How to judge someone's kink level?

Rookie Scribe

0 likes 6 Jul 2011

I've been with quite a few girls who have enjoyed different levels of kinkiness. I've been wanting to date/see someone with whom I could explore this area more. I'm not talking about anything too obscure; mostly BDSM and exhibitionism; I've been wanting to explore more serious bondage and verbal domination.

What are the best ways to figure out if a girl is into these things? Alot of the time the kinkiest ones are not the type I would expect. I was seeing this one fairly innocent, small town type of girl who was pretty kinky; hand-cuffs, blindfolds, etc. After that I was seeing this bohemian, artist type girl who was very vanilla.

Secondly, what timeframe can be expected? I normally start to test the waters after about a month or two. Can I start to hint at it sooner? I feel like hinting at it any sooner would leave me open to hurt and embarrassment.

I'm 20 years old and have been hooking up with university students almost exclusively. I'm hoping someone with a bit more life experience could give me their ideas.

dan17

Active Ink Slinger

0 likes 7 Jul 2011

as you talk to her and get into that part of the topic you will know earlier once she is the one you wanted/looking for

mrgay

Guest

Lurker

0 likes 7 Jul 2011

There are places you can seek people of similar interest out.
When I was about your age, my friends and I would to play drinking games that would give us hints about a person's kink level.
Some actually advertise it in the items they wear.

Guest

Lurker

0 likes 7 Jul 2011

I dont think you can judge when first knowing someone, the best way is to introduce it slowly and ask outright what theyre ok with - or not.

Dancing_Doll

Alpha Blonde

0 likes 7 Jul 2011

"Sex is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you gonna get..." geek

WellMadeMale

Constant Gardener

0 likes 8 Jul 2011

Adultfriendfinder.com has a sister-site devoted to alternative lifestyles. I suggest trolling a personal ad at one of those websites which cater to such. I mean, you're not going to go looking for her in places she is not most likely to be are you? Unless you're directed and focused, you could go months or years before you meet her.

I've had some luck just outright asking around at parties and nightclubs: "You wouldn't be into wooden ponies would you? Flogging, boot-licking or collared sex slave submission 24x7 ring any bells for you?"

The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.

Milktin

Rookie Scribe

0 likes 8 Jul 2011

Quote by WellMadeMale
Adultfriendfinder.com has a sister-site devoted to alternative lifestyles. I suggest trolling a personal ad at one of those websites which cater to such. I mean, you're not going to go looking for her in places she is not most likely to be are you? Unless you're directed and focused, you could go months or years before you meet her.

I've had some luck just outright asking around at parties and nightclubs: "You wouldn't be into wooden ponies would you? Flogging, boot-licking or collared sex slave submission 24x7 ring any bells for you?"

Thanks for the tips. I checked out the site an it looks pretty deserted in my area though. I guess I'll take the party/nightclub route and hope my reflexes are good!