Today I climbed out of my vehicle, to walk into a Wal-Mart. That alone is not a good thing for either sex (imo)
but that's a different topic. I was with someone else, she wanted to shop there and to avoid an argument, I acquiesced.
From the 1st step out of the vehicle, I could tell.
Gawddamnit...my the scrotum flesh of my right nut was sticking to the inside of my right thigh. And here I am wearing
boxer briefs and jeans. And my nuts are glued to my leg.
You guys know what I'm talking about. Part of me wanted to walk funny and try to free up the scrotum for that free swinging
feeling. Part of me wanted to do the reach down and rearrange, but there are all sorts of Wal-Mart people around me in this
damned parking lot. 99.99% of the time, I would just say, 'fuck it'...and go ahead. But...there could be some asshole with a
cellphone camera waiting to take my picture and put my ass on that PeopleOfWalmart website. I was trapped. I scoped the
immediate 75 meters around me and...
I chose the funny walking method and after three exaggerated steps I could tell it was not going to go my way.
My nutsack was firmly stuck to my leg. It freed up about 7 horrid minutes later, as I was paying for the few cleaning supplies I had
selected. I breathed a sigh of relief and I think the male cashier thought I was flirting with him. How could I tell him, "No you're not
my type, my testicle situation just alleviated itself - you had nothing to do with this, I assure you." I could not. I just smiled at him, coyly.
That's a hazard of shaving your scrotum.
Surely there are other hazards of being a guy. Feel free to elaborate, here.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Haha. First thing off the top of my head... going to the bathroom early in the morning, still groggy... and getting the double stream. I freaking hate that!
When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates I think it's ridiculous our damn balls are on the outside of our bodies. Our bodies are muscular and strong with a high tolerance for pain. Let's just say god exists... Was he fucking high when he designed us? Why the hell would he make us so vulnerable by adding a spot we can get hit on that will completely double us over?
It's like someone designing a tank that will fall apart if a stray bullet hits it in a small one foot by one foot square weak spot on it's armor.
It's fucking ridiculous!
Having absolutely ZERO control over when, where, or for how long you get an erection! Damned thing seems to always want to stand up and be noticed in the most inconvenient times and places...
Changing hair styles. I miss my 1980's mullet. Til I remember all the shampoo I used to peel through and the time I used up, drying that rat.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Definitely the vulnerability of one's testicles. Playing tackle football led to getting "racked" many times and damn for about 5 minutes I'd be incapacitated! Horrible miserable pain. I once tried to wear a baseball catcher's cup while playing football, not conducive for running fast and I was a receiver and a linebacker, so the cup thing didn't work out.
Then there are the impromptu erections at the most inconvenient times and they seem to just linger.
And I must respond to Dancing_Doll's statement about the bikini wax. I am about to find out. My fiancée wants me to get my chest waxed next week so I'll be baby smooth for our honeymoon, also getting a few other parts waxed. I guess I'll find out about how much that hurts. haha
I usually just use an electric razor to either trim down my chest hair or shave it off, usually just neatly trimmed down to barely there. Maybe all the excess hair could be a complaint. eh?
But on the upside...gorgeous women fall in love with us!!!!
I seem to remember from biology class that balls are on the outside for heat/cool regulation due to the sensitivity of sperm to temps too hot or cold... which is why your bag shrinks up like a frightened turtle when swimming in cold water and hangs down to your knees when you're overheated. Having said all that I agree the Creator could have figured something out a little more practical!!
The thankfully rare but always unexpected moment when you catch your foreskin in your zipper when doing up your pants. It HURTS!!!! And when you get your breath back you know it's going to hurt AGAIN when you have to unzip to free that little pinched piece of flesh.... Urrrrgh!
xx S
The thankfully rare, but surprisingly painful moment when, just after you've crossed your legs, while sitting - you realize you've just racked your own clumsy self...again.
It always goes back to those sperm manufacturing glands, hanging outside our bodies, doesn't it?
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
External genitals seems to be the common complaint here......try having boobs for a day.
No wait....ok, stop imagining fondling them or whatever else you boys would do with your own set. I think breasts may be the female equivalent of testicles. When it's hot and sticky they stick to you, it hurts when you bump them on something and god forbid getting your nipple caught in a zip!
When thinking about your nads spare a thought for boobs! Which may actually lead to what Aramis was talking about....
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BB
