more open to trying again with you.

Because she had a painful first attempt, she will be all nerves at this point. If she's the one lubing a butt-plug or toy and inserting slowly on her own, she has the option to go as slow as she needs to.

I have a friend who is "trying to get comfortable with anal" and this is what she's doing to relax herself to the experience, after several failed attempts with her man... A bit of anal-training without any pressure from you is probably the best way to go with this...


GREAT ADVICE!! Now why didn't I think of that since this is exactly what I did. I played with toys myself before I actually tried with a person. Then I knew exactly what it would be like and it became very enjoyable.
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Quote by Recognizexl
Okay, ladies...need your input. My wife was was my g/f at the time, tried anal..it lasted a few seconds..no lube...obvious noob mistake. this was years ago.

We'vve always had good foreplay...and it usually involves me rubbing my dick on her ass (whether its with on clothes on, down to our undies, even wore a condom and she would grind her ass on the bottom or tip of my dick)

Now every time I think she's gonna let me in again, she stops me and says no. I've even tried my fingers. She'll like it if i'mrubbing her through her panties, but when I try to enter, she stops me.

Have I forever ruined her because of the anal pain I caused the first time?

Is there still hope? Or should I just give up and enjoy the foreplay when it comes to her ass. Have you ever made a 180 degree turn on something similar? What would it take?

(first post here, and hope to contribute to this forum....seems pretty cool)

THANKS IN ADVANCE.


I think you have lost your chance ..... very difficult for your wife to say .... oh yeah, sure hunnie, let's try that again .... that kind of memories lasts a LONG time!!

Best to try to replace your thoughts of anal with your wife with something else, or play anal with someone else.

Van
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A lot of great advice here.

I don't think you permanently lost your chance, but you definitely need to discuss this with your wife. If she does agree to another try, it might not be a bad idea to have a drink or two first to relax her.
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THANKS everyone. I truly appreciate it. My wife hasn't been with any other men besides me. I'm her first b/f believe it or not. We don't really have discussions about sex. We just do it.

As for tossing her salad as a precursor...i'm on the fence. I mean, I've seen some porn and its get me interested..(ex: girl in doggystyle and guys eating her pussy from behind, then starts tossing her)......but i can't go through with it for some reason.....Well, actually I know the reason.....

I'm not sure how she would react to it either. I did drop hints before and say 'I wanna kiss you everywhere', and she just smiles and we continue to mess around. Closest I've come is just kissing her ass cheeks. I've thought about placing plastic wrap to cover her ass and 'tossing' it that way, so there's a barrier......weird?????

Anyway, thanks again everyone for your replies.

Any feedback on this plastic wrap thing? =/
Constant Gardener
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Quote by Recognizexl
I'm not sure how she would react to it either. I did drop hints before and say 'I wanna kiss you everywhere', and she just smiles and we continue to mess around. Closest I've come is just kissing her ass cheeks. I've thought about placing plastic wrap to cover her ass and 'tossing' it that way, so there's a barrier......weird?????

Any feedback on this plastic wrap thing? =/


Werd! Weird, indeed.

How is this maneuver employed? I am experiencing difficulty imagining the procedure.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Active Ink Slinger
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Plastic wrap would be a definite mood killer for me.

If you're so worried about licking "that area," then maybe take your wife into the shower first and soap her up with your fingers.
Alpha Blonde
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Quote by Recognizexl
THANKS everyone. I truly appreciate it. My wife hasn't been with any other men besides me. I'm her first b/f believe it or not. We don't really have discussions about sex. We just do it.

As for tossing her salad as a precursor...i'm on the fence. I mean, I've seen some porn and its get me interested..(ex: girl in doggystyle and guys eating her pussy from behind, then starts tossing her)......but i can't go through with it for some reason.....Well, actually I know the reason.....

I'm not sure how she would react to it either. I did drop hints before and say 'I wanna kiss you everywhere', and she just smiles and we continue to mess around. Closest I've come is just kissing her ass cheeks. I've thought about placing plastic wrap to cover her ass and 'tossing' it that way, so there's a barrier......weird?????

Anyway, thanks again everyone for your replies.

Any feedback on this plastic wrap thing? =/


I've always found this term hilarious! "Tossing the salad" was actually a prison slang term whereby salad dressing was used to make the ass-licking of dominant inmates by the weaker boys a more appetizing experience. Needless to say, hygiene probably isn't at the top of the list of priorities among many prisoners.

But I digress... showering and cleaning should do the trick. As Penny mentions, use your fingers. Maybe have her take a take a long bath... enjoy the suds. It's a rather safe sex-act. If there is higher level of concern, a simple over the counter enema should alleviate any hesitations, although the concerns are more psychological than anything else. And then toss her salad and have her toss yours! It's a highly erotic experience, enjoyed by all.

And if all else fails, maybe you can try Ranch dressing or possibly Thousand Island Low-Cal.


Some Useful Links:

http://www.realprincessdiaries.com/2008/06/smoothness-and-eating-ass/

http://www.realprincessdiaries.com/2009/07/enemas-and-more-on-anal-sex/
Constant Gardener
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Quote by Recognizexl
Closest I've come is just kissing her ass cheeks.


How the Chinese eat a starfish. Start from the outside and work your way, in.


The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
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Quote by Dancing_Doll
Quote by Recognizexl

I'm not sure how she would react to it either. I did drop hints before and say 'I wanna kiss you everywhere', and she just smiles and we continue to mess around. Closest I've come is just kissing her ass cheeks. I've thought about placing plastic wrap to cover her ass and 'tossing' it that way, so there's a barrier......weird?????

Anyway, thanks again everyone for your replies.

Any feedback on this plastic wrap thing? =/


I've always found this term hilarious! "Tossing the salad" was actually a prison slang term whereby salad dressing was used to make the ass-licking of dominant inmates by the weaker boys a more appetizing experience. Needless to say, hygiene probably isn't at the top of the list of priorities among many prisoners.


Constant Gardener
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Quote by VanGogh

Oh Dear Jeezus ... I so did not need to know either thing about plastic wrap or salad dressing ....

Scarred for life now!!

Van


Would you like croutons with your salad?
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Active Ink Slinger
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Let her fuck your ass with a dildo and when she sees how much you like it she will be more likely to let you fuck hers. Worked that way for me hehehe No matter who is doing the ass fucking always use a massive amount of lubricant and start small and work your way up to larger things.
Bunny12


Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off!
Constant Gardener
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Just a question for all the asshole fuckers. No offense intended.

Why do you want to fuck an asshole, with your cock, fingers, tongue or dildo, where excrement exudes from within...when there is a perfectly good vagina, less than an inch away?

Please be as informative as you wish.

ThanksInAdvance
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Active Ink Slinger
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Whatever floats your boat/butt I guess.....

Thanks for the links Luscious and Dancing Doll
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Quote by WellMadeMale
Just a question for all the asshole fuckers. No offense intended.

Why do you want to fuck an asshole, with your cock, fingers, tongue or dildo, where excrement exudes from within...when there is a perfectly good vagina, less than an inch away?

Please be as informative as you wish.

ThanksInAdvance


looks like that could be a thread-ender!! lol
Active Ink Slinger
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So the other day she asked me what I wanted for my bday since it was coming up. I jokingly said anal and she didn't say anything. Then she if that's what you really want...

Then today she came up to me with a grin and said, soooo you really want anal for ur bday? i'll try it again...


=)